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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 36: "1-800-Flowers - 1 vs 5 Stars"



Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 36: "1-800-Flowers - 1 vs 5 Stars"

Transcription


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!


THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

RTR 36

[00:00:00] VOICEOVER: [Theme Song]

[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: Hello

[00:00:31] Trey Gerrald: Hi. Hello listeners. Welcome to Review That Review the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:37] Chelsey Donn: reviews! We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:50] Trey Gerrald: that's Chelsley Donn

[00:00:52] Chelsey Donn: And that's Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:53] Trey Gerrald: and together we are.

[00:00:55] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens!

[00:00:59] Trey Gerrald: To show your support for the show and get bonus and exclusive content, including our members only after show podcast. Visit our patreon page at patreon.com/ReviewThatReview Chelsey, happy second week of Febs. How's your week going?

[00:01:16] Chelsey Donn: Thank you. My week's going all right. I feel like I got, I like sometimes when I have a real time complaint to lodge, I just want to lodge right in.

[00:01:26] Trey Gerrald: Are you ready today?

[00:01:27] Chelsey Donn: I think I'm ready today. I haven't even discussed your week and how your week is going.

[00:01:32] Trey Gerrald: Well, let me just say today, this episode comes out on February 9th, which is my father's birthday. He is turning 74. If Chelsey is quick math before the episodes started as correct, then I want to say happy birthday to my dad. I love you very much. Should we all live? So with 74, what a blessing.

[00:01:52] Chelsey Donn: What a blessing. Amen. Happy birthday. Trey's dad. I mean, without your dad, you wouldn't be here and we wouldn't have the show, so we really do owe a debt of gratitude to Trey's dad. So happy birthday.

[00:02:05] Trey Gerrald: That's so nice. All right. So with the gratitude,

[00:02:08] Lodge A Complaint!

[00:02:08] Trey Gerrald: let's just do it. Let's jump in. Chelsey.

[00:02:10] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:02:11] Trey Gerrald: Is there something that you would like to

[00:02:13] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint

[00:02:14] Trey Gerrald: about today?

[00:02:15] Chelsey Donn: There is actually my allergies. You guys are so out of control and I have to lodge a complaint about it because for so many reasons. Okay. One, I love Zyrtec. Zyrtec for me. I actually live by it, but I'm so dependent on it. On the days when I just forget to take it for some reason, I'm a mess. And then I'm sneezing all over the place and it used to be like, I was worried that someone else would think I have COVID or something. Now it's like, I think myself, I have COVID like, it's like, it, it just, my hypochondria gets, you know, Ang set up and so much happens just because I have such bad allergies and I'm so beholden to Zyrtec to get through my everyday life.

[00:03:08] Chelsey Donn: What is this? Have allergies gotten worse? I always just feel like it's like, oh, it's that time of year when everyone's, it's always that time of year for me. Do you have bad allergies?

[00:03:19] Trey Gerrald: I do have seasonal allergies. I'm curious. Okay. This is good. I love that this is your complaint because everyone keep it in your pocket. We'll, find out why later, but I'm curious. What kind of Zyrtec do you take, it's at the little like extended release. That's like a gel or do you do the little like white tab?

[00:03:39] Chelsey Donn: I do the little white tab.

[00:03:40] Trey Gerrald: and that's all you do? Because I alternate the Zyrtec gel with Flonase. Do you ever do the Flonase,

[00:03:50] Chelsey Donn: I hate the smell.

[00:03:51] Trey Gerrald: You can do the sensitive one. It's blue. It doesn't smell the same. And honestly, like, I mean, I recognize part of your complaint is like forgetting. Like if, if you forget a day you're messed up. So I don't know that is.

[00:04:05] Trey Gerrald: I mean, that is unfortunate.

[00:04:08] Chelsey Donn: It is, it is. I mean, I usually do remember, but on the days when I forgot, I'm just like, oh my God, I'm seasoning. And I'm like, oh, I didn't take the Zyrtec today, but I took it right before we got on. So I'm hoping that it'll kick in.

[00:04:23] Trey Gerrald: I think my allergies were worse in the south cause we had pollen, but I really like, I usually get sick when the season changes. That's like pretty consistent. Good complaint. I'm I'm so surprised the allergies haven't come up yet.

[00:04:35] Chelsey Donn: I know. Right. So I just, I hope it doesn't affect my recording today. And if I sound a little stuffed, don't be alarmed. It's just allergies. Okay.

[00:04:45] Trey Gerrald: Thank you so much.

[00:04:48] Chelsey Donn: Trey. What is your complaint?

[00:04:50] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So other end of the spectrum here, I would like to lodge a complaint against something that has literally been sitting in my drafts section of Twitter for like five years. I was trying to find a quippy, funny tweet about it, and then I sort of stopped using Twitter, but I hate in a film, anytime that a character is driving a car because I instantly cannot tell what the scene's about.

[00:05:15] Trey Gerrald: Cause I'm constantly waiting for a car wreck. I'm like, is because they never like look at the road appropriately to when they're actually like, if you were doing it in real life. So I'm constantly. Is this going to be like a shocking moment where they get T-boned at any minute? Like, is something terrible going to happen?

[00:05:33] Trey Gerrald: I, this, this is not a comedy routine. My anxiety, anytime a character is driving goes crazy. And I have to mention, because I did, you know, we're the recording of this is a little earlier than it's coming out. So I did just. Scream, AKA scream five. And another thing that really bugs me is anytime a character opens her refrigerator and the door goes just to the length of the frame.

[00:06:00] Trey Gerrald: So you can't see anytime a refrigerator door opens. I always think someone's going to be standing behind their.

[00:06:07] Chelsey Donn: oh, like someone's gonna,

[00:06:09] Trey Gerrald: It happens with medicine cabinets, cabinets in the kitchen. And anyone opens the door and this new scream, no spoilers, they really make a joke out of that. And it happened several times in one scene and it never results anything. It's actually like really genius, but I hate that too. It's the same with driving a car or opening a door in a movie. I cannot pay attention to the content of the scene because I'm so afraid that I'm about to be terrified. I just want to lodge that complaint. I would love to know if anyone else has this anxiety attack about shocking events coming out of nowhere. Jump scares. It can be a romcom like it terrifies me Chelsey. Have you ever experienced this?

