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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 28: "Macy's Santaland - 1 & 5 Stars"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 28: "Macy's Santaland - 1 & 5 Stars"


*Please pardon any spelling errors.

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:31] Chelsey Donn: Hello!

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Oh my gosh. Hi. Hello listeners. Welcome to Review That Review. We are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:39] Chelsey Donn: Reviews. We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:52] Trey Gerrald: That voice is Chelsey Donn,

[00:00:53] Chelsey Donn: and that voice is Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:56] Trey Gerrald: And our voices together, are,

[00:00:58] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens.

[00:01:02] Trey Gerrald: And if you want to support the show while getting bonus and exclusive content, including a members only After-Show podcast, visit our patreon page, at Chelsey girl. I've missed you. We had a proper week off how's your week been?

[00:01:19] Chelsey Donn: I know, it's crazy. I mean, it really does feel like I haven't seen you in eons. My week was a little dulled without you. I'm going to be honest.

[00:01:27] Trey Gerrald: Are you calling me a flamer?

[00:01:30] Chelsey Donn: I ...not intentionally. You could adapt as you will, but no, no. Um, it was a good week. I went to an art show in person for Ashley Longshore, who is my mother's favorite artist.

[00:01:44] Trey Gerrald: Okay.

[00:01:44] Chelsey Donn: So she insisted that I go, but that being said, it was amazing. Her art is incredible. She's amazing. I had a good time. I just am happy whenever I do anything that resembles like pre 2020 life, you know.

[00:01:59] Trey Gerrald: Of course.

[00:02:00] Chelsey Donn: How about you? How was your week? Where were you, Trey?

[00:02:03] Trey Gerrald: I had a good week. We took a week off because I went to visit my nephews and sister and former Royal Highness inductee, brother-in-law in Charlotte, North Carolina. We had a lovely trip and it was really. And here we are. We are back in the full swing of things with a very fun episode. I can't wait to jump in.

[00:02:26] Chelsey Donn: I know I'm so like delighted if you're on Patreon right now, you might have a little bit of a sneak peek. My screen game has been upped significantly. I don't know if you guys remember when I told you about the issue with the skateboard girl and how she made it very unrealistic. I returned that green screen. I bought a new one. That is, it was a little bit more and I was hesitant to buy it the first time as me. Now, sometimes you get what you pay for, and this one is so much better, which I'm very happy about, but mostly I think Trey is thrilled.

[00:03:03] Trey Gerrald: It looks gorgeous.

[00:03:05] Chelsey Donn: Thank you. Thank you so much.

[00:03:07] Trey Gerrald: Screw skateboard girl, get her out of.

[00:03:09] Chelsey Donn: Yes, totally.

[00:03:10] Trey Gerrald: Was there anyone interesting on the cover of this box?

[00:03:12] Chelsey Donn: They weren't going as much with a gimmick as the other one, which I, in this case, I actually liked, they had a video of somebody truly unboxing the item. And then I also went to the reviews, you know, as I do. And I saw in the comment section. A customer had also posted a video. So between those two things, I was pretty confident I was going to be okay. I'm not going to lie. There were some negative reviews. So there was a part of me that was a little worried, but thank God all has worked out.

[00:03:45] Lodge A Complaint

[00:03:45] Chelsey Donn: Ah, you know, and with all that gratitude for companies that are truthful and honest, Do you have a complaint that you want to Lodge?

[00:03:56] Trey Gerrald: You know, I think that I really would love to...

[00:03:58] VOICEOVER: Lodge a Complaint

[00:04:00] Trey Gerrald: I am going to lodge a complaint against a trend that has been growing specially in the world of social media. I am so sick of these arbitrary made up social influencer national holidays. Hashtag national dog day, which is different than national pet day, which is different from national cat day. Okay. I just want you to see, I have two sticky notes here. I've done some research. This is just a list. I'm not talking about like actual national holidays-

[00:04:36] Chelsey Donn: right? Of course. You're talking about world donut day.

[00:04:39] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Let me tell you, I just, this is just a few I've written down. It's a lengthy list. Please hold your applause to the end.

[00:04:45] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:04:45] Trey Gerrald: Pie Day. Which is um not-

[00:04:48] Chelsey Donn: well that's 3/14,

[00:04:49] Trey Gerrald: no, not March 14th, but you think it would be, this is December 1st, which is P I E day. We also have Mutt Day. We have-

[00:05:00] Chelsey Donn: mud?

[00:05:00] Trey Gerrald: Mutt! Like-

[00:05:02] Chelsey Donn: mud?

[00:05:03] Trey Gerrald: Mutt, like a mixed breed dog. A mutt.

[00:05:06] Chelsey Donn: OH MUTT! Oh wow. Okay.

[00:05:09] Trey Gerrald: Faux fur day, bartender day, brownie day, pretend to be a time traveler day, app day. Today, december 15th, unless you're listening late is cupcake day.

[00:05:23] Trey Gerrald: We also have a date nut bread day coffee cake day, girl, me too day, barbershop day, yellow bat day, a raising day, a bugs bunny day Y okay. Then I just to complete my complaint. Chelsey, do you know what national holidays are observed on your day of birth? Which is June 22nd.

[00:05:45] Chelsey Donn: Are they bad?

[00:05:46] Trey Gerrald: Kissing Day.

[00:05:47] Chelsey Donn: Oh, I like that.

[00:05:48] Trey Gerrald: Don't know why that's not Valentine's day. HVAC tech day,

[00:05:53] Chelsey Donn: HVAC tech day?!

[00:05:55] Trey Gerrald: Same as you Baby,. And then onions also onion ring day,

[00:06:01] Chelsey Donn: which I don't like onion rings.

[00:06:02] Trey Gerrald: You want to hear what nationally holiday celebration? days, on my day of birth, which is March 14th, PI day, PI. That makes sense. Sure. Learn about butterflies day. And potato chip day. Anyway, I hate these. I hate them. I hate when they pop, it seems like every other day is dog day. Every it's like, why? Why, why?

[00:06:26] Chelsey Donn: Marketing!

[00:06:27] Trey Gerrald: It's just, it makes me so angry. I don't care. I don't care that it's celebrate pumpkin butterfly cupcake day. Get out of town. I don't care. I hate it. It's so obnoxious. Just be creative. When you post things online, you don't need an excuse. And that's my complaint.

[00:06:44] Chelsey Donn: Complaint lodged added to the ledger. Completely agree. It's gotten out of hand. It started with the hashtags and Instagram, I think really, really up the national whatevers day, but you're right.

[00:06:58] Trey Gerrald: Especially because no one knows what it is until you see that someone else has posted. And then you're like, "Oh!"

