TRANSCRIPT of Episode 70: "Costco Wholesale"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 70: "Costco Wholesale"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: Hello.

[00:00:31] Trey Gerrald: Hi and hello to all of you. Listen, welcome once again to Review That Review, we are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:42] Chelsey Donn: reviews. We're just like Siskel and Ebert only instead of reviewing cinematic masterpiece, we re review those hilarious scathing and sometimes suspicious online reviews.

[00:00:55] Trey Gerrald: that is your host Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:57] Chelsey Donn: And that is your host. Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:59] Trey Gerrald: And together we are your hosts, AKA

[00:01:03] VOICEOVER: review Queens.

[00:01:07] Trey Gerrald: Cheerio to all of our Patreon members. They're helping us wait. That was Australian.

[00:01:12] Chelsey Donn: Yep.

[00:01:15] Trey Gerrald: Well, just so you know, our Patreon members, they're really helping us over here because they are paying a little nominal fee for additional content. And it helps us out when we're producing the show. They get access to our companion after show podcast, and we love them. So if you wanna feel the love, show us love.

[00:01:34] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:01:35] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:01:36] Trey Gerrald: Go to Patreon dot com slash Review That Review. You can also find it at our homepage. Review That Review dot com Chelsey goose. Bagga how are ya?

[00:01:47] Chelsey Donn: I'm? Good. I'm good. We have a handyman outside doing a little bit of work, so hopefully that's not gonna be an issue he's working on the water cooler and a little bit of a leak situation, but.

[00:02:00] Trey Gerrald: little hammer hammer, tap,

[00:02:01] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I think, I think we're gonna be okay. I always hate it when there's a handyman outside my room and I haven't been alerted of that fact.

[00:02:10] Chelsey Donn: And I just have like the curtains open and there's a stranger out there, but more on that at the after show. We could talk about that more there, but anyway, how are you doing Trey? It's so good to see. How's your.

[00:02:24] Trey Gerrald: I'm good. Life is good. You know, as all of our Jewish friends are aware today is yam Kipper. So we are obviously wishing all of our Jewish listeners, uh, safe and, uh, meaningful

[00:02:40] Chelsey Donn: fast

[00:02:41] Trey Gerrald: Yes,

[00:02:42] Chelsey Donn: an easy, fast, let it be easy.

[00:02:44] Trey Gerrald: yes. Or let it be really hard and

[00:02:48] Chelsey Donn: contemplative of.

[00:02:49] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. Consider are you gonna get in the book of life? What could you do better?

[00:02:53] Trey Gerrald: Where have you send.

[00:02:55] Chelsey Donn: You are, if you're, if you're listening to the show, I think we, uh, we're good peeps,

[00:03:00] Trey Gerrald: Yes. So that's enough of that. Let's, let's move on to fun, happy things so that like we can get our minds off of the fast. My week's good. You know, we're, um, chucking along the Jewish holidays are always a great opportunity to be around loved ones, which is so nice. And so lovely. I get to experience that with my large mush Booka.

[00:03:20] Chelsey Donn: Oh, good Yiddish. Look at you.

[00:03:23] Trey Gerrald: Ah, yeah.

[00:03:26] Chelsey Donn: Very good. Very good. Yeah. It's always a good week. I'm in LA. So I'm with my, my Jewish fam out here. Do a little FaceTime with the kids on the east coast and it's, it's a good time. It's a, it's a good time of year. Things are amping up. It's uh, it. I dunno. That's it

[00:04:00] Trey Gerrald: It

[00:04:01] Chelsey Donn: I think we've said it all, but we haven't said it all because we always have things that we wanna complain about as you know, I'm Jewish. I have all the fetches,

[00:04:11] Trey Gerrald: I've got, I've got some too.

[00:04:13] Chelsey Donn: I mean, I think between the two of us, I'm sure there are things that we wanna Lodge Complaint about. So do you wanna jump in Trey?

[00:04:20] Chelsey Donn: Do you wanna start us off?

[00:04:22] Trey Gerrald: I would love

[00:04:23] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:04:24] Trey Gerrald: today, listeners, I really need to

[00:04:28] VOICEOVER: Lodge Complaint.

[00:04:29] Trey Gerrald: against ice cream machines being broken at the fast food drive through.

