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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 60: "Water Park: 1 vs 5 Stars"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 60: "Water Park: 1 vs 5 Stars"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: Hello!

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Hello and welcome to Review That Review the podcast dedicated to reviewing...

[00:00:39] Chelsey Donn: Hello Reviews. That's right. We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:54] Trey Gerrald: That is Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:56] Chelsey Donn: And that is Trey. Gerrald.

[00:00:58] Trey Gerrald: And together we are

[00:01:00] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens.

[00:01:04] Trey Gerrald: for access to additional reviews and tidbits on our weekly members only after show companion podcast, plus videos, merch discounts, and a whole lot more. Visit our Patreon over at

[00:01:21] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey goose. How are ya?

[00:01:24] Chelsey Donn: Oh, my goodness. I'm good. Trey. I love the chicken, the return of the chicken, or is it a Turkey? I don't know either way. I like it.

[00:01:33] Trey Gerrald: some, um, feathered bird, whatever.

[00:01:35] Chelsey Donn: It's a bird with feathers. I'm good swimming along as usual. You know, these recording days just finished Pilates with watch that rock Pilates working on the core, you know, trying to get all the muscles firing.

[00:01:52] Chelsey Donn: So I'm good. How was your week?

[00:01:55] Trey Gerrald: My week is going well, you know, it's, um, really beautiful out, which is so nice. I'm enjoying, I really do. This is funny to have this conversation with someone who lives in LA, but I do enjoy having seasons. I like, you know, winter's my least favorite, but I enjoy the change cuz I think, well, I guess I don't like when it like becomes winter, but I do like when it becomes fall and I really like when it becomes spring and I love when it becomes summer.

[00:02:24] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:02:24] Chelsey Donn: I love when it becomes summer. My fave

[00:02:28] Trey Gerrald: So I'm enjoying that and I enjoy watching the dogs, sun bathing, even though I Donn don't sunbath cuz I'm too Scottish and pale.

[00:02:36] Chelsey Donn: yes, that's true.

[00:02:38] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:02:38] Lodge A Complaint

[00:02:38] Trey Gerrald: Well Chelsey, is there anything that you would like to

[00:02:42] VOICEOVER: Lodge A Complaint.

[00:02:43] Trey Gerrald: about today?

[00:02:44] Chelsey Donn: I've been waiting. I think this is more of a conversation, but like I Donn don't understand why we're at this point. In the world with technology and where everything is at. And I still can't like edit an email.

[00:02:59] Trey Gerrald: What do you mean?

[00:03:00] Chelsey Donn: Like, you know, when you send an email and you make like a stupid typo or you like mess something up in the subject.

[00:03:06] Chelsey Donn: And like, now you're like, oh my God, I just wanna change this. I just think the email should have more technology, like a few options. One, if the person has not opened the email already, and we know that, then I should be able to like, do a full edit. If I have to, if the person has opened the email already, I'm fine with it having be, you know how like on Facebook, when you edit a comment it's like edited, that's fine.

[00:03:36] Chelsey Donn: Give me an edited. I just want a chance to go in there and fix an email. Cuz I had like an exchange earlier today where it was like, I was sort of rushing. I was trying to get a bunch of things done and I just needed to get the email out. So I got it out and then I made a stupid mistake. And like, I saw the stupid mistake that I made.

[00:03:57] Chelsey Donn: And then I had to like send an addendum, being like, sorry, made this stupid mistake. And then I made another stupid mistake in this correction to this. Like, it was just like, I kept messing things up. And I was like, if there was just a function within Gmail where I could edit this, even if the person had to get a freaking alert that I edited, at least it would like stay in one space and like, I wouldn't have to deal with all this back and forth and I could correct things.

[00:04:28] Chelsey Donn: I just think we should be there already as a society personally.

[00:04:33] Trey Gerrald: I agree. I also saw that the new iPhone. That's coming out will have the ability to unsend text messages

[00:04:44] Chelsey Donn: Oh,

[00:04:45] Trey Gerrald: or correct text messages.

[00:04:47] Chelsey Donn: Oh, that's

[00:04:48] Trey Gerrald: And that's the same, like along the same lines of

[00:04:51] Chelsey Donn: Wait. So like, unsend it meaning like if I sent you. A photo that I was like, Trey, delete this after you. I, I send you this photo or something like that. Cuz you know, we always send each other salacious photos of one another. So, so if I was doing that and then I was like, I don't really trust Trey.

[00:05:09] Chelsey Donn: I wanna make sure it's really deleted from his phone. I could then delete it. And it would disappear from your phone.

[00:05:14] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I mean, I guess you could have done a quick screenshot, but, or I could have, but yes, apparently you will be able to remove the sent text.

[00:05:23] Chelsey Donn: so

[00:05:24] Trey Gerrald: Or to edit, but yes, I wish that emails would do that too. It is surprising. I remember that was one of the like perks about Gmail when it first started was like, they give you the option of five seconds to hit undo, but I wish that you could just like post humorously, um, edit.

[00:05:40] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I know even like truly like even if it had to say a little like gray edit in the corner, I really wouldn't care cuz I don't think anybody would be like, oh she's like really trying to change this whole email.

[00:05:54] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. Cuz it's not like we're dealing with the post anymore. It's like, we're not sending a letter that is like done once you send it, like we should be able to change it. It's all digital anyway.

[00:06:06] Chelsey Donn: Totally. I just wish there was like some sort of an undue. I don't know who we can talk to. I personally Donn don't know anyone at Gmail, but if you're listening and you do let them know, this is what the people want. We want it. We're ready.

[00:06:21] Trey Gerrald: Really good.

[00:06:22] Chelsey Donn: Thanks. Trey. How about you? Have you been longing to complain about something?

[00:06:26] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, this is something that comes up for me every week. And it is like, I feel like my complaints often are these like underlying trembling anxiety fits that I have, but one of them is most definitely when you forget trash day and you know, you then have to wait an entire

[00:06:44] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. I hate that.

[00:06:46] Trey Gerrald: hate it. Especially when the trash is full and then it's too much.

[00:06:53] Chelsey Donn: No. And then you gotta live with your trash for the whole week. And then what if like there's too much trash and now what am I waiting until? Like, it just, I'm all of a sudden I'm behind.

[00:07:03] Trey Gerrald: Right. And we keep our trash cans in the garage. We Donn don't have like a little fenced

[00:07:09] Trey Gerrald: off area outside. Right. And then it smells to high.

[00:07:12] Chelsey Donn: Oh

[00:07:13] Trey Gerrald: and then I know David's parents that are, you know, more secluded. They have little like bungee court actions attached to their trash cans because of bears.

[00:07:22] Chelsey Donn: fancy. Oh.

[00:07:23] Trey Gerrald: Well, you don't want the bears to get you.

[00:07:25] Trey Gerrald: I mean, maybe it's not bears in New Jersey, but it's like rodents and outdoor animals. Like they, you know, with their little digits, they can open the trash cans. Anyway, I really hate it because it's a moment of like, oh, I made a mistake and then you have to look at it daily.

[00:07:40] Chelsey Donn: You Donn, Donn don't have anyone to blame except for yourself. Those are the worst kind of annoyances, cuz you're like, it is my fault. I did mess it up. I still don't like it. Still gonna Kvetch about it.

[00:07:50] Trey Gerrald: That's my Complaint, cuz it really does bug me. And I, I always like for the amount of thought that goes into missing trash day, why can't I just have that energy and thought Tuesday night since the trash is picked up on Wednesday morning? Why, why, why

[00:08:05] Chelsey Donn: Why why Murphy

[00:08:07] Trey Gerrald: it is Murphy? Damn you Murphy.

[00:08:09] Chelsey Donn: Damn you Murphy.

[00:08:11] Trey Gerrald: All right. Well, that's my

[00:08:12] Chelsey Donn: Uh, I feel better. I think maybe we should like dig in to some other people's S and so they could feel better.

