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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 21: "HALLOWEEN SPECIAL - Inflatable Dino Costume / Abracadabra NYC"



Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 21: "HALLOWEEN SPECIAL - Inflatable Dino Costume / Abracadabra NYC"

Transcription

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Ooo, hello.

[00:00:33] Chelsey Donn: Hi. It's so spooky being in the dark.

[00:00:36] Trey Gerrald: So Scary. Hello everyone, welcome to Review that Review, the podcast dedicated to reviewing-

[00:00:43] Chelsey Donn: Reviews. We're just like Siskel and Ebert, only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing and let's be honest, sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:55] Trey Gerrald: That's Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:56] Chelsey Donn: And that's Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:57] Trey Gerrald: And together, we are

[00:00:59] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens.

[00:01:04] Halloween Costume REVEALS!

[00:01:04] Trey Gerrald: Happy Halloween Review Queens. Chelsey and I are currently on our recording apparatus, which is called Zoom and we have our videos turned off because we're surprising each other with Halloween costumes because it is-

[00:01:18] Chelsey Donn: Halloween.

[00:01:19] Trey Gerrald: Woo, all right, so we're gonna turn our screens on, you ready?

[00:01:23] Chelsey Donn: Okay, I'm ready.

[00:01:25] Trey Gerrald: Three, two, one, go.

[00:01:30] Chelsey Donn: Ah.

[00:01:36] Trey Gerrald: Ah.

[00:01:36] Chelsey Donn: [laughs]

[00:01:36] Trey Gerrald: Happy Halloween.

[00:01:41] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God, happy Halloween. Trey, you're beautiful.

[00:01:42] Trey Gerrald: I can't see you, where are you? Chelsey is dressed as Where's Waldo and I can't see her.

[00:01:46] Chelsey Donn: I know, I know, you're gonna have to keep looking, keep looking. Here I am, here I am, look. Okay, what I'm looking at is Trey dressed as Drew Barrymore from Scream but like way prettier.

[00:01:59] Trey Gerrald: I have my Jiffy Pop.

[00:02:01] Chelsey Donn: She has Jiffy Pop, she's on the phone, she's calling, like, he's in the house.

[00:02:05] Trey Gerrald: Is he behind me?

[00:02:06] Chelsey Donn: There he is. Ah.

[00:02:07] Trey Gerrald: Ah. Do you see, I hung the mask. Do you see him?

[00:02:10] Chelsey Donn: Okay, first of all, let's talk about Trey for just one second 'cause like I, I can't even handle the beauty of what I'm saying right now. You guys-

[00:02:17] Trey Gerrald: Mm.

[00:02:18] Chelsey Donn: She's so beautiful.

[00:02:20] Trey Gerrald: [laughs]

[00:02:20] Chelsey Donn: She has a pink glow behind here. There's like some sort of an LED light show happening behind Drew.

[00:02:29] Trey Gerrald: Well that's what I always have, but tonight it's red instead of white.

[00:02:33] Chelsey Donn: Right, but it's this like hot pink, sexy hot pink that just goes with the look so well and she just looks absolutely stunning, you guys. I'm like intimidated by your beauty. I'm not even gonna lie.

[00:02:47] Trey Gerrald: Well I also have touch up your appearance on.

[00:02:49] Chelsey Donn: I mean, you guys, this is worth the Patreon alone, just so you can see what gorgeousness I'm looking at right now. Like, is that a full lash?

[00:02:59] Trey Gerrald: It is.

[00:02:59] Chelsey Donn: I'm getting like flashbacks to that, when we did that lash review. Like-

[00:03:03] Trey Gerrald: I have full lashes and I even have two little teeny babies on the bottom.

[00:03:08] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god, I love her.

[00:03:11] Trey Gerrald: I started getting ready for this recording four hours ago!

[00:03:14] Chelsey Donn: I was gonna say, you must have, I started getting ready for this Waldo look like 15 minutes ago. Oh my God, Trey.

[00:03:23] Trey Gerrald: You look great. So did you find the beanie?

[00:03:25] Chelsey Donn: I found the beanie.

