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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 129: "Thanksgiving Flavored Candy Corn"



Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 129: "Thanksgiving Dinner Candy Corn"

Transcription


*Please pardon any and all spelling errors!




[00:00:00] THEME SONG: Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!


[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: Hello,

[00:00:33] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey. Well, hello, listeners. Welcome back to Review That Review. We are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing.

[00:00:45] Chelsey Donn: Reviews!

[00:00:47] Trey Gerrald: That's Chelsey

[00:00:48] Chelsey Donn: I'm that Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:50] Trey Gerrald: And together, we are,

[00:00:53] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens,

[00:00:58] Trey Gerrald: is it 50 Ways to Eat Cock? Or are we Goblin Goblin on a fantastic pre Thanksgiving? Are you Thanksgiving? Are you Thanksgiving?

[00:01:08] Chelsey Donn: I'm Thanksgiving,

[00:01:09] Trey Gerrald: I think I'm Thanksgiving too, I'm excited, I obviously love pumpkin pie, and I'm ready to engorge on pumpkin pie tomorrow.

[00:01:17] Chelsey Donn: okay, I know maybe you're ready for something else in addition to pie, something, something to go along with the pie because every pumpkin pie needs a little like whipped cream and every episode of Review That Review needs someone to

[00:01:32] VOICEOVER: Ledge a Complaint,

[00:01:34] Trey Gerrald: A little dollop of complaint,

[00:01:36] Chelsey Donn: dial up a complaint daisy.

[00:01:38] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, well today, you know, speaking of engorging yourself with food, I feel like we talked about this last Thanksgiving, but this um, theory of tryptophan making you sleepy. Today I want to lodge a complaint against getting all cuddled up in a blanket or in your bed, under the comforter, and somehow, when you unfurled the blanket.

It's upside down and that tag is in your face.

[00:02:02] Chelsey Donn: Oh, yes.

[00:02:03] Trey Gerrald: I hate nothing more than feeling the warmth of, say, I don't know, a down comforter or like a nice fleecy warm blanket and then you get that scratchy scratchy scratchy scratchy of the tag. What? And what is this whole thing with like furniture where it's like do not

[00:02:22] Chelsey Donn: Don't remove?

[00:02:23] Trey Gerrald: Yo, what is that? I hate it. It occurred to me when I had made the bed the other day and I didn't clock that the tag was where my face was gonna go instead of where my tootsies are gonna go. Have you ever been in this conundrum? I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

[00:02:40] Chelsey Donn: I've definitely been in this conundrum. I mean, there's just nothing worse than in any situation feeling like you're going to be comfy and then being interrupted by a stiff, pointy tag.

[00:02:52] Trey Gerrald: Talking about a cock gobbler.

[00:02:56] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, no, I feel you, Trey. I mean, I also, I wonder, I think the don't remove the thing is about the warranty, maybe. Ooh, you guys, Trey is indulging in a Thanksgiving cocktail.

[00:03:07] Trey Gerrald: point it out. I was trying to be discreet because you look down.

[00:03:10] Chelsey Donn: Okay, well, it's so decadent. It's in a, like, martini glass and it's so fancy.

There's even, is that a sliver of lemon? Like a very thin

[00:03:21] Trey Gerrald: it's actually an orange peel. This is the, um, this is the Hillstone recipe for a cosmopolitan.

[00:03:28] Chelsey Donn: Trey, that is so sexual.

[00:03:31] Trey Gerrald: I know, it feels very adult.

[00:03:33] Chelsey Donn: I really wish I was there and I could be cheersing to a happy Thanksgiving or happy

[00:03:38] Trey Gerrald: Are you about to punk me and ring my doorbell?

[00:03:40] Chelsey Donn: Day of Gratitude. Ding dong!

[00:03:43] Trey Gerrald: More like ding dong dash, because I know you're not here.

[00:03:46] Chelsey Donn: I'm not, but I have my water. But anyway, yes, I hear you.

[00:03:50] Trey Gerrald: you are right about the tag for a warranty thing, but, so here's the question, do you cut tags off of, like, your blankets, your comforters, your, all of that stuff?

[00:03:58] Chelsey Donn: like with, with abandon, without abandon, with like just, yes, without abandon, I think that's,

[00:04:05] Trey Gerrald: Well, you know, we, we are like proud proponents of the company Cozy Earth for all of our bedding. We've talked about it before

[00:04:13] Chelsey Donn: yes, we've talked about it because Trey's, staying in Trey's guest room is such a treat.

