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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 32 : "Ski Resort - 1 vs 5 Star Reviews"



Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 32 : " Ski Resort - 1 vs 5 Star Reviews"

Transcription


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!


THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:30] CHELSEY DONN: Hello!

[00:00:32] TREY GERRALD: Hello. Welcome to Review That Review the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:39] CHELSEY DONN: Reviews! We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scaping and sometimes suspicious online.

[00:00:50] TREY GERRALD: That's Chelsey Donn

[00:00:52] CHELSEY DONN: and that's Trey Gerrald

[00:00:55] TREY GERRALD: and together we are

[00:00:57] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens.

[00:01:01] TREY GERRALD: And if you want to support the show while getting bonus and exclusive content, including a members only after show podcast. Oh, I ran out of breath on that sentence, visit our Patreon Page at patreon.com / ReviewThatReview. Hey Chelsey girl, how has your week been going?

[00:01:19] CHELSEY DONN: My week's been going pretty well. You know, things have an amping up this week. I had been meaning to catch up on Curb Your Enthusiasm, which I hadn't done. I've been enjoying that very much. I I'm doing good this week. How about you, Trey? How are you doing?

[00:01:34] TREY GERRALD: It's funny. You're talking about, I mean, I know that this is a re launch of, uh, Curb Your Enthusiasm is live now, but I just started this week watching an old show that has not relaunched. Cause it just ended. I just, for the first time in my life, I started watching Veep.

[00:01:48] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, I haven't watched Veep either. Maybe I should get on the Veep train.

[00:01:52] TREY GERRALD: It's very funny. I'm on episode four, like obviously it's very funny. The world knows that, but I've been introducing a little bit of television back into my life that is been going great and fun. And. We're here and I'm excited for today's episode because we're going to be covering a place. I've always yearned to go in my life, but I've never been.

[00:02:14] CHELSEY DONN: Yes! I'm so excited as well. And also, I just have to comment. I mean, not everybody is watching, but Trey, What a gorgeous hat you have. Can you describe it?

[00:02:24] TREY GERRALD: Thank you. I did receive in the mail a gift with a note attached that said thank you for being such an awesome co-host and it's one of our merch items. This is a white baseball hat that says Kvetcher on it. I like to wear it when I'm running. I've I've been running once since I've had this hat, I really feel like when people see me, they laugh, they get a little chuckle.

[00:02:46] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah! I think it's so cute. I love it. I have my black Kvetcher hat. I'll put it on for the After Show.

[00:02:52] TREY GERRALD: Oh, that's fun. Okay.

[00:02:53] CHELSEY DONN: Great!

[00:02:54] Lodge A Complaint

[00:02:54] TREY GERRALD: Well, should we get into some bad things?

[00:02:58] CHELSEY DONN: I think maybe we should.

[00:02:59] TREY GERRALD: Okay Chelsey. I really need you to

[00:03:01] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint.

[00:03:02] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. Thanks. Trey. I want a Lodge, A Complaint today about like people who leave gum anywhere, like anywhere. That's not a trash can. Okay. Why are we doing this? I feel like the older I get the closer I become to like a schoolmarm because when I was in like elementary, middle high school, they were very strict about the no gum thing. You know, like if you got caught with gum, you would get detention. Like it was a big deal. And as a kid. Yeah. And as a kid, I was always like, oh, that's so stupid. Just let me chew my gum. This is ridiculous. Why can't I chew gum? It's so dumb. But the reality is people are animals, Trey.

[00:03:41] TREY GERRALD: Yeah.

[00:03:42] CHELSEY DONN: They just leave gum anywhere. Any old were right there in the middle of the sidewalk. Why not? Seems like a good place to spit out my gum. Someone might step in it, you know, like me I've stepped in gum before. It's horrible.

[00:03:54] TREY GERRALD: Have you ever like stuck gum somewhere?

[00:03:57] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I'm not just saying this so I come off as like some goody-goody, but I don't think I've ever put gum anywhere besides the trashcan.

[00:04:04] TREY GERRALD: I don't think I've either.

[00:04:05] CHELSEY DONN: In fact, I have this thing where I get like, I love gum, but then gum loses its flavor and it becomes near nauseatingly to me. Like I got to get, like, I can't think about anything until I get the gum out of my mouth. Like I gotta get the gum, but I won't, I won't, until I can find inappropriate receptacle. What is happening with this?

[00:04:27] TREY GERRALD: You also said the phrase marm.

[00:04:29] CHELSEY DONN: Schoolmarm I think...

[00:04:31] TREY GERRALD: yeah. Where does that come from? I've heard it, but what is a marm?

[00:04:35] CHELSEY DONN: I don't know. I just imagine it as like some like crotchety old lady who is like, you know, slapping everyone's wrist with a ruler or something. I don't know. It's, can't be a good word. It's probably not 2022 appropriate, but you know what? I respect all the schoolmarms. Okay. Don't come at me.

[00:04:57] TREY GERRALD: It is very frustrating. when you come across something that's sticky and stuck to something that isn't supposed to be there. So obviously gum being in places that's not in a receptacle.

[00:05:09] CHELSEY DONN: Tragic. I can't do it. What about you, Trey. Give us a complaint, lay it on us.

[00:05:13] TREY GERRALD: I want to Lodge A complaint against hangers getting caught amongst themselves. Oh my, have you ever encountered that -

[00:05:20] CHELSEY DONN: So many times the death of many hangers!

[00:05:23] TREY GERRALD: It's so frustrating. You like, there's so many things about hangers that are very frustrating. Like if you're trying to carry like 12 items on hangers, it like, well, it's like the most painful experience that a hand can ever have, and then you hang them on a rod and they're all caught up on each other. And then you, like, it's like trying to angle the hanger. It's like trying to untangle necklaces. Like you can't find the, start, you don't know how to fix it. Cause it's so frustrating. I just want to grab that article of clothing and it's like, suddenly I'm in a war in my closet and I don't like anything to do with being inside the closet at all.