[00:03:27] Trey Gerrald: Perfect.

[00:03:28] Chelsey Donn: She's, she's bobby pinned and there's a lot to negotiate 'cause we got a beanie, we got the glasses and we got the headset. You, you went head... oh no, you got a fancy headset, oh, I like that.

[00:03:36] Trey Gerrald: Well, I put in these like old timey Apple-

[00:03:39] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:03:39] Trey Gerrald: Headsets because this wig is too short, that I did attempt-

[00:03:44] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:03:44] Trey Gerrald: To, um, put the headset on, but it sort of messed up the illusion, you know? It's all about illusion.

[00:03:50] Chelsey Donn: I feel like I, I don't even know if I can refer to you as Trey in this episode. Am I calling you Drew? Like, I just, I feel like I have a new cohost.

[00:03:59] Trey Gerrald: Do you know what her name is in the movie?

[00:04:00] Chelsey Donn: I don't, I'm like really afraid of all scary movies, so I just... I know the scene, but I-

[00:04:06] Trey Gerrald: Have you ever... have you never seen Scream?

[00:04:08] Chelsey Donn: I've seen it, but I, I think I like closed my eyes through some of it and like-

[00:04:13] Trey Gerrald: Oh yeah.

[00:04:13] Chelsey Donn: Probably was distracted and not really paying attention 'cause I'm so afraid of scary movies. Like I'm not a horror movie girl. I know the mask... what's her name? Sorry.

[00:04:23] Trey Gerrald: Her name is-

[00:04:24] Chelsey Donn: Weathers!

[00:04:24] Trey Gerrald: Ca- Casey Becker. No, Gale Weathers, that's Courtney Cox's character.

[00:04:28] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] Oh, Casey.

[00:04:31] Trey Gerrald: 'Casey? Baby?' That's what the mom says when she sees her strung up in a tree, spoiler al- alert.

[00:04:36] Chelsey Donn: Oh. It's okay, if y'all haven't see it by now. And there's a knife, you guys, a bloody knife.

[00:04:42] Trey Gerrald: The blood.

[00:04:42] Chelsey Donn: Oh no sorry, but the blood is-

[00:04:44] Trey Gerrald: Rhinestones.

[00:04:45] Chelsey Donn: Did you bejewel that yourself?

[00:04:47] Trey Gerrald: I did. You know this but I, I wanted to do... I wanted to do the women of Scream, me and my husband and my dogs, family, we do an annual Halloween photo and my husband didn't think that Scream's characters were iconic enough, so then I was like, uh, well, it's iconic enough to me so I'm going... he didn't think they'd be recognizable.

[00:05:08] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:05:08] Trey Gerrald: So I decided. Uh, I would just do it on my own. So I did all of the women... it's on my Instagram. So yeah, so I did bedazzle this, oh, with, uh, two different color rhinestones.

[00:05:18] Chelsey Donn: You're se- yes I see it, 'cause it really makes it pop.

[00:05:20] Trey Gerrald: This was my hobby before I had, um, a podcast. Speaking of-

[00:05:25] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. [laughs]

[00:05:26] Trey Gerrald: Do you have any Halloween complaints? 'Cause I think that you should have the opportunity to-

[00:05:32] Lodge A Complaint!

[00:05:32] VOICEOVER: Lodge a Compliant.

[00:05:33] Chelsey Donn: You know when you have, like, a jar or a water bottle and it has like that silicon piece around the inside of it that's, that has very good intentions. Like it's, it's meant to keep it locked and closed and so that no water comes out or whatever it is that you're trying to, you know, kind of air suction tight.

[00:05:48] Trey Gerrald: Mm-hmm [affirmative].

[00:05:48] Chelsey Donn: But when they start to fall off, it's like a-

[00:05:58] Trey Gerrald: [laughs]

[00:05:58] Chelsey Donn: Downhill battle from there. Like you, you just know it's near the end.

[00:06:02] Trey Gerrald: This is the internal, like, little liner piece inside-

[00:06:06] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:06:06] Trey Gerrald: That keeps the suction going.