[00:06:49] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. Well, you know that I don't watch anything that might even be remotely classified as a horror movie. So the like only reference to the fridge moment I have is that like Mrs. Doubtfire toodaloo or like, whatever, when. When, yeah. When, uh, Robin Williams comes out with the face covered in, in the icing or whatever, one lump or two.

[00:07:12] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, just pay attention the next time someone's driving. If they're talking to someone in the passenger. I feel like they're making eye contact a little longer than you would in real

[00:07:20] Chelsey Donn: yes, for sure.

[00:07:23] Trey Gerrald: Oy gavelt!. all right, Chelsey. Well, with all of that in mind, should we like shake off, shake Shammy off those complaints and let's, uh, shake off your sinuses and let's go, um, and let's go Head to Head!

[00:07:36] Chelsey Donn: Oh my goodness. I guess that means that today is another versus episode. So without hesitation, I want to get involved. So let's do this.

[00:07:44] Trey Gerrald: Let's..

[00:07:46] VOICEOVER: Assess That Kvetch.

[00:07:48] Trey Gerrald: Yes, Chelsey. You're right. Oh, and all you listeners, you know, cause you can read our title. It has a, another verses episode in honor of Valentine's day coming up today, Chelsey and I are going to both cover a one-star and a five star trust pilot. Review!. On the same topic, any guesses, what's a big, product, especially on Valentine's day... 1-800-Flowers.com

[00:08:18] Chelsey Donn: com that's right. For this versus episode, Trey's selected the five star and I selected the one-star. So to determine who reads first, we got to flip that quarter.

[00:08:30] Trey Gerrald: and I'll call it. Okay.

[00:08:32] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:08:34] Trey Gerrald: It's tales. I feel like this keeps happening to me. I haven't read first.

[00:08:39] Chelsey Donn: I know, but I was on a losing streak for a while too. So it happens. All right. I guess that means I'm going first.

[00:08:44] Trey Gerrald: That means we'll hear the one star Trustpilot Review! first, but before we do, let's just get a little background info on 1-800-Flowers.com. So 1-800-Flowers.com, Inc is obviously, maybe not obviously. A floral and food gift, retailer and distribution company in the us, the company's focus except for mother's day.

[00:09:08] Trey Gerrald: And Valentine's day is on gift baskets, which I did not know. And they also use the name 1-800-Baskets.com. I had no clue, but I found this out on the internet, but wait a gift basket. That's so cute. So, okay.

[00:09:26] Chelsey Donn: who thinks about that? When they think about 1-800-Flowers.com honestly.

[00:09:30] Trey Gerrald: Maybe people that are like a little bit generationally older than us. I feel like gift baskets, like something about that feels very like fifties to me. I don't know why.

[00:09:40] Chelsey Donn: get that. Yeah.

[00:09:42] Trey Gerrald: In my personal opinion, I feel like edible arrangements like destroyed gift baskets, but maybe that's not true. I feel like they're like high end gift, whatever,

[00:09:51] Chelsey Donn: we shouldn't send your dad a gift basket from 1-800-Baskets.com for his birthday, just saying.

[00:09:57] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I w okay. All right. I love that. Okay. So there are 31,861 reviews for 1-800-Flowers.com on Trustpilot with an average score of 2.9. So that means the breakdown. 37% of those are five star reviews and then 35% are one star reviews

[00:10:25] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay.

[00:10:26] Trey Gerrald: pretty close, right?

[00:10:28] Chelsey Donn: That is, that's a very close call. That's like a lot of, that's kind of a tall order for us. Cause we're, we're almost like the tie breaker here.

[00:10:34] Trey Gerrald: I know. So with all of that background info, Chelsey, I think it's time for us to get into this versus battle. Woo.

[00:10:43] Chelsey Donn: so ready. Let's do it.

[00:10:46] 1-800-Flowers 1 Star Review

[00:10:46] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:10:50] Chelsey Donn: All right. So this review is a one star review for 1-800-Flowers.com from Trustpilot. It is written by Marco F

[00:11:03] Trey Gerrald: Okay.

[00:11:04] Chelsey Donn: the subject is, 'first wedding anniversary on Tue', T U E like Tuesday.

[00:11:13] Chelsey Donn: Okay. First line...

[00:11:15] Chelsey Donn: FIrst wedding anniversary on Tuesday. Ordered a plant roses, mixed pink and yellow symbol of union of the two hearts compliment day with two heart-shaped bamboo.

[00:11:33] Chelsey Donn: The Friday night, they call me saying the order is not available for delivery, really waiting Friday to tell me that. I write two emails that night asking to cancel the order. The order is not canceled. Saturday morning, I keep emailing back and forth. They try to sell me other things instead after quote 11 emails and quote calls, we settle for an order of two large rose plants, one yellow, one pink. To be sure. I email them two times asking for confirmation and call them once more because they are completely incapable of answering a straight question. So the emails were useless and the phone call took 15 minutes for them. Just to say, quote, yes, you are Good. end quote. Fast forward to Monday evening, I receive a notification that my order was shipped and dot dot dot dot. Guess what? dot dot dot. It only contains a yellow rose plan dot dot dot dot Really? After all of that? 13 emails in total and three calls. Great. Let's call them once more. dot dot dot dot dot dot. Operator cannot find any trace of pink roses in the system. And by the way, the order of bamboos that they had canceled is actually still there for some puzzling reason, active, but not shipped.

[00:13:20] Chelsey Donn: She takes 15 minutes to figure out that a pink rose was there and now it was not. I asked for a full refund. 10 minutes of negotiations later I give up, she gets me a half refund and ships, a pink rose plan of a different type, smaller bunch and ugly vase for the day after the anniversary. Wednesday 17.