[00:08:20] Trey Gerrald: I think I would like to take a Complaint and go, Hey, with your

[00:08:26] Assess That Kvetch: Noah's Ark Water Park

[00:08:26] Chelsey Donn: Let's do it.

[00:08:27] Trey Gerrald: Complaint. Let's

[00:08:28] VOICEOVER: Asses That Kvetch.

[00:08:30] Trey Gerrald: and listeners today is yet another versus episode, which means today Chelsey and I will cover both a One-Star-Zinger and a five star trip advisor review on the same topic. Today's topic of choice will be Noah's arc water park,

[00:08:50] Chelsey Donn: That's right for this versus episode, Trey selected the One-Star-Zinger and I selected the five star. So to determine who reads first, we gotta flip that quota. Do you got that quota at the ready Trey

[00:09:07] Trey Gerrald: Donn.

[00:09:08] Chelsey Donn: heads?

[00:09:10] Trey Gerrald: It's heads.

[00:09:11] Chelsey Donn: my goodness. I'm correct. All right.

[00:09:14] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey will read first. So let me share with you listeners in case you have never

[00:09:18] Trey Gerrald: been, here's a little backstory on Noah's arc water park. It's located in Wisconsin and it is in Wisconsin Dells, which I found out as like the water capital of the world, but that's beside the point anyway.

[00:09:33] Chelsey Donn: Oh, that's not besides the point. That's a part of the point,

[00:09:37] Trey Gerrald: That's a part of the

[00:09:38] Chelsey Donn: I think

[00:09:38] Trey Gerrald: Noah's arc water park is located on 70 sprawling acres in the heart of the Wisconsin. Dells Noah's arc is recognized as Donn dun dun the largest waterpark in America, and it features over 40 rides divided into four categories, thrill rides, not for Chelsey, family rides, adventure river, and kitty rides.

[00:10:06] Chelsey Donn: probably.

[00:10:07] Trey Gerrald: Interesting to note, within the thrill rides category, there is a ride called the black and a condo and it is a one of a kind water coaster reaching speeds of up to 35 miles per hour. Inappropriate.

[00:10:24] Chelsey Donn: Wow. That's,

[00:10:26] Trey Gerrald: one needs to go that

[00:10:27] Chelsey Donn: that's very fast on just your person.

[00:10:30] Trey Gerrald: Can a golf cart go 35 miles an hour.

[00:10:33] Chelsey Donn: I mean, I don't think so. That feels

[00:10:35] Trey Gerrald: that seems really fast. That's like the that's faster than like the speed limit inside of like a little

[00:10:42] Chelsey Donn: Do you think you're on one of those like tube things or like those flat things? Or do you think you're just bare bear? I was gonna say assing. It

[00:10:51] Trey Gerrald: have to be on a thing, right.

[00:10:53] Chelsey Donn: I would think

[00:10:54] Trey Gerrald: That's

[00:10:54] Trey Gerrald: really

[00:10:55] Chelsey Donn: very fast. It would have to be very looped up for you to go on there without anything underneath you

[00:11:00] Trey Gerrald: I mean, so scary. All right. So there are 2,845 reviews for Noah's arc water park on trip advisor at the time of this recording with an overall score of 4.0 out of five. So with all of that background info on Noah's arc, let's get into this versus battle and ChelseyBD will go first. Weee.

[00:11:26] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:11:30] Chelsey Donn: here we go. I'm here to defend Noah's arc water park. This is a five star review. It is written by Reagan F

[00:11:41] Trey Gerrald: Okay.

[00:11:43] Chelsey Donn: the subject is amazing summer experience for the whole family, five stars or dots. In this case, five dots. I've never written a review before, but I noticed some negative reviews for this water park that seemed to inaccurately, describe this family fun filled park.

[00:12:06] Chelsey Donn: My family, and I decided to get season passes to this water park this year. And I was pleasantly surprised by the experience over the course of the summer. We've been able to go a little more than half a dozen times so far. Every time we go, the park is kept extremely clean and the staff is extraordinarily pleasant.

[00:12:29] Chelsey Donn: Minus the few exceptions you'll find anywhere. While you do have to stand in some lines. It really depends on the day you go. And what time of year when we went twice in the same week, just the day to day difference was mind blowing. The first day, we were able to go on eight rides in just an hour and a half.

[00:12:52] Chelsey Donn: However, the second day in two hours, we were only able to get on three or four. Please know that three to four rides in two hours is still pretty good as that would only average 30 plus minutes per ride. While at the beginning of the year, some slides were closed personally. I would find it worth it because of less traffic.

[00:13:18] Chelsey Donn: In addition, I saw multiple reviews complaining about the chilly temperature of the water, and while it is true, It is a little cool. It is Wisconsin and people go to a water park to cool off and escape from the heat. So the water is bound to be cool. The park does an incredible job of having areas and rides.

[00:13:42] Chelsey Donn: For those of all ages, the young ones have three smaller splash pads and one larger area, as well as multiple slides geared towards them. I truly hope this helps people deterred because of other negative reviews.

[00:14:07] Trey Gerrald: Interesting Reagan.

[00:14:10] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. This is an interesting review.

[00:14:12] Trey Gerrald: right? It, well, literally the very first thing I wrote down. Is my skepticism, uh, because it is very interesting for someone. I mean, Hey, wait, I'm a walking hypocrite because I've really never written a ne I mean, I've written one review in my life and I'm constantly reading reviews, but it is very interesting to open with.

[00:14:32] Trey Gerrald: I've never written a review before, but they can quote tons of, uh, points about reviews that are written for the specific park. Like they've been doing a lot of research on the negative reviews, so they mention it multiple times, at least twice.

[00:14:49] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. So when I first read Reagan F's review, I was very suspicious, which is why I thought I should bring it in here today for us to discuss. There's not a lot of personality, even though we were giving details, the details felt like kind of basic, like we bought season passes. We went this many times.

[00:15:10] Chelsey Donn: Like it felt a little bit wrote the interesting thing for me about that. I've never written a review before premise or preface, I guess I should say is. I don't know if it makes me more or less suspicious, cuz in a way I'm like you're copying to it. You're being honest. Are you just doing that? Because I can see that you've only had one contribution or are you doing that?

[00:15:37] Chelsey Donn: Because you like actually, you know, like I Donn Donn don't know it's hard, you know, cuz it is, it is transparency, which usually I do like transparency, but also it's cliche. I'm cur I, I almost said that I should have gone second, which I'm feeling like maybe I should have, cuz I didn't really know what, what Reagan F is talking about.

[00:15:57] Chelsey Donn: Cuz I wasn't like thumbing through the One-Star-Zinger reviews, but it does make me wonder what are the One-Star-Zinger reviews complaining about because what I'm gathering, if I'm to use like Reagan sort of like reverse engineering, her review or their review. Sorry. I would think they were complaining about.

[00:16:18] Chelsey Donn: The water being cold. Some of the rides being closed and long lines, I would guess, would be, and like maybe, maybe cleanliness, cuz they said that they they're like extremely clean or maybe attitude cuz they talked about the staff being extremely pleasant. But I Donn don't know. I mean, there is a part of me that buys this narrative because Reagan seems like the kind of person that does go to TripAdvisor and does read a lot of reviews before they make a commitment.

[00:16:49] Chelsey Donn: And maybe in this case they were like, you know what, I'm gonna go anyway. And then when they had a good experience, they were like other people shouldn't be deterred from going for these reviews. So if they're scrolling through some negative reviews, here's things that will maybe address the things in the negative reviews directly that people are complaining about so that you can have a different perspective.

[00:17:12] Chelsey Donn: I don't

[00:17:12] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I mean, I specifically wrote down the day to day is a hugely different experience. Also Reagan points out seasonally it's different,

[00:17:23] Chelsey Donn: Right,

[00:17:24] Trey Gerrald: which I wrote down. Cause I was like, oh, that's such a great point. But then when I thought about it a little more, I was like, well, duh. Like wouldn't you expect that a Tuesday would be less busy than a Saturday.

