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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 156: "Denver International Airport - 1 vs 5 Stars"

Review That Review with Chelsey & Trey
Episode 156: "Denver International Airport - 1 vs 5 Stars"


*Please pardon any and all spelling errors!

[00:00:00] CHELSEY DONN: I thought that that would be the obvious no because like why would this even be a question if it was C, no offense,

[00:00:05] TREY GERRALD: Oh.

[00:00:05] CHELSEY DONN: but

[00:00:09] TREY GERRALD: Damn, you got me, girl.

[00:00:14] THEME SONG: Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:42] CHELSEY DONN: Hello,

[00:00:44] TREY GERRALD: Hey, Chelsey, and hello, listeners. Hi. Hello out there. Hello. Welcome to Review That Review. We are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing.

[00:00:55] CHELSEY DONN: Reviews!

[00:00:57] TREY GERRALD: And we're angry about it! That's Chelsey Donn.

[00:01:01] CHELSEY DONN: And that's Trey Gerald.

[00:01:02] TREY GERRALD: when we come together on this show, we are your trustee.

[00:01:06] VOICEOVER: The review, Queens

[00:01:11] TREY GERRALD: just, I will never, I will never learn

[00:01:14] CHELSEY DONN: The beginning?

[00:01:15] TREY GERRALD: cue has the word the in it,

[00:01:17] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, it's

[00:01:17] TREY GERRALD: get creative.

[00:01:19] CHELSEY DONN: can get creative, Trey.

[00:01:20] TREY GERRALD: Thank you.

[00:01:21] CHELSEY DONN: But first, before we get started, Trey, I'm dying to know, would you like to

[00:01:27] VOICEOVER: Lodge a complaint.

[00:01:28] TREY GERRALD: I would. Chelsey,

[00:01:29] CHELSEY DONN: Lay it on me. Yes.

[00:01:31] TREY GERRALD: need everyone's interesting phrase you just said.

[00:01:34] CHELSEY DONN: Mm.

[00:01:34] TREY GERRALD: Today I need to lodge a complaint about Where is the proper position for your bedside table lamp? like symmetry, so I want my bedside table lamp to be in the center of the

[00:01:46] CHELSEY DONN: Mm.

[00:01:48] TREY GERRALD: if I put it in the fucking center, I have, like, a weird proportionate of space on either side, and nowadays, I am someone that charges my phone next to my head, which is probably, like, very bad, but, um, who cares, you only get one life, and when it ends, great, but I have to have my phone charger, right?

[00:02:05] TREY GERRALD: I also charge my iPad, Next to my bed because it's, you know, I'm usually on my iPad before I go to sleep. I do have a couple of books, don't always read, but I like to read every now and then, so I have, you know, three books that are sitting on my bedside table. I also have a box of Kleenex because sometimes I wake up and I'm thirsty.

[00:02:20] TREY GERRALD: It's like, what? Sometimes, that was my next

[00:02:23] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. Yes. Yes.

[00:02:24] TREY GERRALD: blow my nose, but I also have to have my glass of water. So there's a lot to negotiate. So I always have to push the lamp just on the precipice of falling off the bedside table on away from the bed. But then when you look at it, it's objectively wrong. That's wrong, that, that's wrong. So I guess sometimes people have like wall sconces or like

[00:02:45] CHELSEY DONN: Mm.

[00:02:46] TREY GERRALD: attach lights to the bed frame, but I just really want to lodge a complaint about the aesthetic of having the lamp where it's functional, Because if you follow functionality, you lose aesthetic. And that is terrible. I hate it. I want the lamp in the center. Also it's plugged into Alexa. So I don't even need to access the switch because I just vocally say the command and it goes off,

[00:03:11] CHELSEY DONN: The command.

[00:03:13] TREY GERRALD: a bedside table to have a lamp because it feels, A little dreamy rather than like overhead lights.

[00:03:19] TREY GERRALD: That's my complaint. There's really no solution. There is no solution to this problem. There's not. There's no solution, but I'm bringing it as a complaint. Chelsey, you nodded several times in that. Tell me what's there for you.

[00:03:30] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. I was nodding several times while you were saying that because I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Queen, like literal same. I have books next to my bed. I have

[00:03:40] TREY GERRALD: them?

[00:03:41] CHELSEY DONN: only in a power outage, a

[00:03:45] TREY GERRALD: light? You can't use

[00:03:46] CHELSEY DONN: With a flashlight,

[00:03:47] TREY GERRALD: okay. Yeah.

[00:03:48] CHELSEY DONN: because otherwise I'm probably watching TV, let's be honest, but, but anyway, point is, yes, I feel you, I need, I also need the tissues, I also need the beverage, I, like, I, I also have the phone right next to me, like, you need all those things, and so baby gets pushed in a corner,

[00:04:03] TREY GERRALD: Is that, that's what you've done with your lamp

[00:04:05] CHELSEY DONN: 100 percent and I've tried like other things, like right now I have it like I put my lamp inside of like a tray and then that way I can kind of push the lamp towards the corner of the whole thing towards the corner if I need more space, but like it's still, I agree with you, like it's never gonna meet the aesthetic that I want, the aesthetic and necessity of the bedside, the whole area, because now I have shelves too, they're just never gonna add up.

[00:04:31] CHELSEY DONN: Storage is always gonna win over function, and I'm gonna just like have a pile of shit that I need,

[00:04:36] TREY GERRALD: Always, right?

[00:04:37] CHELSEY DONN: yeah,

[00:04:38] TREY GERRALD: drawers that just have random stuff

[00:04:39] CHELSEY DONN: same,

[00:04:40] TREY GERRALD: I could put the

[00:04:40] CHELSEY DONN: same, I know, Queens, is this a problem that you face? Let us know, 1 850 REVIEW ZERO,

[00:04:47] TREY GERRALD: Help us shed some light on it, please.

