Review That Review with Chelsey & Trey
Episode 183: "RE-VIEW: Blue Mountain Family Restaurant (from Ep 126)"
Transcription
*Please pardon any and all spelling errors!
[00:00:00] CHELSEY DONN: All right, guys, it is time for another review, Review That Review, but this time it is episode 126, which originally aired on November 1st, 2023. Trey was driving, I believe, with David and passed by this restaurant, Blue Mountain Family Restaurant, decided to look it up, and the rest is history. Needless to say, I don't think I've ever thought of a buffet in the same way after. Thank you for hearing this review. I really love this episode and I hope you do too. Please take a listen and if you would be so kind, leave us a five star review, share the podcast wherever you're listening to it right now. Just take a minute. Do it now. I'll wait. You're the best. All right, love you, enjoy the episode.
[00:00:49] THEME SONG: Everybody's got an opinion.
Every Californian and Virginian.
It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.
Someone's gotta settle the score.
Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!
Whose views win, which ones lose.
Online haters are comin' for you!
Baby, it's time to Review That Review!
[00:01:17] TREY GERRALD: hello, and welcome once again to Review That Review.
[00:01:24] TREY GERRALD: We are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing
[00:01:29] CHELSEY DONN: Pumpkin Spice! Review! I
[00:01:42] VOICEOVER: don't know what's wrong with me.
[00:01:45] CHELSEY DONN: That is Chelsey
[00:01:46] TREY GERRALD: Donn.
[00:01:47] CHELSEY DONN: And that is Trey Gerald.
[00:01:50] TREY GERRALD: And together, we are,
[00:01:52] CHELSEY DONN: Pumpkin
[00:01:52] VOICEOVER: Spice!
[00:01:54] CHELSEY DONN: The
[00:01:55] VOICEOVER: Review Queens. Buh bye!
[00:02:03] VOICEOVER: Everything is pumpkin spice. I
[00:02:04] TREY GERRALD: feel like we've been in pumpkin spice already.
[00:02:08] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, it's November 1st. The pumpkins are spicy.
[00:02:11] TREY GERRALD: They're getting spice, mama. They're getting
[00:02:13] CHELSEY DONN: spicy. I don't know if you've been to Trader Joe's lately, but it is pumpkin season at Trader Joe's.
[00:02:19] TREY GERRALD: Target.
[00:02:20] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, God, I love it.
[00:02:21] TREY GERRALD: Starbucks.
[00:02:22] CHELSEY DONN: Starbucks, my God, the inventor of the basic pumpkin spice latte.
[00:02:27] TREY GERRALD: Well, should we do it? Should we go ahead and jump into?
[00:02:30] CHELSEY DONN: Logic Complaint. Because you need to know what I want a logic complaint about on this pumpkin spice eve.
[00:02:35] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, I need to know.
[00:02:36] CHELSEY DONN: You need to know. In fact, there is. This is another real time complaint from me.
[00:02:41] CHELSEY DONN: So first of all, I would like to say David, if you're listening, I bought a new product that really made me think of you. And if I, I don't, I don't think that you have this version of this product, but if I book a big thing and I have a lot of money, I'm going to send you one. That's a promise. But anyway, so I bought this.
[00:03:00] CHELSEY DONN: Amazing Brita filter for Goldie, for her water for my room. You plug it in and you can like push a button and it like distributes the water.
[00:03:09] VOICEOVER: It's
[00:03:10] CHELSEY DONN: very nice. It's like, reminds me of the one that David has, but it's like the newer, more high tech version. Cause you know how David likes the water out of the fridge.
[00:03:19] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, in the fridge. So David has,
[00:03:23] TREY GERRALD: yeah, we've had a life update that I've been meaning to share and I keep forgetting, but we have like, you know, the, the things you put the chug, the, Bucket on top. And so we have one of those, but it's a reusable bucket.
[00:03:37] VOICEOVER: Okay. So
[00:03:37] TREY GERRALD: we just fill the bucket and then it filters it.
[00:03:39] TREY GERRALD: So, and it has room temperature and cold, which has really been fascinating.
[00:03:44] CHELSEY DONN: Well, that's a big life update, but anyway, so I bought this, this fabulous new Brita filter that has this automatic on off thing. And. I went to take it out of the box and it was really tightly wrapped in that styrofoam shell and that sound happened when the styrofoam rubs on the styrofoam and it's this squeaking sound and it's just, it's like a horror movie, it's like a horror movie for my ears, like people talk about the sounds of nail on the chalkboard, which is a terrible sound, but the sound of of styrofoam on styrofoam and that squeak, like, we gotta do better, guys, like, we know that styrofoam is really bad for the environment to start, so,
[00:04:37] VOICEOVER: is
[00:04:37] CHELSEY DONN: there not, and I'm happy that they took the extra care to make sure that my product was safe, I appreciate that, but that moment of taking it out of the box and dealing with it, my ears were like bleeding by the time I took this package apart, what is the deal?