[00:17:35] Trey Gerrald: And wouldn't you think that the summer would be more busy than the winter, but,

[00:17:40] Chelsey Donn: I would think. Yes. But then at the same time, Donn, don't you think a lot of people in the summer are like, if the, if you have a regular job, that's all year round, you're gonna take the kids to the water park on Saturday,

[00:17:51] Trey Gerrald: well, I I'm gonna take Reagan at face value. I, there is some suspicion for me because of the, like waving of the red flag that they don't write reviews, but they're responding to a plethora of negative reviews. It just feels a little like, um, I don't know. And maybe like there, it could be, there's no malice here.

[00:18:13] Trey Gerrald: It's genuinely, like, I Donn don't know why I saw these negative reviews. It was great for us, you know? And

[00:18:18] Chelsey Donn: Right. That's

[00:18:19] Trey Gerrald: you that you're gonna wait a little longer on day to day, but. I guess the energy of wanting to dispel experiences that you haven't personally felt. I don't know why that should even ring as suspicious, but it does kind of and whatever, but okay.

[00:18:36] Trey Gerrald: I Donn, I guess maybe I don't understand weather to me where, where is Wisconsin on the map? I thought that Wisconsin was like cold.

[00:18:46] Chelsey Donn: In the summer, Wisconsin can get really hot.

[00:18:49] Trey Gerrald: Right. But for some reason, I think if Wisconsin is like snowy.

[00:18:52] Chelsey Donn: Also that sentence was like really confusing. The one that was written there was like no punctuation in that sentence. And it was a little hard to tell exactly what they meant.

[00:19:02] Trey Gerrald: Hmm. So if I'm, so I know my in-laws, once again, I keep bringing them up this episode, but they have a pool and that's just a normal house pool. And I know that it's very expensive to heat the

[00:19:14] Chelsey Donn: Yes, it is.

[00:19:16] Trey Gerrald: I am imagining that like, if this is a 70 acre

[00:19:21] Chelsey Donn: Right. The water's gonna be cold because they can't keep

[00:19:24] Trey Gerrald: well, I would imagine like you can't heat it, especially if it is outdoors, like,

[00:19:30] Chelsey Donn: And like, to be fair, I feel like how weird would it be to have a warm water park? Like, I mean, maybe as an adult, you'd be like, lovely, like a lazy river, but like, if it's not a lazy river and you're doing like a thrill seeking ride, like part of it getting into the water and it being cold, especially on a hot, hot day, hot summer day, that's why you're going, you're going to cool off.

[00:19:54] Chelsey Donn: And I think that that's the

[00:19:56] Trey Gerrald: correct. Yeah. You, yeah, no, I get that. So, okay. Off the bat, I think the value unique information, like it is hitting me and occurring to me. be conscious of what you're contributing to the possible experience you're gonna have like maybe try to go on an off time or an off season if you can. And I also am getting okay.

[00:20:21] Trey Gerrald: If, if it's possible to hit three to four rides in four hours in two hours. Okay. That's probably good. I mean, I imagine if it's the largest park in America, there's gonna be lots of people.

[00:20:33] Chelsey Donn: Reagan does a good job of managing expectations, which I appreciate

[00:20:36] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. So you mentioned the spelling error. What else is, is there going on there?

[00:20:41] Chelsey Donn: it just wasn't great. We had a lot of run on sentences. Um, it wasn't terrible, but I definitely wouldn't give it a perfect score. It's very interesting to me because. I am feeling a little bit of the vibe of what I say. I really love in a Review Queen, which is that balance, right? Like I don't trust a review if a review is just like, this is the most amazing thing since slice spread.

[00:21:07] Chelsey Donn: It's amazing. I love it. You're gonna love it. We're all gonna love it. Yay. We're loving it. Like I just, I don't believe you, like, I like having a positive review that says, yeah. You know what? I did have to wait in line. Yeah. You know what? It was a little bit cold. Like I appreciate that. Like, I still think you can have a five star review and be really impactful and include some of that stuff.

[00:21:31] Chelsey Donn: I think so normally that's all great. And I think that Reagan does that really well. I think where I'm struggling. Is because we said that we've never written a review before, because we're addressing the negative reviewers directly, even though it's hard, cuz that is Reagan being a Review Queen by doing her due diligence.

[00:21:50] Chelsey Donn: But there's something within that that makes me feel like I Donn don't 100% trust you, Reagan. I don't know. Is it just us? Cuz we're so like jaded and we've been doing this for so long.

[00:22:04] Trey Gerrald: Well, okay. But, but speaking in this question to truthful or shady, to your point, once again, I appreciated them saying everyone was pleasant minus, you know, the rare exception, which is gonna

[00:22:15] Trey Gerrald: happen

[00:22:16] Chelsey Donn: happen. Right,

[00:22:17] Trey Gerrald: It, it kind of occurs to me. I'm formulating this story now for who I think Reagan is, I feel like it's probably someone who has an affinity and some sort of attachment somehow, emotionally, personally, something to the organization.

[00:22:31] Trey Gerrald: I don't think it's necessarily the CEO's wife that's writing the review. Like I don't necessarily think it's planted per se, more so than like wanting to give the park the biggest benefit of the doubt possible.

[00:22:44] Chelsey Donn: Yeah,

[00:22:45] Trey Gerrald: That's how it's occurring to me. So I kind of think they're being truthful, especially playing the ying and the yang when it comes to about comes to like personality of the staff, et cetera.

[00:22:55] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:22:56] Trey Gerrald: But do you think this is gonna

[00:22:57] Chelsey Donn: I thought something else. I just Donn wanna point out one other shady thing that like, again, maybe me, but there was something, a little shady to me about my family. And I decided to get season passes to this water park this year. And I was pleasantly surprised by the experience. That's like one of the first sentences.

[00:23:18] Chelsey Donn: There's something about that, that I'm like, why would you buy a season pass to something before having gone? Like you bought a season pass and then you're surprised that it was a good experience. Wouldn't you be like. We went, we were surprised by the good experience. So we bought a season pass. And if there weren't, if there was like a specific reason, like they were doing this special universal at one point where it was like, if you pay for a day and bring a can of Coke, you could pay $20 extra and come for the whole year.

[00:23:52] Chelsey Donn: Like I Donn know there was like some sort of ridiculous promotion going on. That was incentivizing you. Even if you hadn't been to the park, like it's gonna be worth your while. Even if you think you might come one other time

[00:24:03] Trey Gerrald: Commit

[00:24:03] Trey Gerrald: now.

[00:24:04] Chelsey Donn: this annual pass. But if that were the case for Reagan, I feel like they should have, or would've disclosed.

[00:24:12] Chelsey Donn: Like we bought these, this annual pass. Cause we got a good deal on 'em completely shooting the shot into the dark, not knowing if it was gonna be good and then we're surprised. And then we actually ended up using it a lot. There was something about that sentence of like committing to a full year and then being pleasantly surprised.

[00:24:32] Chelsey Donn: That just put my antenna up.

[00:24:34] Trey Gerrald: no, I can hear where you're coming from with that. Like, I, I get that there. Like, I didn't even read into that or think that, so. Bra BA

[00:24:42] Chelsey Donn: Right. Oh,

[00:24:43] Trey Gerrald: I just, I, I think it could be typical that you would find negative reviews and anticipate it being really bad. And then you go there and it's sort of like, oh, it's really not that bad.

[00:24:53] Trey Gerrald: I mean, you have to weigh, but you know, and like people were generally nice and like the water's cool, but it's gonna be cool. It's like, I can sort of see how that might be a typical experience.

[00:25:02] Chelsey Donn: I just think that, that, like, I can see how that would be a typical experience, but I am a little bit ticked off and I just wanna like point it out that not ticked off, but what's the word I am a little bit. My radar is going a little off with like, whether or not this was a coerced review at very least.