[00:06:03] CHELSEY DONN: No, never, especially not like in a war. That sounds terrible.

[00:06:07] TREY GERRALD: So that's my complaint. Oy!

[00:06:09] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. All right. Well that felt good to get all of that off our chest. Don't you think?

[00:06:13] TREY GERRALD: I feel much lighter and I feel like with this levity, I am ready to go head-to-head!

[00:06:21] CHELSEY DONN: Does that mean that it is another versus an episode this week? Oh my God, we got to do it. Let's do it.

[00:06:30] TREY GERRALD: This is our first versus episode of 2022!

[00:06:35] CHELSEY DONN: 2022. Trey lets

[00:06:38] VOICEOVER: Assess That Kvetch!

[00:06:40] TREY GERRALD: Yes. Today is another vs episode! Today, Chelsey and I are both going to cover a one-star and a five-star review on the same topic. Today's topic, a ski resort in Vail

[00:06:57] CHELSEY DONN: That's right for this versus episode, Trey selected the one-star and I selected the five star. So to determine who goes first, we got to flip that quarter, Trey. All right.

[00:07:08] TREY GERRALD: You want to call it?

[00:07:08] CHELSEY DONN: Heads.

[00:07:11] TREY GERRALD: It is heads!

[00:07:12] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, thank goodness. I hadn't been getting it right in a while. I started to doubt myself. Okay. So, I'm going first!

[00:07:18] TREY GERRALD: All right. So let me tell everyone about what our topic is today. We are covering a ski resort called Antlers At Vail.

[00:07:27] TREY GERRALD: Antlers At Vail is the number three out of 52 for specialty lodging in Vail on TripAdvisor and per Antler's website, lodging options include 86, fully equipped and spacious condominiums, including studio suites, 1, 2, 3, and four bedrooms And I thought this was very interesting. The studio units are approximately twice as large as a standard hotel room. And I looked at the images and they are like very luxe. They offer a pool and hot tubs, a hot tub in the snow. That would be gorgeous. Fitness centers, pet Friendly condos, slope side, ski valet, In room, dining, and family friendly amenities. And at the time of this recording, there are 965 reviews for Antlers At Vail on TripAdvisor with six hundred and seventy eight, five star reviews and ten one star reviews. So with all of that background info, let's get into this versus battle, Henny.

[00:08:35] CHELSEY DONN: Let's do it.

[00:08:38] 5 Star Review for Antlers At Vail

[00:08:38] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:08:42] CHELSEY DONN: All right. I did scour through a lot of those fives are used to try and find someone that was the most passionate. So, Trey, help me with this one. Okay. This person is from Sydney, Australia, and their username is W A I M A T E zero One.

[00:09:05] TREY GERRALD: Y mate?

[00:09:06] CHELSEY DONN: or is it like a way matie? I don't know. I don't. I dunno. I don't know. Are we saying in an Australian accent, this person's from sydney-

[00:09:14] TREY GERRALD: why matie! That's what you said, right?

[00:09:17] CHELSEY DONN: I think so.

[00:09:18] TREY GERRALD: So let's say why matie 0 1.

[00:09:20] CHELSEY DONN: Why matie 01

[00:09:22] TREY GERRALD: Right?. Like good day, Matie.

[00:09:24] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. That's why I was thinking that.

[00:09:26] TREY GERRALD: Alright! Let's be offensive. I love this.

[00:09:28] CHELSEY DONN: Way Oh! Way-Oh Matie 01, has written a five star review for Antlers. The subject is a really nice place to stay.

[00:09:41] CHELSEY DONN: When we choose ski accommodation, our requirements are two bedroom apartment as close to the lifts as possible. Like, ideally about as far from the lift, as you could throw a ski boot. Our scowering of the map suggested there's not a lot of suitable accommodations close to the lift's at Vail Village. It's mostly retail with the accommodation behind. This is one reason we opted for Lionshead and Antlers. Their website exuded a friendly vibe. As much as websites can exude vibes. Now, having been there, we can see, we assessed the proximity issue quite well. If you want to be close to a lift apartment style accommodation, then Lionshead is for you.

[00:10:30] CHELSEY DONN: We also correctly assessed the friendliness of Antlers correctly. Let me tell you about this. Once... once per week, they host a complimentary food and drink session to let customers mingle with each other and a couple of staff. Nice. Right? It's held in their meeting room. Whose name I don't recall, but it's named after someone.

[00:11:00] TREY GERRALD: [Laughter]

[00:11:04] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.

[00:11:05] TREY GERRALD: So Helpful!

[00:11:20] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Ooh. Oh God. Okay. But it's but it's named after someone

[00:11:33] CHELSEY DONN: Chelsey Meryl.

[00:11:37] CHELSEY DONN: I'm going to just skip that, but it's named, after someone cause we got it.

[00:11:39] TREY GERRALD: Got it yeah!

[00:11:41] CHELSEY DONN: Inside the room. There's a picture of a lady with some words under it.

[00:11:59] CHELSEY DONN: [laughter.] Are they going to tell us the words? ...NO?!

[00:12:17] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.

[00:12:18] CHELSEY DONN: Okay.

[00:12:20] CHELSEY DONN: Clearly it's who the room...

[00:12:27] CHELSEY DONN: Clearly. It's who the room is named after.

[00:12:29] TREY GERRALD: Yes.

[00:12:33] CHELSEY DONN: Are we clear?

[00:12:34] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, thank you, Why Matie.

[00:12:40] CHELSEY DONN: While chatting to one of the staff I asked who the lady is expecting to learn. It's the owner or founder or some such. Turns out it's a housekeeper. Who'd been with them for 37 years. They named their main meeting room after a long serving housekeeper. That's pretty fricking cool in my book. They have a number of 30 plus year staff, which suggests they've got to be doing something really right. I was super impressed. To the other stuff. The ski valet service is great and you should definitely use it. Antlers is a few minutes walk from the gondola. They don't have room service, but they do sell soups at reception and the soups are really good. The kitchen facilities are comprehensive. General store and liquor store are about as far as the gondola.