[00:04:55] TREY GERRALD: I absolutely know the sound you're talking about, and I've never really considered it, but it is really unpleasant. It surely is. Yeah,
[00:05:03] CHELSEY DONN: it's like so cringy. It just makes my whole body shake
[00:05:06] TREY GERRALD: in the moment that it hits your ear. What happens to you? What is the sensation?
[00:05:12] CHELSEY DONN: Like, Oh, like, um, You know,
[00:05:17] VOICEOVER: ah,
[00:05:17] CHELSEY DONN: it's just like, it's, it's just like, it hurts.
[00:05:20] CHELSEY DONN: I can't explain it. It's just like, it's so, it's like underneath my skin and it just like, it gets to me. And it's just like, not the best intro. Thankfully, like the product is great and I really like it and it didn't ruin the whole relationship.
[00:05:36] TREY GERRALD: Can you imagine if you worked at a dumpster and you had to, like, deal with just, like, styrofoam sliding against it all day?
[00:05:43] TREY GERRALD: God
[00:05:44] CHELSEY DONN: bless the people that work in the factories that were, you know, that do any of these jobs where they're exposed to the styrofoam. I think if, if I was gonna say I think if God forbid that was my job, no offense to the person that does it because we all, you know, I would have to have like noise canceling headphones.
[00:06:01] TREY GERRALD: Oh, yeah,
[00:06:02] CHELSEY DONN: right. I couldn't do it with a bare ear.
[00:06:04] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, I get that. Maybe, maybe you need some now so that when you're opening packages, you're right, take it off the table. But I wonder if you would feel the tonal sensations as they vibrate. I might
[00:06:15] CHELSEY DONN: know. Exactly. I might know anyway, but I just, I really hate that sound.
[00:06:21] CHELSEY DONN: Does anyone else really hate that sound? I like, there's a few sounds. It really is like the nail on the chalkboard, that sound, I can't really think of many others, but like, those are the highly agreed. You know what it is for me? Like when I think about biting into a popsicle with my front two teeth,
[00:06:41] CHELSEY DONN: It's a shiver. It's a shiver through my whole body. Or if I think about, like, um, getting one of those Italian ices and taking that, like, that scoopy thing and just, you know, the, the, like, getting the, that does something to my body, I know another,
[00:06:59] TREY GERRALD: I know another thing that does,
[00:07:00] CHELSEY DONN: when
[00:07:02] TREY GERRALD: you give yourself a paper cut,
[00:07:04] CHELSEY DONN: Ooh, that's
[00:07:05] TREY GERRALD: bad.
[00:07:06] TREY GERRALD: It's like you can instantly feel it somehow.
[00:07:08] CHELSEY DONN: I think, yeah, I was at work the other day and I gave myself a paper cut and I was just like, Damn it! You know, I just like had some big reaction. My boss was like, What happened?
[00:07:18] TREY GERRALD: Wait, what else is like that? I feel like I can instantly recall the smell of gasoline too.
[00:07:23] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, I can recall the smell of gasoline. Yeah, you can recall the sensation of getting a paper cut, for sure.
[00:07:29] TREY GERRALD: Oh, I'm so sorry, Chelsey, but I hope that Goldie is appreciative.
[00:07:34] CHELSEY DONN: I think she is. I think it's going really well. And I know that her water is clean, and that makes me happy. And yeah, so in the end, it's a win.
[00:07:43] CHELSEY DONN: And I'm very happy to know that that Trey and David have figured out their water tobaccos, because so now you're just a one water
[00:07:54] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, it's really great. I'll, I'll induct it in the future.
[00:07:57] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, great.
[00:07:58] TREY GERRALD: We'll do a little, um, a little pin in this.
[00:08:01] CHELSEY DONN: I love
[00:08:01] TREY GERRALD: that.
[00:08:02] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Well, now that I've complained and hopefully not made all of your ears bleed, should we go ahead and jump into an online review?
[00:08:13] TREY GERRALD: I think it's time. I think, I think we've reached the moment and I think you're all going to be better for it. Let's go ahead.
[00:08:21] CHELSEY DONN: Review That Review. As you know, we are your trusty review queens. We bring in reviews from the internet. What? Did you
[00:08:31] VOICEOVER: say pumpkin
[00:08:32] TREY GERRALD: spice? I did. I was like, you
[00:08:35] CHELSEY DONN: didn't laugh.
[00:08:36] TREY GERRALD: Well, I didn't hear it, but then I just was remembering how you said it.
[00:08:39] TREY GERRALD: And then I was like, wait, I think she just mouthed that as the sound she started. I did. Oh my God. Oh
[00:08:45] CHELSEY DONN: my God. As you know, we are your trusty Pumpkin Spice Review Queens. We bring in reviews from the internet that we feel need to be inspected.