[00:07:03] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. And then I feel bad. Like, oh, I didn't post a picture of my dog on national dog day or national pet day or national. Animal. I don't know. It's just too many things. National puppy day.

[00:07:14] Trey Gerrald: Exactly.

[00:07:15] Chelsey Donn: Whatever.

[00:07:16] Trey Gerrald: Alright, that's my complaint. Chelsey. What about you about your complaint? That happens quite a bit.

[00:07:22] Chelsey Donn: I want to complain about junk mail. Have we done this before? I don't know, but I think it's time if we haven't then, I mean, we're, we're sleeping at the wheel. Like what is with the junk mail? I feel like every day it gets worse. You know how they say you spend like. However much percentage of your life asleep. Like it's like you spend a third of your life asleep. I think there's a very heavy portion of that chart. That is me just deleting emails. I think I've unsubscribed from best buy, like six times. And yet it keeps happening.

[00:07:58] Trey Gerrald: It's like promotion@bestbuydotcom,, email twice a week at it's like 700 accounts.

[00:08:06] Chelsey Donn: UnBelievable. I spend so much of my time, like any time that I have free from doing other things, you will find me erasing junk mail because I also. I'm, you know, I'm kind of OCD. So I really do not like my email inbox to be overloaded. It's like, seriously bothers me. Like if I have 20 emails that are kind of unread, they're 20 emails that are unread for a reason, because I need to get back to them. Otherwise get out of there cause I need to stay focused. Oh, just the amount of time. What are we going to do about it? Try it. How do we fix.

[00:08:48] Trey Gerrald: I hadn't really thought about that. It is something that I will mindlessly do throughout the day. I was like, cause I like to keep my email clean. I wasn't even conscious that I do that. I'm also someone that cannot have a bubble notification. Like a text. I can't have the red circle. No, no, no. I can't know that like, something has been unintended to, and it's something that I've recently last couple of months have been letting go of is I have to open it so that the little like red bubble appears like that, that it has been opened and it goes away for years, I would have to open it so that it would change from like white to gray, meaning that it has been opened. And then I would delete it, which I don't know what that says about me.

[00:09:32] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Cause I emails. I don't even open the email. I just like in the iPhone, I just do a slide.

[00:09:40] Trey Gerrald: Yes. But I used to be so neurotic that I had to open it. I wouldn't even look at it. I just needed the color to change. Showing that it had been opened before I would delete it.

[00:09:53] Chelsey Donn: That's a commitment. Yeah. So that's even more time then try. I mean, imagine if we added up all that time, I think both of us would be very upset.

[00:10:02] Trey Gerrald: You know, it makes me think about waiting in long lines, which I think,

[00:10:07] Chelsey Donn: oh might be appropriate!

[00:10:08] Trey Gerrald: it makes me think about something that has, uh, been on my mind. And I think that it's time Chelsey for you and I to go, Head-To-Head!

[00:10:19] Chelsey Donn: Let's do it. I got my boxing gloves on when I was a kid, my S my dad bought boxing gloves for me and my sister, so that we could duke it out. Actually, if we had a fight, which some parents might say it was bad parenting, but I think it was a great idea.

[00:10:33] Trey Gerrald: I appreciate your father's commitment to non gender stereotypes. I applaud that it's very progressive for that. The eighties.

[00:10:41] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I'm ready. I got my gloves on. Trey. Let's do this!

[00:10:43] Trey Gerrald: Alright here we go.

[00:10:44] VOICEOVER: Assess That Kvetch!

[00:10:46] Trey Gerrald: All right, everyone. Today is yet again a VERSUS episode. Chelsey and I are going to cover a one star review and a five star review on the same topic: Macy's Santaland.

[00:11:06] Chelsey Donn: That's right, Santa, get that beard nice and tight. So for this versus episode, that was very weird...

[00:11:13] Trey Gerrald: [laughter]

[00:11:13] Chelsey Donn: I just meant because when it's fake, it's like they could just rip it down, you know, like pull up. Okay.

[00:11:23] Trey Gerrald: Now we need to say what SantaLand is in case anyone is confused. I did write this down.

[00:11:29] Chelsey Donn: Miracle on 34th Street, the like newer one with, with Mara Wilson. I mean, the newer being that it was the nineties,

[00:11:36] Trey Gerrald: but I think that the original took place there as well.

[00:11:38] Chelsey Donn: Oh, really? Okay. Well I just the nineties one...

[00:11:41] Trey Gerrald: Well...Miracle on 34th street?

[00:11:42] Chelsey Donn: No, I know, but I'm just saying, oh, right. I'm an idiot. Yes. Okay. There we go.

[00:11:49] Trey Gerrald: Okay, So just so everyone is up to snuff. Santaland is very famous because in the early 1860s,

[00:11:59] Chelsey Donn: Oh, my God,

[00:12:00] Trey Gerrald: the Macy's department store headquarters, which is in Herald square, Manhattan created a visit with Santa Claus experience and it has been going strong ever since

[00:12:13] Chelsey Donn: I did not know this was since the 18 hundreds. Wow.

[00:12:17] Trey Gerrald: The early 1860s. So then, so their website claims that more than 200,000 guests have visited Santaland inside Macy's Herald square alone almost every year. Since 1977, they weren't tallying people prior to 1977. So it's been even more so. And it's, you know, it's just a wonderful Macy's tradition that started at that flagship store. And also most people will know that Macy's right in front of their, store. They host the Thanksgiving day parade and the Christmas day parade.

[00:12:51] Chelsey Donn: Yes, the Macy's day parade. And also it's very competitive to be the Santa. I mean, because it's the real one, right? You don't have kids listening to those.

[00:13:01] Trey Gerrald: I know we should sort of say like, don't let kids listen to us because we're going to be working on big, real. Okay. All right. So that's what Santaland is in case anyone didn't really know. So it's like the most premium version of like the mall Santa Claus.

[00:13:15] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, the creme de la creme

[00:13:17] Trey Gerrald: and it is a village that is like taking over multiple levels and multiple floors. If you're on Patreon, you can see just like a tiny portion of it on Chelsey green screen, but they hire hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people to portray elves and there's all these little houses and villages. I've never been. Okay.

[00:13:37] Chelsey Donn: And they start pretty early. Right. They start like in November, like very they're there on this.

[00:13:43] Trey Gerrald: I would imagine it's After Thanksgiving, maybe even the week of Thanksgiving. All right.

[00:13:48] Chelsey Donn: This is a versus episode and Trey selected the five-star. I selected the one-star. We got to figure out who's going to go first. Trey's got the quarter ready? I think. Am I guessing you guess this time? Okay. So I'm going to get swept that quarter.