[00:13:52] Chelsey Donn: She offers to call my wife and personally apologize. I say, you might have to beg, face to the ground, for her not to eat you alive. And yet maybe she will have eaten enough of me that she would not be able to eat anyone else. Anyways. Thank you so much. 1-800-GARBAGE service. Seriously. 13 emails. And four phone calls and they still got it messed up.

[00:14:26] Chelsey Donn: Not even one of the email nor one of the calls was conclusive or informative or straight out. Correct? Dear. Gosh, never, ever again. Do not even think about it. If you care for your recipient.

[00:14:45] Trey Gerrald: Mmmm, Marco.

[00:14:50] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Yeah. Marco was just trying to do right by his wife. Who's apparently gonna eat him for dinner now.

[00:14:56] Trey Gerrald: I mean, I have a note about that. Like this is for the first wedding anniversary and they're like speaking that disparaging about their wife's temper.

[00:15:05] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. It's a little, little bit of a red flag. Yeah.

[00:15:08] Trey Gerrald: Wait, was it ever said upfront when Marco placed the order? I know that they canceled it or whatever on Friday for the

[00:15:18] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, they didn't say when they placed the order, but they made it seem like the Friday before the Tuesday was really late for them to be contacting. So I assume at least Monday, but again, that's all an assumption. I have no idea.

[00:15:32] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Cause that don't, you feel like that is an important point. I mean, I'm wondering if it's excluded because they literally placed the order on Thursday. And then, because I feel like the local florists is going to like verify. I mean, who knows this is all assumptions, but just found that missing piece to be interesting.

[00:15:49] Chelsey Donn: Okay. noted.

[00:15:51] Trey Gerrald: I have never heard of this color combo, having a meaning pink and yellow

[00:15:56] Chelsey Donn: I haven't heard of that either, but apparently it's a symbol of the union of two hearts. I have, I

[00:16:01] Trey Gerrald: wonder what tradition that is.

[00:16:03] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I don't know. I that's, I I'd never heard that before reading this Review! either, but I do assume that that's a thing. I wonder if you know how sometimes when you go on 1-800-Flowers, they have like collection put together and then in the description they're like, this is the symbol of the union of two hearts.

[00:16:19] Chelsey Donn: Like maybe that was their thing. I don't know. Just the

[00:16:23] Trey Gerrald: If that's true, that makes me even more on Marco side

[00:16:28] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:16:28] Trey Gerrald: that they're like pushing the meaning and then it's not available and that it is available and it's not available. And then it hasn't, it's not, and you've done

[00:16:35] Chelsey Donn: Right. Yeah. I mean, I, it I'm leaning that way only because they talk about like the two heart-shaped bamboo thing. And then when they got the order sort of straightened out and they're like, fine, I'll just take a rose plant. Like, you know, got it down to what they wanted. They were like, okay, don't include the stupid bamboo.

[00:16:51] Chelsey Donn: I never wanted this stupid bamboo to begin with. And then they're like, and then the bamboo was still there. The spelling and grammar is not great. I don't know if you could notice, there were bunch of times where Marco said, you know, the yellow rose plan instead of plant,

[00:17:07] Trey Gerrald: Yes. I wrote that down.

[00:17:08] Chelsey Donn: I don't know if Trustpilot doesn't allow quotations, every time they wrote a quote, it was like ampersand, Q U O T.

[00:17:18] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. It's really annoying.

[00:17:19] Trey Gerrald: That's so weird. Right? It's everything on Trustpilot. That's a huge flaw.

[00:17:25] Chelsey Donn: like crazy that that would be something that is across the board and they wouldn't fix that. So I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna count that against Marco, but it did make it a little bit hard to read the grammar in those situations because, you know, I don't know how exactly they, formatted that a lot of like lowercase letters, a lot of dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, like a random amount of dots as a Lipsey.

[00:17:48] Chelsey Donn: Is that kind of thing.

[00:17:49] Trey Gerrald: I do want to just point out the quote unquote, ugly vase. I think that is so funny to me, there is something so specific about the vaseware from 1-800-Flowers like that, I, that just truly tickled me. I think that was the funniest part of the Review! to me, because the instant, I heard that my mind perfectly painted what it would be.

[00:18:11] Chelsey Donn: the VA's look like. Yeah. I know. I, sometimes they are really

[00:18:16] Trey Gerrald: Yes. But sometimes they're all. I mean, I bet if I counted the amount of vases in our.

[00:18:21] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:18:22] Trey Gerrald: of them are from 1-800-Flowers. So they're not

[00:18:24] Trey Gerrald: always but it's just

[00:18:25] Chelsey Donn: I always opt to do a Mason jar if that's an option. Cause I'm at least like, yes, it's like of a certain ilk, but it won't be a heinous ugly vase and you can drink out of it. I don't know.

[00:18:39] Trey Gerrald: I mean, I do want to say. At first, when we were going into like the 11 emails, then it was like more than, and the calls, like I started to think like, Marco might be a Karen, but then I sorta thought like, okay, the first thing I want to point out here is I think of 1-800-Flowers as like gifts for someone not necessarily like for my own things, like my own anniversary.

[00:19:06] Trey Gerrald: I probably, I think I would go with a local florist. I feel. Even when I buy flowers, like if, when David was acting and doing opening, I guess sometimes I would do 1-800, but I usually try to find a local florist,

[00:19:21] Chelsey Donn: I think that this is like a rookie mistake for Marco. Cause this is Marco's first anniversary. I don't think there's any way that he would do this in the future. I think that's exactly why he S you know, when they contacted him the Friday night before he was like, just canceled the order.

[00:19:38] Chelsey Donn: Because at that point he was like, I'll go to a local florist. I'll, get my own flowers. I don't want to have to worry about. Them arriving late. And then in regards to Marco being like, a Ken, I just think at the end of the day, the flowers arrived after the anniversary, as a Review Queen and my responsibility for the week being to look through the one-star reviews, there were a lot of one star reviews that mentioned.

[00:20:05] Chelsey Donn: I had this particular, I had a funeral. I had, I had an event that it was very important that the flowers arrive on time. So I planned accordingly on my end, called them, did all this stuff to make sure that things would go off without a hitch. And then they were late.