[00:08:55] TREY GERRALD: We read you the review, break it down and rate the impact On a scale
[00:08:59] VOICEOVER: from 0
[00:09:00] TREY GERRALD: to 5 crowns, It's a very regal process that we call, Assess That
[00:09:06] CHELSEY DONN: Kevich, That's right, Trey, it is your turn this week, what have you brought in for us?
[00:09:14] TREY GERRALD: Today I have a really fun review. This is a one star Yelp review for a restaurant that is called Blue Mountain Family Restaurant.
[00:09:27] CHELSEY DONN: Blue Mountain. In what, in what location?
[00:09:30] TREY GERRALD: So this is in a place called Chardlesville? Pennsylvania. Yeah.
[00:09:40] VOICEOVER: Char Charville. That's terrible. No,
[00:09:43] TREY GERRALD: ALS. Als like I sharded my pants. S-H-A-R-T? Yes. L-E-S-V-I-L-L-E. Charleville.
[00:09:54] CHELSEY DONN: That is a bad name for a town. They should rename it. They should rename it. We should petition. Chartersville? Does everyone
[00:10:01] TREY GERRALD: just No, Charteaux. Charteaux. Charteaux. You keep saying it
[00:10:05] VOICEOVER: wrong.
[00:10:06] VOICEOVER: Charteaux. Pumpkin Spice.
[00:10:12] VOICEOVER: Charteaux. Charteaux. Either way.
[00:10:15] CHELSEY DONN: Are there just sharding turtles everywhere?
[00:10:20] VOICEOVER: There's just sharding turtles
[00:10:21] CHELSEY DONN: that are just going across every, every highway. They're like, make sure to pause for the sharding turtles.
[00:10:29] TREY GERRALD: Okay. So David and I were coming back from Atlantic City and we were hungry. So we were like trying to figure out like where would be the nice place to eat.
[00:10:42] TREY GERRALD: So David was like looking through Yelp reviews and he found this review.
[00:10:46] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. I'm so excited. This is all about David. Look at my complaint was about David.
[00:10:52] TREY GERRALD: It's a very David
[00:10:52] CHELSEY DONN: episode.
[00:10:53] TREY GERRALD: So this is written by Lindsey A.
[00:10:56] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, like my sister. Is it A Y or E Y?
[00:10:59] TREY GERRALD: It's E Y. And this was written nine months ago.
[00:11:03] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.
[00:11:03] TREY GERRALD: And here we are. This is the review. The restaurant. One word. The restaurant itself looks clean and inviting, all caps. Beyond that, the food was absolute trash. It's one of the worst places I have ever eaten. I order young turkey and stuffing with gravy.
[00:11:35] TREY GERRALD: I got the salad bar and a side of mixed veggies. Where do I even begin? The salad bar was lackluster and super limited with weird sides and nothing made sense. I wish I had taken a picture of the only quote unquote soup on the salad bar which looked more like melted glue with onions in it.
[00:12:46] TREY GERRALD: I tasted it just to figure out what in the world it was. And I still don't know.
[00:12:59] TREY GERRALD: One bite and I was repulsed. I got a standard salad, no oil and vinegar on the bar.
[00:13:12] TREY GERRALD: The meal itself was so bad. That I couldn't even eat half of it.
[00:13:17] VOICEOVER: It
[00:13:26] TREY GERRALD: tasted sour and was expensive, was what you got.
[00:13:37] VOICEOVER: God,
[00:13:38] TREY GERRALD: I ordered a side of mixed veggies,
[00:13:41] VOICEOVER: Oh no,
[00:13:42] TREY GERRALD: and they tasted like actual fish,
[00:13:47] VOICEOVER: That is my nightmare,
[00:13:50] TREY GERRALD: I took one bite and couldn't continue,
[00:13:52] VOICEOVER: As
[00:13:55] TREY GERRALD: the owner of a food business myself, I know what food is supposed to taste like, And this was repulsive, To add to it, as soon as we left, I became extremely nauseous and almost threw up for the next several hours.
[00:14:18] TREY GERRALD: Thankfully, I did not. However, the very next day, I had water diarrhea
[00:14:27] CHELSEY DONN: all day long, Not
[00:14:30] TREY GERRALD: something that happens to me ever, Do. Not. Eat. Here. Oh my god,
[00:14:42] CHELSEY DONN: I forgot that I almost, I almost complained about stomach flu, which would have been even more of
[00:14:47] TREY GERRALD: a thing,
[00:14:48] CHELSEY DONN: But, oh my god, okay, here's the thing, I have a real theory, and my theory is, That the sense of smell in the nose, This was invented to prevent having to ingest
[00:15:02] VOICEOVER: things
[00:15:03] CHELSEY DONN: that look suspicious.