[00:14:02] Trey Gerrald: Try. I'm going to catch up this time unlike, okay. Four

[00:14:05] Chelsey Donn: weeks ago. Okay. Heads!'s tails. Okay. That's fine. I've, I've been on a losing streak with a quarter, but that means we are going to hear the five star review first from Trey so let's hear it. RQ T

[00:14:20] Trey Gerrald: okay, here we go.

[00:14:23] Macy's Santaland 5 Star Review

[00:14:23] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:14:28] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So I was really stock with choosing between these two. Oh, I think it is worthy of me doing the other one on the Patreon on the after show fair only because it's like, I cannot pick one or the other so Sophie's choice. Okay. So today I have a five star review from Yelp that is written by Marianne W. Now, Marianne-

[00:14:53] Chelsey Donn: Do you think it's Marianne Williamson?

[00:14:56] Trey Gerrald: It's not, which I love that you just asked. Um, because I've been, uh, we're gonna get. Okay, you do need to know that Marianne is an elite reviewer. They have written over 2,500 reviews.

[00:15:11] Chelsey Donn: Oh my god. That's a lot. That's like more time than the emails.

[00:15:16] Trey Gerrald: They have attached 39,742 images. And whatever the person logo means. It says 5,000.

[00:15:28] Chelsey Donn: So I think that that's the people that have like, clicked. Like I liked it. I thought it was funny. It was helpful.

[00:15:33] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So this is the five star review from Mariannie W. Possibly debatable. And this is from Yelp for Macy's Santaland.

[00:15:47] Trey Gerrald: Santaland is a land of fantasy and dreams. It's also a huge money-making machine. Every year it's set up and the space fills with wide eyes and open mouths. The twinkling lights are a treat for your eyes. The sweet delights will be tantalizing your taste buds as you navigate the space. I can't forget to mention Santa. He visits every year. I remember the only time my parents brought me when I was little.

[00:16:21] Trey Gerrald: I wanted a Susie Walker doll that Christmas, when he asked me if I had been good, I said, yes. Then he asked if I ate all my peas, typical question in the 1950s, I lied and said yes, while my parents corrected me. Guess what? I got the doll that Christmas morning. In fact, looking back at the pictures from that year, I believe it is my most memorable and happiest Christmas mornings. The time when you have not been jaded by the cruel reality of life.

[00:16:59] Trey Gerrald: Our financial situation changed dramatically shortly after. Well, that's my story about Santa's land. When I dig out my holiday decorations, I may find the photos from that year. I will try to remember to post them here. I was a cute little devil........

[00:17:25] Trey Gerrald: what? That's not a Review of Santaland!.

[00:17:32] Chelsey Donn: I just, I'm starting to wonder how Mariannee things that Yelp should be. The lead reviewer. She's she must put, she must really get into it. It's almost like a short story. I was trying to think. What is Marianne Jean? Maybe it is Marianne Williamson.

[00:17:52] Trey Gerrald: So, 78 people have found it useful. 49 people found it funny and 71 found it. Cool.

[00:18:00] Chelsey Donn: All right. What. I like, because I got so lost in the story. Well, were we ever given any information about Santaland or was it just like my experience? This is my personal narrative essay for my college admissions, about my relationship to Macy Santaland.

[00:18:17] Trey Gerrald: What I get from Marianne's Review was that Marianne went once in the 1950s-

[00:18:21] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:18:21] Trey Gerrald: And left a review three years ago.

[00:18:29] Chelsey Donn: [laughter]

[00:18:31] Chelsey Donn: I think you're right. That's why, like, honestly, it was sort of a twist at the end when-

[00:18:38] Trey Gerrald: It got so dark when they lost the money.

[00:18:39] Chelsey Donn: Dark about the financial changes. Like I actually like gasped. It was just so sad. I felt so bad for Marianne's family. Also. I thought it was funny when she was like, I was a cute little devil. Like how old do we think Marianne is?

[00:18:55] Trey Gerrald: I mean, if they were a kid that wanted a doll

[00:19:00] Chelsey Donn: Yeah

[00:19:01] Trey Gerrald: and was asked if they ate their peas in the 1950s there, you know, today they're probably

[00:19:05] Chelsey Donn: They were probably born in the forties,

[00:19:08] Trey Gerrald: I would think. Yeah. I would think they would be around under 10 probably. Right. So they're at least late fifties sixties now.

[00:19:15] Chelsey Donn: Oh, that's wait. No, they're way older than that. If they're born in the forties.

[00:19:19] Trey Gerrald: Oh, 70 you're right. You're right, right. Um, I'm I like, I'm thinking it's like 2000. Um, I do that all the time and then they have attached a bunch of images that are not pictures from their visit in the 1950s, but random images of like the tiny little scary, like window doll.

[00:19:40] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Do we think that those are like stock images? Or do we think that Marianne just walked by the window and takes pictures?

[00:19:46] Trey Gerrald: I think based on like the angle of the camera and like the quality of the images, I think that Marianne took these herself.

[00:19:54] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Well, at least there's that. So I don't really know why I I'm not, really able to break down the psychology, but I will say that a very large part of Marianne W's identity is that she is this Yelp elite Reviewer I will say, I think she takes. Very seriously. Marianne sees something on the street. Doesn't matter if she's gone inside or not. She's gonna write a review about it.

[00:20:24] Trey Gerrald: Mmm, I can draw that conclusion from this because Marianne basically opens up by saying it's wonderful. It's a moneymaking machine. But boy, those twinkling lights are a treat and there are some delicious delights that will just tantalize you. It's like I'm doing a tongue twister.

[00:20:41] Chelsey Donn: Yes. Well, that's why I was like, when did they? Cause I was like, I remember at one point they did give some information that was applicable to Santaland at large. I wrote down that they said that it was a money-making machine. Cause I actually like that. They said that like, and it's a five star review. Like that, kind of makes me feel better when they're like, it is a money-making machine, but to me it's still magic. So that message I think is a, is a good one.

[00:21:10] Trey Gerrald: But I tell you it's free. You don't there's no admission fee. Okay.

[00:21:18] Chelsey Donn: It's drawing a crowd into Macy's and you're online and I'm sure there's impulse buys online. Like Macy's, isn't dumb. They haven't been doing this for a thousand years,

[00:21:30] Trey Gerrald: but to your point here, Marianne begins this review with five sentences and the sixth sentences. Oop, I can't forget to mention Santa. And then it's two paragraphs about their personal experience from 70 years.

[00:21:45] Chelsey Donn: Do we think that Macy's keeps the tradition exactly the same? Like do you think that Marianne having this memory is, you know, an indication that a kid today might have a similar experience?