[00:04:34] Chelsey Donn: Or the UCLA dining hall. I mean, USA.

[00:04:39] Trey Gerrald: Oh, that's right from a few weeks back. Oh yeah.

[00:04:42] Chelsey Donn: forgot already.

[00:04:43] Trey Gerrald: I did, you know, now with my job, sometimes I'm driving home and I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna swing through fast food. I'm a trash person. I grew up trashy. I love fast food. It is something I really love, love, love. I love, and I know there's this whole cultural conversation around the.

[00:05:03] Trey Gerrald: McDonald's ice cream machines are all the McFlurries are always down because they have to clean them and it takes too long. And so they're always down and then there's this whole conspiracy theory, but I don't even know I'm not a big McDonald's person. I don't really partake in McDonald's per se, but I was coming home late from work one night and I did stop at a burger king.

[00:05:23] Trey Gerrald: And, you know, they have seven different like stickers on the windows. And like at the little menu, it's like get an Oreo shake. And I was like, you know what?

[00:05:31] Chelsey Donn: I

[00:05:31] Trey Gerrald: Screw my little body screw nutrition. I want an Oreo shake. So I asked for an Oreo shake. You know what diet screwed machine was down. I hate this. Why?

[00:05:44] Trey Gerrald: Like, like I understand like, oh actually we're out of tomatoes. So none of our burgers are gonna have tomatoes today. Sorry. But like, they would never be like, oh, our French fry machine is down 12 times out of the month. You know what I mean? It's very bizarre that there's just this understanding that like, you may not be able to get the dessert, but they're still gonna advertise

[00:06:05] Chelsey Donn: It's like roulette. Maybe, maybe not.

[00:06:08] Trey Gerrald: Yes.

[00:06:09] Chelsey Donn: and also, I feel like, again, not that like we should ever be ashamed of what we're eating. I'm a full advocate for like you do you girl, and we should all be a little bit more worried about ourselves. However, that moment when you've like decided you're gonna go through the drive through, and that moment when you're like, you know what?

[00:06:29] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I am gonna get the milkshake and then you vocalize it, like you've said it, and then they're like

[00:06:34] Trey Gerrald: no, you're not.

[00:06:35] Chelsey Donn: the machine's down. You're just like, what. What I had to have a whole conversation with myself before I decided to turn in here in the first place. Now it's not available after I've like gone through that whole rigamarole in my head.

[00:06:52] Trey Gerrald: And oftentimes when you're getting late night drive through, you're usually in a long line. I don't know if anyone else has experienced that. So then there's extra buildup. Like, Ooh, I, I want that Oreo shake and then you can't get it. I hate that. And it happens a lot. I think it happens a lot more than it probably should.

[00:07:10] Trey Gerrald: And that's my Complaint.

[00:07:12] Chelsey Donn: Do something about the ice cream machines

[00:07:14] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I Donn Donn. I don't

[00:07:16] Chelsey Donn: think they're really out or like, like broken or do you think they just like run out of ice cream and they're like, well, that's it for ice cream for.

[00:07:23] Trey Gerrald: Well, we're talking about these weird, soft serve things, which isn't even real ice cream. It's like random bags of chemical that

[00:07:29] Chelsey Donn: Right. But maybe they ran out of the chemical bags.

[00:07:32] Trey Gerrald: guess I Donn know there is this whole conspiracy that it's like it it's so involved to clean them, that they just say that they're broken.

[00:07:39] Chelsey Donn: oh. It's like a lie because they Donn don't wanna deal with it. Well,

[00:07:43] Trey Gerrald: one theory. Then there's also a theory that they say that they're broken because it makes people talk about the rest about McDonald's more and more. And so then people like are going, cuz they wanna see if they can get it. Like, you know, it's like people are weird and they have all these conspiracies about nothing.

[00:07:55] Trey Gerrald: But I do like if I go to Wendy's I want a frosty. So give it to me. Don't tell me

[00:08:03] Chelsey Donn: to me, baby

[00:08:05] Trey Gerrald: Or if it's down, be sorry about it. Don't be like, no, it's, you know, it's down. Uh, anyway,

[00:08:12] Chelsey Donn: it's just another day at the,