TRANSCRIPT of Episode 68: "College Dining Hall 1 vs. 5 Stars"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 68: "College Dining Hall 1 vs. 5 Stars"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: Hello.

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Hi, and hello listeners. Welcome once again, to Review That Review, the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:41] Chelsey Donn: reviews were just like Cisco and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:53] Trey Gerrald: mm-hmm that voice was Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:56] Chelsey Donn: that voice was Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:59] Trey Gerrald: Our voices together, create that little dust bunny that we like to call

[00:01:04] VOICEOVER: The review Queens.

[00:01:08] Chelsey Donn: That's

[00:01:09] Trey Gerrald: Cheerio, Queens and

[00:01:12] Chelsey Donn: Queens

[00:01:13] Trey Gerrald: Cheerio to all of our Patreon members who have exclusive access to our companion after show podcast, which features additional reviews, salacious, deep dives, full video recordings, merch discounts, and a whole heck of a lot Mo

[00:01:29] Chelsey Donn: so much Mo

[00:01:31] Trey Gerrald: so if you wanna join them, why Donn don't you go visit our Patreon page?

[00:01:34] Trey Gerrald: You can find that at Patreon dot com slash Review That Review, or just go to our website Chelsey, I just woke up from a nap. How are you?

[00:01:44] Chelsey Donn: I'm good. Everything's good. I'm hoping Goldie's gonna make it through this recording. She's a little feisty. She was doing a little ankle biting before we got started. So hoping for the best.

[00:01:55] Trey Gerrald: Well, as Mariah, once sang, you can make it through the rain.

[00:02:01] Chelsey Donn: Exactly. Exactly. How's

[00:02:04] Trey Gerrald: Donn know girl, I was asleep, passed out

[00:02:08] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Welcome.

[00:02:09] Trey Gerrald: I woke up about 10 minutes ago when I texted you and said, this time's still good. And you actually said, yeah. So I was like, okay, I have to get up. So here I am. That's why I had to restart the beginning.

[00:02:22] Trey Gerrald: That's why I said something about dust bunnies. It's gonna be a fun show.

[00:02:27] Chelsey Donn: at least you're rested, right?

[00:02:30] Trey Gerrald: I think, I don't know. I'm kind of, sort of like out of sorts. I'm like, am I still asleep?

[00:02:35] Chelsey Donn: you could still be asleep. This could all be a simulation who knows

[00:02:39] Trey Gerrald: This is a

[00:02:39] Chelsey Donn: this is a dream. This is a dream. Well, while you're dreaming, do you, were you thinking of like things that annoyed you or complaints that you had? No.

[00:02:48] Trey Gerrald: I don't know why I just put chocolate covered all in

[00:02:51] Chelsey Donn: Oh, I do. Cuz they're

[00:02:52] Trey Gerrald: Something's something's really off what's happening. No, I, it was really like a power nap, so I don't think I actually was sleeping or

[00:02:59] Chelsey Donn: you didn't dream.

[00:03:00] Trey Gerrald: I didn't dream, but I've recently discovered Ben and Jerry's ice cream. I know that like that has existed and like, I'm way behind.

[00:03:09] Trey Gerrald: I'm just not a sweets person. We've talked about a

[00:03:11] Chelsey Donn: well what flavor specifically?

[00:03:13] Trey Gerrald: Well, I realize that Ben and Jerry's will deliver to your house. Did you know

[00:03:18] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Well, I mean, not everywhere, but like, like, is it like a Ben and Jerry's

[00:03:23] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. It's like a, yes. I didn't know this existed. I thought it was just like packaged ice cream.

[00:03:28] Chelsey Donn: There is a storefront right next to like where I was living at NYU at the NYU dorms right down the street. And I think on your birthday, you got a free scoop.

[00:03:39] Trey Gerrald: that sounds. There was like a storefront on the upper west side when we lived there. And I ordered there a couple of times, but it's intimidating. It's hard to start Ben. And Jerry's because as you just asked, like, what's the flavors you're talking about because it's like the names, like don't have anything to do with what the actual contents are.

[00:03:56] Trey Gerrald: So then you have to like Google the contents. It's like, just give me vanilla. I'm not a very flavory person, but I'll tell you in the last week I, when you order from the store for delivery, they hand pack it. So it's like, I'm sure I don't think it's made in that store, but there's a little piece of like paper on top.

[00:04:15] Trey Gerrald: Like when you open the lid and it's like, not frozen crazy, like when you buy it at the store, like at a grocery store.

[00:04:21] Chelsey Donn: Is it in the Ben and Jerry's packaging or is it in like a cup?

[00:04:25] Trey Gerrald: no, it's in like their like packaging, but it doesn't have like, obviously any labels on it other than men and Jerry. So then there's a little white sticker and they like write it with a fun colored Sharpie.