[00:22:00] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So I am not sure, but I do think that the value that comes from this hilarious, like Review that seems pretty empty is the fact that it was one moment in this human's life. Okay, who is in their possible seventies? That is so vivid that they did take the time to go back and write a review because it is that much of a milestone moment in their life.

[00:22:26] Chelsey Donn: That's what I'm saying. I, I take, you know, writing classes sometimes. And in one of my writing classes, one of the things we do is we, we sort of archive things that happened at every age of our life. Like we take, you know, 20 minutes and zero to five, five to 10, et cetera. And you're sometimes amazed by like, wow, this trip to Macy's where I had this exchange about the peas and the. It's that was a memory that I didn't realize I have. And sometimes you then end up taking that and putting it into the film, right. Because it was like, did you eat your peas? And then it's this whole narrative about how you did it, but you lie, but your parents got it anyway. And that was like this like high, high moment. That was like the top before you took the rollercoaster way, way, way down. So I think that there's story here, there's imagery. And it's very interesting. I just wonder if, Marianne. Almost does this exercise. And then every time one of her memories is associated with something, she plucks it out and uses it as an excuse to take that entire day to just write back to back to back reviews.

[00:23:30] Trey Gerrald: You know, we will never know.

[00:23:32] Chelsey Donn: Do you think that if we submitted this on Marianne's behalf to a short story contest. It's possible. She would place.

[00:23:41] Trey Gerrald: I think that you could turn this into a lifetime movie. No question. I think so. That's going to be a hallmark movie.

[00:23:48] Chelsey Donn: Do you think we should option this review? Trey? Should we, should we get the iP?

[00:23:53] Trey Gerrald: I'm not that interested, but I think someone should. Here's a look, another shark take. I hear you GO!

[00:24:00] Chelsey Donn: look at that. Okay. And I'm assuming that the spelling grammar was great..

[00:24:05] Trey Gerrald: I mean, it may be, you are right here. Yes. Marianne really took a long time to craft it. the plosives and the, yeah, very like

[00:24:15] Chelsey Donn: the descriptive language. And it, you know, I really do like to know the personal, I really do like to know this person's life, their story, their relationship to whatever it is that they are reviewing because. For me in a world where there's so many bots, first of all, the specificity is delicious just as like someone who, who likes to read that kind of stuff. And also, it really makes me believe that this is a truthful experience and it's a unique experience that only exists in this person's memory.

[00:24:52] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So is this, a common experience, I can expect our was this a fluke. I mean, it was 70 years.

[00:25:00] Chelsey Donn: Well, that's why it's hard to say. That's why I'm wondering, like, I hate to say it. Cause again, thank you Marianne, for all the details that you gave us, but no, I don't really think that we can expect this to be a typical analysis because it's not present day.

[00:25:16] Trey Gerrald: I would imagine. And today's culture is probably not allowed to ask if you've eaten your peas. I think they can probably ask if you've been good or bad, but I think you probably cause what if someone has a P allergy and then that's like a whole issue? Or like, what if someone has something, you know, it's like, I feel like they probably can't ask specifics like that.

[00:25:35] Chelsey Donn: Sometimes I hate like, no, it's fine.

[00:25:37] Trey Gerrald: Do you know what a Susie Walker at all is?

[00:25:40] Chelsey Donn: No. Like maybe like our parents would.

[00:25:43] Trey Gerrald: Also, she, uh, Marianne capitalizes Christmas morning. Both times that they say it.

[00:25:49] Chelsey Donn: What do you think Marianne's job was? Or is?

[00:25:52] Trey Gerrald: Bird's eye and does microwaveable peas.

[00:25:55] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. I think you're so right.

[00:25:57] Trey Gerrald: Um, so was there humor in this? I mean, it was funny that they like got, so like to your point, like a little bit of like personal storytelling is really impactful when it's balanced with information. I don't think that there's any information here other than here's my five-star review. From 70 years ago and it is burned and to my body as a positive experience. And that's pretty good.

[00:26:25] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. And if we're going by like brass tacks though, of I'm going to Yelp, because I want to know like, should I do this? Shouldn't I do this. If we're being honest, there's really no information here that would help me make that decision. I would have to do a lot more -

[00:26:40] Trey Gerrald: deeper digging.

[00:26:41] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. You know, in order to figure it out. Do we think we're ready to crown?

[00:26:46] Trey Gerrald: I think I'm ready to crown Marianne. All right. Let's. All right. So Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards and an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another. We will simultaneously reveal our ratings

[00:27:01] VOICEOVER: The Queens are tabulating.

[00:27:04] Trey Gerrald: You ready?

[00:27:05] Chelsey Donn: I'm ready.

[00:27:10] VOICEOVER: Total score

[00:27:11] Chelsey Donn: Okay, I'm holding up two crowns. Trey is holding up two and a half crowns. I'll go first. I gave Marianne two crowns cause I, I liked her passion and I liked that she had something to share with us today. I liked getting to know about her personal life and I liked getting to know that, you know, it's possible to have. Profound memory, uh, from going to Macy's Santaland. But that was really all I could give Marianne. I had to take all of the rest of the crowns away because there wasn't a lot of information there that I found particularly useful, to the reader. So that was why I gave Mariannee two crowns. Try. Why did you give Marianne two and a half?

[00:27:49] Trey Gerrald: So I did two and a half because it's a little less than middle of the road to me. I do find this to be an, an empty room. Other than what we've like, literally beaten over the head is like, okay, this must have been a profound moment. Right. But you know, if you haven't been here and over 50 years or 70 years, Should you write a review and hold, I mean, who knows different conversation, but I appreciated that Marianne shared that, you know, their life took a dismal turn after this wonderful experience as a child, but, um, they didn't upload the images like they teased at the end of the Review!, but they did have a really great spelling. So, you know, for that reason I did two and a half, not exactly middle of the road. Uh, I mean, there was some substance, but really lacking. So that was why I did two and a half.

[00:28:41] Chelsey Donn: Great.

[00:28:42] Trey Gerrald: All right.

[00:28:42] Chelsey Donn: I think that, it's funny to me that you think middle of the road is Three, because to me, middle of the road is two and a half.

[00:28:51] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I, well, I guess it is now that we have these. half card.

[00:28:54] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:28:54] Trey Gerrald: Right. Good. Good.

[00:28:56] Chelsey Donn: So you gave it a full middle of the road.

[00:28:58] Trey Gerrald: All right. So let's take a quick break. And when we come back, we're going to hear Chelsey's a one star review of Macy santaland. And boy, I can't wait to hear that.

[00:29:10] Chelsey Donn: I love it BRB

[00:29:15] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown. We'll be right back.

[00:29:28] SuperChewer OFFER

[00:29:28] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey and I are so excited to share this exclusive Review Queen offer from super Now from the makers of BarkBox super chewer as a monthly subscription-based service for those dogs that need tougher and more durable toys every month, you and your Papa will receive a box right to your front door.