[00:06:07] Chelsey Donn: And then, like I, I bought this water bottle for Goldie that I love-

[00:06:13] Trey Gerrald: Mm.

[00:06:13] Chelsey Donn: It's amazing and it has this amazing contraption where basically you can, you can pour water out and filter water back through, but it like sends it through a filter, so like you never get in a situation where you're like, okay, this is full and I gotta go, what am I gonna do? Amazing but that, that thing is starting to come off and so sometimes it can't close-

[00:06:32] Trey Gerrald: Right.

[00:06:33] Chelsey Donn: Exactly the way that it's supposed to close and we've been having a little bit of leaking for this product that I love and it's upsetting and I just wanted to lodge a complaint about that.

[00:06:42] Trey Gerrald: I hear you, and the good thing about our Review That Review water bottles-

[00:06:46] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:06:46] Trey Gerrald: Is that they're insulated and they don't have a separate little silicon piece.

[00:06:50] Chelsey Donn: No, there's no separate silicon piece. This is all... this is a two piece item that one person who is on our mailing list is going to win, so-

[00:07:02] Trey Gerrald: It is a great water bottle. Uh, obviously it's our podcast, but every time I drink out of it, I get excited.

[00:07:06] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, it's true. All right, Trey, what about you?

[00:07:09] Trey Gerrald: It's a good complaint, that is-

[00:07:10] Chelsey Donn: Thank you.

[00:07:10] Trey Gerrald: One of those things where it's like the shelf life of that product has to be shortened because-

[00:07:15] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:07:15] Trey Gerrald: Of this one little piece, which is really annoying.

[00:07:18] Chelsey Donn: And it's like perfect before then, you know? So anyway, that's my complaint. Let's get something off your chest. What is it? What's going on?

[00:07:27] Trey Gerrald: So, okay, so today, my complaint is... I'm afraid it might be a little bit ageist, so-

[00:07:34] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:07:34] Trey Gerrald: My intention is not ageist, uh, attacks-

[00:07:38] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:07:38] Trey Gerrald: Something that really does annoy me is-

[00:07:40] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm [affirmative].

[00:07:40] Trey Gerrald: It's, it's usually something that occurs when you are over a certain age. But not always. It really bothers me when people keep the clicking sound on their iPhone when they're texting.

[00:07:54] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god.

[00:07:54] Trey Gerrald: So anytime you're next to someone and it's like... it is so-

[00:07:58] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god.

[00:07:59] Trey Gerrald: That is so annoying.

[00:08:00] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:08:01] Trey Gerrald: It does occur over like family gatherings-

[00:08:04] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:08:04] Trey Gerrald: Where someone will be texting and it's like we're all on the couch hanging out and it's just like... like it's not even a real thing, like that's a totally fake sound-

[00:08:14] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:08:14] Trey Gerrald: To emulate keyboards-

[00:08:16] Chelsey Donn: A typewriter.

[00:08:16] Trey Gerrald: Which is, right, which was originally the type writer-

[00:08:19] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:08:19] Trey Gerrald: Which actually made the sounds because it was hitting the thing to touch the paper.

[00:08:22] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:08:23] Trey Gerrald: So it just... it really serves no point. There's no reason to have it.

[00:08:26] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I was gonna say, I mean you brought it up, but like I was gonna say you think it's just because when, like, we hear that noise, we're just like, "Where is that setting? Like I must turn it off immediately." Like I, like will not do anything else until I get this setting off. My god, that's annoying. But to them, it's not so annoying, and, and it's also like too many steps to turn it off. Why don't you just le- like what do you think... is there anybody that's really getting enjoyment out of it?

[00:08:51] Trey Gerrald: I, um, so I will say, there is something pleasurable about the sound. I'm also a person that finds gasoline to smell good, even though that's not-

[00:08:59] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:09:00] Trey Gerrald: You know, not really a go- pleasant smell. Like, there is something satisfying about the clicking.

[00:09:04] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:09:05] Trey Gerrald: But, when it's not your phone and you have nothing to do with it, but all you can hear is the like-

[00:09:12] Chelsey Donn: Random clicking?