[00:04:49] CHELSEY DONN: gotta know what to do with the lamps,

[00:04:51] TREY GERRALD: Chelsey, since we are in agreement there,

[00:04:53] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.

[00:04:54] TREY GERRALD: head to head on a

[00:04:56] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my goodness. We must. Let's do it.

[00:05:00] VOICEOVER: Assess that ke.

[00:05:02] TREY GERRALD: Well, Queens, today is another Versus episode, which means Chelsey and I will both be covering a one star review and a five star review on the same exact topic,

[00:05:11] CHELSEY DONN: That's right. For this versus episode, Trey has selected the one star and I have selected the five star. Woo. So to determine who reads first, we got to flip that quarter. I'm going to say heads.

[00:05:27] TREY GERRALD: oh no, it's tails,

[00:05:28] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, great. It's okay. Why is that a no no? That's not a no no. That just means that we're going to hear the one star here on the main show.

[00:05:36] CHELSEY DONN: And if you want to hear the five star, which I got to say is a very interesting review, you have to hop on over to Patreon.

[00:05:43] TREY GERRALD: okay, so, let me just share with you a little bit about today's topic, so, at the time of this recording, there are 43, 846 reviews on Google, With an average score of 4. 1 out of 5, which is actually pretty high,

[00:05:58] CHELSEY DONN: That's great. Yeah.

[00:05:59] TREY GERRALD: Chelsey's review is from Yelp, which at the time of this recording, there's 3, 936 Yelp reviews, and their average score is 3.

[00:06:10] TREY GERRALD: 3 out of 5.

[00:06:10] CHELSEY DONN: Quite a difference.

[00:06:12] TREY GERRALD: can I just go into the

[00:06:12] CHELSEY DONN: You know, it's like 4. 1. I'm going 3. 3. I'm suspicious.

[00:06:17] TREY GERRALD: But who's ever happy out of the airport? That's the question. If you're happy, you might, something might be wrong with you.

[00:06:22] CHELSEY DONN: If you're happy at the airport, clap your hands. I don't hear anything.

[00:06:27] TREY GERRALD: Me either. No claps. Alright, so according to the quote unquote About Den page on the

[00:06:34] CHELSEY DONN: Interesting.

[00:06:35] TREY GERRALD: Airport website, Since opening in 1995, Denver International Airport, parentheses D E N, although I think in the past it was D I A, And they're trying to rebrand.

[00:06:47] TREY GERRALD: We'll get into my speculation later. The Denver International Airport has become one of the world's busiest airports. Listen to these stats. In the year 2023, Denver welcomed a record breaking 77. 8 million passengers, which was a 12. 3 percent increase over the previous year. So this is all post COVID numbers. Crazy.

[00:07:11] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah.

[00:07:12] TREY GERRALD: airport is Colorado's primary economic engine. It generates 36. 4 billion in annual economic impact for the state of Colorado. What?

[00:07:26] CHELSEY DONN: That's a lot of money. I wonder what it is for other states. I'm so curious. That's a lot of money.

[00:07:30] TREY GERRALD: So now just to like imagine how large it must be, think of this. The airport operates on 53 square miles of land. I don't know what that means. So here's a visual. The Denver International Airport's area is twice. The size of Manhattan,

[00:07:44] CHELSEY DONN: Wow. Stop.

[00:07:46] TREY GERRALD: the city boundaries of Boston, Miami, or San Francisco. Now, okay, now think of other airports. In terms of airports, the Hartsville Jackson Airport, Chicago's O'Hare, Los Angeles International, and the Dallas Fort Worth Airport, Could collectively fit into Den's expansive property. That's how fucking large this airport is.

[00:08:11] CHELSEY DONN: That's insane.

[00:08:13] TREY GERRALD: So to me, I just feel like there's no way anyone's gonna be happy because it's too big, too much can happen

[00:08:18] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah.

[00:08:19] TREY GERRALD: Speaking of According to the quote unquote conspiracy theories section on Denver International Airports Wikipedia page.

[00:08:28] CHELSEY DONN: Wow, okay.

[00:08:29] TREY GERRALD: Conspiracies concerning the airport started shortly after its completion due to the type of art, unusual architecture, and various construction problems. So this is a whole rabbit hole we could go down, which we're not really going to, but these are just some of the notable theories as written up on the Wikipedia page.

[00:08:49] TREY GERRALD: Tunnels. The delay in the opening of the airport and the large budget overrun led to a variety of rumors about all those tunnels that were built The airport. Remember, this is 53 square miles of land

[00:09:05] CHELSEY DONN: Wow.

[00:09:06] TREY GERRALD: underneath. So there's lore that the tunnels lead to underground survival bunkers for the rich and the elite, military bases, homes for aliens,

[00:09:15] CHELSEY DONN: for aliens. Yeah, gotta have aliens.

[00:09:18] TREY GERRALD: Homes for Lizard People.

[00:09:20] CHELSEY DONN: What? Oh my god. That's a whole nother rabbit hole. We could talk about that on the, on the after show.

[00:09:25] TREY GERRALD: according to Wikipedia, the actual use for the tunnels is to move luggage between check in counters, airplanes,

[00:09:31] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.

[00:09:32] TREY GERRALD: claim areas. You know, Disney World and Disneyland notoriously have these underground tunnels as well.

[00:09:37] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. What? Oh wow.

[00:09:42] TREY GERRALD: there's a time capsule that's at the airport and it showcases an inscribed plaque that has the Freemason symbol and the words quote, New World Airport Commission, which prompted, you know, a bunch of conspiracy theories that the airport is controlled by Freemasons and linked to the New World Order and other secret societies.

