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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 73: "Pennhurst Asylum"

Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 73: "Pennhurst Asylum"


*Please Pardon any spelling errors!

THEME SONG: [00:00:00] Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!

[00:00:00] VOICEOVER: [Theme Song]

[00:00:30] Chelsey Donn: hello.

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Well, hello and welcome to Review That Review, the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:38] Chelsey Donn: Reviews we're just like Cisco and Ebert only. Instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing, and sometimes suspicious online reviews,

[00:00:50] Trey Gerrald: that is Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:52] Chelsey Donn: and that is Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:55] Trey Gerrald: And together we are.

[00:00:57] VOICEOVER: The review Queens.

[00:01:01] Trey Gerrald: And a very special cheerio to all of our members over at Patreon who have exclusive access to tons of bonuses, including our very special Companion After show podcast, which features an additional review. So if you haven't checked that out yet, go to our homepage, Review That Review dot com, and click on the word Patreon.

[00:01:23] Trey Gerrald: If you wanna show your support in a different way, then visit Review That Review dot com slash donate. Chelsey. Ooh, do you know it? Today, we're gonna celebrate. Here comes Halloween. It's spooky Chelsey behind you.

[00:01:51] Chelsey Donn: my God. I hate it.

[00:01:53] Trey Gerrald: Happy Halloween Queens. It's another Halloween here at Review. That. Review and Chelsey and I have swapped positions. Well, actually you were dressed as,

[00:02:03] Chelsey Donn: was waldo.

[00:02:05] Trey Gerrald: Walter? Last

[00:02:05] Chelsey Donn: You were in like full drag though.

[00:02:07] Trey Gerrald: I'm wearing a scream shirt, at least

[00:02:09] Chelsey Donn: Oh, nice. I love it.

[00:02:11] Trey Gerrald: I thought I would definitely do drag again for our second Halloween episode, but the recording schedule got away from me, and here we are doing Halloween and Chelsey is an acute crocodile onesie.

[00:02:24] Chelsey Donn: I am, this is like, I don't know when this exactly happened. I wanna say it was like six years ago when I decided that onesies, that was like the level of costume I was comfortable with. You know, it's a, it's an all in one, all inclusive costume, and it's comfortable. Sign me up.

[00:02:41] Trey Gerrald: I get that. I love onesies, Chelsey. How? How are you? How was Halloween? Do you have big Halloween plans this year? Like are you gonna do anything more than a onesie or are you really tapped out?

[00:02:51] Chelsey Donn: I tap out at onesie, but like I also do like a onesies. I don't even wanna call it a party cuz it's usually more of a gathering. We'll have a couple other friends, they'll also wear onesies costumes and we'll watch like hocus po cuz that's about like as horror as I get.

[00:03:07] Trey Gerrald: Got

[00:03:07] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. What about you? Do you have any fun plans?

[00:03:11] Chelsey Donn: I feel like you're more into being fancy and getting dressed up usually.

[00:03:15] Trey Gerrald: very excited. Obviously, Halloween falls on Sunday this year, but I am very excited for our family photo to be released, which still top secret at the time of this recording.

[00:03:29] Chelsey Donn: I thought maybe when we became partners I would get a little like behind the curtain peak at the family costumes, but I have no idea what you guys are gonna do. Do you wanna give a hint? It.

[00:03:39] Trey Gerrald: It's a very famous child story. That's all I'm gonna say.

[00:03:46] Chelsey Donn: Ooh, okay. I'm gonna be thinking about that.

[00:03:48] Trey Gerrald: Hmm.

[00:03:50] Chelsey Donn: Well, I'm not gonna complain about not knowing, but I will complain about other things.

[00:03:54] Trey Gerrald: do it. Why don't we go ahead and,

[00:03:55] VOICEOVER: Lodge Complaint.

[00:03:57] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I wanted a Lodge Complaint about something that I find actually scary in our world today, and that is Shady apps stealing your information.

[00:04:07] Trey Gerrald: Aye. Aye.

[00:04:08] Chelsey Donn: I mean, I didn't know that this was actually a thing, and then all of a sudden it became a trend, I guess, thankfully on. Instagram for people to be like, Look at your settings and make sure you're not like sharing all of your information with everybody.

[00:04:22] Chelsey Donn: And I'm just wondering, what are we doing with this information? It's so cringy. Someone recently slid into our dms at the review Queens. And told us that Chloe, which we reviewed a little while ago, has some shady practices in their apps. They can look at your texts and your emails or something like that.

[00:04:42] Chelsey Donn: I don't know. It's very creepy. Why is this not regulated?

[00:04:46] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, it reminds me of mi like I feel like a couple years ago that happened with that face swap app where it was like the Russians

[00:04:53] Chelsey Donn: yeah.

[00:04:53] Trey Gerrald: like stealing all of our information or something. It is very scary. You would think that they would just be like a common denominator default setting where it's like you can't access information.

[00:05:05] Trey Gerrald: It's, it's very tricky that they just sort of sprinkle that into like when you download it and you approve like their clauses, like the fine print. It's very sneaky.