[00:20:21] Chelsey Donn: This is a common theme. I don't think that Marco is alone in putting his trust into 1-800-Flowers.com

[00:20:30] Trey Gerrald: Well,

[00:20:30] Chelsey Donn: and then being disappointed. And I think that I would be very pissed if I had a particular event that I was aiming for and it arrived after that event.

[00:20:43] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I think that ultimately I'm siding with Marco on this. It's so frustrating to not be able to just get one person that can give you the answer. But I do think that part of the business model of 1-800-Flowers is that they take the order and they send it to local Florist. Fulfillment Places. So sometimes have to change and et cetera.

[00:21:04] Trey Gerrald: But like so many things happened to Marco in this that is horrifying. So that's making, and I do think that Marco has being truthful. I definitely think they like intentionally listed everything verbatim because it's truthful and so insane. now I'm wondering, I mean, you're pointing to so many of the one stars highlight. This is pretty common that the timeliness and that's horrifying.

[00:21:31] Chelsey Donn: Horrifying. Yeah, totally. What do we think about this last person that Marco got on the phone? Who offered to call the wife?

[00:21:40] Trey Gerrald: So

[00:21:40] Chelsey Donn: say and apologize.

[00:21:43] Trey Gerrald: I mean, that's why.

[00:21:44] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:21:45] Trey Gerrald: guess my question is like, why wasn't that person able to do a full refund at that point? Like, no, I don't want you to call my wife. I want a full refund get real.

[00:21:56] Chelsey Donn: but yeah,

[00:21:57] Trey Gerrald: on an altered plan from what I originally wanted. Like, this is insane, you know?

[00:22:01] Chelsey Donn: I just wonder how much the hands of the customer service person are tied. Like maybe they're really not allowed to do that. Like I would think at this point, if they could do it, they would have, if they're going to go out of their way to call the wife,

[00:22:16] Trey Gerrald: okay. How are you feeling about the impact of this review? Do you think that you'll think of 1-800-Flowers, a different way from reading Marco's experience?

[00:22:25] Chelsey Donn: I mean, I have to be honest, there's another service. That's similar to 1-800-FLOWERS. I won't like pimp them here because not an ad. I was already using them instead of 1-800-Flowers prior to this deep dive. But after reading. It really was impactful for me. Like we're supposed to look at this obviously in a vacuum, but seeing the other reviews too, that were of the same ilk really made me feel like, hell no, am I going to use that?

[00:22:52] Chelsey Donn: Not I'm never going to use them. I would never recommend, you know, my friends use them. I just think that it's too big of a risk

[00:22:59] Trey Gerrald: That's so funny. Cause I also have to take my bias out because I do use 1-800-Flowers. Did I pick this or did you

[00:23:05] Chelsey Donn: I, I think I did.

[00:23:07] Trey Gerrald: oh yeah, I was going to say, um,

[00:23:09] Chelsey Donn: because it is the top. I mean, still I use another company, but you think about, yes, it's It's one that's been around the longest. I I think as long as the internet or probably before that,

[00:23:22] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, it was.

[00:23:25] Chelsey Donn: You know,

[00:23:26] Trey Gerrald: it is funny to me because I read the Five Stars so I need to that out. And I generally have a positive experience of this company, but I am having an impact. And you know, I think could crown this. I, oh, I do want to say the dear. Gosh, got funny to me. Like if we're subbing the word God for gosh, funny to keep dear God.

[00:23:50] Chelsey Donn: dear. Gosh.

[00:23:53] Trey Gerrald: And then 1-800-GARBAGE service is really funny.

[00:23:57] Chelsey Donn: I agree. I did got a chuckle. I think that that Marco was going for a couple of labs, which, you know, I mean, eat a live thing was a little, was a little far and, and made me a bit concerned about his marriage, but I did appreciate the reach for the humor.

[00:24:11] Trey Gerrald: 'cause you said that I I'll respond. I was going to do it in my Assess, but I was wondering if Marco was going so hard about the wife in order to like, get that refund or if it is actual, who knows. All right, so let's, let's crown it. You ready to crown

[00:24:27] Chelsey Donn: Yes. I'm ready.

[00:24:28] Trey Gerrald: All right. So Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards and in an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.

[00:24:40] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating.

[00:24:48] Chelsey Donn: Oh, wow. Very interesting. So I'm holding up three and a half. Crowns. Trey is holding up four and a half crowns, Trey. Why four and a half crowns for Marco.

[00:24:57] Trey Gerrald: Because I have a very positive experience of this company. I have had one disastrous horrifying appalling experience, but that's one out of many, many, many purchases, but so I really, I just think the lack of being able to solve it in One, communication is a huge deal breaker. The fact that it didn't even cut, like it came today.

[00:25:21] Trey Gerrald: No, absolutely not. So I took off a half crown because the spelling was so bad and the grammar was a problem. But other than that, I was entertained. I laughed. I think it could be. I mean, I think this is, could be common. I think Marco was truthful and I think it's valuable. I, you know, it might have an impression on me the next time I'm ordering.

[00:25:41] Trey Gerrald: So that's why I did four and a half. Why did you do three and a half?

[00:25:44] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Maybe I was a little harsh on Marco. I mostly did it for the spelling and grammar and a lot. I mean, some of us. Their fault, but there were so much within the Review! of like the ampersand quote, it was a little bit hard to read based on the way that Marco voted. And that was really why he took the one and a half crowns off.

[00:26:06] Chelsey Donn: I thought that there was humor here. I thought I believe the situation and. I was impacted. So maybe I should've gotten four, but I felt three and a half was appropriate for Marco based on just the, I guess the difficulty of the read, you know, upon first glance on the website. So that was my three and a half for me.

[00:26:27] Trey Gerrald: All right. That was fun. Wow. Poor Marco. I hope that Marco and their wife, I hope that they made it to their second anniversary.

[00:26:37] Chelsey Donn: I do too. And I hope that they went with a local florist, you know,

[00:26:40] Trey Gerrald: All right. Well, let's take a quick break. And when we come back, we will hear a completely different side of the story. A more positive version. When you hear my five star review.