[00:09:13] Trey Gerrald: Gosh it really bothers me.

[00:09:14] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:09:15] Trey Gerrald: So, um, I've had that on my list for awhile and I've been a little concerned about sharing it 'cause I don't wanna be making fun of old people 'cause I, I'm getting older every day. I don't know about you. It, it does occur to me as a nuisance, and so I have to lodge it and put it in our ledger of complaints, so thank you for hearing me out.

[00:09:30] Chelsey Donn: Yes, it's, it's, it's been heard and it's also been notated that it has no attachment to any sort of ageism.

[00:09:36] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Then we're good.

[00:09:38] Chelsey Donn: Yup. Okay.

[00:09:39] Trey Gerrald: Well here we are, should we, should we, um, jump into our Halloween ooky scary terrifying murderous trick or treat special themed edition?

[00:09:53] Chelsey Donn: I think we definitely should and do you think that we should both tell stories of, like, crazy Halloween stories, we can each tell one but then we can only let the Patreon hear it maybe?

[00:10:03] Trey Gerrald: Oh that's good. We'll do, yeah, well yes. I have, I have a lot of Halloween stories that I can share. I'm very into Halloween.

[00:10:08] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Okay. I mean, I have one that I'm thinking of, so just wanted to like take this opportunity to say if you're listening and you don't have Patreon, you might miss out on some epic Halloween stories.

[00:10:20] Trey Gerrald: I love that. Okay, well, should we jump into some online reviews, Chelsey dear?

[00:10:26] Chelsey Donn: I think we should, am I first today?

[00:10:28] Trey Gerrald: You are.

[00:10:29] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God, yay, I feel like I haven't been first in awhile, but I know I have been 'cause it's every other.

[00:10:34] Trey Gerrald: Ah. [laughs]

[00:10:35] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] All right. As you guys know, we are your trusty Review Queens, we each bring in a review from the internet that we feel needs to be inspected.

[00:10:44] Trey Gerrald: We read you the review, we break it down and rate the impact of the review on a scale from one to five crowns. It's a very regal process that we call

[00:10:54] VOICEOVER: Assess That Kvetch!

[00:10:56] Trey Gerrald: And obviously we're gonna be Halloween theme today and Chelsey girl-

[00:11:01] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] Yes.

[00:11:02] Trey Gerrald: Take it away RQ.

[00:11:06] Inflatible Dinosaur Costume Review

[00:11:06] VOICEOVER: Review that Review.

[00:11:09] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Do we wanna talk about how we picked the same review or do we wanna wait until I read mine? [laughs]

[00:11:15] Trey Gerrald: So, you know, we have discussed this before, we don't share what our reviews are prior, but we have started to sort of communicate, "I'm picking something in this genre from this website." So, today-

[00:11:27] Chelsey Donn: [laughs]

[00:11:28] Trey Gerrald: We realized that Chelsey and I both picked the same-

[00:11:32] Chelsey Donn: Independently.

[00:11:33] Trey Gerrald: Independently on our 21st episode.

[00:11:35] Chelsey Donn: We did it.

[00:11:36] Trey Gerrald: We picked the same exact review. So I'm curious to see if it was the same review.

[00:11:39] Chelsey Donn: I am so curious to hear 'cause I wanna say I looked a long time and I, I don't wanna oversell this review, but it really took me awhile to find what I was looking for, so we'll see if we trust-

[00:11:50] Trey Gerrald: Great.

[00:11:51] Chelsey Donn: Muy Malo, M-U-Y M-A-L-O. Now, you know, I only took like three or four years of Spanish I wanna say, in college, but I think that Muy Malo means very bad. So, is Muy Malo, muy malo, um, or muy bueno? I think we will have to listen to the review to find out. It's a one star review of Ruby's Giant Inflatable Dinosaur Suit Costume. Okay. If you'd like to experience the horror of having a large plastic bag stuck on your head, this costume is for you.