[00:05:15] Chelsey Donn: It's so sneaky, so creepy. And if anyone has any advice for, I would just like to be able to filter on the iTunes apps for people that don't do stuff like this. Or does it even exist? Is that like a fairy tale wishing upon a star and everybody is just shady? And what are they using the information for?

[00:05:35] Chelsey Donn: Are they just using it for advertising? Cuz that's a little shady. But if they're using it for something scandalous, then that. Very disappointed in Apple and the App store.

[00:05:45] Trey Gerrald: know. Yeah. I'm wondering what they even do with it. I mean, probably, I mean, obviously something nefarious.

[00:05:53] Chelsey Donn: definitely nefarious. Anyway, I'm over it. I had to Lodge a Complaint officially cuz it does scare me and it is Halloween and trick or treat and I've been tricked. that's just what happened. But what about you? Do you have something you wanna Lodge a Complaint about on this Hollows Eve?

[00:06:09] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. You know, I, this occurred to me last night actually, so it feels very fresh, but I really have to Lodge a Complaint against not being able to fall asleep.

[00:06:20] Chelsey Donn: It's on my list.

[00:06:21] Trey Gerrald: It's the worst. I hate it and it like happens to me frequently, and I'm not gonna say it's because I overindulge in coffee, cuz I don't really think that's what it is.

[00:06:31] Chelsey Donn: you do drink a lot of coffee

[00:06:33] Trey Gerrald: I drink a lot of coffee, and there was a point in my life when I did this like diet cleanse and I cut out coffee as a choice and I have never slept better in my life.

[00:06:41] Trey Gerrald: But we're not gonna go there. I'm gonna go

[00:06:43] Chelsey Donn: not gonna blame you.

[00:06:44] Trey Gerrald: No, no, no. We're gonna talk about the mind. I can't turn my mind off when I'm going to Last night I was up until like six in the morning, truly, and I went to bed at like 1:00 AM so it's like five hours going in and out of maybe falling asleep for a few minutes, and then it's like I can't fall asleep.

[00:07:01] Trey Gerrald: And then I'm like, Well, let me scroll through Amazon. And then it's like, I don't need to buy this.

[00:07:05] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I've done that. Yeah. Ugh.

[00:07:07] Trey Gerrald: But then I'm like, I remember my mom would always say like, If you can't fall asleep, just tell yourself like, Oh, I have to get up, like I have to get out of bed. And that will make you feel more tired.

[00:07:16] Chelsey Donn: Oh, that's interesting

[00:07:17] Trey Gerrald: I don't know if she just said that randomly when I was a child.

[00:07:19] Trey Gerrald: It's still in my head. I don't know that that works. It's like also we have the two dogs in the bed with us now and like they're like all wanna be pushing up against me and then like Winnie will start grumbling and

[00:07:30] Chelsey Donn: heat to the equation as

[00:07:32] Trey Gerrald: just like, I can't fall asleep. And then it's like, what do you do? It's like, I don't have milk.

[00:07:36] Trey Gerrald: I'm not gonna go heat up milk. Okay. So, And counting sheep doesn't help me either. It's like I have apps that play music or like, you know,

[00:07:44] Chelsey Donn: I do that.

[00:07:44] Trey Gerrald: But I, it's just frustrating. I wish that I could just be awake when I need to be awake. I feel like I'm tired throughout the day, but then when I'm trying to go to sleep, I'm awake, which is just frustrating.

[00:07:55] Chelsey Donn: That's exactly what I was gonna say. I was gonna say to your mom's point, Why am I exhausted all day? I feel like I could fall asleep standing up and then the second I go to lay down, my brain turns on Very

[00:08:08] Trey Gerrald: I

[00:08:09] Chelsey Donn: That's a Complaint that I've, I've been wanting to Lodge as well and I'm glad you did it cuz we gotta sleep here.

[00:08:15] Chelsey Donn: We're Queens. How are we gonna perform if we can't?

[00:08:19] Trey Gerrald: know, I also feel like I don't wanna be like, I know melatonin is like natural, but I don't wanna be dependent on taking things to go to sleep. Like I wanna just be able to go to sleep. Maybe I should cut out coffee. There's no way I could cut out coffee. That's like no non-starter,

[00:08:33] Chelsey Donn: I just called you honey. I hate that, hun. No, you can't cut out coffee. It's like a part of your identity. But maybe, maybe we can add a melatonin if we had to. I don't know.

[00:08:44] Trey Gerrald: I know. I just don't like it.

[00:08:46] Chelsey Donn: Anyone listening. If you have any recommendations for how to both enjoy your coffee and your sleep, please call in one eight five zero review zero and let us

[00:08:56] Trey Gerrald: I agree. Concur. All right. Well, should we do it? Should we jump into a spooky Halloween review?

[00:09:02] Chelsey Donn: Ooh, I'm ready Ra.

[00:09:04] Trey Gerrald: Let's do it.

[00:09:08] VOICEOVER: Review, That, Review.

[00:09:13] Chelsey Donn: As you know, we are your trustee. Review Queens. We bring in reviews from the internet that we feel need to be inspected.

[00:09:20] Trey Gerrald: We redo the review, break it down, and rate the impact of the review on a scale from zero to five spooky crowns only today. It's a very regal process that we like to call.

[00:09:32] VOICEOVER: Assess that Kvetch.

