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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 46: "Balloon & Wine Festival / Nasty Gal"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 46: "Balloon & Wine Festival / Nasty Gal"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:30] Chelsey: Hello.

[00:00:31] Trey: Hey, everyone. Welcome to Review That. Review the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:36] Chelsey: Reviews. We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:49] Trey: that's Chelsey Donn,

[00:00:50] Chelsey: And that's Trey Gerrald

[00:00:52] Trey: and together we are

[00:00:53] VOICEOVER: The Review

[00:00:54] VOICEOVER: Queens!

[00:00:57] Chelsey: your trusty review! Queens.

[00:00:59] Trey: And if you want to support the show while getting bonus and exclusive content, including our special members only after show podcast, visit our patreon Page at

[00:01:12] Trey: Chelsey happy 420. Uh,

[00:01:20] Chelsey: Happy 420 Queens. I do think that there's something with Jesus and 420,

[00:01:26] Trey: What do you mean?

[00:01:27] Chelsey: his birthday or something, I got to look this up.

[00:01:30] Trey: Wait, what? Like Jesus Christ.

[00:01:33] Chelsey: Yeah. I mean says the Jew, but yes, there's like something. Oh God. Don't come at me. Jesus lovers. I, I respect everybody. I don't know. Happy 420.

[00:01:45] Trey: I'm not really a marijuana partake person. I have just for the novelty of it. When I was in last time when I was in Los Angeles, I did go to a dispensary just because it's legal. And so I was like, well, it's not going to be legal when I get back. It is today, this was years ago, but I went and it was really funny because I felt like I was in a haze because every employee at the med men was so high that I felt high because they all were so weird.

[00:02:14] Trey: was like, Hey man. And I was like, hi, um, I don't smoke, but like, I want to try this. So like, what should I do? And they're like, yeah, man, like calm down, you know? And I'm like, I'm nervous.

[00:02:28] Chelsey: oh my God. That's so funny. Well, somebody said 420, happy birthday. Jesus. I don't know where that came from, but I'm going to go.

[00:02:36] Trey: No. Well, Jesus, his birthday is

[00:02:37] Chelsey: Yeah. I don't know if that's true. The lunar calendar, you know what I mean? There's so many calendars happening anyway. Yeah. 420 is fun. Maybe I'll tell some stories on Patreon.

[00:02:49] Chelsey: Yeah. Why not? My week's going well, my day is going well. I like had a little bit of a kerfuffle in a parking lot that is going to like lodge right into my complaint.

[00:02:59] Trey: Go for a what happened?

[00:03:01] Lodge A Complaint!

[00:03:01] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint.

[00:03:02] Chelsey: Actually, I shouldn't call it a kerfuffle cause that makes it seem like I damaged something, which I didn't. So, you know, when you're in a parking lot, especially for a shopping center, you know, there's lots of people coming and going and Los Angeles has lots of one way parking situations, but not only are they one way and like, not very clear that they're one way, but the parking spaces are.

[00:03:26] Chelsey: Aligned in such a way that if you do enter in the wrong direction, it is nearly impossible to get into the parking space. So it's like I was running late to an appointment, admittedly. And I was pulling into the slot. I did not think that I was doing anything wrong. And then I realized I'm not going to be able to get into this spot because I'm going from the wrong direction. But like there were people surrounding me on all sides. And so I just had to, I felt like Austin Powers, you know, in that scene where he's like making that turn, like I had to just like, keep doing that.

[00:04:00] Chelsey: I kept turning to everyone around me. And I was like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. But like, is it necessary to do that with these slanted parking spaces? I don't know.

[00:04:11] Trey: Yeah. I don't understand the, unless it's like a very small lot. And like they're doing that for flow of traffic. I don't know what

[00:04:18] Chelsey: I guess, but like, it kind of makes it worse. Cause it was sort of small ish lot, but like there was a car that was pulling out that was driving towards me, so I couldn't turn towards them. So I naturally of course, got out of their way and was like, oh, that's fine. I'll just take a left up here. But then when I went to take my turn, I was going the wrong way.

[00:04:40] Chelsey: So maybe that car really started the whole kerfuffle, but the point is, if we can't rely on one another and we're not going to mark it in such a way, that is very obvious. Why are we even doing this?

[00:04:53] Trey: I have been in that situation before. I do know what you mean. It's like you can't get your car into it. Cause it's the wrong way. You just made me think of a really good complaint that I, I'm not going to.

[00:05:03] Trey: Yeah, I'm going to write it down. I hear you. That is a great complaint. I'm sorry that that happened to you. And I'm in agreement that we should just blame that person that was in front of you.

[00:05:12] Chelsey: it wasn't my fault. Well, now that I've gotten that off my chest in real time, I've lodged my complaint. I'd like to know What are you going to complain about today?

[00:05:21] Trey: This is a test of the emergency broadcasting system.

[00:05:28] Chelsey: Oh my God. Yes.

[00:05:31] Trey: I'm sorry that I, people so loud. My blood boy calls when that little monthly test goes off on my cable.

[00:05:41] Chelsey: It's very upsetting.

[00:05:42] Trey: is 2022. What is this test for? Like, okay. Maybe in the world today, like nuclear bombing is like, it's real again, but what my frustration is, I have no way to answer the test. Whoever is sending the test out.

[00:05:58] Trey: Doesn't know if someone is filling in that scan-tron bubble because. I not calling in to say, yes, you're interrupting Maury Povich. I like, it makes me crazy. Also today in 2022, we ha everyone has smartphones. Like,

[00:06:15] Chelsey: Nobody's relying on the cable television.

[00:06:18] Trey: do you remember when Trump was in office? And like, there was some random day where it was like, we got that little alert

[00:06:24] Chelsey: at office Depot. Everybody in there was in a total panic.

[00:06:28] Trey: like I turned it off a long time ago. Cause I guess I hate children, but there's also a feature on yes. On iPhones where it's like an Amber.

[00:06:36] Trey: alert will go to your phone. So I feel like that is so much more effective than these emergency broadcasting systems, which I didn't know. I've never heard it on the radio, but in researching this complaint, it goes to any sort of broadcast.

[00:06:51] Trey: So, but I've never heard it on a

[00:06:53] Chelsey: Yeah. I don't think I've ever heard it on the radio either. I mean, it is a little terrifying. It's kind of like, you know, the fire drill in when you're a kid, it's like, you hope the school's never on fire, but you still have to like, practice what you would do so that you don't all burn to death.

[00:07:09] Trey: Well, says that the emergency alert system is a national public warning system that requires radio and TV, broadcasters, cable, TV, wireless cable systems, satellite and wire line operators to provide the president with capability to address the American people. So I guess it. would be like breaking

[00:07:34] Chelsey: It will be like, stand by present is coming

[00:07:37] Trey: my question. Like I'm not against having the alerts like so that the president can get to us. I think it's a little outdated. I understand. Not everyone has a smartphone, but I feel like more people have smartphones than they have cable today.

[00:07:51] Chelsey: I don't know the stats on that.