[00:25:25] Chelsey Donn: Right. Because we're St like the first thing we're starting on is that like, I've never written a review before, but I noticed some negative reviews for this water park that seemed to inaccurately describe this family fun filled park. And then, you know, we talk about how we bought the, the year round tickets.

[00:25:44] Chelsey Donn: And then we're pleasantly surprised by the experience like the first, like four sentences of this review. I'm like, I Donn know

[00:25:52] Trey Gerrald: Wait, what is the subject again?

[00:25:54] Chelsey Donn: amazing summer experience for the whole family. Like, it just feels so

[00:25:59] Trey Gerrald: Wait,

[00:26:00] Chelsey Donn: canned

[00:26:01] Trey Gerrald: wait, wait, wait. They say amazing summer experience in the subject. And then by the end of their review, they talk about going at the beginning of the year. Isn't the beginning of the year, winter

[00:26:12] Chelsey Donn: unless this is like only open for the summer month. Let me see where that sentence was.

[00:26:19] Trey Gerrald: but wouldn't you say the beginning of the summer, they're encapsulating this experience as a great summer thing, but then they say go in the off season, the beginning of the year. It's great.

[00:26:31] Chelsey Donn: Oh, you're right.

[00:26:32] Trey Gerrald: that curious

[00:26:33] Chelsey Donn: That is interesting. While at the beginning of the year, some slides were closed personally. I would find it worth it because of less traffic

[00:26:43] Trey Gerrald: wait, but if they haven't been there before and they're talking about being so surprised with how great the season passed was, and they say they've been about a little more than half a dozen times or something since, before writing the review. So when did they get the

[00:26:56] Chelsey Donn: I feel like this there's no, I mean, we can look this up to verify it, but Wisconsin does get cold in the winter and I don't think there's any way. And it is a season pass there. This can't be opened year round. Is it? We gotta verify

[00:27:09] Trey Gerrald: I'm gonna go. I'll look right

[00:27:10] Chelsey Donn: because That's, that would be another suspicious thing then

[00:27:14] Trey Gerrald: Okay. They are open may through September,

[00:27:18] Chelsey Donn: may through September. So they had to been talking about may.

[00:27:22] Trey Gerrald: but would you call may the beginning of the year? Why wouldn't you say the beginning of the season? Maybe they meant to say the beginning of the season.

[00:27:29] Chelsey Donn: They must have. That's what I'm saying. They must have meant to say beginning of the season because it's not opening your round.

[00:27:36] Trey Gerrald: Right. Also, I'm seeing that there's an update right now that says that there's currently 47 rides. I said 40 before. Okay. Okay. So then, all right. So do you think it's humorous? Were you entertained? No. No,

[00:27:52] Chelsey Donn: Oh, no,

[00:27:52] Trey Gerrald: it's pretty, like you said at the beginning, it's pretty, just like, here are the key points moving forward.

[00:27:58] Trey Gerrald: My name's Reagan, my last name starts with F

[00:28:03] Chelsey Donn: I wasn't entertained. Right. Totally. And, and I, and I wanna just, you know, say that there's credit there is value there. I don't think it's a value list. It's for me, it's more about the trust. How much am I trusting Reagan? And, and at very least do I not like that they work at the park necessarily, but are they coerced?

[00:28:23] Chelsey Donn: There's a little bit of, uh, some it's a little suspicious. I think I'm ready to crown

[00:28:29] Trey Gerrald: I think I can crown Reagan as well. Let's do it. Okay.

[00:28:31] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:28:32] Trey Gerrald: So Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards in an effort to be fair and not influence one another. We will simultaneously reveal our ratings.

[00:28:42] VOICEOVER: Queens are Tabulating

[00:28:48] VOICEOVER: chose.

[00:28:49] Chelsey Donn: Three crowns. Okay. So I, I went with two and a half crowns. I was deciding between two and a half and three. Tell me why you decided on three.

[00:28:58] Trey Gerrald: I said three, because I do feel like there is valuable information in here. I see that this could be truthful. I do sort of, no, I'm unsure if I can trust the reviewer's commitment to being generous to the park, which, you know, I guess the whole thing about reviews is they're gonna be biased based on your experience, but it does feel to me that Reagan really wants to champion the park.

[00:29:25] Trey Gerrald: And so for that reason, I felt a little bit. I can't this, this singular review does not erase negative reviews to me, but it does offer more perspective on considerations to be considerate to the park. So that's why I said three, cuz I feel very sort of like, I don't know. I need to read more. Why did you say two and a half?

[00:29:44] Trey Gerrald: ChelseyBD.

[00:29:45] Chelsey Donn: I said two and a half, because for me personally, obviously that's a true middle of the road. No harm, no foul here. I Donn Donn don't think that Reagan is malicious. I don't think Reagan is doing anything necessarily wrong, but I just don't trust Reagan a hundred percent and also. I'm a personality girl.

[00:30:05] Chelsey Donn: I'm realizing more and more as we read through these reviews that I really like being able to trust that this is a unique voice, that this is a, this is a specific person that had an authentic experience. I love when that comes across and that just didn't come across here. So any of my like Piza points, I couldn't really offer those to Reagan.

[00:30:28] Chelsey Donn: I do wanna sort of reserve my additional half crown for after I hear the One-Star-Zinger review. Just to see, maybe I'll, maybe I'll understand where Reagan's coming from a little more when I hear the flip side and I'll understand the need for the argument. So I will hold that half crown for Reagan to possibly bring her or him to a full three crown.

[00:30:52] Chelsey Donn: But that is to be determined

[00:30:54] Trey Gerrald: When did Reagan write this review by the way?

[00:30:56] Chelsey Donn: 20, 21. So last season, I guess

[00:31:00] Trey Gerrald: All right. Well, very interesting. I'm I feel like it's funny, cuz I feel like, um, I was more receptive to Reagan and it was your review.

[00:31:11] Chelsey Donn: In the end. I really took a, I feel like I took a full like water slide,

[00:31:21] Trey Gerrald: Well, you're, you're still on it. You haven't hit the splash yet. Let's see what happens when we come back from our break. All right, we'll take a quick break and then we'll hear a completely different side of this 35 mile per hour ride on the other side of this break. Bye.

[00:31:40] Chelsey Donn: top seed twirly, loopy journey with Reagan. Oh, you're right. Let's see what happens. Can't wait, love it. Bye.

[00:31:43] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown. We'll be right back.

[00:32:11] Trey Gerrald: It's game time, Chelsey. It's time for you to get a dose of your own medicine. Are you ready to play, ride or review? Is it all right? Or is it a review Ty to you? Got it. Tell me right now.

[00:32:32] Chelsey Donn: Oh my goodness. I'm so excited.

[00:32:35] Trey Gerrald: without ChelseyBD knowing.

[00:32:36] Chelsey Donn: really sprung this on me. You guys, I didn't know this was gonna happen, so I'm like nervous and excited. Oh my God.

[00:32:42] Trey Gerrald: Without ChelseyBD knowing I have prepared a game for ChelseyBD and the genre that Chelsey created for our last versus episode. So today Chelsey, we're gonna play ride or review. So I'm gonna, and listeners obviously play along. So I'm going to let, I'm going to say a title. The title is either the name of a ride at an amusement park, or it's the subject title for a review of a product on Amazon. So I will state it. You will hear the timer. It will go give you three beeps and then you'll say ride or review. Are we ready?

[00:33:30] Chelsey Donn: All right. Yes, I'm ready.

[00:33:33] Trey Gerrald: Okay, let's play. Write a review. It's a ride.

[00:33:42] Chelsey Donn: feel like I'm like at the Caribbean?

[00:33:45] Trey Gerrald: It's very tropical. Okay, here we go. Round one. I'll keep tally

[00:33:51] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:33:52] Trey Gerrald: wild one.

[00:33:56] Chelsey Donn: Ooh. I feel like it'd be too obvious for it to be a ride. So I'm gonna say review That's.