[00:09:34] Chelsey Donn: with that in mind, what do you have for us today, Trey?

[00:09:42] Trey Gerrald: back.

[00:09:46] Chelsey Donn: Yes. So spooky.

[00:09:51] Trey Gerrald: That was little throwback to one of our, um, after shows. So if you Donn know what we're talking about, you have to join the Patreon. I'm back.

[00:10:01] Chelsey Donn: And if my sister's listening, she is terrified.

[00:10:05] Trey Gerrald: All right, so today in honor of Halloween, I have a one dot Tripad advisor review for a haunted house called Pin Hearst Asylum.

[00:10:21] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay. Pin, like, but you say pin and pin the same. So is it like the writing utensil or the thing you.

[00:10:29] Trey Gerrald: Well, I'm wondering if you know what this is because it's Penn, p e n n.

[00:10:35] Chelsey Donn: Wait, is this the one that I went to when I was a kid in Pennsylvania?

[00:10:38] Trey Gerrald: in Pennsylvania. It's in a place called Spring City.

[00:10:42] Chelsey Donn: Oh no, I don't think so. I went to one in center, in More Center City. Anyway, continue.

[00:10:47] Trey Gerrald: So this is called Pennhurst Asylum. pictures look very scary. It's near, Do you know where Abby Downs is?

[00:10:56] Chelsey Donn: Not.

[00:10:57] Trey Gerrald: Okay, got it. All so this is a, this is written by Kate Lynn, spelled k a t e l y n n.

[00:11:07] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:11:08] Trey Gerrald: This is their one review written on November of 2019. So just keep in mind, this pandemic. Here we go.

[00:11:18] Chelsey Donn: Ha ha.

[00:11:20] Trey Gerrald: I've never been so let down. This place did a complete 180 and only one year in 2018. My wife and I went to the Pennhurst Blackout night, the weekend after Halloween, and it was amazing. It was pitch black and I was scared by every single actor who jumped, touched you, got in your

[00:11:45] Chelsey Donn: Oh my

[00:11:46] Trey Gerrald: pulled you aside, and even gave you sugar pills to swallow. Dash. Dash. We loved it, but this year I was bored. Last year, our biggest group walking through was six This year they grouped us in masses of 15 or more. They only waited 30 seconds for the first 15 plus group to go in before sending in the next. Where after about a minute, you immediately ran into the 15 plus group in front of you who ran into the 15 plus group in front of them until there was a continuous line of 60 plus people all just doda dot shuffling awkwardly through every room.

[00:12:36] Trey Gerrald: There was no spac. actors didn't have time to hide and quote unquote jump out at you because there were no breaks between the thongs of people. They just sort of stood in their rooms and shouted at you parentheses, which considering was probably the best they could do. There was also minimal contact, maybe a tickle or two, but no grabbing, no separating, no sugar pills, nothing.

[00:13:10] Trey Gerrald: And this was every single attraction. I was so bored walking through all three attractions. I wanted to take my phone out and check my Twitter feed, dash dash at least. Getting pulled out for quote unquote breaking the rules would have been more fun than whatever that was. I'm honestly devastated. I had a such a good time last year, but something changed.

[00:13:41] Trey Gerrald: They clearly doesn't care about the experience anymore. They just wanted to hustle through as many people as possible to make a buck. I had an absolutely awful experience and now I have to turn around and tell everybody I'd previously raved to not to waste their time or their money.

[00:14:07] Chelsey Donn: Wow, this is interesting to me. This sort of reminds me of like the spice review, where they're like, I was dying, but I loved it. You know? Do you like haunted houses? Is that something you like?

[00:14:20] Trey Gerrald: Absolutely not. I can, I can't do 'em. I can't do 'em. I cannot do

[00:14:25] Chelsey Donn: Can't do 'em either. I told a story in Patreon, I think last year on this time.

[00:14:30] Chelsey Donn: Why I can't do it and how terrible I like, Don't bring me with you. If you think it's gonna be funny, I might end up like clawing my fingers into your shoulder or something. Cuz I'm so scared, which I did to Francis Schmidt in high school. My apologies. Anyway, this is not the case for Caitlin. Katelin loves this.

[00:14:49] Chelsey Donn: Caitlin, the scarier, the better. The sugar pills, that's a

[00:14:53] Trey Gerrald: Sugar pills?

[00:14:54] Chelsey Donn: of that?

[00:14:56] Trey Gerrald: No. No.

[00:14:58] Chelsey Donn: heard of that. That seems so illegal. You know, I don't know.

[00:15:04] Trey Gerrald: A sugar pill. Can just buy that on Amazon?

[00:15:08] Chelsey Donn: yes, they like do it instead of, I Donn know if you wanna like pretend you're giving someone medicine, but I don't know.

[00:15:14] Trey Gerrald: See, I always thought like, I thought like in theatrical productions, like when people are snorting cocaine or something, like, I thought it was baby aspirin. Oh, maybe you would

[00:15:24] Chelsey Donn: they snort baby aspirin?