[00:10:01] TREY GERRALD: But, uh, But according to Wikipedia, a spokesperson for the Denver International Airport said the Freemasons created the plaque and thus included their symbol, but there is no evidence that they have any influence in running the airport. And then the wording of about the commission, New World, was used to represent that the new airport would permit access to the world and as a reference to Dvorak's, New World Symphony, okay. Two more notable conspiracies that we'll just quickly cover. A lot of alien language is apparently inside the airport, people have noted that the apparent markings that are supposed to represent alien are secret languages. Wikipedia debunks it by saying the markings are actually Navajo language characters and identifiers for the airport artists. And then lastly, most famous, there's a statue in front of the airport, and that is a blue Mustang and his red eyes. The red glowing eyes have led some to call the horse statue demonic. Thinking that the glowing eyes are referencing the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. The eyes, according to Wikipedia, are actually a tribute to the artist's father, who owned a neon light shop in Mexico. So, Denver International Airport gets dark, it gets dicey, there's a lot going on, it's obviously ginormous, and um, I've never been, have you ever been?

[00:11:21] CHELSEY DONN: I was gonna say, I have flown in there once, but anyway, Trey,

[00:11:25] TREY GERRALD: Yeah,

[00:11:25] CHELSEY DONN: we gotta hear some of the miserable experiences at this airport, apparently, so, that was where you spent your week, so tell us about the one star,

[00:11:34] TREY GERRALD: yeah, so with all that background info, let me share with you the one star that I decided to share today, because lord knows I have an entire filing cabinet of one stars to choose from.

[00:11:44] CHELSEY DONN: oh wow, yeah, I've been there,

[00:11:51] TREY GERRALD: So today, I'm going to be sharing with you Alex R's one star Google review for the Denver International Airport.

[00:11:59] CHELSEY DONN: alright, Alex, let's hear it, ahaha!

[00:12:02] TREY GERRALD: months ago. Here. We. Go. Kevin! And the United baggage claim lost and found is disgusting. He is extremely rude, nasty, and disrespectful to women. What a sad, lonely, miserable little man. be so foul and disrespectful to people during the holidays and time in this world, space, comma, space. It's baffling, a quote unquote manager shouldn't be so ugly to people coming to him for help. Instead of trying to work with me, a pregnant, tired

[00:12:47] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, wow, hmm,

[00:12:51] TREY GERRALD: proceeded to accuse me of making a bizarre conspiracy to steal my own property, LOL! It was so strange and WEIRD, like he LIVES for keeping people's things or having some sort of quote unquote mediocre low paying pal. Also threatened me when I told him I will be filing a police report on him. He said quote, I wouldn't do that. You'll be sorry, quote, dot, dot, dot. To threaten a pregnant woman, he has to be going through some sort of crisis in his life. aren't men these days. I'll pray for him. He is a thief that is withholding my property. To get some sort of, quote, unquote, high salary. Off his small, and feel good about himself.

[00:14:06] CHELSEY DONN: wow,

[00:14:06] TREY GERRALD: two thumbs up!

[00:14:08] CHELSEY DONN: wow, Alex, okay, okay, so Kevin at the top, lol, oh my god, love, reference to Home Alone 2, my favorite, Home Alone 1, she screams too,

[00:14:21] TREY GERRALD: I don't think, I don't think Alex is making reference. Just FYI. It just says Kevin in all caps.

[00:14:27] CHELSEY DONN: she's making reference.

[00:14:29] TREY GERRALD: I think the guy's name is Kevin. So she's saying Kevin and the United Baggage Claim.

[00:14:34] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, so that was your reading,

[00:14:36] TREY GERRALD: That was my interpretation. Sorry.

[00:14:38] CHELSEY DONN: great, great read, Trey.

[00:14:40] TREY GERRALD: But we can give it to Kevin. I mean, we can give it to Alex.

[00:14:42] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, that's hilarious. Okay, maybe they were, maybe they weren't, but I was, I, it makes more sense if they weren't because it wasn't connected to anything else in the review, but it was still such a great moment, and I really appreciate you doing it,

[00:14:55] TREY GERRALD: I also can foresee

[00:14:56] CHELSEY DONN: a video,

[00:14:57] TREY GERRALD: you're gonna

[00:14:58] CHELSEY DONN: I'm automatically doing, like, yes, I'm doing it, of course, yeah, Avi, also, yes, Who was the person that's disrespectful? They're the manager of baggage claim. Is that right?

[00:15:12] TREY GERRALD: That's what it seems like. Yeah.

[00:15:14] CHELSEY DONN: I will say even though we're like a little complaining maybe a little cray We're getting the police. I feel for Alex Because this is around the holidays, right?

[00:15:28] TREY GERRALD: Yeah.

[00:15:29] CHELSEY DONN: So that's like the hardest time in the airport. I get it. Like again, this is a crisis person.

[00:15:35] CHELSEY DONN: This is who's gonna receive the brunt of everybody's anger when something is lost or whatever.

[00:15:41] TREY GERRALD: Mm

[00:15:41] CHELSEY DONN: But if they're not like a cool person or they're not on board to help you, that's it. Like you're in purgatory. There's nothing you can do. This is the only person whose job it is to help you in this situation.

[00:15:53] CHELSEY DONN: Now, they were wearing their watch in the airport and then they took it off for like security, like do we have context of how they lost the watch?

[00:16:02] TREY GERRALD: No. But if it's through baggage claim, I would assume it wasn't in their bag.

[00:16:08] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, I don't know. Do you think that they're that Alex is like trying to be a martyr by continuing to say like Pregnant tired or do we just think that they're a freaking pregnant tired mother and they've had enough?

[00:16:23] TREY GERRALD: it's interesting to me because the fact that Alex is pregnant does have a large

[00:16:29] CHELSEY DONN: Yes,

[00:16:30] TREY GERRALD: the way this lands for

[00:16:31] CHELSEY DONN: agree.