[00:12:33] Chelsey Donn: Seriously, this is a huge suffocation hazard. The tiny fan barely pumps enough air to keep the plastic off your body. Getting into the costume is only slightly easier than trying to extract yourself from it, and visibility once you're trapped within it is reduced to a three inch blurry window. Imagine trying to look through a plastic storage bin from Walmart, but then skew the visibility up even more by making it bendy.

[00:13:07] Trey Gerrald: [laughs]

[00:13:09] Chelsey Donn: Upon dawning the garment, anyone even remotely warm blooded begins to sweat immediately and condensation from your limited breathing adds to the humidity within. Feeling claustrophobic yet? You haven't even put your feet on, which guess what? You can't reach because bending over isn't really possible. Your cries to 'take this infernal theropod off me' cannot be heard. Your voice has been dampened by thick plastic.

[00:13:45] Trey Gerrald: Oh my god.

[00:13:45] Chelsey Donn: And your movements are limited to thrashing like someone half stuck in a straight jacket. You can't see out of it, so the antics of stumbling around seem very cheery to your friends, watching, dry and cool, and not encased in 10 pounds of air tight, constricting plastic. The thin air further blocks your vision and the amazingly loud motor begins to let off a harsh chemical from the lubricants, further increasing the toxicity of the atmosphere inside. Once you actually fall, from lack of air, your friends should figure out something's wrong, lean close to hear your screams and open the zipper.

[00:14:33] Chelsey Donn: They will then pull you limp from the T-Rex encased in the afterbirth of your sweat and whatever residue keeps the plastic shiny, and proceed to laugh at you. Congrats, you purchased an inflatable T-rex costume. Seriously, this thing is awful. Don't purchase it.

[00:15:01] Trey Gerrald: Oh. Muy Malo.

[00:15:03] Chelsey Donn: Muy Malo had a muy malo experience.

[00:15:06] Trey Gerrald: I did not find this review.

[00:15:08] Chelsey Donn: Oh really?

[00:15:09] Trey Gerrald: Okay, Muy Malo, I actually really do appreciate this review because-

[00:15:13] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:15:13] Trey Gerrald: They bring up a lot of points I was, I was curious what the experience of being inside of an inflated airbag-

[00:15:21] Chelsey Donn: Correct.

[00:15:21] Trey Gerrald: Would be, so I actually really do appreciate the context, specifically the mention of condensation. That was my main question-

[00:15:29] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:15:29] Trey Gerrald: If this was like this little like plastic square to see out of in the, like, chest, the sternum of the dinosaur, I was curious if you were in there and you're sweating, it's gonna get foggy and, and the condensation's gonna be-

[00:15:41] Chelsey Donn: Gross.

[00:15:41] Trey Gerrald: Too much.

[00:15:42] Chelsey Donn: Right. And then also, the, the fact that you're in... well just so you know, that's why I was searching for four hours for, like, this review because I kept thinking, like, I see these costumes all the time and I think, it can't be comfortable inside of there.

[00:15:58] Trey Gerrald: [laughs]

[00:15:58] Chelsey Donn: Like you got... first of all you're humongous, so you can't even like, turn to get a crudités item or something 'cause you can knock out God knows what and beyond that the fan inside, you're suffocating in there, like you just... it just seemed terrible to me and I wanted someone to walk me through that experience. And this was the first person that I found that, that did that. Another thought that I had about Muy Malo was now I definitely felt like they were giving us amateur Open Mic Stand Up comedy a little bit. That being said, pretty good. You know, like, I've seen a lot of open mic comics that have had worse material than this. I think they were definitely trying to give us humor. Now, my, my question about the humor, because I, it's there and it was with intention, do we think that they are giving us their true experience and just sort of like building in comedy or do we think that they are-

[00:16:54] Trey Gerrald: I, I appreciate that you're bringing this up 'cause I, I actually appreciated the device early on when they said, "Are you feeling claustrophobic yet?"

[00:17:04] Chelsey Donn: Right, same.

[00:17:05] Trey Gerrald: Like I thought that was really funny. But then when it got to like-

[00:17:08] Trey Gerrald: Yes.