[00:15:26] Trey Gerrald: There's a couple of plays where you have to do cocaine on stage, I know that it's baby aspirin. Which obviously you probably, that's probably better for your body than snorting sugar,

[00:15:35] Chelsey Donn: don't think we should snorting like a, like a pixie stick, but I'm just shocked that that's something that is legal. I would just be so afraid that like it, I don't know that somebody really creepy would get in there and like, give me a pill or, I think that the rules of the no touching is like a good thing, but to be fair and non-bias.

[00:15:55] Chelsey Donn: That's not a good thing for Kaitlyn, and that might not be a good thing for a lot of other people that are seeking this out for thrill purposes.

[00:16:04] Trey Gerrald: Well, especially as Caitlin points out, that's what happened literally 365 days ago, like this event. This was known for that.

[00:16:13] Chelsey Donn: Which I think is super interesting because Caitlin is pointing this out amongst I'm sure, a sea of mixed reviews. So if I were somebody that was going, this is why I always tell people Queenly tip, if you're gonna read reviews sort by most recent so that you can see what the experience is gonna be closer to when you're gonna go, because I would imagine that there are reviews.

[00:16:37] Chelsey Donn: With thrill seekers like Caitlin, pre 2000 19, 18, 17, etcetera, that are like, This is amazing. This was the creepiest thing ever. So I think it's kind of cool that Caitlin told us what it used to be and what it is now without really like spoiling the experience. There's like no spoilers, but there are spoilers, but it's also enough information to say if you've been reading other reviews and you're expecting X, Y, Z, don't expect that.

[00:17:07] Chelsey Donn: Which I think is sort of queenly,

[00:17:09] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, I think that's probably the value here is like if you have been to this place in the past, it's changed. And it seems at least Caitlin's reasoning here is that they aren't spacing the hoards of people out, so you're having less interaction, which to me, as someone who hates

[00:17:28] Chelsey Donn: Is good,

[00:17:29] Trey Gerrald: that would be only way I could get in is if I can be squeezed between people.

[00:17:32] Trey Gerrald: But I can't even, like, I can't even go through the door. Like I, It's hard for me to even wait outside group of people. loud music is scary, The

[00:17:40] Chelsey Donn: All of it. I can barely do Tower of Terror, which is now changed to Guardians the Galaxy, but I can barely do that at Disney,

[00:17:48] Trey Gerrald: Well, of course, well, It also occurs to me being separated. I remember when, I wonder if we talked about this last year, but I remember when I wanna say Be more chill. That's not it. Sleep no more. I remember when sleep No More came to New York and I had heard that you pile into an elevator and it's multi-floor.

[00:18:08] Trey Gerrald: So the person in the elevator will let people out on different floors, but they like, are like, Okay, you're getting off here. And then they close the door. So, Intentionally separating groups. So I was like clinging on to David cuz I was so scared. And that's not even a haunted house. So the idea of being separated is like notorious at this haunted house.

[00:18:29] Trey Gerrald: That's terrifying to me. Terrifying

[00:18:32] Chelsey Donn: interesting about this on the converse then is maybe if I were to take myself outta myself and I'm one of these people that really wants to go and I have a group of friends and there's like one or two people that are not sure about it, maybe I would send them this review to be like, Look, it's not even gonna be that bad.

[00:18:49] Chelsey Donn: There's gonna be like people back to back, like maybe in a weird. Could be a positive for some people if you're a non throw seeker, which is interesting in a one star review, this is definitely an opinion oriented review, but it's sort of an opinion oriented attraction, so I think it works within this scape scope scape,

[00:19:14] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, but I think the reason the opinion is sort of separating from me is because it's based on how it went last year, but I do wanna clarify. They say they went to the blackout night, which was the weekend after

[00:19:29] Chelsey Donn: right.

[00:19:30] Trey Gerrald: so I wonder if that's a different event than whatever Caitlin has attended this year and his writing review for.

[00:19:38] Chelsey Donn: Good slew thing.

[00:19:39] Trey Gerrald: But this was written November 2nd,

[00:19:42] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Maybe it took her two days to get her

[00:19:45] Trey Gerrald: means it wouldn't have been, There's no way that November 2nd is the weekend after. October 31st. So maybe they do a scarier version after Halloween, the weekend after,

[00:19:57] Chelsey Donn: maybe, I mean, I guess it could be the weekend after Halloween if Halloween fell on like a Wednesday, or I mean, if Halloween fell on like a Thursday.

[00:20:04] Trey Gerrald: right? No, I guess you're right.

[00:20:07] Chelsey Donn: I Donn know. That's an interesting point. I didn't, So they didn't specify whether or not this year they went to the same thing or whether or not this year they're just not offering the blackout thing and they offered it before. So that is interesting. Good slew thing. I didn't pick that, pick up on that, but that can make a difference cuz maybe Caitlin went last year on the like scariest version of this and this year on the less scary version. I can imagine how that would be anti climactic. I mean, I think really the only Complaint here that I can see being a universal Complaint, regardless of your propensity towards wanting to be very scared or not, is the crowd aspect. Again, this was written pre. You know, pandemic. So we think of crowds I think differently now than we did then.

[00:20:57] Chelsey Donn: But maybe wanting to know that there are gonna be like hoards of people in there that could be annoying for some people to feel like they're on top of people or to feel like I Donn, DT know. I think nobody likes to go through an experience and see the people that are like going to the, through the experience right before them and right after them.