[00:04:18] Trey Gerrald: Well, that's nice. Thank you. We're currently staying in the guest room because our primary bathroom is being redone, which is a whole conversation, which, oh, that should be a complaint. Okay, making a note. Um, but they thankfully, like, they do like, and then, like, it's like a seal, like a, you know, it's like when you now buy t shirts and they have the tag printed on the fabric, like, they have, like, but it's like an embossed, it makes me think of, like, uh, what are the, what are the people you pay for to notary?

You know the little notary seals?

[00:04:49] Chelsey Donn: a notary seal of approval,

[00:04:50] Trey Gerrald: It's like the logo for The Secret. Yeah, where they, like, would print it in wax or

[00:04:54] Chelsey Donn: a stamp, stamp, a wax stamp,

[00:04:57] Trey Gerrald: Anyway, that's my

[00:04:58] Chelsey Donn: God, we would be so good at 100, 000 pyramid

[00:05:02] Trey Gerrald: You think?

[00:05:03] Chelsey Donn: is, no,

[00:05:05] Trey Gerrald: I

[00:05:05] Chelsey Donn: mean maybe, I think they should apply for us.

[00:05:08] Trey Gerrald: Oh, and then wait quickly before we move on. What did everyone think of last week's episode with Joe?

Wasn't it just amazing Joe Kozian?

[00:05:15] Chelsey Donn: as if I I could fall more in love with Joe Kinosian I already loved him just in theory. I didn't really know Joe that well prior to recording and then he's just such a delight you guys

[00:05:28] Trey Gerrald: I know

[00:05:29] Chelsey Donn: Like, A human.

[00:05:31] Trey Gerrald: A one yes. Circle back

[00:05:34] Chelsey Donn: Sorry, go back. A1 human, you guys. I hope you enjoyed that.

[00:05:37] Trey Gerrald: when I was editing it the whole time, like I kept, I texted him multiple times to be like, you were so charming on this episode. Like

[00:05:43] Chelsey Donn: He's just so charming in general. I love, love, love Joe Kinosian. Not, I mean, he created our theme song, but also he's just such a stellar human.

[00:05:54] Trey Gerrald: That was a really nice moment of thanks.

[00:05:56] Chelsey Donn: Yes, you're right. Thank you, Joe Kinosian.

[00:05:58] Trey Gerrald: Do you want to pivot into some more? Thanks? Perhaps? I don't know. I don't know what you brought in. Chelsey,

[00:06:04] Chelsey Donn: I want to pivot to more. Thanks.

[00:06:05] Trey Gerrald: do it. Let's jump into an online review.

[00:06:07] Chelsey Donn: Whoo. Let's do it

[00:06:11] VOICEOVER: Review That Review,

[00:06:15] Chelsey Donn: Alright as you know, we are your trusty review Queens We bring in reviews from the internet that we feel need to be inspected

[00:06:24] Trey Gerrald: We read you the review. We break it down and rate the impact of that review on a scale from zero to five. Gobble! Gobble! Crowns. It's a very regal process that we call.

[00:06:35] VOICEOVER: Assess That

[00:06:37] Trey Gerrald: And Chelsey, all us turkey gobblers. Yeah, that's what it is. Turkey gobblers. We've moved on from cock gobblers to turkey gobblers.

[00:06:43] Chelsey Donn: That's

[00:06:44] Trey Gerrald: What have you got for us this week?

[00:06:46] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Well, keeping that gratitude, you know, train going this week, Trey, I have a special Thanksgiving treat for us. We have a review that was sent to us via Instagram. Somebody, James Donegan, AKA James Donna Graham slid into our DMs and sent us a very special Thanksgiving themed review.

So James Donna Graham. Thank you so much for sliding into our DMs. Guys, slide into our DMs all the time. We love to hear from you. We want to hear your reviews. We want to hear what you want the queens to review. So for you, James Donogram, we are going to review this review. All right. So, in addition to James Donogram being a queen, he's also sent us, alert, alert, a new source.

What? I thought we have thought of everything, but apparently, we haven't. So this is one of those sources that there's like multiple layers. So basically, James Donogram sent us a link to a page called Hungry AF, okay? Do you guys know the... Instagram handle, I'm 30 AF,

[00:08:05] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I think I follow them.