[00:15:05] CHELSEY DONN: The fact that Lindsay saw this soup, said it looked like glue with goopy onions in it,
[00:15:13] VOICEOVER: and then
[00:15:14] CHELSEY DONN: decided to eat it,
[00:15:17] VOICEOVER: I can understand
[00:15:18] CHELSEY DONN: smelling it, maybe, just to be like, what is this, I'm curious, but eating it? I mean, I'm very, I just got over a stomach bug, so I'm very, like, my stomach is still, like, I'm on high alert, so if I saw anything, like, if my veggies smelled of fish, I wouldn't eat it,
[00:15:39] TREY GERRALD: No,
[00:15:40] CHELSEY DONN: They talk about the food tasting sour, but they ate almost half
[00:15:44] TREY GERRALD: of it, Half of it, What the hell, Get the
[00:15:45] CHELSEY DONN: hell out of here, I mean, sour, what do you think that means?
[00:15:51] CHELSEY DONN: Bad, like rotten.
[00:15:53] TREY GERRALD: Young turkey and stuffing and gravy. First of all, that's
[00:15:55] CHELSEY DONN: young turkey, what does that even mean? What does that mean? I don't know. Is that like the veal of turkey, like it's like a baby?
[00:16:03] TREY GERRALD: I guess, but don't you want turkey to be big? I don't know. And old? Maybe you don't want it to be old.
[00:16:09] TREY GERRALD: Maybe
[00:16:09] CHELSEY DONN: not old, I don't know. I just think, I don't know. This is very strange. I guess things like started to kind of make sense for me for Lindsay when they said that they're an owner of a food business and they know what food like I kind of at that point, I was like, I can understand being like, you know, just like winning that like,
[00:16:27] TREY GERRALD: like on Chopped.
[00:16:28] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, exactly how it's like the Chopped judges have to at least like taste
[00:16:33] TREY GERRALD: a bite of
[00:16:33] CHELSEY DONN: whatever this concoction is, even if they think that like, maybe it's It's gross, but like,
[00:16:39] TREY GERRALD: but this is not chopped. This is not chopped. You're
[00:16:42] CHELSEY DONN: just at this restaurant. There's absolutely zero reason to like pass go. Also, what I'm curious about, they didn't go to this restaurant alone, right?
[00:16:52] CHELSEY DONN: At the top, they told us that they were stopping through town or am I mixing that up? Do they? It doesn't
[00:16:58] TREY GERRALD: say.
[00:16:58] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, so we don't know if they were alone or not.
[00:17:01] TREY GERRALD: They don't give us any background of who they're with.
[00:17:03] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.
[00:17:04] TREY GERRALD: As soon as we left.
[00:17:05] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, we left. There you go. So I'm immediately wondering, like, like, did you just order badly?
[00:17:11] CHELSEY DONN: Like, is this like, not the kind of place where you want to get a turkey dinner? Like, do you want to just get a burger? Or do you want to just get like, something very plain? Okay, so how do you imagine this whole salad bar side turkey dinner scenario was set out on the menu? Because you've been a server before?
[00:17:28] TREY GERRALD: Well, I just imagined that they ordered the Yeah. Turkey and stuffing. Yeah. It comes with two sides. One side is the veggies. And then they decided to also get the salad bar. So that's either like one of the sides or that is like you start, you're doing a starter, which is the salad bar,
[00:17:44] CHELSEY DONN: right? That's what I would think.
[00:17:46] CHELSEY DONN: I would think that the turkey dinner comes with the salad bar or you pay
[00:17:51] TREY GERRALD: a couple of extra dollars.
[00:17:53] CHELSEY DONN: So I was thinking a little bit of both. Yeah. Like, initially, because they weren't saying, other than the soup, they weren't saying that the salad looked gross. They said that there was no vinegar and oil, which I feel like maybe you could have asked your server for salad dressing.
[00:18:04] CHELSEY DONN: But I feel like when it's a free kind of add on salad bar, I'm not expecting it to be that avant garde. I'm not expecting there to be soup. I would think that it's just like, Literally a salad bar.
[00:18:18] TREY GERRALD: I had that thought too about like, oh, they have soup on the salad bar. Right. Like,
[00:18:22] CHELSEY DONN: like, I feel like any complaint of like, it was like pretty sparse.
[00:18:26] CHELSEY DONN: It's like, well, what are you expecting? This isn't like the Sizzler or like wherever, I don't know, this isn't like a restaurant where they're like the whole Megillah is the salad bar. I, I don't think, like, I think that this is just like, there's a deli. Would near where I grew up and they have a pickle bar, right?
[00:18:43] CHELSEY DONN: And that's like included when you like, order your sandwich, you can visit the pickle bar and it has pickles and it has other pickled vegetables and some sauerkraut and some health salad. And I think it's lovely. Like, is there soup and like romaine at this bar? No, there's not, but I'm not expecting it because it's not like I'm going to a buffet.
[00:19:05] CHELSEY DONN: I'm just visiting the pickle bar. I think about the salad bar in a
[00:19:10] TREY GERRALD: But if I think about Ruby Tuesday, which used to be famous for having a salad bar, I think they did have soups as well. But I, but I get your point too. Cause also in full disclosure, this restaurant, Chelsey, I sent you some of the pictures like on Yelp.