[00:16:31] TREY GERRALD: If we were going to try to deduce, like, if Alex wasn't pregnant, would they

[00:16:36] CHELSEY DONN: Have this reaction

[00:16:37] TREY GERRALD: right? But the facts here are that, I guess, the watch is missing. They went to speak to the manager, and the manager isn't helping, and then is going even further and accusing them of like, you're pretending that it's still, like, I don't understand, and then, threatening?

[00:16:56] CHELSEY DONN: like I'm so convinced in the narrative that you never had a watch or you whatever, and you're trying to pull a fast one on the airport that go ahead and call the police because they're gonna realize that you're a criminal and take your pregnant ass away. Like what are they? Yeah

[00:17:14] TREY GERRALD: lodging a record that an item is missing. How does it then get into taunting, and, they really are going in hard on, Mediocre, low paying, small man. I definitely think Alex is Southern. I'm gonna give you two examples. say men aren't men these days.

[00:17:30] TREY GERRALD: That sounds like a country music lyric. I don't think abroad from the Bronx is gonna make that claim.

[00:17:38] CHELSEY DONN: good catch

[00:17:39] TREY GERRALD: saying, they shouldn't be so ugly to people. Now that is a phrase straight out of my mother's

[00:17:44] CHELSEY DONN: Really? Okay.

[00:17:46] TREY GERRALD: ever described a nasty person as being ugly to people, being ugly to

[00:17:50] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think so.

[00:17:52] TREY GERRALD: Do you understand it though

[00:17:54] CHELSEY DONN: understand it, but I don't think that that would I think I would probably like they were a bitch Or they were an asshole

[00:17:59] TREY GERRALD: So my mom used to always say, quit being ugly, or she would say, quit showing your ass.

[00:18:05] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, yeah,

[00:18:06] TREY GERRALD: so ugly.

[00:18:06] CHELSEY DONN: yeah,

[00:18:07] TREY GERRALD: talks so ugly to me,

[00:18:09] CHELSEY DONN: yeah, yeah,

[00:18:10] TREY GERRALD: like very southern. So I'm feeling triggered.

[00:18:12] CHELSEY DONN: okay,

[00:18:13] TREY GERRALD: But at the end of the day, this is a pregnant woman who has lost an item and we have procedures in place to go to the management, file a report, and that should be

[00:18:21] CHELSEY DONN: and another Southern is um, pray for him,

[00:18:25] TREY GERRALD: I'm going to pray for him. Yep.

[00:18:27] CHELSEY DONN: yeah,

[00:18:27] TREY GERRALD: Wait, I have a

[00:18:28] CHELSEY DONN: yeah,

[00:18:29] TREY GERRALD: Are you allowed to use those teeny little, like, padlocks on your bags anymore? Or are you not allowed because TSA can't get in your bag?

[00:18:36] CHELSEY DONN: I think you're allowed, but I think I could be wrong, I think it has to be some sort of like a newer lock that has like a bottom and like they have a universal key,

[00:18:44] TREY GERRALD: So they can open

[00:18:45] CHELSEY DONN: That they can get into it, but it's like only the airport,

[00:18:48] TREY GERRALD: So then you shouldn't fly with valuables. what if

[00:18:51] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I think you wouldn't think that if a professional was gonna open your bag that they would steal something from you because I would think that there would be cameras, I would think that like,

[00:19:01] TREY GERRALD: that,

[00:19:02] CHELSEY DONN: yeah, point is, Alex is definitely missing pieces of the storytelling, I would think

[00:19:07] TREY GERRALD: Right. And they're filling it with describing how pregnant they are.

[00:19:11] CHELSEY DONN: With the pregnant and they're filling it with like this person is just a jerk and they're misogynist and they're whatever and we're missing pieces of information about how the watch got lost, which is critical.

[00:19:22] TREY GERRALD: And also, if we're talking about the unique, valuable information, is a United Airlines baggage claim, lost and found representative. So, is this really telling me anything about Denver?

[00:19:35] CHELSEY DONN: Thank you for bringing us back there. I don't know. I think it's complicated because when else are you going to be at the airport unless you've flown on an airline? You know what I mean? So like, I don't know. Like, can we say this is the wrong place for the review? I don't know. Because it's about an airline worker, the only other place you could leave it would be like, TrustPilot, under United Airlines, or going on Twitter and like, putting this guy on blast on United, which some people do, it's hard, I think it's tough, you know,

[00:20:05] TREY GERRALD: of who's at fault here, it is odd to me that it's missing, and then Alex ends by claiming that Kevin is responsible.

[00:20:15] CHELSEY DONN: why didn't they call the police? What's to stop them from calling the police?

[00:20:20] TREY GERRALD: I mean, I don't know. I've never called the police.

[00:20:23] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I think if you really are like, I need to speak to someone, my watch like, was stolen, and, um, You're only being hit with like no you're faking it or no you stole it or no I'm not gonna look into that for you And you're like let me speak to your supervisor, and they're like I am the messiah of the DMV to quote clueless

[00:20:44] TREY GERRALD: I think the point here, again, is we're missing details

[00:20:48] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:20:49] TREY GERRALD: was it on Alex's wrist? Was it in Alex's bag?

[00:20:52] CHELSEY DONN: right,

[00:20:53] TREY GERRALD: it was in the bag because it's baggage claim lost and found. Is there just a little Rolex box that

[00:20:59] CHELSEY DONN: right,

[00:20:59] TREY GERRALD: through baggage claim that's disappeared? Like, I don't understand what's happening.

[00:21:02] CHELSEY DONN: right, are they saying that like Alex just knows that there is a bin here of watches in Lost and Found so they're just gonna be like I left my watch like you could go to any gym and be like I Left my black headphones here

[00:21:16] TREY GERRALD: right.