[00:26:51] Chelsey Donn: can't wait.

[00:26:52] Trey Gerrald: BRB.

[00:26:55] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown. We'll be right back.

[00:27:25] Meryl Go Round[00:27:25] Ad Break

[00:27:25] Trey Gerrald: It's time to take a little spin on the Meryl-Go-Round.

[00:27:31] VOICEOVER: 'I don't feel like an icon. Most of the days, I feel like 'I can't!' That's with an, A'..

[00:27:40] Chelsey Donn: All right. Here's the deal. Trey and I have each picked a rotten scathing, pithy One-Star-Zinger and with 30 seconds on the clock, we'll take turns, trying to recite the zinger in as many genres as possible.

[00:27:53] Trey Gerrald: just like queen Meryl Streep, who does it all.

[00:27:56] Chelsey Donn: Before the clock runs out. All right. Trey you're first, today. Where is your zinger from?

[00:28:01] Trey Gerrald: All right. So today my One-Star-Zinger is from Good 'ol, amazon.com and I picked the Reese's milk chocolate, peanut butter hearts, candy

[00:28:12] Chelsey Donn: Oh, yum.

[00:28:13] Trey Gerrald: Valentine's day 16 ounces, one count,

[00:28:16] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:28:18] Trey Gerrald: and my Review! is written by. Chad G and Chad G says too thick to eat. That's the subject. And then the Review! is actually a little different.

[00:28:33] Trey Gerrald: The Review! is

[00:28:34] Chelsey Donn: Oh,

[00:28:34] Trey Gerrald: way too thick to eat

[00:28:39] Chelsey Donn: oh

[00:28:39] Trey Gerrald: too is spelled wrong. And that insane. So way too thick. Two weeks.

[00:28:45] Chelsey Donn: I'm going to strap you in. Okay. So there's a bouquet picture it. Okay. And there are 11 red roses and then there's a, you, so like you're the 12th. You're the 12th of the dozen.

[00:28:59] Trey Gerrald: that makes me think of American beauty.

[00:29:01] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:29:01] Trey Gerrald: All right, I'm ready.

[00:29:03] Chelsey Donn: All right. Let's do it.

[00:29:05] Trey Gerrald: All right.

[00:29:06] VOICEOVER: Three, Two, One, GO!.

[00:29:10] Chelsey Donn: Melodrama. WWE game show soap, opera

[00:29:26] Trey Gerrald: oh,

[00:29:27] Chelsey Donn: horror,

[00:29:28] Trey Gerrald: wait.

[00:29:32] Chelsey Donn: AHPRA, diva, lifetime. Oh

[00:29:40] Trey Gerrald: lot of those were very same.

[00:29:42] Chelsey Donn: seven. Trey job. That was a good round. I think maybe those dozen roses were lucky for you.

[00:29:52] Trey Gerrald: Right. Just me in the middle. So Chelsey, what is your One-Star-Zinger today?

[00:29:56] Chelsey Donn: My One-Star-Zinger is also from our favorite Amazon.

[00:30:02] Trey Gerrald: Ooh.

[00:30:03] Chelsey Donn: It is for Hala bears, original shawty. You fine. 10 inch authentic Teddy bear. Funny Valentine's day plush gift for the girlfriend, wife, boyfriend, husband, or best friend.

[00:30:23] VOICEOVER: Supercalifragilistic XP.

[00:30:27] Trey Gerrald: Those key words, man. All

[00:30:28] Chelsey Donn: I know it's actually really cute. It's like a giant bear and it's holding a heart and the heart says shoddy, you shawty you.

[00:30:40] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Okay. And it says, shoddy, you find a shit though.

[00:30:44] Trey Gerrald: They spell it out as HRT

[00:30:46] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. All right. Um,

[00:30:50] Trey Gerrald: that for my church group.

[00:30:52] Chelsey Donn: I know, right. But anyway, so this is a one-star review written by Shaquila C. The subject is careless and the Review! is the Bear is missing an eye. ugh.

[00:31:10] Trey Gerrald: Oh, my gosh. That is pretty careless.

[00:31:14] Chelsey Donn: bad. Oh, are you fine as hell? But you missing an eye, you know?

[00:31:20] Trey Gerrald: don't need an iPad. Shoddy.

[00:31:22] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:31:23] Trey Gerrald: All right. So today I'm going to strap you into a chocolate assorted Valentine's day, heart classic. If a monster comes, you can throw one of those that you don't want to eat. Like the coconut eat thingys. All right. Are you ready?

[00:31:35] Chelsey Donn: I am ready.

[00:31:37] VOICEOVER: Three, Two, One, GO!.

[00:31:44] Chelsey Donn: Oh,

[00:31:50] Trey Gerrald: Pop's. Oh, Disney,

[00:31:59] Chelsey Donn: oh,

[00:32:07] Trey Gerrald: breaking news

[00:32:08] Chelsey Donn: best.

[00:32:08] Trey Gerrald: two, four, six. So that

[00:32:18] Chelsey Donn: You're the big winner on the Valentine's day. Meryl-Go-Round Malo. Mazal.

[00:32:23] Trey Gerrald: Thank you. That was fun.

[00:32:24] Chelsey Donn: was fun.

[00:32:27] 1-800-Flowers 5 Star Review

[00:32:27] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:32:31] Chelsey Donn: All right. We are back from that rousing game break and it is RQ Ts turn.

[00:32:38] Trey Gerrald: So today I was tasked with the responsibility of finding a five-star review.

[00:32:44] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:32:44] Trey Gerrald: For 1-800-FLOWERS. And today I will be reading you David R's five star review from Trustpilot for 1-800-Flowers.com. David R's subject is I'm a regular customer and have been dot dot dot and here's the Review!.

[00:33:05] Trey Gerrald: I am a regular customer and have been for years, I find ordering is straightforward and I use PayPal or my debit card to order and have never had any ordering issues. I've only had one order with a problem. And that was the fault of the local florist. There was a substitution that changed the whole look of the arrangement. The 1-800-FLOWERS staff took my complaint and concerns seriously and had the local florist remake, the arrangement. And my sister, the recipient was very happy with it.