[00:34:03] Trey Gerrald: That's incorrect. Correct? That was, that is a ride at six flags.

[00:34:13] Chelsey Donn: I thought it was a ride. Okay. I need to go with instincts. Okay.

[00:34:17] Trey Gerrald: Okay. So American thunder ride or review.

[00:34:25] Chelsey Donn: Oh, no ride.

[00:34:32] Trey Gerrald: Dinging. That's right.

[00:34:34] Chelsey Donn: Oh, God. Thank goodness.

[00:34:35] Trey Gerrald: American thunder is a ride at the six flags of St. Louis.

[00:34:39] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Okay. Got one. All right. Well, at least I'm not a goose egg,

[00:34:44] Trey Gerrald: You're no, goig all

[00:34:46] Trey Gerrald: right.

[00:34:46] Chelsey Donn: what else

[00:34:48] Trey Gerrald: Boulder dash or review.

[00:34:57] Chelsey Donn: review. That's

[00:34:59] Trey Gerrald: That's a ride at lake compounds.

[00:35:03] Chelsey Donn: my, I thought that was maybe a review for bald dash, which is a game that I love

[00:35:11] Trey Gerrald: Okay, here we go. Tornado, exclamation, mark ride or review.

[00:35:24] Chelsey Donn: review.

[00:35:25] Trey Gerrald: Yes, it's a review

[00:35:27] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Okay. Good.

[00:35:28] Trey Gerrald: that is a Amazon five star review for a waterproof wireless speaker. And the review is talking about how it survived a tornado.

[00:35:37] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Good for the speaker.

[00:35:40] Trey Gerrald: okay.

[00:35:41] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Ooh, ride.

[00:35:42] Trey Gerrald: Four ports ride or review. It's a review.

[00:35:53] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay. All

[00:35:54] Trey Gerrald: That's a USB wall charger, Amazon five star review that has four ports.

[00:36:02] Chelsey Donn: okay. I hope that's a review who wouldn't ride

[00:36:03] Trey Gerrald: okay. Mega phobia ride or review. Have you

[00:36:12] Chelsey Donn: that.

[00:36:15] Trey Gerrald: it's a ride. It's for at the Oakwood theme park, which is a theme park in Wales.

[00:36:25] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Okay. I'm not that good at this game. And now I

[00:36:29] Trey Gerrald: It's hard, right? It's hard. Okay. All right, here we go. Faz ride or review. It's

[00:36:40] Chelsey Donn: has review

[00:36:45] Trey Gerrald: a type , it's a typo of a review. It's a typo for a soccer ball. One-Star-Zinger review and the review was deflated ball. So I don't know what felt

[00:36:58] Chelsey Donn: felt has.

[00:36:59] Trey Gerrald: I Donn. Don't know what that's supposed to be flat. Maybe I Donn don't know,

[00:37:03] Chelsey Donn: flat ass.

[00:37:04] Chelsey Donn: flat

[00:37:04] Trey Gerrald: flat ass.

[00:37:05] Chelsey Donn: as flat

[00:37:05] Trey Gerrald: don't know. Okay. Modern warfare ride or review.

[00:37:17] Chelsey Donn: I'm gonna say rye, but I like kind of hope that it's a review for like a laxative

[00:37:23] Trey Gerrald: It is a review,

[00:37:25] Chelsey Donn: what is it for?

[00:37:27] Trey Gerrald: the call of duty black ops, cold war PlayStation. Five game.

[00:37:32] Chelsey Donn: maybe listeners know that, you know?

[00:37:35] Trey Gerrald: Okay. We have two more. Are you

[00:37:36] Chelsey Donn: Okay. I'm ready

[00:37:38] Trey Gerrald: Shivering, timbers ride or review?

[00:37:47] Chelsey Donn: ride. That's

[00:37:48] Trey Gerrald: It's a ride

[00:37:49] Chelsey Donn: oh God.

[00:37:50] Trey Gerrald: it's at Michigan's adventure.

[00:37:52] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Oh, that was good.

[00:37:54] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Your last round on the ride or review the one exclamation mark ride or review.

[00:38:09] Chelsey Donn: Review.

[00:38:11] Trey Gerrald: It's a review for M and Ms.

[00:38:14] Chelsey Donn: I think I got five.

[00:38:16] Trey Gerrald: Oh, wait. There's one more. Wait. There's one more.

[00:38:18] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay.

[00:38:19] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Giant dipper

[00:38:22] Chelsey Donn: Oh my

[00:38:22] Trey Gerrald: or review. It is a ride. I thought maybe you would know

[00:38:30] Chelsey Donn: God.

[00:38:31] Trey Gerrald: it's at the Santa Cruz beach. Boardwalk

[00:38:34] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:38:35] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey. You got six,

[00:38:37] Chelsey Donn: I'm pretty happy with myself. That means that like, I, my, my like ratio, I still got a failing grade, but like not a zero, not a goose egg, not a

[00:38:48] Trey Gerrald: no, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. There were 11. And you got sick. That's pretty

[00:38:54] Chelsey Donn: Okay, good. I'm proud of myself. That was a rush.

[00:38:57] Trey Gerrald: Good job.

[00:38:58] Chelsey Donn: Trey. Wow. You never know listeners when we might pull out a secret new game, just saying.

[00:39:05] Trey Gerrald: Even we might not know.

[00:39:07] Chelsey Donn: Did you beat me? Did you get more than five, more than six, more than seven call in and leave a voice message. 1 8, 5 0 review zero. Let us know how you did.

[00:39:17] Chelsey Donn: Let us know if you beat me. Maybe if you did, I'll send you some merch just saying, call us up,

[00:39:22] Trey Gerrald: And that has been our first edition of his set ride on his, which is it

[00:39:33] Chelsey Donn: which is it.

[00:39:36] VOICEOVER: Review That Review.

[00:39:40] Chelsey Donn: All right. We are back from that browsing game break, that browsing brand new, one of a kind game break that I hope you played along with. And now Trey, Trey. It is your turn to show us the flip side of the argument. So what AV brought for us today?

[00:39:56] Trey Gerrald: Okeydoke. So today I have the for Noah's arc. This is written by user time flies, 37.

[00:40:06] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:40:07] Trey Gerrald: And this was written in August of 2014.

[00:40:11] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay.

[00:40:12] Trey Gerrald: So quite a time gap,

[00:40:13] Chelsey Donn: time flies. 27 47, 30, 37 time flies. 37. Okay.

[00:40:41] Trey Gerrald: more public. We visit my brother in Wisconsin every year and travel all the way from Ontario to do so.

[00:40:49] Trey Gerrald: It's an annual event to attend a water park in the Dells while we are there. This has been going on for over 15 years. Now. We went to Noah's arc last Friday, August 15th. I'm writing to tell you how disappointed we were. We chose not to do the $15 pass at Mount Olympus in favor of Noah's arc, thinking that there would be much less lineups and better access to the park.

[00:41:22] Trey Gerrald: Coupled with the fact that Noah's Ark claims to be the quote largest water park end, we thought we'd be in good hands, one lazy river, one wave pool, the surfing ride and the bumper boats were all closed. There may have been more, but consequently, the spillover to other areas of the park created lineups of over 45 minutes or more.

[00:41:53] Trey Gerrald: If you advertise that you are the largest waterpark end quote, then closing many of the rides slash amenities of the park drastically reduces the options. And therefore the advertising is misleading. I rarely take the time to share concerns, but in this case, it was a dismal day for our whole family parentheses.

[00:42:19] Trey Gerrald: There was 10 of us, sadly, next year, we will likely choose one of the places we have been to in the past and been pleased with. For travelers, I would make sure to ask what attractions are canceled and get the caps, whole truth dash. We only got part of it because they only mentioned two things on the chalkboard at the ticket counter.

