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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 92: "Trader Joe's: 1 vs 5 Stars"



Review That Review with Chelsey Donn & Trey Gerrald
Episode 92: "Trader Joe's: 1 vs 5 Stars"

Transcription


*Please pardon any and all spelling errors!




[00:00:00] THEME SONG: Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!


[00:00:31] Chelsey Donn: Hello,

[00:00:32] Trey Gerrald: Well, hello there and welcome to Review That Review, the podcast dedicated to reviewing

[00:00:39] Chelsey Donn: reviews we're just like Cisco A' only. Instead of reviewing cinematic masterpieces, we rate and review those hilarious, scathing, and sometimes suspicious online reviews,

[00:00:51] Trey Gerrald: that is Chelsey Donn.

[00:00:53] Chelsey Donn: and that is Trey Gerrald.

[00:00:55] Trey Gerrald: But when we come together, we are.

[00:00:58] VOICEOVER: The Review Queen.

[00:01:01] Trey Gerrald: And A' very special

[00:01:03] Chelsey Donn: Cheerio

[00:01:04] Trey Gerrald: to all of our members over on Patreon who have exclusive access to tons of bonuses, including additional reviews on our after show companion podcast. For more info, go to Review That Review dot com slash Patreon. If you wanna support in A' different way, then visit Review That Review dot com slash donate

[00:01:25] Chelsey Donn: or donate either way. Works.

[00:01:27] Trey Gerrald: or donate.

But don't ever be A'. Donate.

[00:01:30] Chelsey Donn: That's

[00:01:30] Trey Gerrald: ChelseyBD. How's your week?

[00:01:32] Chelsey Donn: Good. You know, swimming along, uh, no major com Well, no, 'I shouldn't say no major complaints cuz we all know there are complaints coming, but 'I spent A' little time with A' friend of the pod, Terry Gamble. So whenever 'I see Terry, you know, it's always A'.

Better week. So feeling good. How about you? How's your week going?

[00:01:52] Trey Gerrald: That sounds nice. My week is good. You know, 'I finally shucked off some of the resistance and 'I am seeing A' personal trainer again. So 'I had

[00:02:02] Chelsey Donn: Oh my goodness.

[00:02:04] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, so 'I had my second personal training session today. Cannot move my body, which is fun. And what else? You know, just catching up on, what is it called?

Search party. The last

[00:02:17] Chelsey Donn: nice fun.

[00:02:18] Trey Gerrald: life's good. It got so cold here, but it's A' little bit better now. So I'm happy about that.

[00:02:24] Chelsey Donn: Well, way to work those muscles. Trey 'I. Can't say that 'I. Well, you know, 'I 'I with Watch that Rock Pilates, 'I. Try to, you know, do A' little something, but 'I, respect the hustle. You know that

[00:02:35] Trey Gerrald: Holla.

[00:02:36] Chelsey Donn: Haa

[00:02:37] Trey Gerrald: me.

[00:02:39] Chelsey Donn: Well, have you been working up out any complaints lately?

[00:02:45] Trey Gerrald: 'I definitely have A' Complaint that I'm dealing with constantly and 'I really would love to.

[00:02:48] VOICEOVER: Lodge, A', Complaint.

[00:02:50] Chelsey Donn: Let's do it.

[00:02:51] Trey Gerrald: All right. 'I have A' job where 'I have to have my entire uniform pressed.

[00:02:56] Chelsey Donn: By you or like professionally?

[00:02:59] Trey Gerrald: good question. 'I 'I think everything is supposed to be dry cleaned, but 'I always iron before and 'I drive to work in the uniform.

So 'I recognize that 'I could just be putting everything on A' hangar and then getting dressed at my employment, but that's not happening. So my Complaint is when you have ironed A' shirt and then you sit in your car and you drive in your car and 'I commute to work is 13 minutes. And then 'I get out and my shirt is wrinkly.

'I hate how the car is like bawling up A' piece of paper. It just instantly creates all these random wrinkles.

[00:03:37] Chelsey Donn: seatbelt, the whole thing.