[00:13:38] CHELSEY DONN: The general store is quite limited, but Antlers will run you over to a nearby, full supermarket. Our apartment was a bit dated, kind of high eighties decor, but apparently it's due for a makeover. So maybe some of the others are a bit more modern. There are exposed walkways from the rooms to the elevator. So the moment you open your door, you're in the elements. No big deal. More just expectation management. there are many more dining options in the main village than lionshead and certainly a cooler vibe. So you'll definitely want to use the shuttle bus at least a couple of times while you're there, but you won't need or want to use the bus for skiing, although you could, if you really want it. Well done Antlers. We were very happy with our choice and would unreservedly recommend!

[00:14:36] TREY GERRALD: All right? way mate!

[00:14:38] CHELSEY DONN: Way... oh yeah. What is,what did we agree on?

[00:14:41] TREY GERRALD: Were we saying matie before? Pirate pirate, same matey.

[00:14:46] CHELSEY DONN: I don't know. You guys. What's your let's. Should we just call them WayMate?

[00:14:50] TREY GERRALD: WaiMate!

[00:14:50] CHELSEY DONN: 01. WaiMate01. Final! Final Decision!

[00:14:53] TREY GERRALD: I took so many notes on this one.

[00:14:55] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, great.

[00:14:56] TREY GERRALD: I just want to say as someone who was born in 86, I'm stealing the phrase high eighties,

[00:15:02] CHELSEY DONN: high eighties. I know. I love that.

[00:15:04] TREY GERRALD: Do you know when this Review! was written?

[00:15:05] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. This Review! was written in January of 2017.

[00:15:09] TREY GERRALD: Okay. I'm curious about that because I looked at the website last night and it says they have In room dining, but

[00:15:15] CHELSEY DONN: oh

[00:15:15] TREY GERRALD: waimate01 is saying no room service.

[00:15:18] CHELSEY DONN: So maybe they've made that change because it does seem like they were alluding to the fact that they were going to be making upgrades. So maybe that was one of the upgrades.

[00:15:25] TREY GERRALD: Right. And then I'm also stealing the phrase. Some such,

[00:15:30] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:15:31] TREY GERRALD: love it. Okay. Anyway, that housekeeper section, like almost massacred my face. All right. It's also interesting to me. I have never, once in my life been skiing, I have never put skis on, I don't know a thing. I don't know a thing about it, but it's funny to me, skiing in itself is an act of going long distances. And so it's very funny that when looking for recommendations, you don't want anything that's further than a snow boots throw. There's just something very ironic and hypocritical about that. But I recognize it's probably difficult to walk in the skis.

[00:16:09] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. And also like that is a big thing. Like there are all these fancy resorts that are like literally ski on resorts where it's almost like you can go to the bottom of the mountain and you're like in the lobby, like ready for Apres ski. You know what I mean?

[00:16:24] TREY GERRALD: That makes sense. What's Apres Ski?

[00:16:26] CHELSEY DONN: So Apres ski. I think it, I think Apres is after in French. I want to say it's after, but it's like a light bite after your skiing.

[00:16:36] TREY GERRALD: Oh, like a Capri the salad.

[00:16:39] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Yeah. Like a nosh, but like with ski vibes after you ski.

[00:16:46] TREY GERRALD: anyway. Okay. I actually I'm a little unsure how I feel about crowning of this, because well, okay. There is value here. I'm wondering if, if maybe this is interesting, I don't think we've ever discussed this. I wonder. if there have been updates, does that then mean that, that makes this Review! obsolete? Because I don't know if it's valuable or not about the room service, because they're saying there's in-room dining. So then also if it's been updated, then I'm wondering also this whole section about a mingle session. I recognize in theory, that is like, that's really nice. It's building community, it's building friends, you know, like I know like my in-laws like, they have friends that they met on cruises and like they're like long friends,

[00:17:35] CHELSEY DONN: And this is like, and skiing: very mingle vibes.

[00:17:38] TREY GERRALD: Okay. That sounds like a true nightmare to me. Let's like go down into the boardroom and like mingle and meet God that my anxiety is already like, registering that. Why does that literally bit upset? That's a premium,

[00:17:52] CHELSEY DONN: that's a pers- that's going to have to go on the bias category. I think for you when you go into crowning this Review! because I think that there's a lot of valuable information here. That's still relevant. What they're doing here. They're really flexing and like kind of a fun way, but it is funny that they're flexing so much like about how they scoured the map. So the information they're giving us is that it's close. We know, we know it's a boots throw away.

[00:18:17] TREY GERRALD: Yes, true.

[00:18:18] CHELSEY DONN: So that's like hugely helpful to know when you're looking for places to say, cause you want to know that like you want to be able to ski and then you're exhausted and you want to relax and have a little. Beverage and nosh and be done with your day. So I think it is good to have all of this information. And also the friendly vibe thing was something, again, we're just grading this Review!, but it was something that came up in a lot of the five-star reviews. Obviously vibe is very important to this hotel

[00:18:48] TREY GERRALD: also, I want to say how they mentioned, even the studios have kitchens, like really nice kitchens. So like knowing that the resort will drive you to the grocery store is awesome. So what is the spelling and grammar like

[00:19:04] CHELSEY DONN: It's really, really good. And I mean, I, I thought there was a lot of sentimentality. I love the story about the housekeeper, you know, like I just think it's so specific and makes me feel like this is truthful. Like this is their, their honest experience that they have that's

[00:19:20] TREY GERRALD: yes, it has that impact for me as well, that I feel like there's something to a company that's going to highlight a housekeeper. It sort of says something about the integrity of the structure of the organization that they are. Like I would imagine this is a great place to work and. You know, if you are honoring your housekeepers, then there's no hierarchy. We're all working together to create a great experience for the customers, which makes me feel like that's awesome. I do trust WaiMate01, about that for sure.

[00:19:51] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. I definitely trust them.