[00:19:24] TREY GERRALD: Like this is a place where like the placemat has like, The branding of the restaurant, like it feels like a mom and pop. The menu is like laminated.
[00:19:34] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, it looks like a diner.
[00:19:35] TREY GERRALD: It looks like a diner. And if you zoom in on this food, like the breakfast looks fine, but like, I don't know what
[00:19:42] CHELSEY DONN: the turkey dinner looks awful.
[00:19:44] CHELSEY DONN: It looks like.
[00:19:45] TREY GERRALD: The turkey dinner
[00:19:46] CHELSEY DONN: sliced thick turkey that looks like it could have come from like a frozen.
[00:19:51] TREY GERRALD: Honestly, it looks like very 80s 90s. There's like a picture of like the circular carousel of pies, which is charming. But then like, there is a photo if you look of the salad bar, there's a bunch of saran wrap on things and like, it just like I would not trust the salad bar here.
[00:20:09] CHELSEY DONN: There's like a random like, Love of bread, but it's like, it's like a wonder.
[00:20:15] VOICEOVER: Yes.
[00:20:16] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. I mean, like, I definitely, okay. Now that I'm looking at the menu and I'm looking at every, I would never order the turkey dinner from this place. Call me crazy.
[00:20:26] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, me either. I would get like a sandwich.
[00:20:29] CHELSEY DONN: I would get a burger.
[00:20:30] CHELSEY DONN: I would get a sandwich. I would get it. Definitely fries, eggs, breakfast food,
[00:20:34] TREY GERRALD: breakfast, for sure, anything I feel like in the breakfast
[00:20:37] CHELSEY DONN: realm, I feel like would be okay, like, they have like a picture of a banana split on the menu, like, come here for ice cream, I think you're safe, for
[00:20:47] TREY GERRALD: sure,
[00:20:48] CHELSEY DONN: I just think, why are we, why is Lindsay expecting, it's like she's expecting fine dining,
[00:20:56] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, that, well, all, two points here, because I think your point about was Lindsay the only person in their party that was sick, because that seems like important information that's not included, and also your point that, like, this is not La Bernardine, this is, like, literally like a little family restaurant on the side of the road.
[00:21:16] TREY GERRALD: So, okay, what about this water diarrhea? This is something Lindsey never, never gets. This never happens to Lindsey.
[00:21:24] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I think Lindsey is one of those people that is just like, I got a stomach of steel, goopy of soup, let me try it, you know? It's like, what the hell? Like, sour meat. Give it here, you know, well, like, I don't know what, like, I would assume that if I ate sour meat and goopy soup, that I would have diarrhea, right?
[00:21:51] VOICEOVER: Yeah.
[00:21:51] CHELSEY DONN: Now, do I want to eat at this restaurant after reading this review? No,
[00:21:57] TREY GERRALD: no,
[00:21:59] CHELSEY DONN: I'm guessing you and David didn't stop here.
[00:22:04] TREY GERRALD: Oh
[00:22:04] CHELSEY DONN: no!
[00:22:06] TREY GERRALD: No, we didn't. No, we chose
[00:22:08] CHELSEY DONN: not to. We went to a Mediterranean place. Okay. Yeah, so I think that there's an impact here. I don't think I'm going to stop at this restaurant. I don't think I'm going to eat here, but I don't know that, like, I trust Lindsay.
[00:22:21] CHELSEY DONN: I find Lindsay hilarious. Like, I just find anyone hilarious that's going to describe, like, a food that is disgusting and then be like, I tried it. I ate it.
[00:22:30] TREY GERRALD: What? Are you crazy? Also, this whole comment about the oil and vinegar, I'm wondering if that's kind of like a health dig? And looking at the photo of that salad bar, nowhere in my mind do I think there would be oil and vinegar on the salad bar.
[00:22:48] TREY GERRALD: That's gonna be a request,
[00:22:49] CHELSEY DONN: Ranch Dressing,
[00:22:51] TREY GERRALD: It's gonna be Ranch Thousand Island, It's gonna be Italian, It's gonna be like, Disgusting, Like, It's just not, People aren't gonna be getting, I mean the containers,
[00:22:59] CHELSEY DONN: Like, Listen, I would not get the salad bar, I just think this is a classic example of Lindsay made Absolutely the wrong choice,
[00:23:10] TREY GERRALD: Correct.
[00:23:11] CHELSEY DONN: In everything that they ordered.
[00:23:13] TREY GERRALD: Right. It's like when you and I separately went to Nobu and we did not eat fish.
[00:23:18] CHELSEY DONN: Right. But that's just us. But you don't go to this family restaurant. The steak was delicious because it was Nobu.
[00:23:25] TREY GERRALD: Right. But I don't think Lindsay's getting the right. I don't think Lindsay's ordering the right
[00:23:30] CHELSEY DONN: thing.