[00:42:46] Trey Gerrald: And when I approached someone who worked there, he only told me of three things dash, but there were four. It really does add up respectfully L P I think that, um, time flies, like copy, pasted their

[00:43:08] Chelsey Donn: Initials is LP.

[00:43:11] Trey Gerrald: And they just put it into their review. Hmm. Okay.

[00:43:13] Chelsey Donn: Interesting. Okay. So this is where I was a little bit confused. So you usually go to this place Mount Olympus, and you thought that going to the largest water park in America would be less crowded,

[00:43:30] Trey Gerrald: Yeah,

[00:43:32] Chelsey Donn: like. When we decided to do the idea of having a water park comparison, you know, cuz it's the end of summer, whatever, you know, not end, it's not ending, but you know, because it's it's summer and we thought, okay, waterpark will be fun.

[00:43:46] Chelsey Donn: We both came upon this very quickly. So if it's the largest waterpark are just water park in America and you're visiting anywhere near Wisconsin, this is gonna be the one that comes up. So the fact that you thought that it would be less crowded, did you think it would be less crowded because there's more square footage, but even, but even so no, because more people are gonna go to it because it's the, I mean, if people are gonna go to the largest yarn ball in America, then they're definitely gonna go to the largest water park.

[00:44:20] Trey Gerrald: that's a good point.

[00:44:21] Chelsey Donn: So that was the first thing that I was like, uh, I don't know.

[00:44:24] Trey Gerrald: A quick, Google showed me there's over 20 water parks in Wisconsin. Dells.

[00:44:28] Chelsey Donn: Oh, wow. That's a lot of water parks.

[00:44:31] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I thought

[00:44:32] Chelsey Donn: must just be like water park central.

[00:44:34] Trey Gerrald: it is. Yeah.

[00:44:35] Chelsey Donn: It is right.

[00:44:36] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. It's the largest concentration of indoor and outdoor water parks on earth apparently.

[00:44:42] Chelsey Donn: oh, wow.

[00:44:43] Trey Gerrald: And they are called water park capital of the world.

[00:44:48] Chelsey Donn: That is very interesting. Ooh. Hm.

[00:44:52] Trey Gerrald: it could be conceivable that for 15 years you haven't come across, you haven't chosen this location, but it does seem a little suspicious.

[00:45:01] Chelsey Donn: Well, what's interesting to me in the preface is that it's, I'm like, does it make me trust time flies more? It almost does because it's like, if for 15 years time flies has been like going around to all these different water parks and they sort of know the standards maybe more than I do. Maybe their review does hold more weight cuz they're, you know, haha does hold more water, nice plan, you know, because they are at least presenting as a bit of an expert in the field.

[00:45:35] Trey Gerrald: correct.

[00:45:36] Chelsey Donn: Right.

[00:45:37] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. Also, what do you think of the opening claim about wanting to do it privately, but not wanting to be on the newsletter?

[00:45:46] Chelsey Donn: I mean, I, yes. Like I think that that's annoying and I guess I understand the process, I guess you could unsubscribe, but we all know as I've lodged it as a Complaint, it's very hard to actually unsubscribe. So I do respect the decision to want an opt out. I think it's very weird that there's not an opt out.

[00:46:02] Chelsey Donn: Like I'm, you know, there should be an opt out.

[00:46:04] Trey Gerrald: yeah. I wonder if like that's something from back in 2014, like I Donn don't

[00:46:09] Chelsey Donn: not

[00:46:10] Trey Gerrald: like, how can you not communicate without signing up for the newsletter? Like, do you, you don't think there's a contact, like can't

[00:46:16] Chelsey Donn: Well, I guess the contact, I don't know, like maybe it doesn't let you uncheck it. I Donn know a little strange

[00:46:21] Trey Gerrald: But couldn't you just find like Noah's arc waterpark at Gmail or whatever, you know, I don't know, whatever. It's time flies who cares?

[00:46:29] Chelsey Donn: I mean, yeah. Time flies and has time flies. Do you know how under their name? It says like the number of contributions do, can we see if they've made other contributions?

[00:46:39] Trey Gerrald: They have six contributions. I don't know. And when

[00:46:43] Chelsey Donn: Okay. All right. So I think the time flies made one point that I thought was very interesting that I, I wanted to talk about, which I hadn't thought about, but then after the, after they said it, I, I thought, wow, that's true.

[00:46:58] Chelsey Donn: Can you still call yourself the largest water park in America? If a number of your attractions are closed down.

[00:47:07] Trey Gerrald: All right. So in your review, we discussed some common negative reviews that Reagan F was finding. And I will tell you, I found time flies review on the eighth page of One-Star-Zinger reviews and repeatedly people complained of attractions being closed.

[00:47:30] Chelsey Donn: Hmm.

[00:47:30] Trey Gerrald: So frequent my question is what causes a water ride to close? Maybe someone pees in it or something.

[00:47:39] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I was gonna say pee poop. Someone got hurt. Maybe the there's a, there's something wrong with the slide it's leaking.

[00:47:48] Trey Gerrald: But it is like a very common also I did notice a lot of complaints about cold water

[00:47:54] Chelsey Donn: Right,

[00:47:54] Trey Gerrald: and then people being rude, but that didn't come up more so than like any other type of review. Like I would definitely say parts of the

[00:48:01] Chelsey Donn: do think that's an, I do think that's an interesting point because it's like, you know, every time you go to Disneyland, for example, there's gonna be rides that are closed. It is sort of like par for the course. You just, you kind of just accept it. Like you don't like it. I'm pissed. If like one of my favorite rides is down, it sucks.

[00:48:19] Trey Gerrald: But I don't think of it as like that doesn't occur to me that often, like, I don't know that I've experienced ride closures so much. So as I experienced it, reading through the reviews of this park, like, yes, I've been to Disney and a ride has been closed perhaps, but like, I don't remember seeing that half of the Disneyland was closed.

[00:48:41] Chelsey Donn: Right. And that's what I'm wondering, because this is the largest park and, and the three, four thing was like a little petty. Okay. Two on the sign and then three from the guy, and then it was actually four. All right. Like,

[00:48:53] Trey Gerrald: Okay. Well you say petty, cuz that did occur to me at two ways. Did it, did the, did the other ones break or did they shut them down? After you saw the sign or were they intentionally misleading or yes, that's one side of the argument, but that also did occur to me as like, well, why are they gonna advertise that things are closed down?

[00:49:16] Trey Gerrald: And that will obviously deter people. Maybe they, maybe the park is being shady. And if so, I will want to say, can you guarantee me when I pay and go through the turn style that there will be no surprises and they won't be able to cuz I'm sure things shut down constantly, but they felt duped. Time flies felt like they were intentionally being duped.

[00:49:38] Chelsey Donn: Right. And time flies goes to a lot of water parks, presumably. So they might know what is like normal closures. I just did think that there was a world in which they got to the park. There were two rides down. They were marked on the thing. They went to, someone else had been updated and the sign had been updated that there were three now and then somewhere along the process, another one also was down either way.

[00:50:03] Chelsey Donn: I can understand how that would be annoying. I don't know how many attractions are at this water

[00:50:07] Trey Gerrald: I was just, I was just

[00:50:09] Trey Gerrald: gonna say that

[00:50:10] Chelsey Donn: in the like thrill category, if that's like what? I assume these people, if there were like regular enthusiasts, they probably want the big rides.

[00:50:18] Trey Gerrald: I was just gonna go there because in our background info, there's 40 and now there's 47. So maybe in 2014, I mean, I don't think they probably built 20 more rides in nine years or whatever. Like if is foreclosures out of 47

[00:50:37] Chelsey Donn: Well, I think it, I think it depends on the category because they were so clear to say that they had what, four different categories of rides. So if you figure 40 rides 2014, so it's gotta be 40 or less. So 40 rides. And even if you're just dividing those evenly 10 of those are gonna be like little kid rides.