[00:21:17] CHELSEY DONN: you know, get a pair of headphones.

[00:21:19] TREY GERRALD: I mean, spelling grammar is basically fine.

[00:21:22] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.

[00:21:22] TREY GERRALD: a lot of all caps. believe they

[00:21:25] CHELSEY DONN: be sorry.

[00:21:28] TREY GERRALD: they definitely did a pass for typos, that's a lot of quotes too, truthful shady, I

[00:21:34] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, mediocre, low, low paying, power, small job, big, whatever attitude.

[00:21:43] TREY GERRALD: right,

[00:21:44] CHELSEY DONN: of it all. It's a little shady. Men aren't men these days.

[00:21:47] TREY GERRALD: pray for him,

[00:21:48] CHELSEY DONN: I'll pray for him. We're definitely throwing in shade, for sure.

[00:21:52] TREY GERRALD: sure.

[00:21:53] CHELSEY DONN: Common?

[00:21:54] TREY GERRALD: I don't know.

[00:21:56] CHELSEY DONN: I think so. I mean, especially at such a large airport when we're going through that list of all the facts and how it's, whatever, three times bigger than Manhattan or whatever you were saying.

[00:22:06] CHELSEY DONN: And I think at a space that big, people probably lose things a lot.

[00:22:10] TREY GERRALD: And I would imagine that if you are Kevin and you're working in the

[00:22:13] CHELSEY DONN: Kevin!

[00:22:14] TREY GERRALD: and found baggage, you're going to be dealing with people that are exceedingly angry. But I don't think that's a justification for being extremely rude, nasty, disrespectful, lonely, sad, miserable, ugly.

[00:22:27] CHELSEY DONN: agree.

[00:22:27] TREY GERRALD: That's a tough

[00:22:28] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, that is a tough job, but

[00:22:30] TREY GERRALD: was definitely entertained.

[00:22:32] TREY GERRALD: And

[00:22:32] CHELSEY DONN: I was entertained.

[00:22:33] TREY GERRALD: trigger points for me. But

[00:22:36] CHELSEY DONN: Steal my own property?

[00:22:38] TREY GERRALD: what is the impact here? Is this a deal breaker for me? I don't. I've, I don't know, does this represent the Denver Airport?

[00:22:45] CHELSEY DONN: No. This isn't giving me any real information about like what I want to know is like the trudgery of it all, the like I miss my flight because this place is like a million miles long and give yourselves four hours to get through because What? I don't know. Like I want like details that are really universal and this is like a crisis that I don't want to say couldn't happen to anybody.

[00:23:08] CHELSEY DONN: I think it could, but because of the lack of specificity, it's really not helping me to be like, Oh, I need to like be careful in this circumstance or I would adjust my behavior in this way to not have happened to me what happened to Alex. I don't know what I would change.

[00:23:26] TREY GERRALD: I mean, my impact is if I'm pregnant, I'm not going to wear a watch and fly United.

[00:23:30] CHELSEY DONN: I guess.

[00:23:31] TREY GERRALD: the Denver airport? I don't know. I think I could crown.

[00:23:34] CHELSEY DONN: I think I can crown Alex. Let's do it.

[00:23:35] TREY GERRALD: But, before we do, Chelsey, it's time for a game! So, Chelsey, what is the game today?

[00:23:42] CHELSEY DONN: All right. So this game is, do you know the airport codes? Okay, Trey, this is a bit of a challenging one, my friend, but I'm going to ask you some questions based on an online quiz that I found about airport codes. And you know what I mean by airport codes, right? Like LAX, LAX, LAX, LAX.

[00:24:04] TREY GERRALD: abbreviations

[00:24:05] CHELSEY DONN: EWR for Newark, giving you a couple hints.

[00:24:09] TREY GERRALD: yeah. Wait, so are these airport codes or are they airport abbreviations?

[00:24:13] CHELSEY DONN: called airport codes. They're called, yes, they're called airport codes. So

[00:24:18] TREY GERRALD: oh boy,

[00:24:19] CHELSEY DONN: here we go.

[00:24:20] TREY GERRALD: been to a lot of places, so, you're,

[00:24:22] CHELSEY DONN: It's okay. And it's multiple choice. So like you always have a 25 percent chance of getting it right and a 75 percent chance of getting it wrong. Here we go. Yeah.

[00:24:33] TREY GERRALD: I'm paying for that Senior Frogs game,

[00:24:36] CHELSEY DONN: Right. Okay. Here we go. Try. The majority of Canadian airport codes start with which letter? Is it C? H, or P? Now, I will give you two 50 50s, like millionaire rules. If you're like, I have no idea, I'd like you to reduce this to 50%, I will honor that for you twice, okay?

[00:25:09] TREY GERRALD: alright, well, it seems like the obvious answer would be C, cause they're Canadian flights, I don't know why it would be Y, or H, What was the other one?

[00:25:20] CHELSEY DONN: P.

[00:25:20] TREY GERRALD: P. Like the province? I don't know, I, I have no idea, so I'm, I think I'm just gonna go with A. They start with C. Oh no.

[00:25:30] CHELSEY DONN: I thought that that would be the obvious no, because like, why would this even be a question if it was C? No offense.

[00:25:40] TREY GERRALD: you got me, girl! Wait, wait, okay,

[00:25:44] CHELSEY DONN: the answer, okay, okay,

[00:25:46] TREY GERRALD: Still not P, okay.

[00:25:48] CHELSEY DONN: I'll give you, I can give you two guesses, moving forward, this is a hard game, so I'll give you two guesses,

[00:25:53] TREY GERRALD: no, it's fine. Just

[00:25:54] CHELSEY DONN: okay, okay, I'll give you, if they get it on the second guess, you get a half point, okay, so the answer is, Why?

[00:26:02] TREY GERRALD: What the fuck?