[00:17:08] Trey Gerrald: Then you're gonna, like, fall over and then your friends gonna unzip you and then they're gonna laugh at you-

[00:17:12] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:17:12] Trey Gerrald: And then you're gonna feel stupid, that I sort of felt like, uh, now you're like-

[00:17:17] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, that's what I mean by the open mic comedy bit. It's like we got this, like, funny bit and then we just decided to keep building on it, I think he needs to workshop this material.

[00:17:25] Trey Gerrald: I guess my, my thought is like I'm not coming to the review section of Amazon for your comedy.

[00:17:32] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:17:32] Trey Gerrald: And I do think the impact of the review would be stronger if they just stuck with the facts ma'am.

[00:17:38] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] Yes.

[00:17:39] Trey Gerrald: Because it didn't occur to me that the friend would have to unzip you.

[00:17:42] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:17:43] Trey Gerrald: I guess you can't zip yourself up, that you have to have someone do that, right?

[00:17:48] Chelsey Donn: Well, yeah, you can't unzip yourself when you're in there. Like, god forbid you should need to go to the bathroom and you're alone, there's only one option. Like, it's just, it just seems like such a high liability Halloween costume, you know?

[00:18:01] Trey Gerrald: It on- it just seems thoroughly impractical.

[00:18:03] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:18:03] Trey Gerrald: It seems like it would be funny outside-

[00:18:06] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:18:07] Trey Gerrald: I cannot imagine going to a Halloween party-

[00:18:09] Chelsey Donn: [laughs]

[00:18:09] Trey Gerrald: You can't do, you can't do it.

[00:18:11] Chelsey Donn: No, you can't.

[00:18:12] Trey Gerrald: I really am like taken by this review. The va- it really is valuable to me because they really walk through all of the reasons this is just impractical.

[00:18:20] Chelsey Donn: Right. Yes. They really do. Like everything about this review would make me not want to be in this.

[00:18:26] Trey Gerrald: It makes me feel very sticky.

[00:18:28] Chelsey Donn: Yes. It makes me feel very claustrophobic. "Feeling claustrophobic yet?" Yes, yes I am.

[00:18:34] Trey Gerrald: They said that it is ten pounds of plastic. That can't be accurate.

[00:18:38] Chelsey Donn: I think it can.

[00:18:40] Trey Gerrald: Really?

[00:18:41] Chelsey Donn: I do because a lot of the reviews for these inflatables talked about how the pumps often times couldn't actually inflate them-

[00:18:49] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I saw those too.

[00:18:50] Chelsey Donn: And that to me would lead me to believe that it must be quite heavy and require quite a force to get that air in there, and I believe it was probably 10 pounds. I, I think that that's not so crazy.

[00:19:04] Trey Gerrald: I also came across a lot of reviews saying that the zipper broke the very first attempt of zipping it.

[00:19:10] Chelsey Donn: Same, I came across those, too.

[00:19:12] Trey Gerrald: Did you come across any pictures of people that had to duct tape holes closed?

[00:19:16] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:19:16] Trey Gerrald: 'Cause that's the most hilarious part.

[00:19:18] Chelsey Donn: I did, especially the ones that were, uh, I know we're getting off topic, but especially the ones that were like mothers of people that were buying it for their kids and like-

[00:19:26] Trey Gerrald: Yes.

[00:19:27] Chelsey Donn: My child was crying and like all I could do was duct tape his tears away, you know?

[00:19:32] Trey Gerrald: I do think if, if, when we have our first live show, we both have to come out in these inflatable dinos. I think it's been decided.

[00:19:39] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god.

[00:19:40] Trey Gerrald: Even though I do think that the, I do think that this is probably a common experience.

[00:19:44] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:19:45] Trey Gerrald: I do think that Muy Malo is being truthful. The humor isn't really there. I mean it's sort of like, uh, uh, it's not really that funny to me. I find this to be incredibly valuable, and I think the impact is that... I mean, I think it's just kind of fun and crazy to like-

[00:20:00] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:20:01] Trey Gerrald: Be in this air inflatable thing. But, what is the spelling grammar like?