[00:50:59] Chelsey Donn: So take those out. So that's 30 then like 10 of them are gonna be like less like thrill seeking attractions. So maybe 20 rides are the kind of rides that if you were an enthusiast you'd wanna ride. If four of those 20 rides were gone and you have to wait in line and now the lines are long, like there is a trickle down effect, like I think saying 47 rides, maybe misleading if some of the rides are like Dumbos little drop will.

[00:51:31] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

[00:51:34] Trey Gerrald: but that I do think is the most compelling part of time flies the review. And, and you mentioned it at the top here is like, can you claim that you are the largest if you're constantly in closure mode?

[00:51:46] Chelsey Donn: I think that was a very good point. And I, I was with them. I was not sure if we were dealing with a little bit of a Karen or a Ken, to be honest

[00:51:55] Trey Gerrald: I know.

[00:51:56] Chelsey Donn: the beginning, I was like, Ooh, you seem like you like have a bone to pick, but that point did get me.

[00:52:02] Trey Gerrald: Well, to be fair, I do think within the characterization of who this reviewer is, and am I in alignment with them or am I different? It does occur to me. To me, it might not be a big deal. If four things are closed, cuz I don't do this every year and I'm not going to every water park in the Wisconsin, Dell.

[00:52:19] Trey Gerrald: So to me, I don't care. But if you are someone who has been to all these other ones for 15 years and it's a whole annual tradition, you're looking forward to it. You're from Canada and you're positive or positive. Like it's gonna have a larger impact.

[00:52:35] Chelsey Donn: What did you think about the declaration of a dismal day

[00:52:39] Trey Gerrald: I love that. I love the phrase dismal. I think That's so funny.

[00:52:42] Chelsey Donn: dismal day? I was just thinking in that moment, like what did actually happen? So you waited in line for 45 minutes, spent an entire day riding rise, but didn't get to do these four and that's dismal.

[00:52:57] Trey Gerrald: Right. Wait, I'm just remembering, we talked about this on the podcast, but when we took our nephew to six flags, there were two or three rides that were closed.

[00:53:08] Chelsey Donn: yeah, yeah. Yeah. When you surprised your nephew, you mean?

[00:53:10] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. When we took him and like some of the, you know, there's like, I Donn Donn, I Donn know there's like eight or 12 giant roller coasters and like three or four of them were close.

[00:53:18] Trey Gerrald: And some of them were like the very cool ones that we had looked at YouTube videos on the way. But like, that's not like I didn't even like, remember that I didn't get the opportunity.

[00:53:28] Chelsey Donn: I think what this is getting us to, which I think is a big assessment for us in this review, is, is this common right? Like is time flies, 37, just a part of the audience that is gonna be super bummed. Like if they were at six flags the day that you were there and those rides were closed, would that be a dismal day?

[00:53:48] Chelsey Donn: Maybe it would be. And does everybody go in with that same expectation or. If it's between time flies and Reagan is Reagan the type of person that just really lets things roll off. Like, yeah, there's a couple closures, but whatever. I still got to ride X amount of rides and I still had a great day.

[00:54:10] Chelsey Donn: Whereas time flies is more like, this is something that's gonna ruin. They're not gonna be able to get the fact that the big una ride is closed off their minds long enough to enjoy anything else that's there. And I think that is where we're falling right now is that we have two people whose opinions are both valid, but who are responding to

[00:54:37] Trey Gerrald: The way they relate to these experiences.

[00:54:40] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:54:41] Chelsey Donn: differently.

[00:54:41] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I think that this episode more than any of our other verses is really highlighting different attachments to a waterpark experience.

[00:54:50] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Cuz if you just didn't care and you were just going and you were there for a good time, maybe some of these things wouldn't bother you.

[00:54:58] Trey Gerrald: Well, so time flies, 37th credit here. I think for whatever reason, it doesn't occur as shady to me, it occurs as truthful. And it do like, I do actually trust that they did want to just communicate. Like we were very disappointed. We do this every year. We've been to so many of your competitors. We were really looking forward to this experience and it really disappointed us, like the fact that they preface, like we wanted to communicate the disappointment, not put them on blast, but since I'm not able to do that without being duped into their newsletter, I'm going public.

[00:55:32] Trey Gerrald: Like I, and how they even end with respectfully.

[00:55:36] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:55:37] Trey Gerrald: I mean,

[00:55:38] Chelsey Donn: I think I'm ready to crown time flies.

[00:55:41] Trey Gerrald: The only question I wanna ask though is like, is this humorous or entertaining? Like, I, I, that's kind of missing for me.

[00:55:49] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Not like in an overt way, but I'll get into a little more of that in my crowning. Okay.

[00:55:53] Trey Gerrald: All right, so let's crown. Here we go.

[00:55:56] VOICEOVER: Queens are Tabulating.

[00:56:01] VOICEOVER: Go to.

[00:56:03] Chelsey Donn: Okay. Trey is holding up four crowns. I'm holding up three and a half crowns. I went with three and a half crowns because I know we started to talk about the entertainment thing a little bit. For me, it really is about like, do I feel like this is a real person? Like, can I connect with this and, and feel this is an authentic story.

[00:56:20] Chelsey Donn: And I really feel like that's where time flies pulled ahead for me this episode, because they gave me enough specifics about themselves. They do this, I know who they are for 15 years. They've been doing this and. Really convinced me with their argument about the, can you call it the largest park? So I just feel like there was a little bit more, um, a little more energy and a little more enthusiasm behind this review and personal, you know, this was a personal thing that happened.

[00:56:53] Chelsey Donn: I think it's hard when you get on a soapbox and you're sort of speaking like, you know, attention, I'm the positive review speaking on behalf of all the negative review. Like it's just it's too much. And I did appreciate that. I couldn't go more than the three and a half because I thought it was possible that there would be other people that have lower expectations that could have a fine time.

[00:57:14] Chelsey Donn: And I don't know that this is a One-Star-Zinger park. Uh, I believe that this was a One-Star-Zinger experience for time flies. And why did you go with four Trey?

[00:57:24] Trey Gerrald: so I went with four, honestly. I kind of, for your reasonings, I kind of felt like I understood. The persona of time flies. And I think they were presenting really valid points. And what I thought was unique and interesting, whether I interpreted a different way from you or not was like they, they were told there were three different stories about what was closed and that's frustrating, especially it's seemingly after for the other 15 years of, of going.

[00:57:57] Trey Gerrald: It doesn't seem like they don't you're right. They're not having that experience. And ultimately I'm leaving today's episode. Really curious what causes all of these water park rides to close, because there are, there were, I didn't even wanna mention this cuz it doesn't help us with the specific review I've chosen.

[00:58:17] Trey Gerrald: But some other One-Star-Zinger mentioned, there's only two people working this one ride that has seven slides. That's slowing everything down. So I'm wondering like, is it employment. Right. Why is that such a common note for this waterpark that I think has a lasting impact? For me, it might be a deal breaker for me, honestly, for Noahs Ark.

[00:58:40] Trey Gerrald: So that's why I went with four.

[00:58:41] Chelsey Donn: Fair.

[00:58:42] Trey Gerrald: So now that we've done both of them, are you gonna update your review, your crowning for Reagan?

[00:58:47] Chelsey Donn: I think I'm gonna stick with my two and a half for Reagan.

[00:58:50] Trey Gerrald: I think it's solid.

[00:58:51] Chelsey Donn: I still kind of feel similarly to how I felt before, but I just think the lack of personality and the soap boxiness I is making me upon reflection. Feel like two and a half is appropriate. You didn't do wrong. Reagan. You did. Right, but you're not anything spectacular.

[00:59:10] Chelsey Donn: Sorry.

[00:59:11] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I mean, I think summing up both of them, like what I still gotta know is Ark. Yeah, totally. Who cares? But I'm also not a person. I, I can understand how, if you were like, I'm going to Disney to meet Elsa, and That's so much about that experience. If Elsa calls out sick, that's gonna ruin the experience.