[00:19:53] TREY GERRALD: I mean, I'm wondering if I can distinguish, if this is common or a fluke from here, it seems like everything is factual. It's like you can, they're stating everything on the map they're stating. So to me it sort of feels like that's probably going to be very common. I mean, the distance is going to be the same.

[00:20:11] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I definitely think that the personality of WaiMate01 comes through in this, like they're anal retentive, before they went there, they did all this research.

[00:20:22] TREY GERRALD: Correct.

[00:20:22] CHELSEY DONN: I really think that they're intentional in their review.

[00:20:25] TREY GERRALD: Now I have a question about humor because do you think that way was intentionally being humorous in the setup about there's a room. I don't remember the name at same day after some One, though.

[00:20:39] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think to the degree that we were laughing at it. Certainly not. God, but I mean, I do think that they definitely have personality regardless. Like that's true. It's like a lot of the language that they used, I think was playful. I don't think that they were writing this as a standup bit, you know, but it was very funny,

[00:21:00] TREY GERRALD: something to the Review! like, what is the subject?

[00:21:03] CHELSEY DONN: Very simple, uh, a really nice place to stay.

[00:21:06] TREY GERRALD: Right? There's something that feels like, you know, when you learn a new language and you, I know that Australian speak English, but when you learn it, when you learn a new language, it's very like, matter of fact, it's not very flowery. There's something about the Review! that feels very much like this was nice. It was outside. I liked it. There was mingling. There was...

[00:21:27] CHELSEY DONN: Really? I completely disagree. I just, yeah, I think that there's like so much color and intrigue and like personality. I would be shocked if this was like a bot, you know?

[00:21:43] TREY GERRALD: Oh, no, certainly I can tell it's a human. It doesn't feel emotional to me. It feels like nothing is super emotional either way, which is neither good, nor bad.

[00:21:52] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I think that they are, cause they end with saying like, we were very happy with our choice and would unreservedly recommend. Like I do think there's an element of, and, and even, and I kind of cute way, like defending them, like, yeah, like, was it a little dated, like kind of, it was eighties, like I'm telling you this thing because I want you to manage your expectations, you know, like. Yeah, there's something that's very nice about that. And so I did feel like there was almost an element of protection coming from waymate, I don't know what the one star is going to say, but I'm curious now for sure.

[00:22:28] TREY GERRALD: Well, I think I could crown the way mate. How do you feel? Okay. So Chelsey and I each have our own set of one to five crown cards and in an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.

[00:22:44] VOICEOVER: The queens are tabulating...Total Score!

[00:22:51] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Trey's holding up four crowns. I'm holding up four and a half crowns. Trey tell us why you're holding up four crowns

[00:22:56] TREY GERRALD: I just took the one fully. Because of the date. That's really all. I think if I had read this four years ago, I would feel like maybe it would be more accurate, accurate. I think I'm just having a little hesitancy because if they now are publicizing, they have in room dining, then I'm wondering if there are other things that have been changed, because I feel like that's a huge change. I want way mate, to go back and do an updated Review! because I do thoroughly trust this. Review!. And also like, there wasn't like inherent humor. I feel like WaiMate01, would be like my godfather. Like I would trust them. They're only here to make sure I'm happy and taken care of, but because there wasn't very, a lot of humor, no dad jokes. And because it was so many years ago, I've never really considered that the impact of the date of the Review!, but solid Review!. I mean, I want to go there. What about you? Why did you do four and a half crowns?

[00:23:55] CHELSEY DONN: Obviously concur with everything that you've already said? I just think even if it's not intentionally written to be that funny, if I read a review and have such a delightful chuckle, as we had, that's worth at least an extra half crown to me, you know? So for the laugh, the extra half crown, total, yeah.

[00:24:20] TREY GERRALD: All right. Well, let's take a quick little break. And when we come back, we're going to hear a completely different side of the story.

[00:24:28] CHELSEY DONN: Oh God. I'm like nervous. I'm nervous. I've been swimming and five star reviews. I like I'm feel very defensive, but I'll let my guard down. Okay. I love it.

[00:24:36] TREY GERRALD: Well, when we come back, you're going to hear one of the 10 one-star reviews, so prepared.

[00:24:41] CHELSEY DONN: All right. I'm preparing myself. All right. Be right back.

[00:24:47] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown. We'll be right back.

[00:24:59] Meryl-Go-Round

[00:24:59] TREY GERRALD: It's Game time! All right, Chelsey, let's get ready to take a quick spin on the Meryl Streep-Go-round.

[00:25:31] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Here's the deal. Trey and I have each picked a rotten scathing, pithy One-Star-Zinger and with 30 seconds on the clock, we'll take turns, trying to recite the zinger in as many genres as possible.

[00:25:45] TREY GERRALD: Just like queen Meryl Streep, who does it all

[00:25:47] CHELSEY DONN: before the clock runs out and Trey, you are first with the zingers today. So let us know. Where's your Zinger from?

[00:25:54] TREY GERRALD: I have a One-Star-Zinger from Google reviews, this is for Hot Hands. Do you know what this is?

[00:26:01] CHELSEY DONN: Little packets that you put inside the glove, right?

[00:26:05] TREY GERRALD: Exactly. Yes.

[00:26:05] CHELSEY DONN: Those actually can work quite well.

[00:26:08] TREY GERRALD: Well, I've got a one-star for it.

[00:26:10] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, Right, right, right.

[00:26:11] TREY GERRALD: This is, um, written by all caps, LINDA!

[00:26:15] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, Linda,

[00:26:18] TREY GERRALD: And the One-Star-Zinger is, did not meet expectation of being quote unquote hot dot dot warm. Yes. Warm hands. How do you end up just doing two dot dots. Like how do you miss the one dot?

[00:26:36] CHELSEY DONN: I also think Maybe like everyone's definition of hot and warm is different. And Linda, all caps might really need it to be hot, hot, hot, you know? Okay. So I'm going to strap you in today to a crystal ball.

[00:26:51] TREY GERRALD: Ooh. Like that emoji.

[00:26:54] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Let's do it.