[00:21:16] Chelsey Donn: Like there's something that really I think takes you out of. If that's what's happening. And so I think that that's a very valid universal Complaint.

[00:21:25] Trey Gerrald: Especially for a haunted house, I feel like if this is a walking tour, even if it's not like,

[00:21:31] Chelsey Donn: Right, That's

[00:21:32] Trey Gerrald: like they are, you go through these little themed areas where like they're gonna jump out at you. So if they don't even have time to reset, that is a huge problem.

[00:21:40] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. I used to do a show in Hollywood that was like a walking tour. Have you heard of Accomplice? They have a few of them in New York and we would be like texting each other all the time. Like, Hold your group, hold your group. If we knew that like the other group was running behind. Cuz you never wanna have that experience, that like bottle Bottleneck

[00:21:58] Trey Gerrald: Bottlenecking. Right.

[00:21:59] Chelsey Donn: that I really feel like has valid Complaint. I do think that Caitlin is being truthful. I don't think that they're being shady, especially because they're returning to the same establishment and they've made it a point that they really were sort of bragging around town about this experience prior to this year.

[00:22:18] Chelsey Donn: If anything, I feel like that's where the emotion comes in, that I really love this thing and now it's not what I thought it was gonna be, but I do think they're being. Honest,

[00:22:28] Trey Gerrald: I agree it, it does read us truthful. To me, the only question I am raising is, Is this a blackout event? Because maybe if everyone is all bottlenecked, but it's in pitch black, then no one's resetting necessarily. They're just like walking around and like preparing to scare you because it's pitch black.

[00:22:48] Trey Gerrald: But I think the whole point here about I'd rather pull cellphone out and check my Twitter so I could at least get kicked out. Like that's how. Extreme. This has been, I mean, as the subject says, from the best to the worst, which I, I do believe, Caitlin, the spelling Grammy hair is pretty fantastic. There's like

[00:23:07] Chelsey Donn: There was one. Yeah.

[00:23:09] Trey Gerrald: and it's not super caps lock, which I think like can happen a lot of times.

[00:23:14] Chelsey Donn: with, yeah, these kind of reviews.

[00:23:16] Trey Gerrald: one stars. Yeah,

[00:23:17] Chelsey Donn: Do we think that there's valuable, newer, unique information here? I mean, I, I guess so. Like with the coming season and what, what to expect, I guess we said that I'm, I'm having trouble deciding whether or not this is a common experience or a fluke. I mean, maybe on this particular day it was more crowded than it usually is.

[00:23:36] Chelsey Donn: Not saying that that's Caitlin's fault, but I don't know if like someone else came the following day if they would have the same experience or not. I, I don't really know, like I can't tell if this is a lemon of an experience and this was just a bad day to go, you know? Or if this to expect.

[00:23:54] Chelsey Donn: That being said, I imagine that this haunted house, especially the Halloween experience, is only offered for a probably pretty short amount of time.

[00:24:05] Trey Gerrald: Well, good question. So I'm looking, So for 2022,

[00:24:09] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:24:09] Trey Gerrald: it literally starts September 24th to November 5th.

[00:24:17] Chelsey Donn: All right. That's a pretty long window, so it is possible. The day that Caitlin went was just like not as organized as it should have been. They let more people in than they should have, or whatever it is.

[00:24:28] Trey Gerrald: I mean, it occurs to me that like, clearly if you go like the weekend of Halloween, it's

[00:24:35] Chelsey Donn: It's gonna be Right.

[00:24:37] Trey Gerrald: And this is posted November 2nd. So,

[00:24:42] Chelsey Donn: So with all likelihood, they did go probably Halloween Day or close there,

[00:24:47] Trey Gerrald: Or the night after

[00:24:48] Chelsey Donn: or the night after. Somewhere near there. Yeah.

[00:24:51] Trey Gerrald: Chelsey, Have you ever been to Halloween Horror Nights or whatever? Like in in la like in the park?

[00:24:59] Chelsey Donn: No,

[00:25:00] Trey Gerrald: Cause that is

[00:25:01] Chelsey Donn: away.

[00:25:02] Trey Gerrald: But like, you know, that's going to be. Saturated with people, cuz it always is. like you have to prepare. It's like we talked about the Ren Fair.

[00:25:11] Trey Gerrald: It's like, you know, this is an

[00:25:13] Chelsey Donn: know what you're getting into,

[00:25:15] Trey Gerrald: everyone is going. You have to like, maybe this isn't necessary, but in my estimation, if I want to do a Halloween haunted hay ride situation, I'm probably not doing that on Halloween. I want to go maybe a little bit earlier so that it's less crowded. I. I don't know. I, I'm learning from this review.

[00:25:36] Trey Gerrald: They have different offerings. Some are blackout, some are not. If it's very crowded, it could impact the experience and that from Caitlin's experience, it was better in the past. So that makes me think maybe it, I don't know if that's fluky or common, but

[00:25:52] Chelsey Donn: I was gonna say.

[00:25:53] Trey Gerrald: high expectations.