[00:20:06] Chelsey Donn: Spelling grammar is excellent. Really, really solid I'd say. In fact, they, they use like some significant words I didn't even really know, like "take this infernal theropod?" I don't even know what a theropod is. Is that bad?

[00:20:18] Trey Gerrald: I didn't know what that was either, no.

[00:20:20] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:20:21] Trey Gerrald: Well-

[00:20:21] Chelsey Donn: I think I can crown it.

[00:20:22] Trey Gerrald: I think I can crown this too, yeah.

[00:20:24] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Let's do it.

[00:20:25] Trey Gerrald: All right, so Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards and in an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another, we will simultaneous reveal our rating cards.

[00:20:39] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating.

[00:20:41] Trey Gerrald: I'm ready, you ready?

[00:20:42] Chelsey Donn: Okay, I'm ready.

[00:20:47] VOICEOVER: Total Score.

[00:20:49] Trey Gerrald: Tie.

[00:20:50] Chelsey Donn: Okay, tie, ta- ta- [laughs] Trey and I are both holding up four crowns. All right, Trey, let us know, why did you decide four crowns for Muy Malo?

[00:21:01] Trey Gerrald: I mean, I really found this to be a thoroughly valuable, well written review.

[00:21:07] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:21:08] Trey Gerrald: The comedy is where it lost me. I wanted to do... I almost did four and a half, but eh, I do, I, I really believe the review, I think this is what the experience would be-

[00:21:18] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:21:19] Trey Gerrald: I just... because they attempted humor and I, and personally felt it fall flat-

[00:21:24] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:21:25] Trey Gerrald: I decided to go with four. I took one crown away for that. What about you? Why did you say four?

[00:21:30] Chelsey Donn: I said four because I thought, like you, like you actually brought up quite eloquently, like, stick to the truth. Stick to the narrative. Like we can, we can still put in jokes and keep it to what actually happened and I think the fact that we went off a little bit in la la land, like when we were, we were in reality and then we certainly, suddenly, sorry, transferred into la la land, it just was like I don't really know if I can trust you Muy Malo, so that like little bit of inclination for the suspicious factor here is what made me give Muy Malo four crowns and take away that one crown.

[00:22:06] Trey Gerrald: Fair, yeah, I agree.

[00:22:08] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:22:09] Trey Gerrald: All right. Very fun. Well-

[00:22:11] Chelsey Donn: Thanks.

[00:22:11] Trey Gerrald: Let's take a quick break and when we come back, we can get into my review.

[00:22:15] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god, I can't wait.

[00:22:16] Trey Gerrald: B-R-B.

[00:22:20] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown, we'll be right back.

[00:22:32] Review Queen Exclusive Offer: superchewer.com/queen

[00:22:32] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey and I are so excited to share this exclusive Review Queen offer from Super Chewer dot com that is worthy of five crowns, honey child. Now, from the makers of BarkBox, Super Chewer is a monthly subscription based service for those dogs that need tougher and more durable toys. Every month you and your pup will receive a box right to your front door that is loaded with two tough toys that are always fluff free, two meaty chews and two full sized bags of treats that are customizable for allergy and diet preferences. Plus, all Super Chewer treats are always made in the USA and Canada, with globally sourced ingredients and never contain corn, wheat or soy.

[00:23:15] Trey Gerrald: Now, close your eyes, unless you're driving, and imagine the joy your dog will have when that pesky mailman brings something that is just for them once a month. Super Chewer is offering listeners of Review that Review one extra month free, which is a $45 value child, when you use our link: SUPERCHEWER.COM/QUEEN. Super Chewer comes with a 100% happiness guarantee. So if a toy isn't tough enough, they will replace it, 100% free of charge. Now what dog doesn't wanna take that challenge?

[00:23:50] Trey Gerrald: Sign up right now at Super Chewer dot com slash queen and give your good boy something that is good enough for them. SUPERCHEWER.COM/QUEEN.

[00:24:15] Trey Gerrald: [singing] Who let the dogs out? Who let them out?

[00:24:24] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god.