[00:26:55] TREY GERRALD: Okay.

[00:26:55] VOICEOVER: 3, 2, 1, Go!

[00:26:55] VOICEOVER: To our,

[00:27:00] VOICEOVER: ah, did not meet expectation of being hot. Ah, warm. Yes.

[00:27:05] VOICEOVER: Televangelist

[00:27:11] VOICEOVER: Superman here

[00:27:13] VOICEOVER: did not meet the expectation of being hot, warm. Yes.

[00:27:17] VOICEOVER: Sports

[00:27:18] VOICEOVER: announcer does not

[00:27:20] VOICEOVER: make the

[00:27:20] VOICEOVER: expectation of being hot, warm gas,

[00:27:24] VOICEOVER: Disney,

[00:27:25] VOICEOVER: 3, 2, 1, That's all.

[00:27:32] CHELSEY DONN: Trey. That's five, which for one, as long as that is excellent. Good job Queen.

[00:27:38] TREY GERRALD: Thank you. Thank you. What about you, Chelsey? What is your One-Star-Zinger for today?

[00:27:42] CHELSEY DONN: My One-Star-Zinger is from Amazon and it is a one-star review of a men's Timberland. Boot white ledge, mid waterproof boot, dark brown, nine M U S. Okay?

[00:28:02] VOICEOVER: It's supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

[00:28:07] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, no idea what that is. Even thought it is 20 words long.

[00:28:11] CHELSEY DONN: It's a size nine Timberland in dark brown. Pretty much. This is written by Isabella, J L. It's a pretty name. One star is the subject and it says it's not originally. It's fake.

[00:28:27] TREY GERRALD: I'm finding a theme trend here with these One-Star-Zinger is where people just don't do any autocorrect. They just push send.

[00:28:37] CHELSEY DONN: It's not originally it's fake.

[00:28:40] TREY GERRALD: All right. So I am going to strap you in today. Of course, on a chair left.

[00:28:45] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my god. How fancy.

[00:28:47] TREY GERRALD: Or a ski lift. Are those the same thing??

[00:28:50] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. I've been on one of those I've just never gotten off, to ski.

[00:28:53] TREY GERRALD: Take me back! Okay, Chelsey. Are you ready?

[00:28:58] CHELSEY DONN: I am ready.

[00:28:59] TREY GERRALD: All right, here we go.

[00:29:01] VOICEOVER: 3, 2, 1, GO!

[00:29:09] VOICEOVER: By

[00:29:10] VOICEOVER: Yankee

[00:29:11] VOICEOVER: originally it's

[00:29:14] VOICEOVER: Southern.

[00:29:18] VOICEOVER: It's not, it's not, it's not originally. It's

[00:29:23] VOICEOVER: operative. It's not originally mute romcom

[00:29:31] VOICEOVER: breaking news.

[00:29:35] VOICEOVER: Lifetime.

[00:29:36] VOICEOVER: 3, 2, 1. That's all!

[00:29:37] TREY GERRALD: Three Four five six. Chelsey.

[00:29:39] CHELSEY DONN: It is so hard. Thank you. But it is so hard to do the Yankee/Southern back-to-back.

[00:29:45] TREY GERRALD: It is really hard. It's very challenging yet. You still whooped me with 6, diva.

[00:29:50] CHELSEY DONN: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's an honor. It's an honor. And a privilege.

[00:29:55] TREY GERRALD: Take your victory lap on the ski lift.

[00:29:57] CHELSEY DONN: ooo yes

[00:30:00] Antlers At Vail 1 Star Review

[00:30:00] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:30:04] CHELSEY DONN: All right. We are back from that rousing game break and it is Trey's turn. And let's hear it, Trey. I got to hear this one star review. I've been waiting.

[00:30:13] TREY GERRALD: All right. This is a doozy. So everyone get ready. I have a one star review for Antlers At Vail from TripAdvisor that was written by Andrew.

[00:30:24] CHELSEY DONN: Kay.

[00:30:25] TREY GERRALD: And the subject is the human turd parentheses poop comma crap. end parentheses pool dash Antlers at vail.

[00:30:39] CHELSEY DONN: Oh My God, is it? No.

[00:30:42] TREY GERRALD: So here we go. The human turd pool at the Antlers. How can you trust a hotel that lets a guest swim in a pool polluted by human feces, and that tries to deny any responsibility for the pool. Quote, my daughter swam down to pick up a rock that turned out to be feces!

[00:31:03] CHELSEY DONN: [GASP]

[00:31:08] TREY GERRALD: Parenthesis, poop, comma, turd, comma, crap, end parentheses and Antlers At Vail denied any responsibility for the pool, end quote.

[00:31:21] TREY GERRALD: First allow me to say that I am no kid and I've traveled all over the United States, as well as Canada, Mexico, Cuba, Panama, Italy, France, and Portugal. This was caps. The worst experience I and my family have had dot dot dot anywhere.

[00:31:42] TREY GERRALD: Swimming with poop or feces was made worse by an uncaring slash unpleasant general manager and untrained staff. I've been using TripAdvisor for over a decade and find it to offer critical insight on hotels and restaurants. The reason I use TripAdvisor is that my family time is precious and it is critical that we have the best possible trip every time. For this reason, it's important to share our experience at the Antlers At Vail and encourage others to research hotels before booking.

[00:32:21] TREY GERRALD: Pool on Friday, August 21st, my family went down to the pool for one last swim. At this point, we had stayed at the Antlers At Vail for nearly a week. It's worth noting that we visited the pool every day. My daughter and I jumped into the pool and played with a water torpedo for what seemed like 20 minutes or so I jumped out to check my phone or something and was brought back to the pool by my daughter. See had noticed quote-unquote rocks on the bottom of the pool and swam down to get them out of the pool.

[00:33:00] TREY GERRALD: When she grabbed the first rock it's squished in her hand. Oh, yep. We had been swimming in human feces the entire time. Do you open your eyes underwater? Does some pool water ever slip into your mouth by accident? Yep. My daughter swam down to a human turd with her eyes open and grabbed it, thinking it was a rock.