[00:25:54] Chelsey Donn: Yes, and I think we kind of have to assume that for this kind of adventure that maybe Caitlin is the common denominator, right? Cuz we're sort of the uncommon denominator in this experience. But I would imagine that most people that are going to something like this or, or looking at the reviews on Trip Advisor for an experience like this, wanna know that they're gonna be freaked out.

[00:26:18] Trey Gerrald: Correct.

[00:26:19] Chelsey Donn: Or that they're not gonna be freaked out because like they have somebody in their group that is really scared. I don't know. But I do think that there's a lot of valuable information here amongst an audience that would probably appreciate that information. Is it humorous?

[00:26:34] Trey Gerrald: Not really. I think the whole take my phone out to get in trouble and thrown out, that's winking at humor. Like they're at least tapping into levity while they're so disappointed, which I think is nice. I appreciate, but I'm not super entertained necessarily, or

[00:26:49] Chelsey Donn: I wonder if, if Kaitlyn is like a Look Lou on Twitter, or she's out there, you know, tweeting away. I kind of feel like she's a look Lou,

[00:26:59] Chelsey Donn: but I just get that impression.

[00:27:03] Trey Gerrald: I think I crave something that is the complete opposite of Caitlin. But that being said, I get Caitlin's point, especially because they had it in the past at facility. So even though I,

[00:27:17] Chelsey Donn: season that.

[00:27:18] Trey Gerrald: entertainment, I get their impact, which hasn't lasting impression on.

[00:27:24] Chelsey Donn: I agree. Like I said, I think regardless of where you fall on the spectrum, if you're a Caitlin or if you're a Trey or Chelsey, you're gonna gather, you know, information and you're gonna be able to make a decision based off this, or very, at least, you know, do what I said and do that, you know, filter by recent and see like, is this.

[00:27:42] Chelsey Donn: In 2022, Is this still the experience that people are disappointed or have things changed? Cause I think that's really the impact, actually, the lasting impact here is that things change that don't expect to have the same experience that you had last year and you know, maybe do a little bit of a closer research to people going around the time you are.

[00:28:04] Chelsey Donn: Because if Caitlin had written this review a year ago, it definitely would've been a five star.

[00:28:09] Trey Gerrald: Now I wanna look up, Okay, I'm gonna look up the date on my calendar. So, okay, this was 2019, right? I just wanna see 2019, October 31st was on a Thursday,

[00:28:21] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm.

[00:28:22] Trey Gerrald: right? So they said the weekend after. Which you're right, that's what you were, That was what you were saying before. If it's on a Thursday, the weekend after Halloween is the weekend, like the second or the third,

[00:28:34] Chelsey Donn: so it sounds like they went around the same time expecting a similar

[00:28:38] Trey Gerrald: sorry, that's 2019.

[00:28:39] Trey Gerrald: But they, Sorry. They went in 2018, which was Wednesday. Halloween was

[00:28:43] Chelsey Donn: Exactly. Exactly,

[00:28:45] Trey Gerrald: So it is basically the same time.

[00:28:48] Chelsey Donn: exactly. It sounds like they went around a similar time expecting a similar experience and they didn't though. It is interesting that they mentioned they, they singled out the blackout night, so they must've known that, known that they weren't going on blackout night this year.

[00:29:01] Trey Gerrald: And I do just wanna clarify for crowning, they mentioned the three attractions at Pennhurst, which is the Pennhurst asylum, the morgue, and the tunnels.

[00:29:13] Chelsey Donn: Okay.

[00:29:14] Trey Gerrald: They're all like haunted walkthroughs. I think I could crown.

[00:29:18] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, I think I can crown Caitlin. I feel like I, I've gathered all the info I need.

[00:29:24] Trey Gerrald: All right, So ChelseyBD and I each have our own set of zero to five creepy crown cards. In an effort to be fair and not influenced by one another, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.

[00:29:41] VOICEOVER: Queens are Tabulating, so to school.

[00:29:49] Chelsey Donn: All right. I am holding up four crowns. Trey, you are holding up four and a half crowns. I will go first. I went with four crowns cuz I wanted to leave a crown's worth of space for people that might have differing opinions than Caitlin. In terms of the thrill of. I don't know, sugar pills or some of these things that sound pretty extreme to me.

[00:30:11] Chelsey Donn: I don't know that, that most people would want someone putting things in their mouth, but maybe they would. I just wanted to leave a little bit of space for people that might be different than Caitlin. That being said, I think a lot of Queen Lee qualities in the review, a lot of information, um, comparing to previous years, like I said, really would make the review.

[00:30:29] Chelsey Donn: The reviewee or the person reading the review, I don't know if that's the right word, but the person reading the review think I better look and see what's the breakdown of what I'm gonna experience this year, because you cannot expect it to be the same after year, after year. And I think that's a pretty queenly tip.

[00:30:46] Chelsey Donn: So for that reason, I went with four crowns for Caitlin. Why did you decide four and a half.

[00:30:50] Trey Gerrald: I hear that, you know, I agree with you. I all like it could very well be a Review Queen. The reason I took half a crown is because I, I do feel like this is mainly very informative. I just am curious about what time they were there, cuz I can't distinguish the Flukey common because perhaps. They were bottlenecked for an hour and a half and they just knew that they would be there until three 30 in the morning if they spaced it out.

