TRANSCRIPT of Episode 56: "Tattoo Salon: 1 vs 5 Stars"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 55: "Tattoo Salon: 1 vs 5 Stars"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

[00:00:00] Chelsey Donn: One, Two, Three!

[00:00:02] Trey Gerrald: buckle my shoe. Three, four, shut that door.

[00:00:07] Chelsey Donn: Five, Six, pick up sticks.

[00:00:11] Trey Gerrald: Seven, eight. I'm not straight.

[00:00:14] Chelsey Donn: Nine, 10. That's the end.

THEME SONG: [00:00:16] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:48] Chelsey Donn: hi,

[00:00:49] Trey Gerrald: hello. Chels! Hello listeners. Welcome to Review That Review the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:58] Chelsey Donn: Reviews! We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:01:10] Trey Gerrald: that is Chelsey Donn

[00:01:12] Chelsey Donn: And that is TreyGerrald.

[00:01:14] Trey Gerrald: and together.

[00:01:15] Trey Gerrald: We are.

[00:01:16] VOICEOVER: TheReviewQueens.

[00:01:20] Trey Gerrald: For access to additional reviews and tidbits on our weekly members only after show companion podcast, plus videos, merch discounts, and a whole lot more, truly, visit our Patreon! All you got to do is go to

[00:01:36] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey Goose! Guess what I'm holding right here.

[00:01:40] Chelsey Donn: Oh, my goodness. It's an Amazon package that I sent a tray that maybe will be helpful.

[00:01:47] Trey Gerrald: Let's see, I'm going to open it

[00:01:48] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. Let's see.

[00:01:50] Trey Gerrald: This is a great plug for our, um, Patreon, if you want to watch. Oh, I

[00:01:58] Chelsey Donn: in plastic, so fresh and so clean.

[00:02:02] Trey Gerrald: wrapping.

[00:02:03] Chelsey Donn: Oh, thank you. can't take credit for that. Is it soft? So it's the, oh, I kind of like how it's like sort of tie

[00:02:12] Trey Gerrald: dye.

[00:02:14] Chelsey Donn: I wasn't expecting that, but I

[00:02:16] Trey Gerrald: I actually really liked that,

[00:02:17] Chelsey Donn: I think I might've turned tray into a three Wolf's howling at the moon kind of guy.

[00:02:22] Trey Gerrald: it's a hundred percent cotton, so it does feel like a, like a Hanes t-shirt.

[00:02:26] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[00:02:27] Trey Gerrald: Should I put it on

[00:02:28] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, you can. So Trey's wearing the three wolves howling at the moon shirt. That was, was that last week.

[00:02:34] Trey Gerrald: last week.

[00:02:35] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Yeah. See, thank God for Amazon. Really on top of that, um, already. Nice AMR.

[00:02:45] Trey Gerrald: well, I feel sexy.

[00:02:47] Chelsey Donn: Do you really.

[00:02:48] Trey Gerrald: And if you don't know what we're talking about, go back on your podcast player and listen to our three Wolf Review! episodes.

[00:02:55] Chelsey Donn: Yes. And then you'll be in the know. Do you have something you want to get off your chest?

[00:03:00] Trey Gerrald: Yes, actually, today I really have a very maddening complaint and I'm ready to.

[00:03:07] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint.

[00:03:08] Trey Gerrald: Against button down. T-shirts that come folded in their packaging?

[00:03:15] Chelsey Donn: Interesting.

[00:03:17] Trey Gerrald: Y. do we fold nice button down shirts that we know we're going to have to iron? Why, why they always have those metal clips? They're like weird paperclips that like leave indents on like The sleeves on the neck.

[00:03:34] Trey Gerrald: They always folded all weird. Cause they make it a little square. And then it's like this shirt I'm specifically purchasing. Nice. And wrinkle-free, it kills me when it's a wrinkle-free material. And the first thing you do is you unpackage it. You have that cardboard, you have those weird, like plastic things around the button.

[00:03:54] Trey Gerrald: like, yes, then sometimes there's this random tissue paper and it's like, I'm fighting to get all the clips off. Then they fall on the ground. I have to pick it up from my dogs, bite it. And then it's like, I like do that thing where you're like to like,

[00:04:06] Chelsey Donn: sure.

[00:04:06] Trey Gerrald: what I'm talking about? When you have a shirt

[00:04:08] Trey Gerrald: it's

[00:04:08] Chelsey Donn: like

[00:04:09] Trey Gerrald: out.

[00:04:09] Trey Gerrald: dryer? Yeah.

[00:04:10] Trey Gerrald: You shake and it's like wrinkle to all hell. It's like It's like the shirt was packaged seven years ago and it's been in some grandmas addict. And now here I am having at it's like I'm running late. I'm excited for my new shirt and it's all wrinkled. There's like 900 wrinkles. And then I have to like figure out cause like starches and on trend anymore.

[00:04:32] Trey Gerrald: And it's like, well, now I have to heat up my iron because a steamer is not going to get These out because these are.

[00:04:38] Trey Gerrald: like severe creases. Do you, have you ever experienced that? Is that like blouses? I feel like you're usually on hangers, but like I'm buttoned down

[00:04:47] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I think it's not like I have, cause I have a few like nice Ralph Lauren button downs, but in the women's section, usually those are sold on hangers where I feel like in the men's section, it's more like, I don't know, I could be wrong. Just have them all staff.

[00:05:04] Trey Gerrald: yes. Both exist, but like, they are like folded. I mean, I guess

[00:05:09] Chelsey Donn: No. I know you mean,

[00:05:11] Trey Gerrald: to like ship that probably to like a store or something. Well, that's my complaint.

[00:05:16] Chelsey Donn: Okay. That's fair. I hear you.

[00:05:19] Trey Gerrald: what about you? Is there anything you. want to complain?

[00:05:21] Chelsey Donn: Well, yeah, like in the interest of talking about time and how it feels like I have less and less of it, I might've brought this complaint up before. I don't care. I'm going to bring it up again.

[00:05:33] Trey Gerrald: okay.

[00:05:34] Chelsey Donn: Why do I have to talk to a robot before I talk to a human?

[00:05:37] Chelsey Donn: I would almost rather be put on hold unpopular opinion maybe, but when I call the pharmacy.

[00:05:44] Trey Gerrald: oh

[00:05:45] Chelsey Donn: Every time, like even today, I really need to call the pharmacy. Cause there's something I need to deal with that. Like, they didn't send me one of my prescriptions and I needed to deal with that. But I was like, I can't call the pharmacy right now because that's like a two hour commitment because first I need to talk to a robot, convince the robot that yes, I need to speak with a pharmacist.

[00:06:08] Chelsey Donn: After I do that, then I wait on hold for like an hour to talk to a pharmacist. So it's just such a long process. Maybe like this is kind of, I guess, specific to the pharmacy, but really in general, it's fine. If you're going to have one, that's like to go to, you know, to be directed to the pharmacy press, One,, that's fine.

[00:06:27] Chelsey Donn: But I mean like I'm a robot that can handle full sentences. Please tell me what it is that you need help with today. Like, no.

[00:06:34] Trey Gerrald: I didn't get that. Repeat that.

[00:06:36] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, exactly. Representative representative representative. I mean, how many times do I have to say it,

[00:06:42] Trey Gerrald: Did you say orange Tabby cat, if not repeated again,

[00:06:47] Chelsey Donn: It's so annoying. So you do want to hear the prescriptions we have on file.

[00:06:53] Chelsey Donn: No, I don't. I don't. I don't.