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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 26: "Hanukkah Special!"



Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 26: "Hanukkah Special!"

Transcription


THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:31] Chelsey Donn: Hi.

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Hi. Hello, everyone. Welcome to Review That Review. The podcast dedicated to reviewing-

[00:00:38] Chelsey Donn: Reviews. That's right. We're just like Siskel & Ebert, only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing, and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:50] Trey Gerrald: That's Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:52] Chelsey Donn: And that's Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:53] Trey Gerrald: And together we are-

[00:00:55] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens.

[00:00:59] Trey Gerrald: But today, is not just any ordinary day. And today we are not just the Review Queens. Today, we are also Dreidel Queens, because it is Hanukkah.

[00:01:11] VOICEOVER: I have a little dreidel. I made it out of clay. And when it's dry and ready, with dreidel I shall play!

[00:01:16] Trey Gerrald: Yay.

[00:01:19] Chelsey Donn: Yay. Gimel, gimel, gimel.

[00:01:23] Trey Gerrald: Chai, chai, chai. No, hey, hey, hey! And tonight, the night that this episode is airing, it is our fourth night of Hanukkah. Chelsey, how's your Hanukkah week going?

[00:01:33] Chelsey Donn: Hanukkah week is great. Um, I mean as you would imagine, there's so much extra light, uh, around to access. Eight days worth of light. So it's good.

[00:01:43] Lodge A Complaint

[00:01:43] Chelsey Donn: And in the spirit of lightness, I just feel like I need to go right into my complaint, if that's okay?

[00:01:44] Trey Gerrald: Yes. Yes, take the floor. Tell us what, what just happened to you over the weekend.

[00:01:44] Chelsey Donn: I want to talk about traveling around the holidays in general, guys. I wanna, I wanna tal- I wanna have this conversation, my queens. So it always is bad traveling around the holiday. Like it just, it feels like it's never easy. I don't know if it's a universal thing. We're constantly being told Mercury is in retrograde and such, but it just feels like around this time specifically, the travel gods, they're angry. There's a lot of people trying to travel at the same time. And things just constantly go wrong. And I went to Colorado over the weekend thinking I'll have a nice weekend. We were delayed five hours going there.

[00:02:36] Trey Gerrald: Ahhh. [laughs].

[00:02:37] Chelsey Donn: I feel like three hours of which were on the plane. I was flying with Goldie, nightmare.

[00:02:43] Trey Gerrald: Oh no.

[00:02:43] Chelsey Donn: And then on the way back, we had to do an emergency landing, which is like never something you wanna hear.

[00:02:49] Trey Gerrald: Mm-mmm [negative].

[00:02:50] Chelsey Donn: See, it doesn't really roll of the tongue. It's not a great thing. It, it's very fear-inducing. So we had to do an emergency landing. I was flying in and out of Burbank for the first time ever. Didn't have such a great experience. No offense to the people that love-

[00:03:03] Trey Gerrald: Bob Hope.

[00:03:03] Chelsey Donn: ... Bob Hope. Okay? I'm not-

[00:03:05] Trey Gerrald: Wait, how far is the flight from Colorado-

[00:03:08] Chelsey Donn: It's not even that far. It's like two and a half hours. It's, it should've been a little nothing. But I was supposed to get into Colorado and have a full day on Friday, and that was completely robbed.

[00:03:18] Trey Gerrald: Ugh.

[00:03:19] Chelsey Donn: And then when we were traveling back... Yeah, emergency landing but at LAX.

[00:03:24] Trey Gerrald: Really?

[00:03:24] Chelsey Donn: Not at Burbank. Yeah, so we got on the ground, they were like, "Hey, guys. Uh, yeah, we're just, we, we are, we had to land at LAX, and we're gonna let you know what's gonna happen in a minute." And we're like, "What's gonna happen? I'm, like, down the street from here."

[00:03:38] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:03:38] Chelsey Donn: "Just let me off the freakin' plane and give me my bags. Like, what, like, what do you need to figure out here?" and they came back on the, the intercom thing-y. And he was, like, "So, we're just gonna fuel up here in Los Angeles at LAX and then we're gonna take off again and go to Burbank." And you're like, "Why do you need to fuel up to go, like, 20 miles? I could drive to Burbank in a shorter amount of time than it would take us to fly there at this point." I ended up getting off the plane 'cause I was like, "Let me off the plane, I wanna-"

[00:04:08] Trey Gerrald: So they did, they let you off?