[00:31:24] Trey Gerrald: So they were like, Okay, we're gonna be a little bit quicker for the next hour and a half to like get through the hordes of people, which like I do think is on the organization. Like if you are a haunted house, then you have to be able to create some sort of consistency in the experience. I mean, this sounds like they really drop the ball.

[00:31:44] Trey Gerrald: And I don't want the experience that Caitlin wants, but I hear that Caitlin was disappointed and they, you know, that's, that's unfortunate. So I do think that ultimately it's a really strong one star. I went with four and a half, but I, I do feel like I can't distinguish the commonality. So I said four and a half, Kaitlyn.

[00:32:05] Chelsey Donn: Caitlin, you're nearly a Review Queen.

[00:32:08] Trey Gerrald: Have you ever watched those episodes on Ellen where she used to send her cohosts to like, or her staffers to

[00:32:16] Chelsey Donn: yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There was like, I think there was someone that really hated it, and so she would constantly send them into these like horrific experiences to, to like get the scream track.

[00:32:25] Trey Gerrald: that would be me.

[00:32:27] Chelsey Donn: That would be me too. We were, we would both be those people for Ellen

[00:32:31] Trey Gerrald: I would never be able to do it though.

[00:32:32] Chelsey Donn: I couldn't. No, but Caitlin, good for you.

[00:32:36] Chelsey Donn: I guess you have, um, different fight or flight responses than Trey and I do. We get anxious when we just know that we have to sleep. So

[00:32:45] Trey Gerrald: Right.

[00:32:45] Chelsey Donn: we supposed to handle haunted house?

[00:32:49] Trey Gerrald: Oh wow.

[00:32:50] Chelsey Donn: All right, Listeners, do you, do you like haunted houses? Do you agree with Caitlin that you would take a sugar pill and want people to touch you and all that?

[00:32:57] Trey Gerrald: I looked on Pen Hurst's website and you do have to sign a waiver cuz there are those crazy. I actually like know the person tangentially through one of David's friends who created, it's actually called Blackout Haunted Houses. And they were like on ABC News because people were going to the hospital and it's like one of those things

[00:33:18] Chelsey Donn: Because they were getting like that freaked out, like they'd have a heart attack or something.

[00:33:21] Trey Gerrald: Like they, that was a place where they, like, you go in one at a time and they put a bag over your head and they tie you up. It's like those crazy ones where like people don't make it through. Like they, they tap, you have a safe word. It's one of those crazy things and you sign like a liability waiver.

[00:33:39] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Truly amazing that

[00:33:40] Trey Gerrald: Caitlyn should go

[00:33:41] Chelsey Donn: people would pay for. Caitlin should go there. Yeah, Caitlin should do that. Well, thanks Caitlin for sharing your voice for this Halloween episode of Review That Review.

[00:33:53] Trey Gerrald: And we'll talk more about haunted houses on the after show, but in the meantime, ChelseyBD, we have done it. We have reached the most regal portion of our spooky show. ChelseyBD, who are you inducting today for?

[00:34:08] VOICEOVER: My Royal line.

[00:34:10] Chelsey Donn: right, Queens. So for today I would like to nominate Spirit Halloween. Now I'm sure you guys know the store spirit Halloween, right? Duh. I've been going since I was a kid. I think they used to like take over a party city or something cuz they do a lot of times popups just for the season. Phenomenal, right?

[00:34:29] Chelsey Donn: They have great inventory and all of that, but something that you might not know is that Spirit Halloween has been putting the fun in funding since 2007 with their Spirit of Children Charity organization, Spirit of Children funds, local hospitals. At Halloween and all year round through monetary donations, their mission is to make hospitals less scary for kids and their families by supporting Child Life, the hospital department that provides developmental, educational, and therapeutic support for children undergoing medical treatment.

[00:35:04] Chelsey Donn: Since 2007, Spirit of Children has raised over 93 million to provide funding for art, music, aquatic and pet therapy programs, as well as supporting child life salaries. Funding has also helped partner hospitals purchase sensory and educational items. Toys used for distraction during medical procedures and so much more.

[00:35:27] Chelsey Donn: 100% of every dollar donated supports the Child Life Department in over 150 partner hospitals across the United States and Canada. Funds raised by spirit of children would not be possible without the outpouring of support from local communities and vendor partners. If you'd like to join the review Queens and.

[00:35:47] Chelsey Donn: Of spirit of children and help hospitalize children in your local area. You can make a donation at the Nearest Spirit Halloween store Thank you Spirit Halloween for your dedication and commitment to such a worthy cause. It is an honor to induct you as our Royal Highness.

[00:36:07] Trey Gerrald: Wow, that's amazing.

[00:36:10] Chelsey Donn: so I put a little donation to them and honor the review Queens just because I think that they're great and I wanted to support the cause.

[00:36:18] Trey Gerrald: I'm gonna do it too. We'll both do it. I see that in the 2021 Pandemic, they partnered with hospitals. To give costumes and activity, books and crayons and treat bags.

[00:36:32] Chelsey Donn: They did cuz they could, it was like, you know, pandemic and they couldn't do the same kind of interaction, but they still made sure that everyone had a good Halloween. So

[00:36:40] Trey Gerrald: gosh, I never even knew this. $93 million.