[00:33:29] TREY GERRALD: Welcome to the quote Human Turd Pool by Antlers at Vail!

[00:33:35] TREY GERRALD: We vacated the pool and went to our room for hot soapy showers. When I reported the feces to Justin at the front desk, I was told the pool was closed. Maintenance was gone for the day and he was sorry about that. He didn't seem overly concerned about human crap in the pool! Later, he called back to tell me they were going to close the pool and drain it due to the feces they found. What a concept.

[00:34:05] TREY GERRALD: The next day I received a call from Kim who informed me. She was the assistant general manager. Kim confirms that housekeeping was to be at the pool every hour to wipe down chairs and tables, but they didn't really inspect the pool. She also shared that that was okay because the Antlers At Vail disclose that the pool isn't monitored.

[00:34:29] TREY GERRALD: She tried to quote unquote, sell me on the idea that the Antlers wasn't responsible for the pool. Then oddly, she asked what they could do to make us happy. She said, they obviously couldn't give us a condo for life, but they were very sorry and would do whatever possible to make up for the awful event. She seemed reasonable and fair. I later called back and asked Kim to comp our stay. And I thought that was the very least the Antlers At Vail could do.

[00:35:02] TREY GERRALD: On Wednesday. The 27th parentheses, we checked out Saturday, the 22nd, I received a call from Magdalena King GM. Yes. It took six days for the GM to bother to call. She acted very concerned and requested. I rehash the entire story. After I shared the story, once again, she completely changed her attitude and tone. She denied that the Antlers At Vail had any responsibility for the pool and that they would comp a night As this was more than reasonable for swimming around in human feces. To recap, we swam in a pool contaminated by three chunks of human feces.

[00:35:45] TREY GERRALD: The rest of the hotel: Beds. The beds are very hard and uncomfortable and they alone are enough reason to not visit the Antlers At Vail. I couldn't wait to get into my own bed at home.

[00:35:55] TREY GERRALD: AC. Initially the AC system in the unit didn't function, I found that a breaker was flipped. So I was able to get the one in the living room on. The master bedroom, AC never functioned and due to COVID. We were told that they were limiting maintenance visits.

[00:36:12] TREY GERRALD: Humidifiers. The one in the room was broken and the one they sent up seemed to function, but in five days didn't need refilled. So both were broken. Ugh. This place could be amazing, but it's more like an Airbnb gone bad with an unpleasant general manager running the show.

[00:36:37] CHELSEY DONN: Oh, my God,

[00:36:39] TREY GERRALD: four people have found this helpful and it was written in 2020.

[00:36:44] CHELSEY DONN: I'm exhausted.

[00:36:46] TREY GERRALD: What a journey, huh?

[00:36:46] CHELSEY DONN: Wow. So much to unpack, Trey.

[00:36:50] TREY GERRALD: I want to tell you, they lay out roughly the dates they were there. So I looked to see what the three bedroom suite for August would be for a week and it's $4,620. Just keep that in your noggin.

[00:37:06] CHELSEY DONN: Wow. That's a lot of money. Yeah. Okay. First and foremost, complete mismanagement and lack of communication between the team. Is it the Antlers fault that some guests like let's go with the actual backstory of what happened. There was a guest that stayed at this hotel. Allowed. I would hope a child to go into the pool and their child went to the bathroom in the pool and nobody was monitoring it close enough to realize that that had happened. Right. And so are they responsible in the fact that like it was their staff that pooped in the pool? Like, no, but when something like that happens, you have to do everything and they, I think they absolutely should have comped their whole stay.

[00:37:51] TREY GERRALD: Really?!

[00:37:52] CHELSEY DONN: I, I do actually. Yeah, I do, because I think that this is like, that is so it's one thing. If they just like stepped in the pool and saw it and ran out, you know what I mean? I was like thinking it was like that scene in, um, in Caddyshack where they like to see it like floating and then everybody's like run out of the pool and then ends up being a candy bar. But like, this was like, they were interacting with like, it's just so gross. I mean, the Review! is gross. The score. the word squish. I nearly puked.

[00:38:26] TREY GERRALD: I mean, that daughter learned a very valuable lesson that day!

[00:38:29] CHELSEY DONN: Don't grab the rocks at the bottom of the pool!

[00:38:31] TREY GERRALD: Mmm-hmmm!

[00:38:31] CHELSEY DONN: But like, I mean, it was interesting. I feel like it kind of went on a journey. There were moments where I thought Andrew was a Ken.

[00:38:37] TREY GERRALD: Male Karen. Yep.

[00:38:38] CHELSEY DONN: Male Karen. Cause he was just --

[00:38:41] VOICEOVER: Oh my God, It's a Karen--

[00:38:42] TREY GERRALD: KEN!

[00:38:43] CHELSEY DONN: Ken! Just because like they were going on and on. And like what about when they were like rock feces, turd, crap, crap poo... They just had like a million. They basically like search the synonyms and then copy paste it.

[00:38:58] TREY GERRALD: Yes. I think this is a perfect segue. Just we have to straight away I think that Andrew is going after people like you, who searches key phrases and words. They're trying to throw in as many zinging popping words to catch anything also, I just need you to know. I have never in my life. I have never seen a Review! like. There's literally the introductory statement followed by two enters. Then there's a quote, just a quote of like the meat and potatoes of this. Review! my daughter.

[00:39:35] CHELSEY DONN: I wrote that down because there was a quote end quote. I, I, I started that, like what? They actually, they quoted themselves in the,

[00:39:43] TREY GERRALD: themselves

[00:39:44] CHELSEY DONN: in the beginning.

[00:39:45] TREY GERRALD: Yes.

[00:39:46] CHELSEY DONN: Yeesh. Okay.

[00:39:47] TREY GERRALD: Isn't that weird?

[00:39:48] CHELSEY DONN: Very strange.