[00:59:30] Trey Gerrald: And I think if you're going to this, Noah's arc to ride that 35 mile an hour ride and it's closed when you're there, that's gonna define your experience. And that's sort of tough. So

[00:59:42] Chelsey Donn: Completely agree.

[00:59:43] Trey Gerrald: it's like going to see, I don't know, wicked and Edina mazel, isn't a consistent performer. And so she called out, then you're gonna be upset cuz you wanted to see Adena men.

[00:59:52] Chelsey Donn: I hate it when I go to a show and that slip is there. I get so like nervous.

[00:59:57] Trey Gerrald: it's tough, so,

[00:59:58] Trey Gerrald: Hmm

[00:59:59] Chelsey Donn: also I feel bad for the person on the slip cuz it's like, Everybody's like, oh no, you know,

[01:00:05] Trey Gerrald: unless you're seeing funny girl,

[01:00:06] Chelsey Donn: that was fun. I en I enjoyed that. I enjoyed that. What did they say, Ted

[01:00:11] Trey Gerrald: hear what I

[01:00:11] Chelsey Donn: Ted on no

[01:00:13] Trey Gerrald: I said, unless you're seeing funny girl,

[01:00:16] Chelsey Donn: too soon. Try.

[01:00:19] Trey Gerrald: then people are happy or they're going specifically

[01:00:22] Chelsey Donn: didn't say it.

[01:00:22] Trey Gerrald: there's a slip anyway. Might cut it. So anyway. All right. Well, my Queen, that was super fun. So now that we're here, I wanna ask you Chelsey, since this is the most Regal portion of our show, I Donn know, is there, like I Donn know anything you would like to induct today for

[01:00:43] VOICEOVER: My Royal Highness!.

[01:00:44] Chelsey Donn: Yes, Trey, there is someone I'd like to induct today. This is a little bit more of a somber induction for me, but I did wanna induct Dr. J Goldberg, who was my OB GYN, who recently passed away. It's very heartbreaking for me. And a lot of people, he was an amazing doctor, kind of a little bit of a celebrity doctor.

[01:01:07] Chelsey Donn: Not that you would know that if you went to him, I went to him for years and didn't realize he was like on an episode of real Housewives, but truly an amazing guy, an amazing doctor who gave so much attention. He performed surgery on me and he passed away very unexpectedly and we are all of his patients left very shocked as well as the staff over at his office as well.

[01:01:30] Chelsey Donn: And. I just wanna say, uh, send a little prayer out for Dr. J Goldberg and hopes that he is in a better place and just sends an extra gratitude to Dr. J Goldberg for getting me through some personal health issues that I've gone through and, and being such an amazing doctor and dedicating his life to the beautiful gift of bringing life into our world.

[01:01:56] Chelsey Donn: And I think that's a real legacy to leave behind. So I wanted to induct Dr. J Goldberg tonight for my Royal Highness.

[01:02:07] Trey Gerrald: Very nice. Yes. Wow. I mean, that is a, I it's like making a Royal Highness out of your Royal Highness is like remembering,

[01:02:15] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. yeah,

[01:02:16] Trey Gerrald: you know, we are all very fortunate to be here right now and honoring everyone who is around us contributing.

[01:02:23] Chelsey Donn: yes. So woo. Sorry for the heaviness, but the cycle,

[01:02:29] Trey Gerrald: I love that. That's a great, that's a great contribution to Royal Highness. I think it's all about honoring, you know,

[01:02:35] Chelsey Donn: All right. Well, I think we learned a lot today.

[01:02:37] Trey Gerrald: but yeah,

[01:02:38] Chelsey Donn: I think neither of us are big water park people.

[01:02:43] Chelsey Donn: I

[01:02:43] Trey Gerrald: don't wanna be in a bathing suit and I don't

[01:02:44] Trey Gerrald: wanna put

[01:02:45] Chelsey Donn: realize that. Yeah.

[01:02:47] Trey Gerrald: All right. My Queen, we did it. That is another round on the, are you a waterpark RQ, Ferris wheel of love life. Laughter sunburns time flies.

[01:02:56] Chelsey Donn: yes. Time does fly. Thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please tell a friend, share it, do it, do it now.

[01:03:06] Trey Gerrald: If you didn't like what you heard, please tell an enemy

[01:03:09] Chelsey Donn: Share it. Do it now.

[01:03:12] Trey Gerrald: that.

[01:03:13] Chelsey Donn: If you like to support the production of our show, visit Review That Review dot com slash donate or even a dollar tip is much appreciated.

[01:03:23] Trey Gerrald: And we are very touched by the people that have been donating. It is not going unnoticed and we appreciate you. You're

[01:03:30] Trey Gerrald: helping us to continue doing our passion project and hopefully it's bringing light to your life. And if you feel that way, please feel inclined to contribute. No

[01:03:40] Trey Gerrald: pressure. Join our mailing list at Review That Review dot com to stay up to date with all of the goings on in the Queen Dom and

[01:03:47] Chelsey Donn: also hit up our voice mailbox. 1 8 50 review, zero love hearing from you. You can follow us on all the socials at the review Queens. I'm at ChelseyBD on C

[01:04:00] Trey Gerrald: I am reachable at Trey Gerrald.

[01:04:03] Chelsey Donn: B, D on today's. That's cute. I like that on today's after show companion podcast, we are rating and reviewing a One-Star-Zinger review for a ceramic diffuser oil diffuser. Well, what is it? What the fuck is it? All right, let's do do it again. Okay. or not? I cursed. It was bad. Okay.

[01:04:34] Chelsey Donn: On today is after show pod. We are rating and reviewing a One-Star-Zinger review from for Viv test ceramic diffuse stone, essential oil diffuser, ultrasonic aromatherapy, diffusers, a hundred milliliters chew on that

[01:04:54] VOICEOVER: It's the.

[01:04:57] Chelsey Donn: to find out what made Trey say holy

[01:05:01] Trey Gerrald: would Lilian pops do up? Lillian pops.

[01:05:06] Chelsey Donn: pops.

[01:05:07] Trey Gerrald: Well, that's our new merch.

[01:05:14] Chelsey Donn: holy pop. No, ignore the haters.

[01:05:20] Trey Gerrald: Lillian pops, karma Lilian pops. And to find out what made Chelsey sound,

[01:05:35] VOICEOVER: Review

[01:05:36] Trey Gerrald: then go ahead all over and join our Patreon page over at Patreon dot com slash Review That Review so that you can hear that special weekly members only after show companion podcast y'all. And remember you are gender non-specific Queen

[01:05:54] Chelsey Donn: You're a Queen. I love how we turn country towards the

[01:05:58] Trey Gerrald: splash splash. I was at the park that was shut down.

[01:06:02] Chelsey Donn: the park. Wasn't shut down just to rides.

[01:06:04] Trey Gerrald: Half of it.

[01:06:06] Chelsey Donn: Bye.

Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.

[01:06:26] Chelsey Donn: right. All right. All right. That was not, I don't know what that was. That was like between, I was

[01:06:31] Trey Gerrald: Bye

[01:06:32] Chelsey Donn: I thought it was Southern and

[01:06:34] Trey Gerrald: Macona.

[01:06:35] Chelsey Donn: yeah, but it was not, I don't

[01:06:37] Trey Gerrald: British.

[01:06:37] Chelsey Donn: yeah, exactly.

[01:06:39] Trey Gerrald: All right.

[01:06:39] Chelsey Donn: alright. All

[01:06:41] Trey Gerrald: All right.

[01:06:42] Chelsey Donn: oh my, oh

[01:06:45] Trey Gerrald: at that, have you ever gotten water in your eye?

[01:06:48] Chelsey Donn: yeah. It's the worst. You mean like stuck in the corner and you're like, Ugh.

[01:06:53] Trey Gerrald: Don't go to a water park,

[01:06:54] Chelsey Donn: Wear goggles.

[01:06:56] Trey Gerrald: Touche.


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