[00:36:45] Chelsey Donn: that wild? It's a lot of money.

[00:36:48] Trey Gerrald: Wow.

[00:36:50] Chelsey Donn: Also, what's super interesting is if you donate in the store, they have a purple cowbell that you can ring at checkout and you can, I think you could do hashtag more cowbell if you donate.

[00:37:02] Chelsey Donn: Um, they encourage you to take pictures and spread the word.

[00:37:06] Trey Gerrald: Whoa.

[00:37:06] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:37:07] Trey Gerrald: Oh my God. Chelsey. Great job. I love that.

[00:37:10] Chelsey Donn: Thank you. I was surprised, but I'm very happy that I spent quite a lot of my childhood buying costumes from Spirit. Now I feel even better.

[00:37:19] Trey Gerrald: Well, I love Spirit Halloween. They do always, especially in Manhattan and it's like a random, like, you know, it'll be like a little storefront that closed and somehow it's like, you see like coming soon, Spirit. Oh, it's so funny.

[00:37:30] Chelsey Donn: I know, but it's great. And it's so nice that they, you know, that they support these, these hospitals. And what's really cool to me is that the local factor where if you, you know, go into your local store and you donate well, that money is gonna go to your local hospital and there's something that's really nice about that.

[00:37:49] Trey Gerrald: I agree.

[00:37:50] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. How to, you know, end with something nice and light after that scary review.

[00:37:57] Trey Gerrald: Ooh. Well we did a Queen that is another round on the R in rq, Ferris Wheel of Spooks, and.

[00:38:07] Chelsey Donn: Ooh, thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please tell a friend,

[00:38:17] Trey Gerrald: If you didn't like what you heard, tell an enemy. But if you do not have a friend, if you don't have any enemies, but you would like the chance to be featured on a show, then why don't you go ahead and leave us a review. You can do that on Apple Podcasts, on Spotify, or on Pod Chaser. We have made it super easy with a super cute hyperlink.

[00:38:41] Trey Gerrald: It's love the review Queens. We also have a one click link in our show notes below. It's easy peasy, beautiful, spooky Queen. We would love the review. It helps us get our show out to new listeners. It really goes a long way. Kava girl.

[00:38:58] Chelsey Donn: To support the production of our show, visit Review That Review dot com slash donate, where even a $1 tip is much appreciated.

[00:39:05] Trey Gerrald: Join our mailing list at Review That Review dot com so you can stay up to date with all of the goings on in the Queen.

[00:39:11] Chelsey Donn: Hit up our voice mailbox 1 8 50 review zero. You can also follow us on all the socials at the review Queens. I'm at ChelseyBD.

[00:39:20] Trey Gerrald: And I am at Trey Gerrald.

[00:39:24] Chelsey Donn: Woo. On today's after show pod, we are reviewing tombstone pepperoni original thin crust pizza.

[00:39:38] Trey Gerrald: Oh

[00:39:38] Chelsey Donn: one star review from Um,

[00:39:42] Trey Gerrald: Wait, when you said tombstone, I really got like a little spooked. Like I was like, What? And.

[00:39:50] Chelsey Donn: That's about as creepy as I get, you know,

[00:39:53] Trey Gerrald: Oh, I've never thought about how it's called tombstone. I've never thought about that.

[00:40:00] Chelsey Donn: It's a little creepy.

[00:40:01] Trey Gerrald: What the fuck? Why's it called? Tombstone?

[00:40:06] Chelsey Donn: Very creepy. To find out what made Trey say

[00:40:10] Trey Gerrald: Boobly.

[00:40:12] Chelsey Donn: boo

[00:40:13] Trey Gerrald: What's boobly? What's boobly? And to find out what made ChelseyBD say.

[00:40:20] Chelsey Donn: Why again? Why did they do it again?

[00:40:24] Trey Gerrald: They do

[00:40:25] Chelsey Donn: so unnecessary. I did not hear. Need to hear that? Bitch's neck cracked twice.

[00:40:30] Trey Gerrald: then become a member of our Patreon slash Review That Review. That way you'll get access to hear our weekly after Show companion podcast. Remember

[00:40:42] Chelsey Donn: the haters. You're Queen.

[00:40:44] Trey Gerrald: gender non-specific Queen.

[00:40:46] Chelsey Donn: course. Bye.

[00:40:49] Trey Gerrald: Bye spooky clowns,

Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.

[00:41:17] Trey Gerrald: there was a, um, a Review Queen haunted house, what do you think would be inside it?

[00:41:23] Chelsey Donn: Spiky Crowns,

[00:41:26] Trey Gerrald: riding stones that are spiky.

[00:41:29] Chelsey Donn: Oh, someone that is like such a beautiful Queen that it like is so striking, they could give you a heart attack. Like, oh my god, what a beautiful Queen. Yeah.


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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 159: "Barking - 1 Star Review"

Review That Review with Chelsey & Trey Episode 159: "Barking - 1 Star Review" Transcription *Please pardon any and all spelling errors! [00:00:00] CHELSEY DONN: Goldie? Goldie! No barking, quiet, or y


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