[00:33:40] Trey Gerrald: The 1-800-FLOWERS staff did not stop there. They gave me two $25 coupons to use on future orders. I was not expecting anything and it was a total surprise. The order was less than $50 to begin with. So they made $0 on my order. This company is a class act and you can trust them to get your order out and address any issues along the way!

[00:34:12] Chelsey Donn: Interesting.

[00:34:13] Trey Gerrald: lacking of a personality in my opinion,

[00:34:15] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that was the one thing that was coming to me. Like, you know how sometimes we talk about buzzwords and how I search reviews for certain words. This was one of those reviews where I felt like they're like trustworthy check.

[00:34:28] Trey Gerrald: straightforward.

[00:34:29] Chelsey Donn: Straightforward check like coupon, there are just like words in it that felt very key wordy to me.

[00:34:37] Chelsey Donn: I wish that like, yes, they talked about the sister experience, you know, which, okay. That was an example. I don't know. There was something a little bit unpersonal. Unpersonable

[00:34:49] Trey Gerrald: And I will tell you. That on Trustpilot underneath the five stars. And before the subject, there is a gray word with a little circle check and it says invited.

[00:35:03] Chelsey Donn: Oh,

[00:35:04] Trey Gerrald: R was invited leave a trust pilot Review!, which is interesting.

[00:35:09] Chelsey Donn: me trust him last. Cause it, well, you know, it almost, it makes you wonder, like, were they giving him these

[00:35:17] Trey Gerrald: coupons for that.

[00:35:19] Chelsey Donn: for the Review!. I bet you they're giving, well, a couple of questions One, I bet you they're giving David R the two coupons because he's a frequent customer.

[00:35:30] Chelsey Donn: And because they're like, you know, I better do something if I want to retain this customer. So it makes me wonder. Yeah, it seems like in the last reviewer was a first time user, so maybe they care less or maybe they, I don't know when was this Review!

[00:35:45] Chelsey Donn: written.

[00:35:45] Trey Gerrald: December 13th, 2020,

[00:35:48] Chelsey Donn: Oh, interesting. So very similar time period. Okay. Yeah, because I was wondering about that the customer service experience that David has is so vastly different from the customer service experience that Marco did.

[00:36:03] Trey Gerrald: I mean, it didn't even occur to me that this might be like a coerced or an encouraged or a fake possible. I mean, the invited, I didn't even really read into because a lot of the five-star reviews have this invited situation, which is

[00:36:21] Chelsey Donn: I don't know that that's a coincidence.

[00:36:23] Trey Gerrald: but I'm also noticing along this line, the spelling and grammar is like, perfect.

[00:36:30] Trey Gerrald: only thing I could say is wrong is that PayPal capitalized both peas, but it's two words, which I actually think PayPal

[00:36:38] Chelsey Donn: One word,

[00:36:39] Trey Gerrald: And every time they say 1-800-FLOWERS, it's an all caps, but it's not, it's like one word. They don't have the dashes.

[00:36:47] Chelsey Donn: I wonder if that's an SEO thing.

[00:36:49] Trey Gerrald: I mean, I'm wondering if maybe this is I'm wondering.

[00:36:52] Trey Gerrald: Oh, and David, only has one Review! on Trustpilot and

[00:36:57] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, this

[00:36:58] Trey Gerrald: I didn't read into any of this before.

[00:37:02] Chelsey Donn: suspicious. I feels very general.

[00:37:05] Trey Gerrald: And to like full disclosure, everyone. I had a very challenging time finding a five star review that had any meat on the bones, the majority of the five stars. And there, you know, there's 35%.

[00:37:19] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:37:19] Trey Gerrald: Are five-star, but people are not verbose and their gratitude or pleasantries in their five-star,

[00:37:27] Chelsey Donn: Which is yeah. Taling and also kind of a good point. If you're noticing that a large portion of those were invited, then you know, if you're invited to write a review and it's like, okay, sorry, you had a bad experience. I'll throw a few coupons your way in exchange for this. Review!. You're doing it in an obligatory fashion.

[00:37:48] Chelsey Donn: You're probably not gonna go to town.

[00:37:51] Trey Gerrald: Correct. That's true too. Yeah, that's true. I mean, it's interesting just going down our normal roster here. I think we're thinking it might be a little shady, not so truthful. The common experience.

[00:38:03] Chelsey Donn: I

[00:38:03] Trey Gerrald: don't know.

[00:38:05] Chelsey Donn: I mean, the only thing that I think is common that, you know, you brought up in the last assessment. If somebody didn't realize like, oh, they're going to outsource to the local Flores. That's something I learned, but at the time, like, I don't know. I feel like I'm a hypocrite sometimes because when I, when people have good customer service experiences and they work it out, I do like when they give five star, but at the same time, I'm like you had a Fiserv.

[00:38:31] Chelsey Donn: You, you talked about a negative experience, I guess they did fix it, but it's still a negative. So it doesn't feel like this is quite a five star, but I don't know. What do you think about.

[00:38:42] Trey Gerrald: I mean, it does make me think of Marco. Like I wish they had given Marco a couple of coupons

[00:38:48] Chelsey Donn: But if they had, I feel like Marco's Review! would have still been like three stars, four star, you know what I mean? Like, so there is something about the fact that if David R was such a valid user of 1-800-Flowers for so long, and they were so passionate about how trustworthy they were, et cetera, et cetera.

[00:39:10] Chelsey Donn: Why didn't they write Review! at a Review! years ago? You know why now?

[00:39:15] Trey Gerrald: Right. Well, I mean, this is, we only looked at Trustpilot, but I mean, it does make me question because the last sentence, the conclusion is like, they'll address any issue along the way, which is exact opposite of experience. And then again, with personality, the humor, there's no humor and, and I wasn't even very entertaining.

[00:39:34] Trey Gerrald: I feel like this is a first and I didn't even register this. When I picked up, I just liked that David mentions they've been using them for a long time, that there was an issue and they like went above and beyond. But now I'm starting to wonder if it's fake.