[00:08:06] Chelsey Donn: yeah, so it's the same, it's like their sister, Instagram handle, Hungry AF, that is like all about food posts, so this is,

[00:08:15] Trey Gerrald: is it a page or is it an Instagram account?

[00:08:18] Chelsey Donn: so this is Instagram, I'm sorry, this is very difficult to explain, but so on Instagram, James slid into our DMs, he shared with us, A post from Hungry AF that was screenshots of a text diatribe on Twitter aka X from, are we following?

[00:08:40] Trey Gerrald: many layers. You're right.

[00:08:41] Chelsey Donn: I know, it's many layers, from an account called AtMomOfNoRank.

So this review is written by, at, mom of no rank, on, are we calling it X now? Okay, on X, and it is one of those just like, bop, bop, bop, bop, because you know, X limits you. So it's like, guys, let's buckle in, because it's, it's a long review, and it is for you guys. I don't even know how this is possible, that this is a thing, but.

Brock's Turkey Dinner and Apple Pie and Coffee, Candy, Corn. So it is Brock's Turkey Dinner, Candy, Corn.

[00:09:32] Trey Gerrald: But with also the flavors of apple pie and coffee. Is that the

[00:09:35] Chelsey Donn: it's the whole turkey dinner. So in this review written on eggs by at mom of no rank, she is going to break down for us all of the elements, all of the colors, kind of like how Trey and I did.

That's why James said he thought of us kind of like what Trey and I did in an after show a while back where we broke down these jelly beans. Mom of no rank is about to do that for us.

[00:10:01] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I can't

[00:10:02] Chelsey Donn: this is very exciting. In the end, I'm like, I don't know if I should announce the star amount. I'm gonna let Mom of No Rank announce the star amount at the end because they do.

We're just gonna jump right in. Thank you, James. Please also send us all the reviews and here we go at Mom of No Rank. Here is an example of each flavor. When you open the bag, you'll smell only the coffee ones. This is a transparent and deliberate attempt to lull you into a false sense of security. Don't be a sucker.

First of all, there is a special place in hell for whoever decided to make three of the flavors so similar in color. In a just world, this person would die alone, Surrounded by ugly, pink, floral wallpaper, After a lifetime of petty disappointments, With the sound of a super fun and fashionable party, Absolutely everyone else was invited to, Drifting across the street. Top left is Turkey and Gravy. It is... Disturbingly, hauntingly, like candy turkey, Wrong on every, top middle is stuffing, Tastes like hate and sage, So much sage, it's ironic, Because you'll need to burn sage to erase it from your psyche. 6 out of 18. Top right is Caramel Apple Pie. It's fine. Most poignant flavor is caramel with a surprisingly natural cinnamon background and then a crisp finish with just a faint whisper of, oh, the artificial flavoring that once spent 15 minutes in a room.

With an apple pie, scented, hashtag, Yankee Candle, with the lid closed, bottom left is allegedly cranberry sauce, what should have been a softball in the flavor development game instead offers nary a smidge of either cranberry or tartness. There is, however, the vaguest intimation of alkaloid bitterness,

[00:12:48] Trey Gerrald: Ew.

[00:12:49] Chelsey Donn: best guess, cotton candy cough drop, middle is...

Green beans. Friends, it is unforgivable. If you left a cup of green tea on the porch in bad weather for a week, during which time it attained sentience and promptly began plotting your demise, and you hate green tea, that's what this tastes like.

[00:13:19] Trey Gerrald: Ew. Ew.

[00:13:21] Chelsey Donn: some dirt in it. And, is that a hint of dead leaf or decomposing June Beetle?

[00:13:31] Trey Gerrald: Ew.

[00:13:32] Chelsey Donn: You'll have the stabbing pains of deep regret for company as you work that one out. Lastly, bottom right is coffee. It's the best one, and it's terrible. It's what you hoped coffee would taste like when you were five, alarmingly sweet, kind of butterscotchy. It's second cousin, twice removed, has heard of coffee, The stuffing one is by far the worst flavor, It is appalling, Pepperidge Farm has apparently taken up training assassins, I've met voodoo dolls with less evil intent, The developer of this flavor deserves your disdain, and for that, I salute them.

However, I think my personal pick for most offensive to hashtag Thanksgiving food is the green bean. It is not green bean casserole, by the way. Oh, no. No umami here. Raw, unholy, green in flavor as well as color with a single one note foghorn taste like mowing the lawn with your mouth open,

[00:14:50] Trey Gerrald: What?