[00:29:48] Trey Gerrald: That is loaded with two tough toys to meet. And two full sized bags of treats that are customizable for allergy and diet preferences. Super chewer is offering listeners of Review That Review one extra month free when you use our link. Super Sign up right now at super

[00:30:22] Chelsey Donn: I don't know if you guys remember when I had the bandaid on my finger, because Goldie had bitten me so bad that I was actually drawing blood from her biting and with the BarkBox super chewer situation. Thank God. She has something else to chew on, besides my fingers, as I'm going gonna say.

[00:30:39] Trey Gerrald: So did you get a subscription?

[00:30:41] Chelsey Donn: I have my sister sign me up for a subscription, which is very kind of her. I mean, it's been extremely helpful just saying.

[00:30:49] Trey Gerrald: Let's come back.

[00:31:05] Meryl-Go-Round

[00:31:05] Trey Gerrald: That's my Christmas bell, but it's not our Christmas episode. That's next week. Anyway, Chelsey, it's time for us to take a non Christmas episode, little spin on the Meryl-Go-Round

[00:31:17] Chelsey Donn: it's game time.

[00:31:19] VOICEOVER: I feel like an icon most of the day is I feel like 'I can't!' that's with an,. A'..

[00:31:28] Chelsey Donn: Here's the deal. Trey and I have each picked a rotten scathing, pithy One-Star-Zinger and with 30 seconds on the clock, we'll take turns, trying to recite the zinger in as many genres as possible.

[00:31:40] Trey Gerrald: Just like queen Meryl Streep, who does it all.

[00:31:42] Chelsey Donn: Before the clock runs out.

[00:31:44] Trey Gerrald: Alright Chels. Whatcha got?

[00:31:45] Chelsey Donn: You guys know, I love bringing in unique products that I didn't even know existed. So right now I'm going to read you guys a one-star review for Swiss Miss Lucky Charms hot chocolate, which as presented on the box is essentially a Swiss, miss hot chocolate packet that instead of the marshmallows, it's actually the marshmallows from lucky charms. Just saying. So- magically delicious they're magically. I don't know if I'm like gross out or intrigued. It's like somewhere between the tail, but I do know what contact1320 thought. Contact 1320 gave Swiss miss lucky charms mix one star. Their title of their review is no. Coco hot cocoa mix and the Review! is no hot cocoa mix at all. Only marshmallows with no punctuation.

[00:32:47] Trey Gerrald: All right. So today Chelsey, I'm going to strap you in on David Sedaris' one person show the Santaland Diaries. God probably being done somewhere at a community theater near you.

[00:33:02] Trey Gerrald: I love that. Thanks. I am ready. Here we go.

[00:33:09] VOICEOVER: TLC reality show,

[00:33:11] VOICEOVER: no hot cocoa mix at all.

[00:33:13] VOICEOVER: Only marshmallows filling. No hot cocoa mix at all. Holy marshmallows

[00:33:21] VOICEOVER: televangelist, no

[00:33:23] VOICEOVER: hot cocoa mix at all.

[00:33:27] VOICEOVER: Auctioneer

[00:33:30] VOICEOVER: only marshmallows, no hot cocoa mix. It all only marshmallows.

[00:33:41] VOICEOVER: That's all.

[00:33:42] Chelsey Donn: I was imagining that I was like a barista on my TLC reality

[00:33:47] Trey Gerrald: Oh for Bartender day!.

[00:33:49] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, exactly. For national bartender day.

[00:33:51] Trey Gerrald: So you got 'em five. Good job.

[00:33:54] Chelsey Donn: Thank you. I've really been, trying to be more specific about my performance. Okay. Try tell us where your One-Star-Zinger is from today.

[00:34:04] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So I have a one star review from show first new site, Goldstar. I don't know what it is. Um, so this is a one-star review for the radio city music hall, Christmas spectacular staring the rockettes. This was a Review! was written by Maria A'. panto. Ha Burgas. Okay, so this is written by Maria B

[00:34:33] Trey Gerrald: APAD, togas, Fergus. I don't know if A'. is the middle name or I thought Pinto ha better goals.

[00:34:41] Chelsey Donn: Oh, so Marie, okay.

[00:34:43] Trey Gerrald: P okay. This is from Maria. This is Maria is one star zinger. We had greats. Thanks. Loved and enjoyed the,

[00:35:01] Chelsey Donn: so why is it one star?

[00:35:06] Trey Gerrald: Wait. I didn't even finish.

[00:35:08] Chelsey Donn: Oh God.

[00:35:11] Trey Gerrald: we had greats. Thanks. Loved and enjoyed the show. My family. And it's a one-star review

[00:35:19] Chelsey Donn: and it's one star. All right. So there's a little bit of a confusion for Maria PEI. Maybe in Maria. He is mined one means five. Like number one.

[00:35:31] Trey Gerrald: I don't know, but Maria has left four other reviews on gold star, so.

[00:35:34] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay. All right. Well, good to know.

[00:35:37] Trey Gerrald: So what am I strapped in on?

[00:35:38] Chelsey Donn: You're strapped into a sled? Try. So get yourself ready. Cause a sled is the thing I was like very terrified of as a child, like does not seem safe, but strap yourself in however you stop yourself into a sled.

[00:35:48] Trey Gerrald: Okay. I'm ready.

[00:35:49] Chelsey Donn: Let's do this.

[00:35:54] VOICEOVER: Courtroom drama. We had greats. Thanks, loved and enjoyed the show. My family, adult

[00:36:00] VOICEOVER: film,

[00:36:01] VOICEOVER: we had

[00:36:02] VOICEOVER: grades loved and enjoyed the show like

[00:36:09] VOICEOVER: pop star.

[00:36:14] VOICEOVER: Family

[00:36:17] VOICEOVER: Shakespeare. We had great saints loved and enjoyed the show. My family

[00:36:22] Chelsey Donn: No Trey. We might've that's four what did I get?

[00:36:31] Trey Gerrald: You got five.

[00:36:32] Chelsey Donn: Oh I won! It's a Christmas miracle... on 34th street.

[00:36:38] Trey Gerrald: I'm so proud of you see your streak, your back, your you're a winner.

[00:36:42] Chelsey Donn: And I really tried to commit to the performance. I hope it came across.

[00:36:48] Santaland 1 Star Review

[00:36:48] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:36:52] Trey Gerrald: All right. We are back from that game break. And now it is Chelsey's turn.