[00:23:30] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think you get a, this turkey meal. I like, I would imagine it was frozen in the back, right? Like, I just don't think that this is going to be, I'm freshly carving a turkey back here. And I think if you work in a restaurant and you work in the food biz, then your discretion should be a little bit better.
[00:23:49] CHELSEY DONN: Like I'm looking at these pictures and I'm knowing I'm probably going to get breakfast. Honestly, I might not even risk the burger.
[00:23:54] TREY GERRALD: Correct. Just give me an omelette.
[00:23:56] CHELSEY DONN: Just give me an omelette. Yeah,
[00:23:57] TREY GERRALD: but now that I'm looking closer at the actual review, the only thing that wasn't bad actually was the salad, which is interesting because they're saying the meal was so bad they could only eat half of it.
[00:24:08] TREY GERRALD: The soup was like disgusting, and the only complaint about the standard salad was that there was no oil and vinegar on the bar,
[00:24:15] CHELSEY DONN: right? So maybe they could have gotten from their server.
[00:24:18] TREY GERRALD: Why do you think that the mixed veggies tasted like actual fish? Let
[00:24:22] CHELSEY DONN: Because maybe nobody effing orders the, like, turkey dinner, so they, like, took them off of the, like, fish, you know, like, yeah, I don't know.
[00:24:30] CHELSEY DONN: What do
[00:24:30] TREY GERRALD: you think? Like the carrots?
[00:24:32] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah.
[00:24:32] TREY GERRALD: What do you think the mixed veggies were? Carrots, broccoli, cauliflower?
[00:24:37] CHELSEY DONN: I think carrots,
[00:24:38] TREY GERRALD: peas,
[00:24:38] CHELSEY DONN: string beans, peas.
[00:24:40] TREY GERRALD: Oh my god, do you remember peas? I love peas.
[00:24:43] CHELSEY DONN: I don't mind peas.
[00:24:43] TREY GERRALD: I love early peas, the little teeny baby ones. Yeah,
[00:24:48] CHELSEY DONN: English peas. So early. Such baby little peas.
[00:24:52] TREY GERRALD: All right.
[00:24:53] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, my God. I do feel like nauseous. I'll give her that.
[00:24:56] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, it does. It does definitely have an impact. Valuable, unique information here. I mean, they got very sick from eating here, and that has an impact on me. Separate of Lindsay's, like, personality
[00:25:08] CHELSEY DONN: choices,
[00:25:09] TREY GERRALD: right? I mean, it's interesting that they felt the need to, like, consume a lot of the stuff when the warning comes.
[00:25:16] TREY GERRALD: Trolling with
[00:25:16] CHELSEY DONN: soup was just
[00:25:17] TREY GERRALD: like It's so insane. There was a couple of spelling errors.
[00:25:21] CHELSEY DONN: Definitely some spelling errors, I heard.
[00:25:23] TREY GERRALD: Humor was off the chart. We were really clawing.
[00:25:26] CHELSEY DONN: It was rolling, but not necessarily, like, The intended outcome, I don't think, from Lindsay. I think Lindsay takes themselves very seriously, but that being said, the review was humorous.
[00:25:38] TREY GERRALD: But then this whole thing we kept going on about is like Lindsay ordered the wrong item. Is that going to be a fluke? Like, do we think that that Lindsay just was fluky? Like, do we think that everything is going to make you sick? I mean, I don't
[00:25:50] CHELSEY DONN: know how many people are going to this restaurant and ordering the turkey dinner, the turkey, you know, dinner.
[00:25:55] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think it's a fluke. I think that there's probably a lot of disappointed diners.
[00:26:00] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, no, and maybe the quality.
[00:26:03] CHELSEY DONN: What was the overall? Do we know?
[00:26:07] TREY GERRALD: 3. 4 out of 72 reviews. It's unclaimed.
[00:26:11] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, so like that, and that seems about right. You know, like, I don't think you're going to go and have a five star experience at this, what I consider to be diner.
[00:26:21] TREY GERRALD: Oh my god, I just realized, it's Shardlesville, and Lindsey ended up sharding.
[00:26:26] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my god, you're right!
[00:26:28] TREY GERRALD: Water diarrhea. Of course
[00:26:29] CHELSEY DONN: she sharded from Shardersville! Shardles! Shardles!
[00:26:33] TREY GERRALD: Alright, I can crown Lindsey. I mean,
[00:26:35] CHELSEY DONN: that's hilarious. I can crown
[00:26:36] TREY GERRALD: Lindsey. Okay, so Chelsey and I each have our own set of 0 5 crown cards.
[00:26:39] TREY GERRALD: In an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another, we will simultaneously reveal our ratings.
[00:26:45] VOICEOVER: The queens are tabulating.
