TRANSCRIPT of Episode 72: "Starbucks 1 vs. 5 Stars"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 72: "Starbucks 1 vs. 5 Stars"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: Hello,

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Well, hello and welcome to Review That Review, the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:39] Chelsey Donn: reviews were just like Cisco Neibert only. Instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing, and sometimes suspicious online reviews,

[00:00:51] Trey Gerrald: that is Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:53] Chelsey Donn: and that is Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:56] Trey Gerrald: And together we are.

[00:00:58] VOICEOVER: The review Queens.

[00:01:02] Chelsey Donn: Cheerio

[00:01:04] Trey Gerrald: to all of our members over on Patreon. They have exclusive access to tons of bonuses, including our companion After show podcast, which celebrates one year today.

[00:01:17] Chelsey Donn: Yay.

[00:01:18] Trey Gerrald: about that. If you're not a Patreon member, you are missing one year's worth of exclusive, extra reviews and content. So if you haven't checked it out, go to our homepage, Review That Review dot com.

[00:01:31] Trey Gerrald: Click on the word Patreon, or if you would like to support our show in a different way, you can visit Review That Review dot com slash donate. Well, hello Chelsey Goose. How are ya?

[00:01:42] Chelsey Donn: I'm good. If you're watching this and not listening, you'll see that I, I have these lights cuz I wanted to be fancy like Trey and I didn't even put my glasses on when we first started recording cuz I was like fully blind. I stared right into the light,

[00:01:56] Trey Gerrald: Oh,

[00:01:56] Chelsey Donn: bad I.

[00:01:57] Trey Gerrald: I know it well.

[00:01:58] Chelsey Donn: And I didn't, I couldn't even see anything until a second ago, so I'm better now that I can see.

[00:02:03] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, these are, what are they? Like 60 wat? L e d lights. So

[00:02:07] Chelsey Donn: very, very bright.

[00:02:08] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. They're exceedingly bright in your eyeballs.

[00:02:11] Chelsey Donn: I don't know how good that is. I mean, I don't think it's as bad as like looking into a solar eclipse, but it can't be great, you know?

[00:02:17] Trey Gerrald: can't be good for, oh my god, Solar eclipses. Remember those glasses they make like out of cardboard or whatever?

[00:02:22] Chelsey Donn: I, Yeah. I don't even know what peop people were like making them from home and looking right in the sun. I gotta be honest, I didn't really look.

[00:02:30] Chelsey Donn: Did you

[00:02:32] Trey Gerrald: No, I didn't look. No. Me.

[00:02:35] Chelsey Donn: do you remember when that was? Like the hot topic, Like that was what we were talking about. That was all pre covid and we didn't even know

[00:02:42] Trey Gerrald: Oh my God. We had no idea what was to come. ChelseyBD, did you get any interesting things on your doorstep? This.

[00:02:50] Chelsey Donn: I did. I got a package, a mysterious package in the mail.

[00:02:55] Trey Gerrald: Oh,

[00:02:56] Chelsey Donn: I think it said like from my fabulous gay cohost, and I was instructed that I was not allowed to open it, which was very tempting. It's, it's quite heavy. I have no idea what it is. It's in a bag.

[00:03:11] Trey Gerrald: Yes. I paid for like the 3 99 gift wrapping.

[00:03:15] Chelsey Donn: Yes. What is it?

[00:03:16] Trey Gerrald: So I sent Chelsey a gift from Amazon. Yeah. What does it say?

[00:03:20] Chelsey Donn: says, Do not open till podcasting with the most adorable, gorgeous, stunning, handsome, wonderful and gay co-host from Trey Gerrald, just in case I didn't like from the clues leading up, just in case I didn't know. I like that. That you said from Trey Gerrald as well.

[00:03:37] Trey Gerrald: Wait, I think that was like auto, like I didn't type from Trey. Gerrald. I think that was like from Trey. Gerrald. Well, Chelsey, so you said it's heavy. Do you have any guesses what could be in there?

[00:03:51] Chelsey Donn: It feels like.