[00:14:51] Chelsey Donn: to paraphrase Douglas Adams, It is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike green beans.

It's what you might get if you described green beans to an alien who had been tasked with reproducing the flavor using only very inexpensive petroleum based esters. And, you never actually had green beans, and also, the alien hated its job, Five Stars, star, star, star, star, star, Everyone should get a bag, Set them out in a nice inviting bowl, and don't Say a word.

[00:15:39] VOICEOVER: Kvetch,

[00:15:40] Chelsey Donn: And just so we know the at, um, I'm starving AF, like caption for this was turkey dinner, candy corn is pure chaos and absolutely no one asked for this, but I'm not going to keep an eye out for it. And then they, they linked to the Twitter mom of no rank.

[00:15:57] Trey Gerrald: So wait, so in the end, is this a five star review?

[00:16:01] Chelsey Donn: Correct. That's what I'm saying. That's why I was like, I don't want to give it away in the beginning because they do bring it up even though this is a Twitter review, which wouldn't normally have a scale, but they, they assigned this five scales. Makes me think of what do they think of their friends that they would want to torture

[00:16:18] Trey Gerrald: I mean, I think that's hilarious.

[00:16:20] Chelsey Donn: Do you think it

[00:16:20] Trey Gerrald: Well, I think it's funny because, yeah, I, I love little small pranks. I think that's very funny. Wait, okay, so are they candy corns or are they gr gel? Are they Jelly bellies?

[00:16:31] Chelsey Donn: They are candy corns. So they, they look the same as candy corns, except instead of there being just that like one candy corn color, there's like the green one for green beans, but we'll have to share this on the Instagram story the week this comes out

[00:16:46] Trey Gerrald: So the, so the candy corns are a single color. They're not three colors. Because in my mind, candy corns

[00:16:53] Chelsey Donn: They are two colors, but it's like, it's really one color, because it's primary.

[00:16:58] Trey Gerrald: Here, I'm looking.

[00:16:59] Chelsey Donn: There's like a little bit of white at the bottom, you know, it almost looks like a tooth that's like discolored.

[00:17:05] Trey Gerrald: it looks like weird teeth.

[00:17:07] Chelsey Donn: That's what I just said, yeah, it looks like teeth,

[00:17:09] Trey Gerrald: These are like either two colors or the green one is just simply green.

[00:17:13] Chelsey Donn: The green and the red are like that eye exam test, when they're like, How many colors do you see?

[00:17:19] Trey Gerrald: Okay, so Brocks, obviously, like, is known for, I guess, oh, I guess I do think of Brocks as, like, Halloween little pumpkins, like the candy corn flavor, but they're little

[00:17:30] Chelsey Donn: And also jelly

[00:17:31] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I think of them as jellybeans, but I guess Brocks is the candy corn company. Okay, because that was very perplexing to me for the majority of that review.

So, Mommy, you have rank here. So, the most successful is coffee, because don't you ima Even though she goes on about how it's not successful, But wouldn't you imagine that coffee probably did exist prior to this marketing

[00:17:53] Chelsey Donn: Coffee as a candy corn?

[00:17:57] Trey Gerrald: Oh yeah, you're right. But probably had a flavor profile.

[00:18:00] Chelsey Donn: Well, certainly, because there's like coffee jelly beans. Yes. I mean, but

[00:18:04] Trey Gerrald: wait, that's a good question. I wonder if they do other thematic candy corns. Also, it's weird to me that it's candy corn on Thanksgiving. Why wouldn't they just go back to jelly beans?

[00:18:15] Chelsey Donn: corn is I think kind of Thanksgiving y, like it's like still the harvest or coming out of Halloween. Now we're like on to Thanksgiving where I can definitely imagine there being corn at the table. So like it makes sense beyond just Halloween.

[00:18:29] Trey Gerrald: that's a good point. Well, now looking at this image, I really do see that the three orange y, light brown colors really are very similar. It really is hard to distinguish. So that makes a little more sense in Mommy's Review.

[00:18:44] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:18:45] Trey Gerrald: Also, I'm obsessed with the phrase, Petty Disappointments,

[00:18:49] Chelsey Donn: I thought of, I immediately, of course, our friends over at, um,

[00:18:53] Trey Gerrald: Oh, Petty Crime,

[00:18:54] Chelsey Donn: Petty Crime,

[00:18:55] Trey Gerrald: Laugh, Larceny.

[00:18:56] Chelsey Donn: Live, Laugh, Larceny.