[00:04:34] Trey Gerrald: My favorite flavor is coffee, coffee buzz, buzz.

[00:04:38] Chelsey Donn: that sounds right for you.

[00:04:39] Trey Gerrald: God. It's

[00:04:40] Chelsey Donn: I love America dream.

[00:04:43] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So, well, tell me,

[00:04:44] Chelsey Donn: It's vanilla base for sure. And then it has pieces of like chocolate covered waffle cone inside of it. Oh my God. It's so freaking good.

[00:04:58] Trey Gerrald: I can actually tell you where my discovery came because I was bored a couple of weeks ago and I was watching on YouTube, like how it's made and it was ice cream, but literally this episode was like from 2001 or

[00:05:11] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:05:12] Trey Gerrald: And they were like interviewing the taste tester for, at Ben.

[00:05:15] Trey Gerrald: And Jerry's, it was like this like 70 year old man. He has a gold plated spoon and they were like talking through how they like come up with flavors and they have to like figure, you know, like whatever. But, um, I think that's probably what put it in my head, which is why I ordered it a couple weeks ago. I just realized that anyway, we got into this tangent, but you were asking me about complaints and I think I am ready.

[00:05:37] VOICEOVER: Lodge Complaint.

[00:05:38] Chelsey Donn: okay.

[00:05:39] Trey Gerrald: It happened to you today. And I, as I was going through it, I was like, oh, this is absolutely my Complaint. For later, I have to Lodge a Complaint against speech to text translations. I was texting with Chelsey this afternoon while driving, but safely, I was communicating to Siri in my car, through my car play and it was typing to her.

[00:06:03] Trey Gerrald: And so, you know, it's like, you speak free will, and then like, it like is circling and then you finish and it's like, you are texting and it repeats it back to you. But it's like sometimes a couple of words are off or like, it doesn't understand when you paused for a millisecond, you wanted a period there.

[00:06:21] Trey Gerrald: So then it's just like all of a sudden you keep going. And then, and it's like, what? Or I was texting to David and I said, oh, I was like, there's debris everywhere. And. When it read back what it was sending him. It said strawberries like it, that, and then I had this like thing, like, okay, I'm gonna have to text him again really quick and say, that was like me texting in the car, but I can't just stop with that.

[00:06:48] Trey Gerrald: Cuz then he is gonna be like, don't text and drive. So then I would have to be like, that's me talking through the speech to text feature in the car and then I'm like freaking out because I don't wanna like, you know, it's, it's like, it's just this never ending problem. And I was texting with you. And then I was like, I sent like four texts in a row and I was like, I

[00:07:07] Chelsey Donn: you're like the reason I'm sending you these things in a row.

[00:07:10] Trey Gerrald: And then you're just like, Okay. Or what, like, that's not even what you said, but it's like, anyway, I'm just really frustrated because I, my, my gut here is that the more you use the feature, it learns your voice, I'm expecting, but in order to get through it, you have to keep doing it. And it's just so stressful and frustrating because it's annoying your I'm someone that doesn't like to have spelling errors.

[00:07:34] Trey Gerrald: And it seems like it's just inevitable. And I, I don't like that, cuz I can't, you can't rely on a robot to be a human. And I think that's a tricky, that's a tricky route.

[00:07:45] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:07:46] Trey Gerrald: Anyway. Do you have any experience here? It's really frustrating to me.

[00:07:49] Chelsey Donn: Well, I do. And like, so the thing is I, I find it very distracting to be driving and concerned that the robot isn't gonna get it right. Because of that, like, I am gonna have to check it. So I that's, I mean, you know, this, I am a caller for that reason, because if I'm driving, I will call and leave a voice message for what it is that I want to say and people, I mean, have I done this as a Complaint before I'm gonna Lodge right into my Complaint off of piggybacking off of yours, people have like, such a problem with the calling and the voicemail leaving.

[00:08:31] Chelsey Donn: Like, as if they're like accosted, like I'm attacking them because I'm calling them and leaving them a message. If I call you and you're busy, you are under zero obligation to reply. In fact, if I'm leaving you a voicemail, you're on zero obligation to acknowledge whatever is said in that voicemail, until you have a moment where you're able to listen to it and then reply, if it's an emergency and I call you, maybe you don't answer, then like I'll pull over and text message you.

[00:09:04] Chelsey Donn: Cause I understand that that's like easier just to read real quick, but why are we acting like you're accosted, I'm attacking you just by calling you. Like, I feel like this was really became a millennial thing. Like older generations don't have as much of a problem with this, but starting from our generation and certainly younger.

[00:09:24] Chelsey Donn: It's like, it's become very acceptable to hate on people who call and leave voicemails. Why.

[00:09:33] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I feel like there is that, um, cultural statement. It's like this could have been an email or whatever, but it is funny because I had the strict impulse at the very beginning before you even started lodging this, when you said. I'll just call you. I had the impulse to say, well, friendship over, but I don't know how, if I actually really feel that way, or if it's just part of our cultural thing, like just text texting is less intrusive for some reason, people assume, but I also

[00:10:03] Chelsey Donn: like,

[00:10:03] Trey Gerrald: like,

[00:10:03] Chelsey Donn: a, that's also like go to therapy and work that out with your therapist. If you really feel like a phone call is a costing, you that's like a bigger issue. I think people really do feel that way though.

[00:10:16] Trey Gerrald: Do you have people that just call you that you wish would not?

[00:10:20] Chelsey Donn: no, I don't. Cuz I am like fine with the phone. And I think that my fellow friends that are fine with the phone are gonna call me and they're gonna know, you know, if I can answer, I can answer if I can, I won't, I'll call you back when I can, like, I don't have a problem with it, but I will say that I have like a working relationship with someone and I'll leave it at that.

[00:10:40] Chelsey Donn: And this person does not like it. If I call them without giving them like huge, fair warning, like there's going to be a phone call because this is an anxiety inducting thing for them. And for me, that's anxiety inducting, because that means if I'm working with you, we've have a working relationship.

[00:10:59] Chelsey Donn: Things are going on. I have a thought about something while I'm driving or whatever it is. I need to pull over to text message you that thing, because if I just call you and like, leave it on your voicemail, or just like, whatever, like That's, I'm accosting you. Like, I need to reserve the time to call you.

[00:11:19] Chelsey Donn: And I just think it's crap. I mean, I think there are limits. I think we don't call anybody before 10:00 AM. We don't call anybody after 10:00 AM. 10:00 PM. Sorry. You know, if it's especially a business like or work related thing. Yeah. So I think that there's etiquette certainly, but I think to like blanket statement, be like, I don't do phone calls.

[00:11:40] Chelsey Donn: I Donn don't do whatever. And like you're in a working relationship with other people. How is that acceptable? I think it's crazy. Quite frankly.

[00:11:50] Trey Gerrald: Right. Chelsea's not talking about me just FYI.

[00:11:53] Chelsey Donn: I'm definitely not talking about Trey. I'm talking about someone else.

[00:11:56] Trey Gerrald: Every time you kept saying that, I was like, I wonder if people are like, oh no, are they in a fight? I wonder if it's all around some sort of interest and boundaries. Because when I think back to when we only had rotary phones, you had to answer because you didn't know who was on the other line and we didn't have caller ID.

[00:12:15] Trey Gerrald: We didn't even have voicemails at a certain time in history. And now it's like you have 24 hour access to any human being with texting or emailing or calling. So even voice memos, we are, oh, Natalie who sings a theme song. She loves to leave a voice memo, which is also like, that's actually interesting, cuz it's not a lot of

[00:12:37] Chelsey Donn: interesting. Cause I thought maybe I could do the voice memo while driving, but actually that's like very difficult to do. You can do that.

[00:12:44] Trey Gerrald: hard, right?

[00:12:45] Chelsey Donn: So, like, I don't know why the voice memos were okay. But the voicemails weren't, that's a whole nother thing. But the thing about the voice memo is that like it is for me, it's like you can't unread a text message, but I can't always listen to your voice memo if I'm in like a public place.

[00:13:05] Chelsey Donn: So that's kind of its own annoyance.

[00:13:08] Trey Gerrald: I hear that.

[00:13:08] Chelsey Donn: the point is I don't like write any of the forms off, I think use your form. It's up to me in terms of the boundaries thing. And this is the last thing I'll say about it. Cause obviously I'm getting heated, but in terms of the boundary thing, I'm all about people having their own boundaries.

[00:13:25] Chelsey Donn: I just don't understand why we think it's a boundary crosser. For me to call you or leave a voicemail. It is within your right as a boundary holder to not listen to that voicemail right away or not respond to that call right away or respond to that call with a text if that's what you'd like to do. But there's nothing to do with me breaking your boundary by making a phone call, especially when I'm driving, because I wanna be a safe driver cuz I'm distracted by the voice to text.

[00:13:54] Trey Gerrald: It is interesting, cuz in my relationship with David, he feels the same way you do about like, if I call you and you can't speak, like you don't have to answer, which was completely new information to me, I always felt like I had to answer the phone, which is probably something in the difference between our upbringings.

[00:14:12] Trey Gerrald: But like even today he called me and I didn't answer it because I was trying to take an app and then I was like, oh God, what if he's in a, can a Hora something bad? I was like, well, he'll call a second time. But, and that you really got heated and that wasn't even your written down Complaint for

[00:14:27] Chelsey Donn: It's on the list. Certainly it's on the list. It wasn't the one I was gonna do today, but then when you got started, I was just like, I'm already hated mind as well.

[00:14:38] Trey Gerrald: Oh, well,

[00:14:38] Chelsey Donn: Well, now that we're so hot and bothered

[00:14:41] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. Let's talk about hot things or things that are, should be hot, but aren't, that sounds like, well, I don't wanna lead the audience down a

[00:14:50] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:14:51] Trey Gerrald: but let's do it. Let's jump in. Should we let's go

[00:14:55] Chelsey Donn: we should, uh, oh, it's a versus episode. Let's do it.

[00:15:01] VOICEOVER: Assess that Kvetch.

[00:15:03] Trey Gerrald: today? Chelsey and I are going to cover a One-Star-Zinger and a five star on the same topic. Today's topic is the USC dining hall.

[00:15:16] Chelsey Donn: That's right. All you college kids who are now back in school right now for this versus episode, Trey selected the One-Star-Zinger and I selected the five star. So to determine who rates first, we gotta flip that quota. I think it's my turn to guess.

[00:15:31] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. So you ready?

[00:15:32] Chelsey Donn: All right, I'm gonna go with heads.

[00:15:36] Trey Gerrald: It's tales. I feel like I've gone first, the last 19 episodes.

[00:15:39] Chelsey Donn: fine. That's what the universe wanted. So Trey is gonna go first. So today we're covering, as Trey mentioned. A USC dining hall. This particular dining hall is called EVK, which stands for everybody's kitchen dining hall at the university of Southern California. According to the USC website, everybody's kitchen offers home style favorites made to order action station pizza, daily grill specials, salad bar, and dessert station.

[00:16:12] Chelsey Donn: They offer monthly theme nights where they transform the dining room, bring in entertainment and let the chefs go all out with the menu each. What are you just, mm.

[00:16:25] Trey Gerrald: I just said mm-hmm but okay.

[00:16:26] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Each residential community is anchored by an all you care to eat D venue, offering a different culinary experience, appealing to a variety of dining preferences and nutritional lifestyles styles.

[00:16:45] Chelsey Donn: At the time of this recording, the EVK dining hall has 34 Yelp reviews with an average rating of two and a half out of five. So right down the middle, it has not been claimed on Yelp by USC. Okay. So with all this background info in mind, well, before we jump in, I just wanna say, did you have a meal plan at school?

[00:17:08] Chelsey Donn: Trey?

[00:17:08] Trey Gerrald: I did my freshman year of college, but never after that. What about you?

[00:17:14] Chelsey Donn: same. And I think that like that all you can you care to dying thing again? Not that I'm like, like pointing any fingers, but the whole freshman 15 thing is definitely the dining hall.

[00:17:25] Trey Gerrald: Mmm.

[00:17:25] Chelsey Donn: Cuz I Donn, Donn don't think that like we're supposed to just be let, to eat lots of fried food like that. I don't know it was, it was dangerous for me cuz there was a dining hall in my freshman.

[00:17:37] Trey Gerrald: Well, it's interesting to me, cuz my memory is that it's all you can eat and it's funny to me, they've changed it to all you care to

[00:17:44] Chelsey Donn: Care to eat. Right. Well, I think they're trying to say like, you don't have to eat at all, but if you want to, you can

[00:17:53] Trey Gerrald: In these certain hours.

[00:17:54] Chelsey Donn: exactly. Ugh. It was dangerous, but it was, it was clutch anyway with all that background in front of mine. I'm so curious to hear what this One-Star-Zinger has to say, Trey. So let's, let's jump right in.

[00:18:06] Trey Gerrald: Let's do it.

[00:18:10] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:18:14] Trey Gerrald: Alrighty. So yes, I today have the One-Star-Zinger Yelp review for the EVK, which to me does not abbreviate as

[00:18:22] Chelsey Donn: I know Everybody's it's funny, but yeah,

[00:18:26] Trey Gerrald: I think it would be BK. Well, whatever who cares. Um, so today is One-Star-Zinger is written by J dot CT. So I guess it's Jesus Christ, everyone

[00:18:39] Chelsey Donn: Oh, yes. So did he go to USC?

[00:18:42] Trey Gerrald: guess so.

[00:18:43] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:18:44] Trey Gerrald: So this is JCS One-Star-Zinger Yelp review for the EVK dining hall at USC.

[00:18:51] Chelsey Donn: Let's hear it.

[00:18:53] Trey Gerrald: Keep it simple. Is the motto placed prominently on the wall of everybody's kitchen, a less than premier dining hall at a premier university. At first, I thought, keep it simple meant this was the place to go for the basics while the village and Parkside offer an array of complex options, EVK seemed to stick with American classics, burgers, cheese steaks.

[00:19:22] Trey Gerrald: Et cetera, simple cooked vegetables, several types of meat, a concept I happen to like as time went on, however, I began to suspect, keep it simple, actually stands for several other things. Chiefly minimum effort, meaning only cooking, good, fresh food. When a lot of visiting students or parents are on campus or keeping it to simple, to check for caterpillars and their food before serving it to the bright young minds of our generation or keeping the broccoli nice and yellow and the burgers.

[00:20:09] Trey Gerrald: Nice and cold. My confusion is furthered by the seeming lack of ability to fund better quality food in this establishment, coupled with the spontaneous hiring of a DJ to blast our eardrums out while we parentheses try to enjoy our mediocre food, my efforts to expose EVK are probably futile. It well represents the USC practice of spending on any and all things that make it look good, but skimping out when it comes to the nitty gritty and the lives of students actually paying to be there, things like properly colored water and the faucets or showers that produce more than a SU drizzle, things like caterpillar, free food and nice green broccoli. Fight on.

[00:21:17] Chelsey Donn: okay. Alright. Jesus Christ JC. Um, I wish they had given us more information about the caterpillar incident, cuz it's like quite a detail to just like pop in there. I sort of wanted to know like, is this a regular thing there's like constantly caterpillars in the food or was it more of a like yeah.

[00:21:38] Trey Gerrald: time

[00:21:39] Chelsey Donn: This is like not the best food.

[00:21:40] Chelsey Donn: And one time I have this situation, I, I know that this isn't really a part of the assessment, but I just remembered this thing. Did you know that dining halls across America certainly put laxatives in the food

[00:21:54] Trey Gerrald: What now?

[00:21:56] Chelsey Donn: as a safety precaution? Because so many people, like let's say there was a, some sort of like out bacteria outbreak at a dining hall.

[00:22:07] Chelsey Donn: They can't afford for like that many people to get sick. So they put laxatives in the food so that it works through the system faster. And you have less of a chance of getting sick.

[00:22:17] Trey Gerrald: Oh, my word. That's such an American concept.

[00:22:20] Chelsey Donn: Isn't it such a American problem solving.

[00:22:23] Trey Gerrald: Well, I agree. I agree with the thoughts here about needing a little more detail in the story about the caterpillar. This is sort of not helpful for us to write this review, but I will tell you in reading several one stars, I did see multiple mentions of late ladybugs bugs and caterpillars

[00:22:45] Chelsey Donn: that's crazy.

[00:22:46] Trey Gerrald: bar.

[00:22:47] Chelsey Donn: Wow.

[00:22:48] Trey Gerrald: weird. Right.

[00:22:49] Chelsey Donn: That is weird. I do know that like, when I go to the farmer's market and stuff, sometimes there are like little bugs in the lettuce

[00:22:57] Trey Gerrald: But that's outside.

[00:22:58] Chelsey Donn: yeah.

[00:23:00] Trey Gerrald: And that's very fresh. It's a

[00:23:01] Chelsey Donn: cuz it's fresh and it's like on, off the farm and they don't have pesticides and stuff like that. So I don't know.

[00:23:07] Chelsey Donn: That's

[00:23:07] Trey Gerrald: But that's different though, Chelsey, because you're gonna buy that lettuce and then you're gonna

[00:23:12] Chelsey Donn: wash it

[00:23:13] Trey Gerrald: It's not like putting it on a plate to fork,

[00:23:16] Chelsey Donn: You're right. That's this is like we should be serving. I thought it was an interesting. Note that they like really spruce up the dining hall for the parents and prospective students.

[00:23:30] Trey Gerrald: Mm-hmm

[00:23:30] Chelsey Donn: something I wouldn't have really thought of, but I do think that that's super interesting as a student at a university that's so popular that probably has tons of people visiting it all the time.

[00:23:42] Chelsey Donn: Like, I just think that's such a weird thing to be in the dining hall and be like, oh, we have fresh baked cookies today. Must be, uh, prospective students, you know, touring the school or something like that. Like I just think it's interesting to change the menu for that, but it makes sense, I guess.

[00:23:58] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, it's, it's also, I wanna point out here, like this is sort of spelling and grammar ish, but it's interesting cuz you know, we have read many, many reviews and this review really feels like a college student. To me, it feels like they got a thesis statement by like looking around and they're like, Hmm, it's so interesting that keep it simple is on the wall.

[00:24:21] Trey Gerrald: I'm gonna structure this five paragraph essay around,

[00:24:25] Chelsey Donn: the concept of keep it simple.

[00:24:27] Trey Gerrald: and I'm gonna keep bringing it back up. And the vocabulary words are very rich in this and they use a lot of dashes, a lot of commas. They really are adding, supporting evidence minus more details about the caterpillar. But I like that they circle back and bring up the caterpillar one last time.

[00:24:46] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:24:47] Trey Gerrald: It really does read pretty and it feels like I felt nice reading it. Like I felt like it made me feel smart.

[00:24:56] Chelsey Donn: What, what do we think about like the, the tackling onto this review of like the weird colored water and like, was it the shower pressure or like something else?

[00:25:08] Trey Gerrald: I'm glad you said that. Cuz it does feel like UN it doesn't feel part of the

[00:25:14] Chelsey Donn: It's not really like on point with the

[00:25:17] Trey Gerrald: No, I don't think anyone. No. I don't think anyone in the kitchen has anything to do with the water pressure and the dorms,

[00:25:23] Chelsey Donn: Exactly. So I do think that's a little odd,

[00:25:26] Trey Gerrald: they're sort of adding that as like an overarching theme of being a student at this school, which I think is sort of irrelevant cuz they're different departments,

[00:25:35] Chelsey Donn: right? I like that they had the pretension to refer to them and their classmates as bright, young minds

[00:25:43] Trey Gerrald: of our generation.

[00:25:44] Chelsey Donn: of our generation,

[00:25:45] Trey Gerrald: Mm-hmm I also like the phrase skimping.

[00:25:48] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I do feel like that's a common thing in college is like trying to meet the bottom line or whatever that is, but it's hard cuz I feel. USC is similar to NYU. It's like, you know, a lot of spoiled kids with a lot of very high expectations.

[00:26:04] Chelsey Donn: It does. I'm not leading the witness, but it does make me wonder if like, is JC a little bit more picky? Like, do we think that they're just like an average person? Or I know that like a lot of the people that I went to school with, especially the guys were just like thrilled to have access to this gross junk food where I didn't really, I Donn don't even know if I kept my meal plan for second semester.

[00:26:30] Chelsey Donn: I maybe did. I know I definitely didn't pass freshman year, cuz like I wanted higher quality food. I didn't want dining hall food, but I also like don't necessarily hold that against the dining hall. Like knock on all the wood. I don't think I ever got like food poisoning or anything like that. And that I feel like is like a real measure of a nightmare.

[00:26:49] Chelsey Donn: So I do wonder if JCS opinion applies to everybody.

[00:26:53] Trey Gerrald: Well, it is interesting cuz there, cuz I get the opinion that JC is just saying like we want green broccoli and like hot burgers.

[00:27:03] Chelsey Donn: right. True. True, true, true.

[00:27:06] Trey Gerrald: So that doesn't feel as bratty to me, but it does. I do have it a, I do have an overall feeling that JC feels, uh, what's the word. They, they, they sort of have a chip on their shoulder that everyone is out to get them that comes across in this cuz they're

[00:27:21] Chelsey Donn: do feel that a little bit.

[00:27:23] Trey Gerrald: a premier university, but maybe that's just more supporting evidence.

[00:27:27] Trey Gerrald: I Donn don't

[00:27:28] Chelsey Donn: And maybe that is more of like a college thing. Like having been really knocked off your, like when you go to a college, especially a college like USC, which is a great school. Like everything, the end all be all is getting to a great school. And then afterwards, like life really hasn't kicked JC and the nuts yet, you know,

[00:27:45] Trey Gerrald: I mean, to me, I it's funny, like, I don't think that dining halls are gonna be nice. Like, I don't think that they're gonna be good. So I, I don't know,

[00:27:55] Chelsey Donn: I think there's like varying degrees, you know,

[00:27:59] Trey Gerrald: I suppose, but I they're obviously not fine dining.

[00:28:03] Chelsey Donn: They're not fine dining. And they're not claiming to be, especially like, no matter what way you wanna interpret the, keep it simple, catch, raise, motto, whatever you wanna call it. You know, clearly it is indicating like, yeah, we're keeping it simple.

[00:28:15] Chelsey Donn: We're keeping it basic. So it's not gonna be.

[00:28:18] Trey Gerrald: Do you think there's value in this.

[00:28:20] Chelsey Donn: I think there is, I guess, like other than the cold burgers and the yellow broccoli. I don't know if this feels very One-Star-Zinger to me. I think, I think of One-Star-Zinger reviews as being like more nightmarish, like this terrible thing happened to me.

[00:28:38] Chelsey Donn: Whereas this feels a little bit more like two star, three star where it's like, it's fine. I ate there, like on the days when perspective students were there, it was good on days when they weren't, it wasn't that great. But like, what is so catastrophic in this review? That merits a One-Star-Zinger cause One-Star-Zinger, that's a statement.

[00:28:57] Trey Gerrald: That's a good point. Like I wonder maybe JC did not personally have the caterpillar in their food cuz I'm imagining whoever did have the caterpillar. That's really One-Star-Zinger. I agree with you. I do feel like they're just saying like, this is not good and it doesn't meet the standards of what you would expect for this very prestigious university.