[00:39:50] TREY GERRALD: And then they do a little statement, like a personal statement paragraph about how they've traveled all over the world and why they trust and use TripAdvisor. And then they break down. Pool. Yeah, which goes on forever beds, AC humidifiers, and then there's a conclusion at the end. So like an Andrew must be a professor.

[00:40:11] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. This could be submitted. This could be handed in is what you're saying.

[00:40:15] TREY GERRALD: Yeah. They definitely did a spell check on this. The only spelling error he says C had noticed quote, unquote rocks. And they meant to say she had noticed.

[00:40:25] CHELSEY DONN: Right, right, right. Right. I like the fact that Andrew decided to point out to us that they were not a kid!

[00:40:31] TREY GERRALD: Very important,

[00:40:32] CHELSEY DONN: you know, personally grateful that he pointed that out. Also, what about like the expectation of every time I travel with my family, it has got to be the best experience ever. I think those are very high expectations taking out of consideration, the disgustingness of the situation.

[00:40:52] TREY GERRALD: You know, I think it's interesting in context, because I think it's a funny statement, but when I really dissect it, I think the point as I don't want the place that we're staying to be a contributing factor to if it's the best experience or not, but, but wait, I'm really confused because you pointed out earlier and your reasoning as to why the whole wheat should be comped.

[00:41:15] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah.

[00:41:16] TREY GERRALD: I was really following your reasoning as like, so is the hotel responsible for like, uh, guests poop?

[00:41:24] CHELSEY DONN: I mean, I th okay. Are they responsible? No, but is it their responsibility to deal with it in the way that like a customer is always. Yes. Like,

[00:41:33] TREY GERRALD: and Andrew mentions at the end COVID. And so this was written in August, 2020. So you would think that they would really be stringent.

[00:41:42] CHELSEY DONN: Exactly. And even if they had said like, oh my God, I'm mortified. I'm so sorry that this happened before our staff could have seen it. We obviously would have addressed it right away. What's very strange. Is all the back and forth between the staff to me. Right? Yeah. Justin is the first line of defense. Now my opinion on Justin is I feel like he must be new or young or something like that, because most people that have been around the block a few times know that if somebody, God forbid does poop in a pool, you have to drain it. It is like the first thing that you do, Justin obviously didn't know that. So Justin then obviously picked up the phone and called somebody else. And that person was like, of course, apologize and say, we're going to empty the pool. Like, are you crazy? You don't know that you should have told them that when they came in. And up until like the comp portion, I was like, oh, it does seem like they're handling it. Well, like, obviously we can't give you a lifetime, you know, stay at our condo. But. Anything short of that we will do. So at that point in the Review! I was thinking, all right, like it's a gross, terrible situation, but it's not really their fault. And at least they're taking accountability. It seems like this Justin Guy didn't really know what he was talking about. They're they're wanting to do something.

[00:42:55] TREY GERRALD: Yes.

[00:42:55] CHELSEY DONN: And then This woman calls up and is like trying to reneg what was already said, like that was where the hotel really lost me.

[00:43:03] TREY GERRALD: Yes. So do you think that Andrew is being truthful or shady?

[00:43:08] CHELSEY DONN: I think Andrew was being truthful. I think Andrew is appalled. They obviously really pride themselves on their ability to describe scenarios at length and in like the breaking down of every element and giving us this whole dissertation, there's a bit of a performative vibe here from Andrew.

[00:43:26] TREY GERRALD: Right. I always feel this way when something really negative happens. Like it's even just looking at it in print. There's like 12 paragraphs about the pool. And then there's two sentences about the beds, four sentences about the AAC, two sentences about the humidifiers. So I feel like Andrew's tacking on other things that were subpar. Like they're just, they're choosing to list the things that were terrible because it's a One Star Review. Which, you know, makes sense.

[00:43:52] CHELSEY DONN: Exactly. Exactly. So,

[00:43:54] TREY GERRALD: I mean, okay so, do you think that this was a fluke or do you think this is a common experience?

[00:44:00] CHELSEY DONN: It does make me wonder if maybe some of these employees that had been there for like 30 plus years are some of those people that were like the veterans of this place pieced out. And I think that unfortunately, the people that are running the hotel, they can really make or break the experience. So, if there was a change, it can have us substantial impact.

[00:44:23] TREY GERRALD: Do you think that they'll put up a picture of Justin and some words under it?

[00:44:26] CHELSEY DONN: I don't think justin is going to last.

[00:44:29] TREY GERRALD: He Probably doesn't work there anymore.

[00:44:31] TREY GERRALD: It's hard for me to say if the pool experience is going to be a common or a fluke, I think the response to it was highly inappropriate. As far as the beds. I mean, I think that sleeping preferences are so crazy. You can buy firm mattress, whatever, whatever. The ACS, I don't understand. I mean, that seems complicated. I also don't even understand the point of view humidifier. I don't, I don't get what the point does that something to do with,

[00:44:54] CHELSEY DONN: if the air is very dry then it causes

[00:44:57] CHELSEY DONN: Oh.

[00:44:57] TREY GERRALD: It's

[00:44:57] CHELSEY DONN: right.

[00:44:57] TREY GERRALD: Okay. Yeah. All right. There there's some impacts for me there. Okay. Humor. Is this humorous or we entertained grossed out.

[00:45:04] CHELSEY DONN: I'm grossed out. Like I don't usually go over the poop humor, especially with the Review!. I don't even know that you would call this poop humor, because this was a Review! about poop -

[00:45:14] TREY GERRALD: It's a Poop Tragedy.-

[00:45:15] CHELSEY DONN: It was not humorous. This is a poop tragedy, poop tragedy. This is a turd tragedy. This is a, gimme some synonyms, Trey.

[00:45:22] TREY GERRALD: Crap tragedy,

[00:45:24] CHELSEY DONN: crap Right?

[00:45:26] CHELSEY DONN: It's a tragedy. I don't know. I feel very conflicted about how to go about,

[00:45:31] TREY GERRALD: just think about the impact here. That's how I'm going to try to assess this. What is the impact for this resort for you? Let's crown it that way. How do you feel?