[00:39:47] Chelsey Donn: I know.

[00:39:48] Trey Gerrald: I, then I don't even know if, what the impact for, I mean, this brings up an interesting point that I think pay for play.

[00:39:55] Trey Gerrald: Like if. invited, like, does that negate, like, I kind of feel like it's influencing a positive review, but I know so many companies do that, so, maybe this will go into my crowning, it kind of makes it not valuable to me.

[00:40:11] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I mean, especially in a sea of, of one star reviews, you know,

[00:40:17] Trey Gerrald: So like once again, though, like we maybe are creating that it's fake or that it's a coerced. We don't have complete proof of that. So

[00:40:28] Chelsey Donn: have complete proof though. That's the thing is like, all we can do as Review! Queens is sort of look at the information as it lies. I feel like the fact that they were asked to write this Review! the writing at when they're writing it, they're talking about sort of these buzzword things.

[00:40:45] Chelsey Donn: It's ringing a little shady to me. So I think that were warranted in that response.

[00:40:50] Trey Gerrald: I think, I think I can

[00:40:51] Chelsey Donn: I can crown I can crown David.

[00:40:53] Trey Gerrald: All right, let's do a.

[00:40:55] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating.

[00:41:02] Chelsey Donn: Okay. I am holding up one. Crown tray is holding up two crowns. I gave David R one crown for everything that we've mentioned thus far, I just don't really trust them. I also don't really know what I'm supposed to gather. From this Review! for some reason, because I mean, we have the sister storyline, which is maybe even where the one crown is coming from, but outside of that, they didn't talk about the polity of the flowers at all.

[00:41:28] Chelsey Donn: They really didn't talk about, the product or anything that I feel like I could really take away and be like, Ooh, that sounds like an amazing experience. And I just gotta hop on 1-800-Flowers right now and, and get some flowers. So for that reason, not that impactful overall one crown for me, why two from you trey.

[00:41:47] Trey Gerrald: I did too, just to be fair because I do think, and it makes me think both realities could be true. almost as if David is leaving a review for someone that has never interacted online shopping before, because it's like I use PayPal or my debit and they took my it's my concerns here. And they replaced it.

[00:42:07] Trey Gerrald: And I got like, it's so rudimentary that maybe it could be real, but that also really makes me think that it maybe isn't real, but I went with Two, because I'm really questioning of this is like a coerced five-star, but it did get me. Cause I didn't realize that until we were recording this. I really felt like this was a great five-star review.

[00:42:29] Trey Gerrald: I mean, the spelling is impeccable and it pops out. I mean, they use all caps for the name of the company only. I mean, now I'm really is shady, but that's why I

[00:42:39] Chelsey Donn: I mean, yeah. I mean, I think that's an interesting point that you just brought up, like, if this was a Review That, that David was asked to write, maybe David's older. Maybe David's not somebody that writes online reviews all the time. So I think that, that is an interesting point. I see where you're coming from.

[00:42:58] BONUS 5 STAR!

[00:42:58] Trey Gerrald: I have a quick little surprise. I have found this five-star with that I'm seeing now is also invited,

[00:43:06] Chelsey Donn: And see, this is very interesting. 1-800-FLOWERS.

[00:43:09] Trey Gerrald: like a zinger, but I am actually realizing there might be a whole different context, but, okay. So this is a five star written by Robyn O. Robyn is spelled with a Y.

[00:43:21] Chelsey Donn: Well that.

[00:43:21] Trey Gerrald: The subject is I placed the order doesn't get delivered until next week.

[00:43:27] Trey Gerrald: And the Review is I placed the order.

[00:43:32] Chelsey Donn: Wait, that's the whole Review!

[00:43:34] Trey Gerrald: Yes. And this date is also December 13th, 2020. So I wonder if everyone just got an email that was like, please leave a review and get a 20% off coupon or something.

[00:43:48] Chelsey Donn: even more shady.

[00:43:50] Trey Gerrald: I'm thinking, cause Robin says I placed the order, but it doesn't get delivered until next week. So I can't leave a review. Like it looked funny to me, which is why I wanted to read it.

[00:44:00] Trey Gerrald: Cause it's like I placed the order, but I'm wondering.

[00:44:03] Chelsey Donn: you're right. It's like if 1-800-Flowers send out a email blast to all the people that have bought from them in the past or something, and they were like, you know, use this code and write a review by XYZ date.

[00:44:17] Trey Gerrald: luck Chelsey on the website, it says business transparency. This is on Trustpilot claimed their Trustpilot profile on February, 2020. So I, it seems like Trustpilot, didn't verify until 2020, so they probably were encouraging customers to leave reviews. So I think we might be right.

[00:44:41] Chelsey Donn: What, what do you mean claim? like the Trustpilot page itself

[00:44:45] Trey Gerrald: What's claimed by 1-800-FLOWERS.

[00:44:47] Chelsey Donn: Oh, got

[00:44:48] Trey Gerrald: So maybe they were trying to ramp up the amount of reviews they were getting.

[00:44:53] Chelsey Donn: Right. Like maybe like they worked with a new marketing person and they were like, do you know that your, you have like two stars on Trustpilot and they were trying to get that number up. So they claimed it and then started inviting people to leave. That makes

[00:45:06] Trey Gerrald: because yours was 2020 as well.

[00:45:09] Chelsey Donn: It was

[00:45:10] Trey Gerrald: And all of these five stars are in the same date, so, oh, oh, I hate.

[00:45:17] Chelsey Donn: really shady.

[00:45:19] Trey Gerrald: of hate that this is happening because like, this does not look good for 1-800-Flowers.

[00:45:24] Chelsey Donn: I'm sorry. 1-800-FLOWERS. Yeah. I mean like, okay. How do we zoom out from this a little bad.