[00:18:57] Trey Gerrald: What do you think that mommy's job is besides being a mom of no rank? Cause their vocabulary is pretty impressive to me.

[00:19:04] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I almost wonder if they're, they were like a teacher or a lawyer.

[00:19:11] Trey Gerrald: least, I think they were an English major. At very

[00:19:14] Chelsey Donn: for sure. They definitely know how to write. There wasn't a single spelling error in this. We gotta get into some of the nitty gritty, Trey. Like, what, what was like the part that stood out the most to you?

[00:19:25] Trey Gerrald: Well, I have like 18 things written down here. The distinction between green bean and not even green bean casserole is so funny to me because I love green bean casserole.

[00:19:37] Chelsey Donn: It's so amazing to me when they make these products. Like, is anyone buying this as not a joke?

[00:19:42] Trey Gerrald: Well that's my question. Like what are you aiming for when you're conceiving this idea? It's like when these gourmet ice cream places make like mac and cheese ice cream. It's like these mediums don't go together. So what is then the intention? Because do you want to be accurate? Which is then really disgusting?

Or do you want to be like, playful and reminiscent? What is the goal, Brocks?

[00:20:08] Chelsey Donn: What is the goal, Brocs? Can you tell us, Brocs? What's the goal, Brocs? I mean, I don't know, but I think that this has to be a joke. What do we think of, like, the style of comedy, Mommy's style of comedy?

[00:20:21] Trey Gerrald: Alright, well, okay, so, I think because it's a super hybrid thread on X or Twitter, I think reading it versus hearing it out loud sort of lands differently, because there's a context in a way of like, You see how many people liked this section of it, but to be fair, in my opinion, I felt like it became a little redundant of like, my goal is to spell out how horrible each of the flavor palettes are by going so far and extreme of like, we ran out of earthly things and then we start, we end with an alien?

Like,

[00:20:59] Chelsey Donn: Right. Right.

[00:21:00] Trey Gerrald: know so but

[00:21:01] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, it didn't, it didn't have, like, necessarily, like, a, a straight build of, like, hilarity, even more hilarity,

[00:21:09] Trey Gerrald: it was sort of the same thing for each flavor which made me laugh i mean i was laughing and i love it's very much like the blue mountain review where it's like this soup looks like glue so i obviously tried it it's like this is how terrible this is so go buy it and make your friends eat it

[00:21:27] Chelsey Donn: yeah,

[00:21:28] Trey Gerrald: that made me really laugh too But, I don't know how long it took Mami to write this, but they have really funny, hysterical, like, metaphors.

Especially the whole section about voodoo dolls with less ill will. I mean, that is such a funny thought. Like, I think that Mami needs to be, like, a sitcom writer.

[00:21:47] Chelsey Donn: yeah, oh, for sure, I think that Mommy has like very interesting POV, like, I think this might have played better as like a sketch, like I almost wish I could see visuals with it,

[00:21:59] Trey Gerrald: Some, yeah. Someone should animate this on

[00:22:02] Chelsey Donn: yeah, like if this was animated, maybe this would, if anyone's listening and they're an animator and they want to animate this.

[00:22:07] Trey Gerrald: What is alkaloid bitterness? That makes me think of batteries. Alkaloid?

[00:22:12] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, like a battery.

[00:22:13] Trey Gerrald: Like, who thinks of those two words together? Mommy is genius,

[00:22:17] Chelsey Donn: Mommy is genius.

[00:22:19] Trey Gerrald: a decomposing beetle,

[00:22:20] Chelsey Donn: A decomposing fetal sounds gross.

[00:22:22] Trey Gerrald: petroleum based asters, what, is that?

[00:22:27] Chelsey Donn: I, esters, I don't know. I've never even heard of the word esters

[00:22:31] Trey Gerrald: What is that? Esther?

[00:22:32] Chelsey Donn: I think it's like a wine thing, like a wine, um,

[00:22:37] Trey Gerrald: is it like a scent or something?

[00:22:38] Chelsey Donn: an organic compound that reacts with water to produce alcohol and organic or inorganic acids. This person is

[00:22:46] Trey Gerrald: So maybe it wasn't English, maybe they were a

[00:22:48] Chelsey Donn: Maybe they're a chemist.

[00:22:50] Trey Gerrald: or both,

[00:22:51] Chelsey Donn: major, English chemistry.

[00:22:53] Trey Gerrald: yeah, I mean, I just don't understand the point, because I don't see how it would be successful, like, if you're going for accuracy, it's going to be disgusting, so. I'm perplexed. So the useful information here to me is that it's like really appalling.

[00:23:08] Chelsey Donn: Yes, for sure.

[00:23:09] Trey Gerrald: That it just like is not enjoyable. It's not even funny. Like, don't go for it. Like, do this to

[00:23:15] Chelsey Donn: It seems like those, like, disgusting jelly beans from Harry

[00:23:18] Trey Gerrald: Exactly. That's exactly what I was thinking. Spelling grammar seems pretty on

[00:23:23] Chelsey Donn: really spot on. Like, honestly, mom of no rank is, like, a lot smarter, I think, than both of us.

[00:23:29] Trey Gerrald: So do we think So I'm perplexed on Truthful Shady because I feel like, I feel like they really didn't like it, I think that's truthful, but I'm wondering about the shady factor because they're leaning so hard into the humor of like, how much are you sending it up? Like, how shady? Then they are saying it's five stars.

So they want you to go buy it to trick your

[00:23:49] Chelsey Donn: like it's, I think it's shady in the sense that like, if we were talking to a Bronx representative, well, it's an interesting thought. If we were talking to a Bronx representative, would they be happy or sad about this review?

[00:24:01] Trey Gerrald: Well, I don't know. 'cause all press is good press.

[00:24:04] Chelsey Donn: Right. I, at first I was going to say bad, but then I was thinking, yeah, but if this has been shared 15, 000 times,

[00:24:11] Trey Gerrald: I mean, it almost makes me wanna buy it just to see how bad, it's like, it's almost like genius marketing, which is, I, I wonder if that is part of the goal for Brocks is like candy, corn, whatever. Do they make these weird thematic flavors, like as some sort of spice to en entice you to buy it? 'cause you probably wouldn't think of it.

You know, like I just.

[00:24:33] Chelsey Donn: percent. I mean, I feel like that's like literally Trader Joe's in a nutshell, like every other month, it's like it's pumpkin season and there's fricking pumpkin and everything. And now I need the pumpkin variety or all of a sudden everything is coconut, you know, or whatever it is. Mango. A lot of people obviously found this very funny.

I mean this as of the time. This was screenshotted by I am Starving af. There were 15,700 re-shares and 985 replies. And it was written in 2021 actually.

[00:25:06] Trey Gerrald: that's so wild how long it takes for things

[00:25:09] Chelsey Donn: in October 2021. So

[00:25:11] Trey Gerrald: is quite a dream, like, for this to have this resurgence,

[00:25:15] Chelsey Donn: wonder if this was like Mom of No Ranks, like this must be because it's still pinned. This must have been their like, this is their home run.

[00:25:23] Trey Gerrald: I would think,

[00:25:24] Chelsey Donn: So clearly we have to give them points

[00:25:27] Trey Gerrald: and it's gonna resurge every Thanksgiving, I imagine.

[00:25:30] Chelsey Donn: Right, which is,

[00:25:31] Trey Gerrald: have staying power,

[00:25:32] Chelsey Donn: that's right. I agree. I totally agree.

[00:25:35] Trey Gerrald: but definitely entertained. Humor, obviously, is good. And, I mean, I don't know about the impact deal breaker because it feels like it's a negative review, but it's a

[00:25:44] Chelsey Donn: but then in the end it sort of switcheroo, I mean both of us are now saying we're kind of curious,

[00:25:50] Trey Gerrald: I feel, how do I feel about this? I feel like I could crown it.

[00:25:54] Chelsey Donn: I think I can crown, oh wait, and I just want to say quickly, James D., if you're listening, we would love it if you would call in and leave us your ranking, how many crowns would you give this review since you handed it in, so call us at 1 850 REVIEW ZERO, now let's go into the crowning,

[00:26:12] Trey Gerrald: all right, So, Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards. In an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.

[00:26:23] VOICEOVER: The Queens are tabulating,

Total Score,

[00:26:31] Chelsey Donn: Okay, interesting. I'm holding up four and a half crowns and Trey's holding up three and a half crowns. Why three and a half crowns? For mommy or at mom of no rank.

[00:26:40] Trey Gerrald: Well, I appreciate the unique take on the medium and like, I think there's a lot of ingenuity here. Obviously, I think the intelligence level is super interesting, not something we come across very often when we're like, you know, reviewing a wooden rake from Home Depot, but I just, I get a little lost in what the point is.