[00:36:57] Chelsey Donn: It is my turn. Let's do it. I have a one-star review of Macy's Santaland. It is also from Yelp. Uh, it is written by Tara C, Tara C is not an elite reviewer, but Tara, he did include a photograph of, I assume her daughter on the lap of, of Santa. Um, this Review! was written. A little over two years ago.

[00:37:22] Chelsey Donn: Okay. And this is Tara C!

[00:37:26] Chelsey Donn: Warning! This experience will ruin Christmas. This is the first Review I've ever written on Yelp because I feel compelled to spare some other unknowing guests, this awful experience. Beside the fact that although having a reservation on a Tuesday mid day, my family, eight year old and four year old, still waited two hours. I know, I know it's Christmas time in New York city. I expected to wait, but not in a tiny red hallway, getting jammed in by elves and probably contracting God knows what for two hours. Had I known at the beginning, how long it would take, we would have left, but carry on we did.

[00:38:13] Chelsey Donn: Santaland once you actually get in is a joke. Everything seems old and just gross. I didn't want my kids touching anything. I'm attaching a photo of the Santa. We finally did see, go ahead and zoom in. I need to write no more on that. Seriously Macy's? This was the best Santa you could get? Had my children not had a really incredible experience elsewhere, this Macy's Santa would have ruined Christmas for my children. I'd never get them to believe after this.

[00:38:51] Chelsey Donn: My eight year old gasped when she saw Santa and said, "Oh my God! This is the fakest Santa I've ever seen!" My four-year-old wondered why kids were going into different rooms with different Santas. So unless you want to ruin the Christmas magic for your children, do not come here.

[00:39:19] Chelsey Donn: I mean, we got to zoom in on this photo, which I like... it's definitely a fake beard. Okay. And like I said before, ordinarily, like it was quite an honor to be the Macy's Santa, you know, like I know a few Santas personal. Um, or relatives of Santa, I guess. I don't know. I know a few people that dress as Santa and they all have real beards.

[00:39:44] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I would think that you would have that, that would be a prereq requisite,

[00:39:48] Chelsey Donn: but yeah this Santa is definitely, does not have a real beard. Can't really get a good gauge on the age of this Santa, but the Santa has a fake beard, a fake mustache. Fake eyebrows, fake white curly hair coming out of the hat that being said, and I don't know that like this, this does much, the costume is excellent. Right? No?

[00:40:14] Trey Gerrald: Here I'm going to share so that Patreon can see, yeah, it's a nice costume. It feels a little Nordic to me.

[00:40:20] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I mean, I think it's a decent Santa wardrobe.

[00:40:23] Trey Gerrald: It seems to me that this, this man is probably in his forties.

[00:40:27] Chelsey Donn: Right. I agreed.

[00:40:28] Trey Gerrald: I'm just really tripped up by these eyebrows.

[00:40:32] Chelsey Donn: The eyebrows are pretty bad. Whoever, whoever did the eyebrow wig job. Yeah. I mean, the thing that was most disturbing to me about this Review! I guess I will say not yes, disturbing, but also impactful was the, the idea that there are multiple rooms with multiple Santas?

[00:40:50] Trey Gerrald: Right. Because they get well, but they get, I mean, you would think that they would be able to disguise that in a way that a four year old isn't going to figure that.

[00:40:58] Chelsey Donn: Right. Do you think they just got the raw end of the deal here? And that's why they're in this like cramped hallway, because that's how they differentiate who's going to see the different Santas. Like they there's different waiting area line areas and they just got pushed to the corner.

[00:41:14] Trey Gerrald: I literally, I have no idea how it works, but I do know that they have different. They have a selection of different kinds of Santas. One can get, you can make a special request for that.

[00:41:25] Chelsey Donn: Oh really? I didn't know that.

[00:41:27] Trey Gerrald: but I don't know how it works out. That's like listed in the FAQ on the website was the only reason I have that, but I would be surprised if that was my Santa. Cause it seems pretty rough.

[00:41:39] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, it's definitely not what I would imagine. The caliber of the, you know, Macy's Santa would be like, I, I was very surprised.

[00:41:50] Trey Gerrald: Well, okay. So I do think that this is pretty valuable. I, I kind of side with Tara on this. I have a couple of thoughts here though. Like if, if you're a little precocious, eight year old is gasping. Oh my gosh, this is the fakest I've ever seen. I think, I think. Daughter needs to get coal and her stocking something about that as a little too precarious, chill out

[00:42:10] Chelsey Donn: a little too precocious,

[00:42:12] Trey Gerrald: but I also get like if the eight year old doesn't even believe that. Then maybe you're failing at the whole point of Santaland.

[00:42:19] Chelsey Donn: Right?

[00:42:20] Trey Gerrald: The whole thing about it. It does also make me start thinking about what it would be like to be hired at Santa there's so much pressure, like could literally ruin it at like, say one wrong thing.

[00:42:31] Chelsey Donn: But I think that when you're, but that's the, that's the responsibility you take. I mean, every job that you have comes with some sort of,

[00:42:39] Trey Gerrald: it is funny to me that at the beginning Tara says, we were jammed in by Elves. That sounds like a really funny album.

[00:42:46] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Also, yeah. Also very cinematic, you know, like I felt like I could see. In Elf... Was that supposed to be Macy's too?

[00:42:57] Trey Gerrald: I'm positive. And Christmas story is like a fake version of it.

[00:43:02] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

[00:43:03] Trey Gerrald: What's the spelling like here?

[00:43:05] Chelsey Donn: I think spelling and grammar is great. I didn't notice any complaints we did when I was obviously exaggerating. We did use some caps throughout, um, some exclamation points, but not really like offensive, you know, we've had reviews before where the whole thing is written in caps. It was just like a little bit sprinkled in, which is fine with me, really solid on the spelling and grammar from.

[00:43:25] Trey Gerrald: Do you think Tara's being truthful or shady?

[00:43:27] Trey Gerrald: I think

[00:43:28] Chelsey Donn: Tara is being truthful. I would believe that maybe the whole Macy's experience has lost its luster. That's why with the first Review! I think there's something very like nostolgic, and pure about Macy's in the 1950s. And I think today dealing with the masses of people. The population alone has gone up tremendously since then. So, you know, dealing with the crowds and everything that you have to account for today, I do believe this is a more truthful representation of an experience in the modern era.

[00:44:03] Trey Gerrald: I believe that the children didn't buy it. And I believe Tara, when Tara shares that the four year old noticed and said, why are there multiple houses of Santas? But I. It feels a little shady. Like if that is the issue, like Tara was already done. By the fact that they still had to wait after making a reservation, which

[00:44:26] Chelsey Donn: well I've been upset. Like, what do we want to say about that? Because like, I think waiting a half hour after a reservation is okay, but I think waiting two hours is extreme and at vary least. I don't know, like, I don't know how hectic and crazy it gets there, but in my mind, I would think if we're running that behind, we just, we got to push it back and say like, come back in a couple hours. Sorry. At very least like we're having people that have reservations waiting online for two hours.