[00:04:10] Chelsey Donn: They did, but then I needed to deal with, like, the recon from my checked bag, which was a little annoying. And I just had to come back to the airport later, but in a way it was worth it 'cause I just could not-

[00:04:21] Trey Gerrald: No, no.

[00:04:22] Chelsey Donn: ... spend another second on the plane. I had to get off. Goldie wanted to get off. It was time.

[00:04:27] Trey Gerrald: I just looked. Anyone that's not familiar with the map of, California, it's a 22-mile difference between Burbank and LAX.

[00:04:36] Chelsey Donn: Not happy about it.

[00:04:38] Trey Gerrald: That's crazy.

[00:04:39] Chelsey Donn: Who am I complaining to or at? I don't know.

[00:04:43] Trey Gerrald: [laughs].

[00:04:43] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint!

[00:04:44] Trey Gerrald: That is terrible.

[00:04:46] Chelsey Donn: Lengthy complaint lodge. And honestly, at the end of the day, I don't know who to blame. Nothing, nothing is making sense anymore, you guys.

[00:04:53] Trey Gerrald: All right, well I hear, I hear that complaint. There is nothing more frustrating than when you have a set plan and the plan does not get executed correctly for reasons outside of your control. I, that's like such a, um, terrible feeling.

[00:05:09] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. And even karmically, I think you feel like if I had to deal with a delay on the way out, like I'm owed a no delay on the way home, you know?

[00:05:17] Trey Gerrald: Oh, for sure.

[00:05:18] Chelsey Donn: The double, the double whammy was, was really, really made it that much harder to deal with. Anyway, so Trey. I mean, I just, I launched into that without even asking you what-

[00:05:28] Trey Gerrald: [laughs]. No, it's like I understand. That seems very frustrating.

[00:05:31] Chelsey Donn: I just had, I could, I couldn't contain myself. So I wanna, like, take a step back. How was your week? Did you have a good week? I hope. I missed you a lot. And-

[00:05:47] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:05:47] Chelsey Donn: ... have you been, like, percolating about something you wanted to complain about? What's going on?

[00:05:47] Trey Gerrald: I've had a good week. You know, because I was raised Christian but I married a Jewish person, I do celebrate both holidays. And so, you know, traditionally we will see David's family. Uh, his parents for the first few nights of Hanukkah. So it's just a joyous season of gifts, but I do have something I need to complain about.

[00:06:05] Chelsey Donn: Okay, let's hear it.

[00:06:07] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint.

[00:06:08] Trey Gerrald: Okay, so, you know, I was born in the mid-'80s.

[00:06:13] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm [affirmative].

[00:06:13] Trey Gerrald: And there was a very specific fashion to the mid-'80s, and I grew up in the '90s-

[00:06:19] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm [affirmative].

[00:06:19] Trey Gerrald: ... and the early 2000s. Both of which have very distinctive styles.

[00:06:23] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:06:24] Trey Gerrald: So, you know, I was in my 20s in the 2010s, now that we're in the 2020s-

[00:06:31] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm [affirmative].

[00:06:31] Trey Gerrald: ... I'm in my 30s.

[00:06:32] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:06:33] Trey Gerrald: And I am not of that age where I don't understand TikTok. I have no interest.

[00:06:38] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm [affirmative].

[00:06:39] Trey Gerrald: And it has come to my attention that me wearing skinny-ish tight jeans makes me an old person.

[00:06:47] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:06:48] Trey Gerrald: So I'm suddenly in this experience of, "Oh my god, this is the new version of mom jeans."

[00:06:55] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:06:56] Trey Gerrald: The fact, like, young people look at me in my... And I can't even wear skinny jeans becau- just because my, um, I have really ginormous calves, not because of anything I've done, just genetically.

[00:07:06] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:07:07] Trey Gerrald: But I do wear slim jeans.

[00:07:09] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:07:10] Trey Gerrald: And I, I have to, like, now wear baggy jeans.