[00:03:54] Trey Gerrald: It's not breakable. If you wanna give it a shake,

[00:03:58] Chelsey Donn: okay. It feels like a bag of beans. Kind of like, like

[00:04:03] Trey Gerrald: bag of beans.

[00:04:04] Chelsey Donn: That's what it feels like. It feels like, you know when you go to the, the farmer's market and they have those like fancy bag of beans that are like the kind that you like soak and bother. If you're like, I Donn know, Trey's not gonna know any of this cuz he doesn't cook at all.

[00:04:18] Chelsey Donn: But instead of buying beans and a can, you can buy like raw beans that you soak yourself and that's like kind of what it feels like. It's quite heavy. A lot of little tiny beads like beads or beans. I don't know. That's my guess. It's heavy

[00:04:33] Trey Gerrald: All right, well, why don't you open at.

[00:04:35] Chelsey Donn: Oh my goodness. Okay. This is so exciting. Am I right? Is it beans?

[00:04:43] Chelsey Donn: Why would you send me beans? Ooh. It's wrapped inside. It has this special. Oh it, wait a minute. Oh my goodness. It's a lot of candy. It's beans. It's jelly beans. Oh my

[00:05:01] Trey Gerrald: I was like, Okay, wait, so hold on before you go into detail. I have it for myself as well. So this is a variety, bro, jelly bean pack. But today, can you guess which one we're gonna discuss? There's four flavors. Don't list them all cuz we're gonna do this on upcoming episodes, but there is

[00:05:21] Chelsey Donn: Well, the first one that I'm seeing, which I imagine is the one that we're gonna discuss cuz it's like somewhat on theme, is Dunking Donuts, jelly beans. Stop. I can't,

[00:05:34] Trey Gerrald: So this is the Duncan. It actually doesn't even say Donn. It just says Duncan Ice coffee flavor, jelly beans.

[00:05:41] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God.

[00:05:43] Trey Gerrald: So this has five different flavors. Of iced coffee. So the first is toasted coconut butter, pecan caramel latte hazelnut and french vanilla.

[00:05:56] Chelsey Donn: Who knew that this existed? How did you even find this?

[00:06:00] Trey Gerrald: Well, I feel like a couple of episodes ago we started talking about how wild flavors were at Dunkin Donuts. Didn't we have a conversation about this?

[00:06:08] Chelsey Donn: Well, I think we were talking about how like sweet, all the drinks were maybe like how it's like coffee and quotations because it's like coffee, but then it's like, so, so sweet.

[00:06:19] Trey Gerrald: yes. And then I was listening to my favorite murder and they bought each other bro's, like Turkey dinner and they tasted them on the show and I was like, Oh, this is so funny. I have to do this with ChelseyBD. So.

[00:06:33] Chelsey Donn: a live review.

[00:06:34] Trey Gerrald: So let's pop open and let's see, like do you see on the front where it tells you like the code?

[00:06:42] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:06:42] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. So are we gonna try, should we try the same one at the same time?

[00:06:47] Trey Gerrald: Yeah.

[00:06:48] Chelsey Donn: just gonna dump a little out on my, my desk.

[00:06:51] Trey Gerrald: Which one did you pull? I pulled an orange.

[00:06:54] Chelsey Donn: I have an orange. Should we try that one?

[00:06:56] Trey Gerrald: Yeah,

[00:06:57] Chelsey Donn: is the caramel latte. That sounds kind of weird for a jelly baba, let's say. Smells sweet. Mm. It's really giving me harm. Latte vibes.

[00:07:11] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. I really taste the caramel.

[00:07:12] Chelsey Donn: Oh wow. That's strong. It kind of reminds me of like, not like the worders candy, but it has like that like Right.

[00:07:21] Trey Gerrald: the caramel. But there's also like, I feel like the after taste is a little coffee.

[00:07:25] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. It ends, It's like one of those worders with like, I'm sure they make a worders with coffee.

[00:07:32] Trey Gerrald: I thought it would be gross,

[00:07:34] Chelsey Donn: I did too, but it wasn't bad. It's like not something I'd want to eat a lot of in terms of like hitting the mark on giving me caramel latte. I think it's like a four outta five.

[00:07:44] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I think so too.

[00:07:46] Chelsey Donn: