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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 12: "Clowns: 1 & 5 Star Reviews"

Updated: Sep 17, 2021

Transcript of Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald

Episode 12"Clowns: 1 & 5 Star Reviews"

for the differently abled and those who prefer to read.

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn and Trey Gerrald

Episode 12

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:00] TREY: Hi.

[00:00:31] CHELSEY: Hello. I love pretending like I'm Natalie at the end of the riff and I can do that. So fun.

[00:00:36] TREY: With your little wagging finger.

[00:00:38] CHELSEY: Yes. So good.

[00:00:41] TREY: Hi everyone. Welcome to Review That Review the podcast dedicated to reviewing...

[00:00:46] CHELSEY: reviews! We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:58] TREY: That's Chelsey Donn,

[00:00:59] CHELSEY: and that's Trey Gerrald,

[00:01:01] TREY: and together we're...

[00:01:03] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens.

[00:01:08] TREY: We are so excited that you were all joining us today for yet another episode.

[00:01:12] CHELSEY: That's right. Thank you guys so much. We can't do what we do. We can't have a podcast without listeners like you, so thank you.

[00:01:19] TREY: That's true. It'd be really sad otherwise. Very beautifully said, my Queen.

[00:01:24] CHELSEY: Oh, thank you!

[00:01:26] TREY: Oh!

[00:01:26] CHELSEY: Oh my goodness. The time has finally come!

[00:01:31] TREY: Is today the day Chelsey?

[00:01:33] CHELSEY: It tis! Trey and I are so thrilled to announce two very special winners today.

[00:01:40] TREY: That is right. So today we get to announce who the winner is of our rate and review raffle.

[00:01:50] CHELSEY: Oh my God. But guess what? We entered all the names for our listeners who left us reviews. And instead of selecting just one,

[00:01:59] TREY: Yall, we selected two because you got two review queen hosts. So you gotta get two review queen winners.

[00:02:06] CHELSEY: That's right. We both got our golden tickets and we both assign those. Let's get that drum roll, please. The first winner is... J D Fit! Woo! So excited for you.

[00:02:22] TREY: And the second winner is... terigamble.

[00:02:31] CHELSEY: Woo! Oh my God. Congratulations Queens. You are our winners!

[00:02:37] TREY: You will both be receiving a gorgeous enamel pin.

[00:02:40] CHELSEY: Stunning.

[00:02:41] TREY: Pen, P I N.

[00:02:43] CHELSEY: Yes, Chanel would be proud.

[00:02:45] TREY: Chanel! And then they'll also be receiving this ballpoint pen.

[00:02:49] CHELSEY: Lovely.

[00:02:49] TREY: And it also is coated in some like antibacterial thing!

[00:02:53] CHELSEY: UGH! Bonus!!

[00:02:55] TREY: Bonus! And then we're also going to throw in a coffee mug. As a surprise.

[00:02:59] CHELSEY: Oh My God! Look at that we are full of surprises. Maybe even like a little personal note from the Queens. Possible.

[00:03:07] TREY: Yeah. Some, um, nudies, some Nudie Judy's

[00:03:10] CHELSEY: I'm... Trey. We'll be sending you nudes. I will send you some chicken noodle soup.

[00:03:15] TREY: I didn't say it would be our nudes.

[00:03:18] CHELSEY: Oh, good point. Good point. Okay.

[00:03:20] TREY: Wow. Okay. But in all seriousness, thank you, everyone who participated, We really do appreciate everyone jumping in, helping us launch. We appreciate you.

[00:03:28] CHELSEY: Yes. Thank you guys so much for those amazing five-star reviews. Keep them coming. We have something else in the wings. Don't you worry!

[00:03:36] TREY: Don't cha worry. So Chels-Chels.

[00:03:38] CHELSEY: Yes.

[00:03:39] TREY: How's your week been my queen?

[00:03:42] CHELSEY: It's been good. I'm still in, you know, full puppy mode over here. So that keeps me busy most of the time, but I just wanted to let our listeners know in case they were worried about my hydration.

[00:03:54] TREY: Yes, I was! I've been worried.

[00:03:55] CHELSEY: I know. I know we were all kind of worried about that. So I have a new plan, it's just the first step. It's not like gonna take me to the finish line, but if anyone ever like offers me water, I have to say yes.

[00:04:10] TREY: Oh, I love that.

[00:04:11] CHELSEY: Right. Isn't that a good plan? So it's like, would you like some water? Yes. The answer has to be yes.

[00:04:18] TREY: I really love that. How did you find, like, come up with that idea?

[00:04:21] CHELSEY: Somebody asked me for a water and I was like, this might be the universe disguised as this individual. And for that request, I shall say, "Thank you. Yes. I would love a glass of water."

[00:04:34] TREY: Wait, I literally thought you were going to be like, well, I read this book about powerful manipulation, but you literally like, well, I came up with that cause someone did it.

[00:04:42] CHELSEY: Somebody asked me. And in that very moment, I was just like here and now for as long as I can remember to do so I'm going to say yes. cause they're just trying to help me out. Or maybe they're like secretly like, oh, she looks really dehydrated and I should take the hint.

[00:04:59] TREY: I love that.

[00:05:00] CHELSEY: So that was the lesson of the week for me. What did you learn any lessons this week, Trey?

[00:05:04] TREY: That's a really great phrasing. I learned a lot of lessons this week. My sister gave birth to her second child.

[00:05:14] CHELSEY: So cute. I saw a picture.

[00:05:15] TREY: Miles was born. And so I flew down to Charlotte, North Carolina, so I could be with my family and help with... actually the day that we are recording this as the day before her other child's second birthday.

[00:05:30] CHELSEY: Oh!

[00:05:31] TREY: Yeah. So

[00:05:32] CHELSEY: I'm so glad that that worked out.

[00:05:34] TREY: Me too.

[00:05:35] CHELSEY: They have their own birthdays.

[00:05:36] TREY: I know!

[00:05:37] CHELSEY: The last thing your sis... and your sister's birthday is also around this time.

[00:05:41] TREY: My Mom's. Yes. Good job.