[00:26:54] CHELSEY DONN: Wow, fascinating, I'm holding up two and a half crowns, Trey is holding up four and a half crowns, nearly a Review Queen, super curious to hear about that, I went with two and a half for the laughs, like I laughed, that was a good, Lindsay, you got me, you got me with the laughs. You got me. You got me. That's where the two and a half crowns comes from.
[00:27:15] CHELSEY DONN: Clearly you got a stomach of steel or you thought you did. I just, I don't know that I trust Lindsay as a reliable narrator. I don't know that most people would be like, that looks disgusting. Let me try it. I just don't know. That that's gonna be the most common experience and I don't know that everybody's gonna order this.
[00:27:38] CHELSEY DONN: I think maybe more people would be like you and I, Trey, and and kind of go breakfast, go, go really basic and I think those are the people that are writing the four star reviews. So for that reason I decided to go with two and a half crowns, middle of the road, most of the heavy lifting coming from the fact that I just got a real good chuckle.
[00:27:58] CHELSEY DONN: But you almost went full Review Queen. Super curious to hear why. Why did you go with four and a half crowns for Lindsey, who shardled in Charters Shardleds?
[00:28:09] TREY GERRALD: Do you think the Blue Mountain Family Restaurant serves pumpkin spice? Probably.
[00:28:17] CHELSEY DONN: They probably have it like way in the back and Lindsey's like, I'll take the pumpkin spice pancakes on the side, you know?
[00:28:24] TREY GERRALD: So I said four and a half ultimately because the impact is like, I don't want to shart.
[00:28:30] CHELSEY DONN: No, thank you.
[00:28:30] TREY GERRALD: I don't want water diarrhea.
[00:28:32] CHELSEY DONN: Ehh, no, I do certainly do not have just gotten out of that.
[00:28:36] TREY GERRALD: And I do feel like, I understand the allure of like this Thanksgiving dinner.
[00:28:42] CHELSEY DONN: Right.
[00:28:43] TREY GERRALD: And I think that this is like the warning, you know, like, consider where, like, consider where you're at.
[00:28:49] TREY GERRALD: What is being prepared in that kitchen and like, is this the place you want roasted turkey from? Like, maybe not. Um, no,
[00:28:56] CHELSEY DONN: absolutely not.
[00:28:57] TREY GERRALD: And honestly, like Lindsay doesn't include a photo, but the actual photos on Yelp really were the deal breaker. And I am the person that loves nasty, trashy. I want fast food.
[00:29:10] TREY GERRALD: I want diners. And this, the vibe, even
[00:29:13] CHELSEY DONN: for you,
[00:29:14] TREY GERRALD: it feels like it hasn't been renovated and since the 70s and that feels unnerving to me.
[00:29:19] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,
[00:29:20] TREY GERRALD: but I think that Lindsay, I think Lindsay is a little shady, but they were water diarrhea and I think they have the right. So I said four and a half because we decided to drive on.
[00:29:31] TREY GERRALD: So it did have an impact in real time. That's
[00:29:33] CHELSEY DONN: right. That's true. That is true. Oh, my goodness. I so enjoyed that. Thank you, David, for finding that review for us. I really, really did enjoy that a lot. And Lindsey, I hope that you think twice, man, before just putting that spoon in your mouth. We were given a nose for a wonderful reason.
[00:29:55] CHELSEY DONN: A sniff, sniff is not going to leave you with diarrhea.
[00:29:58] TREY GERRALD: Oof. Yikes. Well. All right.
[00:30:02] CHELSEY DONN: That was fun.
[00:30:03] TREY GERRALD: Speaking of reveling. Yes. Chelsey, we've done it. We have reached the most regal portion of today's show.
[00:30:10] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.
[00:30:11] TREY GERRALD: Who are you inducting today? Foie?
[00:30:14] CHELSEY DONN: My Royal Highness. Thank you for asking, Trey. So for today's Royal Highness, I decided to dig into my Good Samaritan files and find a sweet story to share with you all today.
[00:30:26] CHELSEY DONN: So just a couple weeks ago in real time, a pilot flew an American Girl doll 5, 880 miles to return it to a nine year old girl who lost it. You guys, how's that? How sweet is that? American Airlines pilot James Dannen first learned about Valentina Dominguez's lost doll through her parents Facebook post.
[00:30:53] CHELSEY DONN: Rudy and Celeste Dominguez had last seen the doll on their plane to Tokyo, where the family had a stopover while traveling back to their home in Plano, Texas, after a trip to Bali. Danon, who's based out of the Dallas Fort Worth area, contacted Turkish Airlines, Lost and Found, at Tokyo's Haneda Airport, and located the missing toy, he then traveled with the doll, named Beatrice, and even took photos of her throughout their journey, which he sent to Valentina.
[00:31:30] CHELSEY DONN: Danon said that it's his nature. He likes helping people and that's just that's just what he likes to do. That's his jam. He really is so glad that he could do something nice for someone. And this nine year old girl is just beyond thrilled to have Been reunited with her doll. They even show a photo of Dannon handing the doll over to a very, very happy nine year old.