[00:45:29] Trey Gerrald: I mean, it's responsible of them to claim the profile. And I look, if I owned a business, I would be encouraging people to leave reviews too, because a squeaky wheel gets the grease, you know, I think

[00:45:41] Chelsey Donn: And also, I, I think that the hard thing about online reviews, which you and I both know is. You know, here you are tray of Review Queen who has had several positive experiences on 1-800-Flowers.com and you're not running to Trustpilot write a review. So 1-800-FLOWERS has been around for a long time.

[00:46:04] Chelsey Donn: I'm not willing to write off the company based off of these few reviews,

[00:46:09] Trey Gerrald: I think this is just information that like a lot of times they are outsourcing to local florists. So you, so like, it is maybe a bit of a game. And maybe it's more of a gamble than going directly, but it is much more appropriate if you live in one state and you're sending across the country. Like I mean, I think that's what I use it for. It's like really excels at that. You just don't really know the quality I mean, I don't

[00:46:37] Chelsey Donn: Yep. Yeah, sometimes you gotta roll the dice. You know what I'm, I'm super curious about listeners. If you have used 1-800-Flowers.com and you have an opinion about it, call up our voicemail box 1-850-REVIEW-0, and let us know. Do you want to defend 1-800-FLOWERS? Have you had a positive experience that you could detail for us a little bit better?

[00:47:00] Chelsey Donn: You know, then David R did so. Give us a call because we want to hear all sides of the story. Unfortunately, we're going to walk away from today's assessment, having a little bit of a, a bitter taste in our mouth. And I'll end a bit of a question mark, for sure.

[00:47:16] Trey Gerrald: Well, Chelsey, you deserve a bouquet happy Valentine's Day

[00:47:21] Chelsey Donn: Oh, thank you. Thank you so

[00:47:23] Trey Gerrald: You deserve 11 roses with me as to 12.

[00:47:27] Chelsey Donn: yeah. Oh my God. Yes, please.

[00:47:29] My Royal Highness

[00:47:29] Trey Gerrald: Alright, am I queen? So we have done it here we are. We've reached the most Regal portion of our show. Chelsey. Who are you inducting today for?

[00:47:39] VOICEOVER: My Royal Highness

[00:47:41] Chelsey Donn: All right. So I know that this is a little bit late. This episode is going to air in a couple of weeks, but I just wanted to give My Royal Highness to Bob Saget. I just, I feel I've been so full climbed about this for awhile. I grew up with Bob Saget being such a part of my childhood. I was a huge Full House fan.

[00:48:02] Chelsey Donn: I watched it every day. Danny Tanner was a part of, so many of our houses. You know, for us, the kids, who grew up in the nineties, I followed him on Instagram. I follow his wife, Kelly on Instagram. They seem like the most incredible couple. And I just feel so heartbroken by the passing of Bob Saget.

[00:48:25] Chelsey Donn: Every time I think about him, I just smile. It's such a part of my youth. And I think it's incredible that we have these artists and entertainers. In our lives, that really feel like family. And for me, Bob Saget was one of those people and I hope wherever he is now, his spirit is that he is, I don't know, getting his angel wings or something.

[00:48:47] Chelsey Donn: Cause I think he really touched a lot of people. Everybody that's been speaking about Bob Saget over the past several weeks has talked about how much love. He exuded and how he never ended a conversation with anyone, whether it was via text, email, phone, without saying, I love you. And I think that's such a beautiful thing and something that I'm really going to take to heart and try to honor in my own life.

[00:49:12] Chelsey Donn: And so for that reason, I would love to induct Bob Saget as My Royal Highness.

[00:49:22] Trey Gerrald: Nicely said. Full house. I mean, that was my everything. Yes.

[00:49:27] Chelsey Donn: Mine too.

[00:49:28] Trey Gerrald: And find fact Bob Saget was hired after they shot the pilot and they had

[00:49:34] Chelsey Donn: I know.

[00:49:35] Trey Gerrald: go back and only shoot the Danny Tanner scenes, which is so

[00:49:40] Chelsey Donn: crazy. Yeah. All right. Trey. Who are you inducting this week for your Royal Highness?

[00:49:47] Trey Gerrald: again, opposite end of the spectrum. And if you were a member, I told everyone to bookmark Chelsey's complaint was about sinuses. And today I am going to induct Wellness Formula. Have you ever heard of wellness?

[00:50:00] Chelsey Donn: I've seen it. It is, uh, from like whole

[00:50:02] Chelsey Donn: foods.

[00:50:03] Trey Gerrald: So wellness formula is a product from the company source naturals, which like you can get at a whole foods. It is like a sort of holistic sort of.

[00:50:15] Chelsey Donn: Like all the vitamins.

[00:50:17] Trey Gerrald: So, okay. This was introduced to me by my friend, Emily Afton, who is back on Broadway and Hadestown, shout out to Emily Afton. And she introduced to me literally like 10 years ago.

[00:50:30] Trey Gerrald: It's basically, it contains 30 different ingredients from antioxidants, herbal extracts, vitamins and minerals. I think it's like, Eastern medicine. Ediology. But what it does is it attacks like the cellular level of your immune system. So, and it's crazy, like the pills are like kind of like horse pills and the taste is like horrifying and awful, you literally. Well, they have different sizes, so it sort of changes. So it's six capsules, this one, every three hours at like the on-site and Chelsey, I swear by this, it is like, it's crazy. It's like, it's what, like, I don't want to say the brand. It's what those little packets that you dump into water and swish around try to swallow.

[00:51:18] Trey Gerrald: It's trying to do this. Crap is so insane. And. And actually, I, the reason I'm circling to your thing is that on their website, it literally says wellness formula addresses the root causes of winter season challenges. That's their like mission statement. the instant you feel like, oh no, something's coming.

[00:51:41] Trey Gerrald: It just like boosts your immune system. it's also in dropper form. Like it's crazy. I swear by it. Go to your natural, you

[00:51:49] Chelsey Donn: Whole foods, whatever.

[00:51:50] Trey Gerrald: of those places, I swear by it.

[00:51:52] Trey Gerrald: So for that reason, I'm inducting wellness formula for My Royal Highness, because it has literally saved me truly so many times.

[00:52:01] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Thank you. On this formula. It's always good to have a pr