Is it just for humor? I think maybe, and I like the turn at the end of like, it's actually five stars, everyone should get a bag.

[00:27:08] Chelsey Donn: Right, right, right,

[00:27:09] Trey Gerrald: I guess I do feel like I kind of want to taste it now. So then I start thinking, is this a plant? Does mommy secretly work for Brock's? I mean, but then it's like, how do you predict going back?

It's like, and this was written two years ago. It's like, so I'm saying three and a half because I have a lot of questions. But, ultimately, like, very delightful, very enjoyable, and I can't tell if they wanted it to, like, is this a negative review, is it pos so that's why I'm sort of, like, somewhere more central rather than extreme on either side, but very funny, thank you for bringing this to our attention, James.

Chelsey, why did you say four and a half nearly a review queen?

[00:27:46] Chelsey Donn: You know, I went back and forth on this in my head, but at the end of the day, I really feel like there was some like Jedi mind trick action happening with this review that was like super fascinating to me. And I think things really turned around for me when we talked about, you know, would this be a good thing or a bad thing for the company?

And I really think that Mom of No Rank put this product on the map. You know, she delivered in a way that I think maybe even the company could never have imagined. And clearly we're reading it and, and we see all these disgusting descriptions and we're still sort of tickled by like the prank idea of it all.

So then our likelihood to buy the product is. Dramatically increased from when we read the name of this product and we were both like, ew, disgusting, like now we're on board. So for the Jedi mind trick of it all, I feel like that's a four and a half crown, but I do think that I wish that the humor would have built a little bit more, but mostly super interesting

[00:28:48] Trey Gerrald: yeah, that was fun, good job, thank you, James.

[00:28:51] Chelsey Donn: Thank you so much, James and listeners. Please continue to slide into our DMs and send us reviews. You can also submit a review at any time at ReviewThatReview. com.

[00:29:01] Trey Gerrald: Yes,

[00:29:02] Chelsey Donn: Love that. Well, I think we've done it, Queen. I think we've officially reached the most regal Thanksgiving portion of our show. Trey, who are you inducting for?

Okay.

[00:29:17] VOICEOVER: My Royal Highness

[00:29:19] Trey Gerrald: well, of course, the, um, NSYNC band bug continues, because, as Mommy stated in their review, petty disappointments. Today, I am going to induct this Reddit page, which I don't know anything about Reddit, I'm not like a person on Reddit, but. I was scrolling through Instagram as well and someone posted like a Reddit screenshot about like sticking it to their boss and, and someone in the comments was like, Yes, Queen, we love malicious compliance.

So, okay, so then I went on this whole Reddit thread, Khole, of I guess you call it like it's a Reddit thread called malicious compliance. So it's just people sending in stories of being either the boss who had a malicious compliance story done to them or employees who stick it to their bosses by following rules to the detriment to show the stupidity of the rules.

There's just something about it that is so delicious. There are so So many. I mean, I think it's been a Reddit thread for years and years and years. So there's truly hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of examples. But like, one of them that I thought was really funny that I'll just briefly share is this employer shares all the soap dispensers in like this workplace were empty.

And so they went to like the janitor to be like, hey, they're all empty. You have to fill them. And the janitor was like, that's not my responsibility. It's the nighttime janitor's job. And the person was like, I don't care whose job it is. You are gonna go into the supply closet, find whatever soap there is, and fill them up.

And so what they did, is they took bar soaps, and put bars of soap in all of the things because it wasn't their job. So it's just like delicious because there's so many examples of people doing as they're told

[00:31:19] Chelsey Donn: right like you can't tell me I didn't do what I was supposed

[00:31:22] Trey Gerrald: I mean it's just so delicious and wonderful and I was like cackling like tears coming out of my eyes.

It's just so great. So, in honor of Thanksgiving, specifically, celebrating things that deserve five stars, I just think there's something really fun about taking your power back and being justified and also like being a little bit shady. I love it. Oh God, I love it. I encourage all of you to go. You'll find your own petty disappointments, as mommy put it.

And for that reason, I am inducting Malicious Compliance as this Thanksgiving episode's Royal Highness.

[00:31:59] Chelsey Donn: Wow, I'm definitely going to have to check that

[00:32:02] Trey Gerrald: Does that, like, tickle you? Do you, like, love that sort of shit?