[00:26:03] CHELSEY DONN: I had to look, I was like, why? Why, why? And so apparently in like the 1930s, when I, you know, airlines were traveling, they needed to know whether or not there was a weather radio station on location at the airport.

[00:26:19] CHELSEY DONN: And if you had one, like Canada did, it would say, why? For yes, we do have a weather radio station. And so because of that, since the 30s, a lot of their codes just were why something because they had this thing. So they just kept it. So that was, that was the difficult one. So

[00:26:38] TREY GERRALD: Alright,

[00:26:39] CHELSEY DONN: Trey. Okay. In 2021,

[00:26:42] TREY GERRALD: mm

[00:26:42] CHELSEY DONN: eight of the 10 busiest airports in the world by passenger numbers were in the USA. Which of these was the number one busiest, was it? A T L L A S D E N A X.

[00:27:09] TREY GERRALD: in the US, okay, so

[00:27:11] CHELSEY DONN: Mm hmm.

[00:27:12] TREY GERRALD: I think it's Las Vegas, Denver, or Los Angeles International,

[00:27:17] CHELSEY DONN: I can give you a half point for that.

[00:27:20] TREY GERRALD: well I think that in my research for this episode Denver was the number one, busiest,

[00:27:24] CHELSEY DONN: By passenger numbers.

[00:27:27] TREY GERRALD: well Denver is fucking huge, so I'm just gonna go with Denver, I'm gonna say that it's Denver, no, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,

[00:27:36] CHELSEY DONN: All right, take your second guess.

[00:27:38] TREY GERRALD: LAX, it's Hollywood, Atlanta, wow,

[00:27:47] CHELSEY DONN: We'll give you a quarter of a point, Trey. Yeah! I

[00:27:51] TREY GERRALD: okay,

[00:27:53] CHELSEY DONN: know! Okay, isn't that interesting? I mean, I don't know why Atlantide didn't look up the details, sorry, but it's Atlanta. Okay, O M G is the airport code for which city? Is it Omaha, Nebraska, Japan, Russia, or is it Omega, Namibia?

[00:28:22] TREY GERRALD: I don't think it's Omaha, I think it's Japan, I think

[00:28:25] CHELSEY DONN: You think it's Japan?

[00:28:27] VOICEOVER: You

[00:28:33] TREY GERRALD: whatever C was,

[00:28:36] CHELSEY DONN: Omsk, Russia?

[00:28:39] TREY GERRALD: okay, the last one,

[00:28:45] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. Omega Namibia, which I can't even say, is OMG. Okay. Okay. This is, this is hopefully an easier one. I'm hoping.

[00:28:57] TREY GERRALD: this to me,

[00:28:59] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Okay. What's the airport code if you're flying to Dubai international airport? Okay. Dubai international. Is it H X D U B, D, X, B, or D, B, I, Dubai International Airport,

[00:29:34] TREY GERRALD: feel like you're really trying to lead me by stressing international.

[00:29:38] CHELSEY DONN: I know, but it's only if you know like what international usually is in a code.

[00:29:44] TREY GERRALD: Well, I would think it's I, but I don't think it's DBI, I think it's X for some reason, like LAX, although Denver International doesn't have an X and that's international. But A TL is an international, but it doesn't have an X, but I do think it's X. So I'm gonna say DX, B. Was that C?

[00:30:02] CHELSEY DONN: DXV is correct! that was sick. Good job, Trey. Wow. which of the following, Trey, is not This is not a code for a London Airport, LGW, LHR, or LCY, and I want to point out you're 5 in and you've not used your 50 50, so if you want to use it, it's on the table, you can use it twice.

[00:30:33] TREY GERRALD: Well, I think that London, Heathrow is LHR, but I'm just making that up. I don't know what the Y would be. gonna ask for a 50

[00:30:41] CHELSEY DONN: Okay,

[00:30:42] TREY GERRALD: I shouldn't have told you what I was negating.

[00:30:45] CHELSEY DONN: okay, I'm going to tell you that, I'll throw you a bone, Trey. It's either going to be LHR or LBA,

[00:30:54] TREY GERRALD: Which one is

[00:30:55] CHELSEY DONN: which is not, and I'm going to say, trust, trust your gut, trust your gut, Trey,

[00:31:00] TREY GERRALD: Well, that's cheating.

[00:31:02] CHELSEY DONN: no, you deduce that on your own, I didn't tell you anything,

[00:31:05] TREY GERRALD: one is not?

[00:31:07] CHELSEY DONN: is not,

[00:31:08] TREY GERRALD: Well, it's got to be LBA.

[00:31:11] CHELSEY DONN: That's right. LBA actually stands for Leads Bradford Airport, which is in Leeds. Great job. Okay, here we go. What is the airport code for Washington DC's? Dulles International.

[00:31:26] TREY GERRALD: to Dulles. Okay.

[00:31:27] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Is it W-D-I-D-U-L-W-A-S or IAD. Dulles International?

[00:31:42] TREY GERRALD: I kind of think it's IAD. Wait, that

[00:31:46] CHELSEY DONN: Yes,

[00:31:46] TREY GERRALD: so

[00:31:46] CHELSEY DONN: Trey, you got it.

[00:31:49] TREY GERRALD: Thank you, Caitlin Groner, for getting married and making me fly through Dulles

[00:31:53] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my goodness! Look at that! You are really picking up speed and I'm about to throw you a bone, are you ready? you fly into LAX,

[00:32:02] TREY GERRALD: Hop

[00:32:03] CHELSEY DONN: and

[00:32:04] TREY GERRALD: LAX. San

[00:32:05] CHELSEY DONN: then you get out SFO. American state have you just traveled through? Is it Texas, Washington, Florida, or California?

[00:32:22] TREY GERRALD: Well, it's definitely California.