[00:44:55] Trey Gerrald: There is a question there, but then about everything looking old, like everything has taken down. And then put back up, so like, sure. Here's a question. Is it the same stuff from 1950?

[00:45:06] Chelsey Donn: Well, that's what I'm saying. I think it might be, even if it is taken down and placed back into place for the next season, there still should be a little reno now.

[00:45:16] Trey Gerrald: I mean, I don't know, I don't work for Macy's, but I'm sure that it's. I'm sure they have their like nostalgic evergreen pieces that return every year. But I would imagine it continues to change. Like I'm sure that I'm sure that's not the Santa Claus seat, but I don't know maybe.

[00:45:31] Chelsey Donn: So this is what I'm hearing from you. And I think I'm agreeing what I'm hearing for you is this might be a common experience in terms of waiting online, et cetera, where we're questioning things. Is Is this a family that needs. To be top of the line. Everything has to be pristine and perfect. And if it's not, then it's terrible. Like there's no gray area for Tara C and fam you know, with the fake is sand I've ever seen. Like that kind of stuff. Is that where you're struggling?

[00:46:04] Trey Gerrald: I guess I just sort of feel like Santa himself was a disappointment. And then in writing the review, I feel like Tara was just. Undone with everything. Sure. Children are the most germy things that exist in the world. Right. So saying I don't want my kids to touch anything and you're inside of a Macy's is a little like, okay. I think Tara is protesting too much because Tara was really disappointed. That being said, if I'm taking my children to this make-believe character under the guise, that we're all pretending it's real, then you need to help execute that. I mean, point blank.

[00:46:38] Chelsey Donn: Well, that's the thing is I feel like Tara C brought up a lot of concerns that I would want to know if I was going to bring my kids to, you know, Santaland. but I, I hear universal a lot of, like, there was a lot of knocking on things which tends to happen when we have a bad experience. Right? Correct. So we do have to consider that it's. As gross or as fake or as whatever

[00:47:02] Trey Gerrald: maybe it is, or maybe it is. But I do think the big value is that you're probably going to be waiting.

[00:47:09] Chelsey Donn: I know, I wonder what I would do to adjust accordingly if I knew that maybe pack snacks.

[00:47:13] Trey Gerrald: I think I, I think I can crown this. How do you feel?

[00:47:16] Chelsey Donn: I feel a bit conflicted, but um, I'm going to crown it.

[00:47:20] Trey Gerrald: All right. Let's do it.

[00:47:21] Chelsey Donn: Let's do it.

[00:47:23] VOICEOVER: The queens are tabulating!

[00:47:26] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I'm conflicted too, but okay. I think I'm ready or you

[00:47:29] Chelsey Donn: see I'm conflicted, but yeah,

[00:47:36] VOICEOVER: Total Score!

[00:47:38] Chelsey Donn: Great. Trey and I are anonymous. We both gave three and a half. I was between three and a half and four. I don't know if you were between three and three and a half. Why don't you go first?

[00:47:46] Trey Gerrald: I don't know. I just said three and a half because I don't think that I would read this review and make my decision. Same with the five-star review from before I need more context here. I would want to, this is once again, just army me with information about like, I need to make sure that my children are distracted and they don't notice there's multiple little houses or huts with Santas. And I need to like brace myself, like I'm going to Disney world and it's going to be a long day of waiting. Or agreed. And I would imagine that the kids are going to want to touch everything. So I want to like, see if it's dirty and gross because everything's glittery and shiny and sparkly. So like, to me, I don't really know how I land, so I gave a half more than middle of the road. Uh, so that's why I did three and a half. I don't know. Why did you do.

[00:48:40] Chelsey Donn: I did three and a half. Cause I did feel like Tara C. did provided me with a lot of information that I'm going to be chewing on before I made this decision, it would implore me to do a little more research, which for me is not necessarily a bad thing. Just like are other people having this experience to other people think it's gross to other people think, you know, the Santas are really unrealistic. These are things that Tara has. Piqued my interest in, and for that, I think it's a good review. There was like, there were no spelling or grammar issues. It was very easy to read. I took away one and a half crowns because I wasn't sure if Tara C and family was a little pretentious and if their expectations would be higher than the average consumer. So that was where they lost the one and a half crown for me. But I did think it was a useful Review! so three and a half.

[00:49:31] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I hear ya. Well, I mean, I've never been to Santaland, I'm assuming you haven't either.

[00:49:36] Chelsey Donn: Well, don't assume I've never sat on Santa slap because I have really have sat on, I have, my family was never the kind of family that was like, you're not allowed to believe in Santa or like have that experience as a kid because it's very Americanized, you know, it's, it's sort of a.

[00:49:55] Chelsey Donn: Oh my Goodness.

[00:49:56] Trey Gerrald: Have you ever seen this picture?

[00:49:57] Chelsey Donn: No, I have not. That is so there's a picture of Trey. Patreon is seeing a picture of Trey getting spanked by Santa. A good Santa. I might add real beard and David is looking like, what? Get off my man or what you're spanking my man, or what's happening here. It's really, really cute. You guys.

[00:50:18] Trey Gerrald: I'll share the story behind that on our Patreon.

[00:50:21] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. My dad had a patient that was a firefighter and also Santa Claus. So a couple of times he drove by our house in the firetruck as Santa and I sat in his lap. So my parents were not anti Santa by any means, even though we're jewish. So.

[00:50:39] Trey Gerrald: You Just reminded me of, we used to have Santa drive through our neighborhood and their candy cans on the fire truck. Forgot about it. Yeah. All right. Well, I don't think that the five-star that I shared with for the episode today gives us any sort of real power to compare. Uh, but I would love to share the other one I found in our after-show podcast.

[00:50:59] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I can't wait to hear it,

[00:51:00] Trey Gerrald: but, um, I, you know, I think I would be charmed by Macy's. Santaland and consider going, but it just isn't something I would be interested to be honest. And it does, I really wouldn't dissipate it just being a mop scene. I mean, it's like Harold square. It's always a mob scene. So like,

[00:51:16] Chelsey Donn: like, I feel like there is a similarity here to all the reviews that we do have times square when it's like, if I'm going to be taking on this endeavor, I better expect that it's going to be a little bit of mayhem. Yeah. Or a lot of it.

[00:51:28] My Royal Highness

[00:51:28] Trey Gerrald: All right. My queen. So we have reached the most Regal portion of the show. Chelsey. Yes. Who are you in ducting today? For

[00:51:39] VOICEOVER: My Royal Highness.