[00:32:05] Chelsey Donn: That totally, yes, of course. It's just like any moment where you feel like there's like sweet redemption that still falls within the realm of like, you didn't kick someone in the face. You didn't do something terrible. And yet you still got that sweet redemption. Chef's kiss.

[00:32:22] Trey Gerrald: I have two examples of where I've done this in life that I'll share on the after show.

[00:32:26] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:32:27] Trey Gerrald: Do you have any examples?

[00:32:28] Chelsey Donn: I'm sure I do. I have to think

about one. But

[00:32:30] Trey Gerrald: cause, I definitely want to talk through it.

[00:32:32] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, for sure.

[00:32:33] Trey Gerrald: Go check it out, everyone. Well, my queen, we did it. The ending of another round on the R U A R Q. Ferris wheel of voodoo dolls with less ill will.

[00:32:45] Chelsey Donn: Yes. Thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please, you know, while you're around the Thanksgiving table, tell a friend, tell a relative.

[00:32:56] Trey Gerrald: And if you didn't like it, go fuck yourself and tell an anime.

[00:33:01] Chelsey Donn: Okay, Trey. So you guys on this week's After Show Pod, we are, I don't even know if I want to say what it is. I guess I'll say what it

[00:33:10] Trey Gerrald: oh, yeah, tease it, tease it.

[00:33:12] Chelsey Donn: Okay, I'll tease it, I'll tease it. We are rating and reviewing a YouTube review, you

[00:33:18] Trey Gerrald: What? Another new source?

[00:33:19] Chelsey Donn: Another new, this is like the Thanksgiving of new sources, truly,

[00:33:25] Trey Gerrald: and from conception conversation of this podcast, you mentioned YouTube reviews, and we've never done it. Here we are 129 episodes later,

[00:33:35] Chelsey Donn: know, isn't that crazy? But we've finally done it and we are reviewing a YouTube review for New Jones Turkey and Gravy Soda,

[00:33:46] Trey Gerrald: what, ew, why

[00:33:47] Chelsey Donn: bleh,

[00:33:48] Trey Gerrald: are all the, why is everything today these weird flavors that shouldn't be things?

[00:33:53] Chelsey Donn: because it's a holiday and we gotta make money, I

[00:33:56] Trey Gerrald: Oh, God. Well, somehow, I can't imagine how, in this conversation, this gets said, and then I eventually had to have a meeting and I had to apologize, which makes my skin crawl every time I fucking think about that today, because, are you fucking kidding me?

[00:34:15] Chelsey Donn: that is crazy.

[00:34:17] VOICEOVER: subscribing.

[00:34:19] Trey Gerrald: begin to conceive of why that was uttered.

[00:34:23] Chelsey Donn: Me neither.

[00:34:25] Trey Gerrald: Well, to all of our royal listeners out there,

[00:34:27] Chelsey Donn: Ignore the haters, you're a queen!

[00:34:30] Trey Gerrald: Gender non specific, Turkey and gravy soda, decomposing June beetle, Queen! Gender non specific Queen, of course.

[00:34:40] Chelsey Donn: That's right. Poor turkeys.

[00:34:49] VOICEOVER: Sign up directly on Apple Podcast to hear our weekly members only after show. Unlock additional benefits when you become a Patreon member@reviewthatreview.com slash patreon. Follow us on all the socials at the review queens and join our mailing list@reviewthatreview.com. Our kvetch line is open 24 7 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.

You never visit, you never write. Give us a al no.

[00:35:14] Chelsey Donn: I feel like we should just take like a quick moment in this outro to just say, you know, an extra special Thanksgiving. Thank you to our listeners, to our Patreon members, and most importantly, to every single person who has written a review that Trey and I have shared on this podcast. Thank you. Thank you.

[00:35:33] Trey Gerrald: I also say we should give a big thank you to people that have left reviews for our

[00:35:37] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. The most thanks for you because that's how people find our show. So if you would be so kind as to do a Thanksgiving gift for Trey and I and leave a five star review on Apple podcasts, that would be much appreciated. Love you, Queens.

[00:35:54] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, do that. Or don't. Or just do it.

[00:35:57] Chelsey Donn: Just do it.

[00:35:58] Trey Gerrald: Okay, I cannot wait to tell you about some of

[00:36:00] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. Yes. I'm like trying to think of mine as we speak, but I'll get there.

[00:36:05] Trey Gerrald: Alright, see you Friday.

[00:36:06] Chelsey Donn: Bye.



Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.


 

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