[00:29:17] Chelsey Donn: I think that's yeah. See, I forgot about the caterpillar because it just wasn't attached to any emotion, which I wonder if it was done in just in humor, like making it so sort of lax like that, like, and then caterpillars in the food and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, instead of being like, I was on board until caterpillar, you know,

[00:29:39] Trey Gerrald: also thinking like, maybe that's like an ongoing, urban myth, like, oh, there's caterpillars in the salads at EVK or maybe it's a prank. Like I could see it's a college, like some stupid science major was like, ha ha. Watch what I'm doing. Ethel. know why I said it. Okay. I think that this, like, I am getting, this is not lair and that it's not that great.

[00:30:05] Chelsey Donn: Right. I agree. I think what, where JC is succeeding is they're really setting up my expectations.

[00:30:13] Trey Gerrald: That's the word I was gonna say. They're telling me to not expect anything. Good.

[00:30:18] Chelsey Donn: Right. Which I appreciate. Yeah.

[00:30:22] Trey Gerrald: I do. I, I, I believe them, but I also sort of feel like for some reason, I'm having a hard time telling, like, is it a little shady, cuz they're ending with the phrase fight on and they're talking about other instances where they feel cheated by this university that

[00:30:38] Chelsey Donn: on is like a USC thing. I wanna say that's like a Trojans fight

[00:30:42] Trey Gerrald: oh, oh, oh thank you.

[00:30:46] Chelsey Donn: You're welcome.

[00:30:46] Trey Gerrald: Is USC like the little mascot guy? That's like the Trojan

[00:30:50] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:30:51] Trey Gerrald: yeah, yeah, yeah. I can see his little head. Um, alright. Do you think that this will be a common experience for people?

[00:30:58] Chelsey Donn: I do. I

[00:30:59] Trey Gerrald: I kind of do too. If the broccoli is yellow more than one time, that's a problem. Like it's broccoli.

[00:31:05] Trey Gerrald: It's broccoli's everywhere. It's not like, it's not like we're talking about Flamen it's like.

[00:31:10] Chelsey Donn: that, yeah. That's definitely not great,

[00:31:14] Trey Gerrald: I would be upset though, if I was a student and I had this meal plan, cuz I remember when I was in school, you know, my dad was like, you really need to eat there cuz we're paying for

[00:31:24] Chelsey Donn: right? Exactly.

[00:31:25] Trey Gerrald: to restaurants every so often, but like you, you can't

[00:31:29] Chelsey Donn: paying for this unlimited plan and that's the whole idea. Yeah. Now we

[00:31:34] Trey Gerrald: The couple of chuckles,

[00:31:36] Chelsey Donn: I think they were trying for humor. I don't know how successful JC was, but I do think that they were making an effort.

[00:31:44] Trey Gerrald: this might be a show first for me, but I was entertained reading it. Like it does feel like an essay to me. I, I felt like this is a scholarly piece of writing, which is like, seems like an unusual territory for that. Like I, I enjoyed J's literary voice while reading it.

[00:32:02] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I think that JC made a real Valiant effort, especially with the spelling and grammar being on point. I think we can tell that they're a college student, like you said, they're not just sloping something together. They're they're really, uh, putting together a narrative. All right. I feel like I've, I've gathered all the Intel I need,

[00:32:22] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, let's crown let's crown Jesus. All right. So ChelseyBD and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards in an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another's opinions. We will simultaneously reveal our ratings.

[00:32:38] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating

[00:32:44] VOICEOVER: to.

[00:32:46] Chelsey Donn: All right. I'm holding up three and a half crowns. Trey is holding up four crowns. I went with three and a half for JC, you know, a little bit above middle of the road. I wanted more info in the caterpillar. I love a personal story. As you know, if we're gonna drop some shade, I wanna know really the personal event that happened, because if you're gonna go ahead and call it One-Star-Zinger then give me that show stopping moment that makes this a non-negotiable.

[00:33:16] Chelsey Donn: I don't really feel like JC succeeded on that for me. I think they succeeded in a lot of other places and that's why I went with three and a half, but I couldn't give them more than that because I wanted more, I wanted more from JC in terms of the personal experience and why this was really a, One-Star-Zinger why, uh, four stars from me, Trey.

[00:33:36] Trey Gerrald: Well, I said four because interesting. I, I actually appreciate the cool collectedness throughout this review, which I think we got into a conversation about, like, it doesn't feel like a One-Star-Zinger because it doesn't feel like this. Raging horrifying experience. And then I also found myself wanting more details.

[00:33:56] Trey Gerrald: So I said four, because I think it's beautifully written. I'm, it's hard for me to tell the truthful shady scale here, because I can't tell if JC is on a campaign to pull the wool back from people's eyes that like USC is duping people, because as they say, my efforts to expose are probably futile, which makes me think, oh, okay.