[00:32:25] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, that was a bone. I threw you a bone because I was like, this is getting hard, this game. Okay, here we go. You're planning a fun trip to FUN.

[00:32:34] TREY GERRALD: Oh no.

[00:32:35] CHELSEY DONN: are you visiting? Florida, Tuvalu, Finland, or Madeira?

[00:32:46] TREY GERRALD: What? Two Ballou. What's two? Ballou? don't

[00:32:50] CHELSEY DONN: Maybe you should lean into.

[00:32:52] TREY GERRALD: I don't think that that's Florida. 'cause I've

[00:32:54] CHELSEY DONN: Okay,

[00:32:55] TREY GERRALD: many of the airports in Florida. Couldn't

[00:32:56] CHELSEY DONN: okay,

[00:32:57] TREY GERRALD: but two Ballou. That sounds like Zoo Zoo.

[00:33:01] CHELSEY DONN: pretty much.

[00:33:02] TREY GERRALD: Tubaloo. I don't know. I'm gonna take your little bone and I'm gonna say Tubaloo.

[00:33:09] CHELSEY DONN: Tuvalu! That is

[00:33:11] TREY GERRALD: What

[00:33:12] CHELSEY DONN: right, Trey! Tuvalu is an island country in the West Central Pacific Ocean. It sits about halfway between Australia and Hawaii.

[00:33:20] TREY GERRALD: Fun.

[00:33:20] CHELSEY DONN: We should go to Tuvalu. Okay,

[00:33:22] TREY GERRALD: sure it'll be cheap.

[00:33:23] CHELSEY DONN: you're really turning this around. Which South American city Would you be visiting if you were flying to EZE, Buenos Aires, Caracas, or would you be visiting Rio de Janeiro?

[00:33:46] TREY GERRALD: I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna say Rio de Janeiro.

[00:33:51] CHELSEY DONN: Half point, you could get a half point,

[00:33:54] TREY GERRALD: Caracas?

[00:33:58] CHELSEY DONN: you could get a quarter point,

[00:34:01] TREY GERRALD: Lima? Oh, come on.

[00:34:05] CHELSEY DONN: it's Buenos Aires,


[00:34:08] CHELSEY DONN: okay, no.


[00:34:11] CHELSEY DONN: exactly. Okay, Tokyo has two main international airports, is the code for the first, but which of these is the code for the second? So we're looking for the second airport in Tokyo, not NRT. Is it E D O T K Y? O S A or H N D?

[00:34:42] TREY GERRALD: I have a 50

[00:34:43] CHELSEY DONN: Do a 50 50. Okay. So is it D O or H N D?

[00:34:50] TREY GERRALD: well, I was gonna say O. S. A. because of Osaka, so I'm glad I didn't go with that.

[00:34:55] CHELSEY DONN: E D O. HND.

[00:34:58] TREY GERRALD: I just, I literally have no idea, so, say, I'm not saying this, I wanna say H and D because it looks like hand, but, I'm

[00:35:06] CHELSEY DONN: Mm-Hmm.

[00:35:06] TREY GERRALD: D.

[00:35:07] CHELSEY DONN: Mm-Hmm. . Mm mm-Hmm.

[00:35:09] TREY GERRALD: oh, I already guessed wrong. It's hand?

[00:35:15] CHELSEY DONN: yep. It stands for Anita Airport in Tokyo. Tre, you really did well, I have one more bonus for you that is gonna take you for sure to the win. So here we go.

[00:35:27] TREY GERRALD: even, I'm five wrong, five right.

[00:35:29] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. So this, this is for the win. Okay. Which of these, and this is something just I'll give you a little extra time to think about this. Which of these is not an airport for a European capital city?

[00:35:46] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, C D G M D L E. HR, which you should know,

[00:35:58] TREY GERRALD: hmm.

[00:36:00] CHELSEY DONN: or FAO capital cities. Which of these is not an airport code for European Capital City?

[00:36:09] TREY GERRALD: we know that LHR, and thank

[00:36:12] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.

[00:36:12] TREY GERRALD: it, is Is London,

[00:36:16] CHELSEY DONN: Yes, and which is the capital of England. Yeah,

[00:36:20] TREY GERRALD: I'm going to say F A O, final answer. Wait, really?

[00:36:24] CHELSEY DONN: you're right. Oh my goodness. Yeah, you won the game. So CDG stands for Paris Charles de Gaulle Airport, which is Paris, France, the capital. MAD is Madrid and that is the capital of Spain.

[00:36:40] TREY GERRALD: duh.

[00:36:42] CHELSEY DONN: FAO is Faro, Portugal, which is not the capital city, which is Lisbon,

[00:36:48] TREY GERRALD: Pretty.

[00:36:49] CHELSEY DONN: Trey, that was a really hard game and you did very well,

[00:36:54] TREY GERRALD: Well,

[00:36:55] CHELSEY DONN: impressed,

[00:36:56] TREY GERRALD: life is all about grinning and bearing it.

[00:36:59] CHELSEY DONN: you did freaking

[00:37:01] TREY GERRALD: Just like

[00:37:02] CHELSEY DONN: phenomenal,

[00:37:03] TREY GERRALD: codes mean.

[00:37:04] CHELSEY DONN: I have marked down here that you have seven points with your like little halvesies,

[00:37:08] TREY GERRALD: I forgot about all that. Well, thank you. I, I feel

[00:37:11] CHELSEY DONN: you're a winner queen,

[00:37:12] TREY GERRALD: feel like I could conquer the world

[00:37:15] CHELSEY DONN: yes, you can, of these airport codes,

[00:37:19] TREY GERRALD: right.

[00:37:19] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. Condragulations, Trey. You are a winner.

[00:37:24] TREY GERRALD: By the skin of my teeth.