[00:45:40] CHELSEY DONN: Okay. Okay.

[00:45:41] TREY GERRALD: All right. So here we go.

[00:45:43] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating. Total Score!

[00:45:51] CHELSEY DONN: Interesting. Okay. So I'm holding up three crowns. Trey is holding up four crowns. I'm giving Andrew three crowns because I think that the situation was very mishandled and it does make me queasy, but I can't say that this would be a common experience that would happen. I think forever moving forward in my life, I will be impacted by Andrew in that every pool I get into that's a public pool. I will be taking an extra look And the three crowns are just validating that experience and validating that truth of if this happened to me and my family, they would go ballistic too. So took off the two crowns. Pompacity. And also just because I don't think this is going to happen to every person that goes to Antlers. So that's why to three crowns. Why did you do four?

[00:46:37] TREY GERRALD: It's one of those interesting things. When it comes to customer service, like hospitality, it's like Justin really drops the ball. And then it seems that the assistant general manager try to like rectify. And then they had to report to the GM who like had a different, like, it's just, it all was bad dominoes, but it does make me feel like, Ooh, like how did they not catch that it's in there, especially in the world of COVID where like we're being hypersensitive to like cleanliness. So I said four because it's sort of leaving like a little impression on me. And when I'm comparing that. How many did I say there's 10 one-star reviews compared to six hundred and seventy eight, five star reviews. I mean, that's pretty uneven. That's why I did four. It's not humorous took it off. And I don't think it's probably a common thing,

[00:47:30] There's A Reply

[00:47:30] TREY GERRALD: so,

[00:47:32] VOICEOVER: There's A Reply!

[00:47:34] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my, Ohmy is it from Margalena Or Whatever her name is. Oh my God. It is Oh my God I am so curious. Okay, here we go.

[00:47:43] TREY GERRALD: This is an M Night Shyamalan twist.

[00:47:46] CHELSEY DONN: GASP Stop it. I'm so scared. Oh my God. Did the daughter poop? Was it the daughter who pooped?

[00:47:51] CHELSEY DONN: GASP Ohmigod I'm scared Okay Ok

[00:47:52] TREY GERRALD: Here we go. This is a response from Magda King. Who is the GM

[00:47:57] CHELSEY DONN: Okay

[00:47:58] TREY GERRALD: Dear Andrew, to tell you that I am sorry about your experience at the Antlers would be an understatement. I am mortified by what happened. We work very hard at guest satisfaction and have held top excellent rating positions and TripAdvisor, Google, and many other ranking sites. For many, many years. It is our reputation that enables us to compete with every other corporate hotel in Vail. We yet, again, closely reviewed the video footage from that evening at the pool. It very clearly shows a timeline of events that appears to be different than what you have presented.

[00:48:39] TREY GERRALD: This is a bullet list by the way,

[00:48:41] TREY GERRALD: 7:00 PM your daughter playing in the pool and coming to tell you something, at which point you both move from the pool to one of our hot tubs where your family remained until about 8:00 PM.

[00:48:55] TREY GERRALD: Next bullet, just after 8:00 PM. Still not having been notified of the issue by you. Our staff closes and covers the pool for the night. Next bullet 8:45 PM. Our staff received a call from you reporting the issue. Our front desk agent immediately contacted our chief engineer who then proceeded to put the pool area out of order and began comprehensive disinfection procedures. Following CDC guidelines, the pool remained closed for 36 hours to be sure that all cleaning protocols were completed and that the pool was safe for our guests. Our priority is always the contentment, health and safety of all of our guests. We have the most stringent COVID-19 sanitation processes in place.

[00:49:46] TREY GERRALD: Continuing to leave rooms 24 hours between guests and much more. The pool area is no different. We took the issue very seriously and immediately took steps to ensure its cleanliness for all guests. I wish you would have reported this immediately so that you could have seen this in person. The context of your conversation was that of demanding a full refund of a week long, stay in a three bedroom condo plus free future stays.

[00:50:20] TREY GERRALD: In fact, in the final conversation I had with you, you told me that if I didn't give you a full refund, you would ruin our reputation, the Antlers At Vail, as known for caring deeply about guest satisfaction. And we believe that the compensation that we offered was fair. Given the circumstances of the event as shown in our surveillance footage. Warmest, regards, Magdalena, I. King.

[00:50:51] TREY GERRALD: Whaaaat?

[00:50:51] CHELSEY DONN: I think the daughter pooped in the pool.

[00:50:56] TREY GERRALD: Do you think?

[00:50:57] CHELSEY DONN: Is that what happened?

[00:50:58] TREY GERRALD: I was under the impression that Andrew was freaking out and they had to go shower off the poop, but Magdalena says the video footage shows that they got into the hot tub. So obviously the daughter didn't squish the poop in her hand, also Magdalena highlights that there was a lot of demand for future -

[00:51:17] CHELSEY DONN: And saying that they would ruin the reputation.

[00:51:20] TREY GERRALD: Yes. And it's interesting that Andrew says that the assistant said, obviously we can't give you a lifetime free room. And Magdalena is saying you were demanding lifetime

[00:51:32] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. This and future visits, which they never mentioned in the review.

[00:51:35] TREY GERRALD: And so, I don't know, there's always two sides to every story, but there seems to be a lot of omission from Andrew. And I think that Magdalena, my opinion is they handled this retort very well.

[00:51:47] CHELSEY DONN: I think so too. I mean, especially because they started like, not only am I sorry, but I am mortified,

[00:51:53] TREY GERRALD: which is what we were saying. in our review. Yeah.

[00:51:57] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. It does seem like they're doing what I said I would have wanted.

[00:52:02] TREY GERRALD: But It seems like Andrew is trying to spin this into getting a freebie. And it seems like Magdalena is catching that. And it's saying, we'll give you one night, but we have reviewed surveillance footage and the events don't match what you're claiming. So now we're not giving you a lifetime free room and we're not comping the week,