[00:34:19] Trey Gerrald: Like, it seems like the world is showing up in a certain way to JC that life's hard and no one's caring, which is very college student. But, um, I, but I actually enjoy the review. I think the lasting impact here is like, I'm gonna turn all of my romaine leaves upside down. I'm gonna like dig around and like, you know, I don't know if I would, I would probably try to knock at the meal plan, honestly.

[00:34:43] Chelsey Donn: Or maybe seek out other dining calls,

[00:34:47] Trey Gerrald: I would also know that when I tour the school, it's probably not gonna be a good rec. Uh, it's not gonna be

[00:34:53] Chelsey Donn: representation.

[00:34:54] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. That's all smoke and mirrors and acting. I'm acting.

[00:34:58] Chelsey Donn: Right. I agree.

[00:35:00] Trey Gerrald: All right,

[00:35:02] Chelsey Donn: Well that was fun. Should we, should we take a quick break?

[00:35:06] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, let's do a quick game break. And then when we come back, we will hear Chelsea's five star review, and then we can determine is the EVK good or bad? God, I can't wait to decide BRB

[00:35:21] Chelsey Donn: Love it. B B

[00:35:23] Trey Gerrald: B B bye.

[00:35:24] Chelsey Donn: B, B B. Bye. Now.

[00:35:28] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown. We'll be right back.

[00:35:39] Chelsey Donn: Wow.

[00:35:40] Trey Gerrald: Not yet.

[00:35:41] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:36:03] Trey Gerrald: Did you wanna do

[00:36:04] Chelsey Donn: wow. I mean, you're usually the one that does

[00:36:07] Trey Gerrald: could do it

[00:36:09] Chelsey Donn: You do it.

[00:36:11] Trey Gerrald: fight on it's game time.

[00:36:14] Chelsey Donn: That's right. It is game time. We have a brand new game. Trey has no idea. I've created this game specifically for our back to college episode. Trey, are you ready to play a brand new game?

[00:36:29] Trey Gerrald: I'm ready.

[00:36:31] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Should we do that weird Hawaiian music. All right. Trey. This game is called professor or Kvetch.

[00:36:41] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Is it a class that is taught by a real professor or is it the title of a review written by a Kvetch.

[00:36:53] Chelsey Donn: All right. So you're gonna tell me professor or Fetcher.

[00:36:55] Trey Gerrald: so it's like, is this a class or is this a subject

[00:36:59] Chelsey Donn: Do you think it's a real class or did I pull this from the title of a Kvetch

[00:37:04] Trey Gerrald: review? Got it. Okay.

[00:37:07] Chelsey Donn: Are you ready?

[00:37:09] Trey Gerrald: Um,

[00:37:10] Chelsey Donn: or Kvetch

[00:37:13] Trey Gerrald: okay. Yeah, I'm ready. Here we go.

[00:37:14] Chelsey Donn: for the love of Snoop.

[00:37:21] Trey Gerrald: is a Fetcher.

[00:37:23] Chelsey Donn: right. It's Kvetch.

[00:37:25] Trey Gerrald: Yay.

[00:37:27] Chelsey Donn: What if Harry Potter is real?

[00:37:33] Trey Gerrald: Well, I'm thrown off by the tents there. What if Harry Potter is real? I think if it was a class, it would be what if Harry Potter was real? So I'm gonna say this is a feer.

[00:37:48] Chelsey Donn: it is a professor. It is a class taught at Appalachian state university in Boone, North Carolina.

[00:37:58] Trey Gerrald: Whoa,

[00:37:59] Chelsey Donn: Right. Okay. Here we go. Death to fast fashion.

[00:38:08] Trey Gerrald: this is a Kvetch.

[00:38:10] Chelsey Donn: Yes, that is right. Trey. That is AFE.

[00:38:14] Trey Gerrald: Wait, was that about H and M

[00:38:16] Chelsey Donn: Oh. Death to fashion was an Amazon review written by HR for a book called how to get dressed a costume designer's secrets for making your clothes look fit and feel amazing. Okay.

[00:38:30] Trey Gerrald: Hillary RA?

[00:38:31] Chelsey Donn: Exactly. All right. The sociology of Miley Cyrus

[00:38:36] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I think you might be trying to trick me with the word sociology. So I must say this is a Kvetch.

[00:38:46] Chelsey Donn: professor, this is a class taught at Skidmore college.

[00:38:51] Trey Gerrald: What?

[00:38:52] Chelsey Donn: Here we go. Okay. Macon whoopy, Goldbergs cannon.

[00:39:02] Trey Gerrald: This is a course professor.

[00:39:04] Chelsey Donn: course. It's a course. It's a based college by professor Charles. I Nero he's self-identified I think created this class. All right. Street fighting mathematics. right. This is a, this is a course taught at MIT of all places. I know. Isn't it funny? Okay.

[00:39:33] Trey Gerrald: I'm tired right now.

[00:39:35] Chelsey Donn: Tight watery, the good life on a dollar a day.