[00:24:26] Trey Gerrald: Once again, if you're not on Patreon, you're really missing, um-

[00:24:29] Chelsey Donn: [laughs]

[00:24:29] Trey Gerrald: Some lip syncing action.

[00:24:30] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] That was so- and it was like very pleasing, sorry, to like my voice coming out of this beautiful character was-

[00:24:37] Trey Gerrald: [laughs]

[00:24:37] Chelsey Donn: Actually like a nice experience for me as well, so thank you.

[00:24:41] Trey Gerrald: Oh, you're na- kind.

[00:24:43] Meryl-Go-Round

[00:24:43] Trey Gerrald: It's game time. All right. Chelsey, it is time for you and I to strap in on the Meryl-Go-Round.

[00:24:51] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:24:52] VOICEOVER: I don't feel like an icon. Most of the days I feel like I can't. That's with an A.

[00:24:59] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] Hi, okay, [laughs] sorry. I just got lost in your beautiful eyes. Okay, so Trey and I have each picked a rotten, scathing, pithy one star zinger and with 30 seconds on the clock, not a second more, we'll each try and recite our zinger in as many genres as possible.

[00:25:20] Trey Gerrald: Just like Queen Meryl who does it all.

[00:25:22] Chelsey Donn: Has she done a halloween movie? I don't know. Before the clock runs out.

[00:25:26] Trey Gerrald: Death Becomes Her.

[00:25:27] Chelsey Donn: Oh yeah, that's true. Death Becomes Her, duh. And Goldie Hawn, you know? Goldie, Goldie.

[00:25:32] Trey Gerrald: That's right.

[00:25:32] Chelsey Donn: Anyway, all right Trey, where is your one star zinger from today?

[00:25:37] Trey Gerrald: Okay, I have two and I'm really not sure which one to pick. I'm gonna move my mouse around until I pick.

[00:25:45] Chelsey Donn: Okay. I think that on this Halloween themed Meryl Go Round, 'cause you showed it to me and I can't get the image of it out of my head. I feel like in a really, like, fierce way, you're riding like a giant version of that knife, but you're like seated on the top part that's like not sharp, you know? And you're like just this bad ass riding on this knife, like yeah, stay out of my way, don't come near me.

[00:26:12] Trey Gerrald: Would you call me a Scream Queen?

[00:26:15] Chelsey Donn: I would say you are undeniably a Scream Queen riding on that fancy bedazzled knife.

[00:26:22] Trey Gerrald: Okay, so-

[00:26:23] Chelsey Donn: [laughs]

[00:26:23] Trey Gerrald: My review today is from Amazon dot com, this is a one star review from Jennifer R.

[00:26:33] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:26:33] Trey Gerrald: And this is, um, I'll tell you what it is, but the subject is "Not as described."

[00:26:38] Chelsey Donn: [laughs] Okay.

[00:26:38] Trey Gerrald: And this is for, also Rubies.

[00:26:40] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:26:41] Trey Gerrald: Rubies Secret Wishes Women's Nightmare on Elm Street, Miss Kreugar Sexy Costume.

[00:26:51] Chelsey Donn: Oh wow.

[00:26:52] Trey Gerrald: So this is a sexy Freddie Kreugar costume for a woman.

[00:26:55] Chelsey Donn: Okay, sure.

[00:26:56] Trey Gerrald: Jennifer R, one star review, subject is "not as described", and the zinger is "dress was sized for a toddler."

[00:27:04] Chelsey Donn: [laughs]

[00:27:05] Trey Gerrald: [laughs] Because it's a slutty Freddie Kreugar shirt dress.

[00:27:09] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:27:10] Trey Gerrald: Alright.

[00:27:11] Chelsey Donn: Okay, Trey, do you feel ready?

[00:27:13] Trey Gerrald: I'm ready, I'm strapped in on my bloody knife.

[00:27:16] Chelsey Donn: Your bloody knife [laughs] that you ride so well, and let's do it.

[00:27:21] Trey Gerrald: I'm ready, let's go.

[00:27:22] VOICEOVER: Three, two, one, go.