[00:31:55] CHELSEY DONN: So, wow. I mean, she asked him when he gave her the doll, was she well behaved on the flight? And he said, yes, very well behaved. Um, he also gifted her some Japanese treats and a map that tracked all the places where Beatrice had been. How cute is that? You guys? So sweet. I mean, I just love stories like this.
[00:32:17] CHELSEY DONN: I just think it's so nice. I think there's something so cool about the fact that this wasn't even the pilot of the plane where it was lost, but that this pilot saw that this had happened and went the extra mile and tracked it down. I mean, just such a cool story. Also, These kind of things just really warm my heart and remind me that there are good people.
[00:32:37] CHELSEY DONN: And I just also remember being a kid and that feeling of losing something on vacation is just so heartbreaking. So I just wanted to say a very special thank you to our pilot James Dannen of Fort Worth for just being such a queen and making this girl's day by doing something so sweet. So thank you, American Airlines, Captain James Dannen.
[00:33:02] CHELSEY DONN: You are my Royal Highness.
[00:33:05] TREY GERRALD: That's amazing, especially because the parents could have literally just bought another doll, a girl doll.
[00:33:11] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, but you know what? I feel like you couldn't because it's like you, even as a kid, like I was obsessed with this stuffed dog named Muttsy that I guess other people had.
[00:33:22] CHELSEY DONN: But like, I always thought Muttsy was like my dog. And if I left Muttsy somewhere, even if my parents could have replaced him, it wouldn't really be the same. I would always know that it wasn't mine.
[00:33:32] TREY GERRALD: Of course. Yeah.
[00:33:33] CHELSEY DONN: You know? So I just thought, what a sweet story.
[00:33:37] TREY GERRALD: And how nice that Beatrice was like on such a huge journey.
[00:33:42] TREY GERRALD: And now Valentina gets to track like all of Beatrice's happenings. That's so cute. I know. Great job. Pilot, Captain, Danon,
[00:33:52] CHELSEY DONN: Captain Danon,
[00:33:53] TREY GERRALD: By Danon,
[00:33:55] CHELSEY DONN: By
[00:33:56] TREY GERRALD: Danon, Oh my God, love it, Well we did a queen, That's
[00:34:00] CHELSEY DONN: so fun, Trey, what a good episode,
[00:34:02] TREY GERRALD: That was really fun, I'm appreciative for not having water diarrhea, I'm
[00:34:06] CHELSEY DONN: so glad that you guys didn't stop and eat there, I was, When I asked you that and you sort of hesitated, I was like, Oh no, I know,
[00:34:13] TREY GERRALD: No, No, I have to save room for Pumpkin Spice, because that's another round on the R U A R Q.
[00:34:20] TREY GERRALD: Ferris wheel of soup that looks like melted glue with onions in it.
[00:34:26] CHELSEY DONN: Better taste it. Thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please tell a friend.
[00:34:31] TREY GERRALD: If you did not like what you heard, please tell an enemy.
[00:34:34] CHELSEY DONN: On today's after show pod, Trey, get ready, we are rating and reviewing a 5 star review from Amazon for WallMonkeyz Senior Woman with Asthma Wall Decal, Peel and Stick Graphic, 24 inches height by 21 inches width.
[00:35:01] VOICEOVER: It's a wrap! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious,
[00:35:05] TREY GERRALD: woman asthma. I know the man, or maybe it is a woman. It's an old lady
[00:35:15] CHELSEY DONN: literally holding her inhaler. Yes.
[00:35:19] TREY GERRALD: Well, I just, I really can't even begin to ponder. Why this was said. I mean, this is just, this is too much. It's too much. It's
[00:35:29] CHELSEY DONN: too much. Me too. I wonder what made us say that.
[00:35:35] TREY GERRALD: Well, as we question, why don't we just all remember?
[00:35:40] CHELSEY DONN: Ignore the haters, you're a Pumpkin Spice Queen,
[00:35:44] TREY GERRALD: gender nonspecific Pumpkin Spice Queen, that's right.
[00:35:49] CHELSEY DONN: Thank you so much for listening to that review. We hope you enjoyed it. And as we've mentioned at the top of the show, it really helps us if you could please share the podcast, leave a review, get us up in the algorithms, do all the magic and help us out so that when we come back after this we can come back bigger and better than ever, Baby.
[00:36:09] CHELSEY DONN: We love you. Ah. Sign up directly on Apple Podcast to hear our weekly members only after show. Unlock additional benefits when you become a Patreon member@reviewthatreview.com slash patreon. Follow us on all the socials at the review queens and join our mailing list@reviewthatreview.com. Arc vetch line is open 24 7 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.
[00:36:31] CHELSEY DONN: Don't be aana. Call the kvetch line today.
Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.
Photo by Girl with red hat on Unsplash
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