[00:37:30] VOICEOVER: Review That Review,

[00:37:34] TREY GERRALD: All

[00:37:35] CHELSEY DONN: right.

[00:37:35] TREY GERRALD: let's crown. Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards and an effort to be fair and not influence each other. We will simultaneously reveal pregnant Alex's rating.

[00:37:48] VOICEOVER: The Queens are tabulating, Total Score,

[00:37:54] CHELSEY DONN: Interesting. I don't know why I'm holding up two and a half crowns, but I am. I'm holding up two and a half crowns. Trey is holding up one crown. I think I gave inflation for the pregnant thing. I want to say maybe there's a lot of hormones going on. We're especially emotional. I do think that that's hard.

[00:38:10] CHELSEY DONN: Sounds like we're traveling alone. Two and a half crowns because this does sound like one of those miserable airport experiences where if this Did happen in real life to anyone. I'd be like, fuck, that sucks. Especially if it happened to you when you were pregnant, you just want somebody to handle the issue

[00:38:24] TREY GERRALD: Right.

[00:38:24] CHELSEY DONN: they're not.

[00:38:25] CHELSEY DONN: And so if I'm taking Alex at her word, I'm going to give her two and a half crowns. The two and a half crowns are taken away because I don't know if I can take Alex at their word. I don't know if this is. A hundred percent accurate if we're misinterpreting the situation at hand and really how this applies to the overall airport and if it helps me in any way adjust my behavior.

[00:38:46] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think it does. So that was why I only went with two and a half crowns, but you only went with one crown. So let us know why.

[00:38:52] TREY GERRALD: I'm just giving Alex the one. Also, for being pregnant, I'm feeling like there's a little bit of, um, there's a little bit of reality that's lacking somewhere in here, and that I could have believed it a little stronger if there was more full rounded storytelling. I don't know how the watch was lost, I don't know where

[00:39:12] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.

[00:39:13] TREY GERRALD: came from, and I, Now, I also recognize it's going to be really challenging to be pregnant.

[00:39:17] TREY GERRALD: And if you do feel like you're being disrespected and you're a pregnant woman, like that's really like, I understand. I just don't know what about the impact and deal breaking nature having read this. I also don't, I don't know that leaving this on the Denver page is right. Cause it's unite. I don't know.

[00:39:33] TREY GERRALD: It's perplexing. If I had this experience, I don't even know where I would, I would turn, you know, to like, air it i think i would go to twitter but two people found it helpful but ultimately i don't think i'm learning more about denver international airport and i don't know but come on one star for alex

[00:39:50] CHELSEY DONN: I really enjoyed the Home Alone reference more than anything, and I don't know if I can attribute that to Alex, but that was great. That was great.

[00:39:57] TREY GERRALD: at it. Well, now that we have covered that one star

[00:39:59] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.

[00:40:01] TREY GERRALD: is your turn, Chelsey.

[00:40:03] CHELSEY DONN: hmm.

[00:40:04] TREY GERRALD: Let's flip the script!

[00:40:06] CHELSEY DONN: we know, Queens, I have the five star review and it's an interesting one. So if you want to hear it, you're going to have to hop on over to Patreon to listen.

[00:40:16] TREY GERRALD: Ooh. Okay, well, I can't wait to hear that. I'm ready for some more positive energy.

[00:40:20] CHELSEY DONN: ReviewThatReview. com slash Patreon

[00:40:24] TREY GERRALD: That's right. Alright, Queen, we did it. That was another flight around on the R U A R Q Ferris Wheel of Come on!

[00:40:34] CHELSEY DONN: cleared for landing. Trey, thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please tell a friend.

[00:40:41] TREY GERRALD: If you did not like what you heard, please tell an enemy. On this week's After Show, Chelsey and I are both taking a spin on the Meryl Go Round, as well as rating and reviewing that opposite end of the spectrum review.

[00:40:52] CHELSEY DONN: I can't imagine why this was said.

[00:40:57] TREY GERRALD: Have you ever done a rapid grapevine?

[00:41:00] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think I've done any dance move in a rapid way. Haha! Uh, Trey's doing a rapid grapevine. I did go to a Richard Simmons, Simmons class out here before he disappeared.

[00:41:19] TREY GERRALD: lots of grapevines, I bet.

[00:41:20] CHELSEY DONN: Lots of grapevines in Richard Simmons class.

[00:41:25] TREY GERRALD: Hmm, my imagination is bubbling over. Now remember,

[00:41:30] CHELSEY DONN: Ignore the haters, you're a queen!

[00:41:33] TREY GERRALD: gender nonspecific, Queen. Bye!

[00:41:38] VOICEOVER: Sign up directly on Apple Podcast to hear our weekly members only after show unlock additional benefits when you become a Patreon slash patreon. Follow us on all the socials at the review queens and join our mailing Arc vetch line is open 24 7 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.

[00:41:58] VOICEOVER: Don't be a ogana. Call the kvetch line today.

[00:42:03] TREY GERRALD: I'm sorry that we had to do all that.

[00:42:05] CHELSEY DONN: Why are you sorry?

[00:42:07] TREY GERRALD: We had a first ever. In the three years of recording, we completely did a review and decided to change it. So if you want to hear two one stars, this is your invitation to join the Patreon. It's only a dollar and then you'll understand why we decided to change

[00:42:24] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, well, that's even more incentive I guess to hop on over and if you are already a Patreon member then you know it, we'll see you on Friday Queens. Mwah!

[00:42:34] TREY GERRALD: Mwah. Bye!

[00:42:35] CHELSEY DONN: Bye!

Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.


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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 159: "Barking - 1 Star Review"

Review That Review with Chelsey & Trey Episode 159: "Barking - 1 Star Review" Transcription *Please pardon any and all spelling errors! [00:00:00] CHELSEY DONN: Goldie? Goldie! No barking, quiet, or y

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