[00:51:41] Chelsey Donn: I'm going to induct today. Cheese. Let's talk about it. I just love cheese. I've been trying to take account of my diet lately. Not because I'm like restricted myself, but just because I'm trying to write things down, the amount of cheese that I consume. It's a lot. Okay. All kinds of cheese. Um, mostly like I love a Parmesan. She is a Sahrawi. Like it has like a wine Rhine going on. It's delicious cheeses. It's just so good. It makes you feel better. There is like dopamine or something. I want to say in cheese, there's actually been research. That's been done to show that cheese makes you feel better. And I just love cheese. I mean, it's kind of like your love of fries. Like if there's an option on a sandwich or something or a burger to add cheese. Yes, please. I will always exercise my right. If I'm traveling somewhere with a vegan and we're splitting food. We're not going to just say no cheese. We're going to get the cheese on the side. You know what I mean? cheese will be included in most of my meals and for that. And because we spend so much quality time together, me and she is, I just thought it was long over jail that I inducted cheese. As My Royal Highness.

[00:53:03] Trey Gerrald: I hear you. I love cheese as well. I really do good one.

[00:53:08] Chelsey Donn: That's that? All right. Try. Who are you inducting for your Royal Highness today?

[00:53:11] Trey Gerrald: All right, so this actually was a recommendation, from my brother-in-law on our trip and I'm sort of mortified. That we haven't done this yet. Oh, now. Okay. So get ready to scratch it off your last you're out of here. I know I'm sure it's probably on that today. I'm going to induct from My Royal Highness, DoorDash, Postmates, Uber eats. Seamless. Grub hub, all caviar delivery, all of these delivery services, Postmates, this is pretty much a league of its own because you can like order from like the seven 11. Right, right, right. But this is like such a profound invention for me. So true. I remember when David and I lived on 23rd street and the ground floor was a Moonstruck diner and I would, I would order it. From underneath us, instead of getting in the elevator and going, I would, I would do a constantly, which is just crazy, but I just I'm inducting these food delivery services, because I do think that that is the height of American excellence. I don't know if an American invented that. It just seems so lazy. Just like delivery of food. I mean, it's like so genius and I have totally. The utilize that I've used it when I've not felt well, or I felt like go out, you know, just not having to cook in the kitchen and just having it brought to your door. Do you remember being a kid and ordering pizza? I mean, it was like the most fun, like special events. I just have to do it.

[00:54:47] Chelsey Donn: Or Even like, sometimes like I'll order it before I get home and then almost like meet the. It's beautiful.

[00:54:52] Trey Gerrald: I love delivering I've even figured out how to do it in Key West, which is a tiny little island.

[00:54:57] Chelsey Donn: Oh wow.

[00:54:57] Trey Gerrald: There's a couple of services there. So therefore I did it. I'm inducting all of these food delivery service app. Uh, from My Royal Highness,

[00:55:10] Chelsey Donn: what a good, and I can't even believe it. Wasn't on my list.

[00:55:15] Trey Gerrald: It wasn't on mine either. So that's something I'm really grateful for. Good point.

[00:55:20] Royal Review

[00:55:20] Trey Gerrald: Um, Chelsey, do we have time for a Royal Review!?

[00:55:22] Chelsey Donn: I think we can make time. Trey,

[00:55:27] VOICEOVER: Baby it's time for some Royal Reviews!

[00:55:32] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Very exciting. Chelsey today's Royal Review! is from FiestaMaiden on apple podcasts. Okay. Fiesta, maiden writes, five stars, amazing show. I hate to brag, but I found this podcast before they even released any episodes. The idea alone hooked me. This is a true genius podcast idea. And it's led by two individuals who really know how to put on a show! With an original premise and fun presentation. This show is going to go far!

[00:56:12] Chelsey Donn: From your lips to God's... what do they say?

[00:56:14] Trey Gerrald: Ahhh! Kenohorah!

[00:56:17] Chelsey Donn: Thank you. Thank you so much FiestaMaiden. And that is so, so sweet.

[00:56:22] Trey Gerrald: I love that found us before we had officially launched and they waited to leave us a five-star review until November true listener fans.

[00:56:31] Chelsey Donn: You took the words right out of my mouth. I mean like really? I'm so glad that you were hooked on the premise and then you're, you're listening and you're loving it. Yeah. That's just incredible. And you're a queen FiestaMaiden.

[00:56:43] Trey Gerrald: I love the name, FiestaMaiden.

[00:56:46] Chelsey Donn: Me too.

[00:56:47] Trey Gerrald: We have great listeners that use their creativity bones to make fun usernames.

[00:56:54] Chelsey Donn: Agreed. We have the best.

[00:56:57] Trey Gerrald: HammondCheeseSandWitch someone's coming for you! FiestaMaiden,

[00:57:00] Chelsey Donn: FiestaMaiden! Can you imagine we should have FiestaMaiden and HammonCheese, like do a Meryl-Go-Round or something.

[00:57:07] Trey Gerrald: All right. Well, so that's it. Here we go. It's episode 28, everyone. Next week, everyone is our special Christmas episode. So you have that to look forward to, but as of right now, that's it, we did it. That is another entry, closer to sleuthing out. Life's ultimate truth. Wisdom seeking love. Yeah. Ferris wheel of life.

[00:57:31] Chelsey Donn: Okay. That's amazing. Thank you guys so much. You Queens for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please? I've said it a million times. I keep saying it, but it really is the best way. The best nicest thing you could do for us would be for you to share this with your community and friends, um, over the hump. I have a little conversation about this.

[00:57:51] Trey Gerrald: And if you don't like what you heard, just tell an enemy, please join our mailing list so that you can stay up to date with the goings on, in the queendom at Review That Review dot com scroll all the way to the bottom. You'll see it. Or you can just click on that symbol, like that's in our show notes.

[00:58:08] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. And don't forget. We want to hear from you hit up our voicemail box 1-850-REVIEW-0. You can also follow us on all the socials @theReviewQueens. I'm @ChelseyBD

[00:58:22] Trey Gerrald: and I'm @TreyGerrald. Become a member of our Royal Court. When you join our Patreon at

[00:58:32] Chelsey Donn: and remember, ignore the haters. You're a queen!

[00:58:37] Trey Gerrald: Gender non-specific queen!

[00:58:39] Chelsey Donn: Bye!

[00:58:40] Trey Gerrald: Bye. Make sure you join our after show podcast so you can hear the other Review!.

[00:58:45] Chelsey Donn: Yeah and if you're on Patreon, Stay in your seats. Cause we got more.

[00:58:48] Trey Gerrald: Bye

[00:58:49] Chelsey Donn: Bye!

Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.



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