[00:03:39] Trey Gerrald: Yes. Have you ever encountered this where you have to be somewhere like completely put together and looking gorgeous and then like you step out of the car and it's like you've been in

[00:03:48] Chelsey Donn: 'I mean like always 'I feel like you leave the house, you do like the last looks and then you get outta the car and you gotta do A' full. Like talk, talk, pull, pull. You know, all the 'I don't know. That just made me think of that B it game. But you know what 'I mean? Like you gotta like, you gotta do yourself, twist it, pop it, pull it.

But yeah, you gotta make yourself try and look fresh again. 'I did buy 'I. Don't know if it works, but 'I bought 'I left it in my car, like, um, it's like A', Downy Wrinkle release or something like that. 'I haven't tried it yet. Like are they gonna ding you like really hard for it or is it like Okay. And it's just like really annoying.

You

[00:04:25] Trey Gerrald: no. No one has 'I, haven't been scolded. 'I did get scolded for seeing 'I. So we're supposed to be an all black and that includes socks and 'I have black socks, but my socks have A'. Little bit of gray on the heel.

[00:04:39] Chelsey Donn: Stop.

[00:04:40] Trey Gerrald: No gray. It's supposed to be all black. 'I was like okay. Um, but no, no one has said anything about like the car wrinkling.

But it's frustrating to me cuz 'I really do spend A' lot of time ironing. But maybe 'I could try the Downey Wrinkle release. 'I know David has like an emergency kit that he brings like for brides and that is one of the items.

[00:04:58] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. 'I found A' travel size one. So 'I was like, oh, this is perfect. I'll

[00:05:01] Trey Gerrald: Right. Well that's my Complaint. If anyone has any other suggestions besides the Downey wrinkle release, which is A' great idea. Call in one eight fifty review zero Cuz it really 'I is A'

[00:05:11] Chelsey Donn: My only other idea, which 'I, don't know if that's like any less annoying because do you, is your shirt tucked? Because the only other thing, 'I guess, is like you could go in like everything, you know, with like your undershirt and then just like throw on the shirt when you get there, but that's like kind of annoying.

So 'I don't

[00:05:26] Trey Gerrald: Well now it's like freezing winter and so everyone is wearing like loads A' of coats and 'I won't even do that. Cause I'm like, I'm out. I'm like going from the parking lot to the inside. Like it's not

[00:05:38] Chelsey Donn: You'll

[00:05:38] Trey Gerrald: big of A' deal to me.

[00:05:39] Chelsey Donn: Yeah,

[00:05:40] Trey Gerrald: But yeah, no, 'I know 'I 'I know 'I could always just like put the shirt on when 'I get there.

But no. Anyway, that's my Complaint. ChelseyBD. What is your Complaint this week?

[00:05:49] Chelsey Donn: My Complaint is really probably like A' tale as old as time. You go to the store and you have an item in mind that you wanna buy, and then you're like perusing the aisles and you're filling your cart with like all other things because you can't! control yourself. And then you get to the aisle where the thing that you wanted to buy was, and it's sold out.

It's not there. So now not only did 'I like make this trip because 'I wanted to get this particular item, and now 'I can't cross that off the list. But now I've also filled my cart with probably A' bunch of stuff that 'I don't need. But I'm not gonna just turn around and leave now because then it would be A' complete waste of A' trip.

So I'm here and I'm buying this shit and it's annoying, you know?

[00:06:37] Trey Gerrald: Oh yeah. No, I've definitely

[00:06:38] Chelsey Donn: this recently happened to me at A', certain grocery store that might come up later, which 'I love, but 'I do over shop when 'I go there. And there was one item 'I needed and they were like, it's not gonna be back in for like two to three months.

That's A' buzz kill right there. 'I had like A' craving.

[00:06:56] Trey Gerrald: was it A' Food item?

[00:06:57] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:06:58] Trey Gerrald: Oh, 'I. Wonder why,

[00:07:00] Chelsey Donn: You know, there's just so many supply chain issues. So 'I don't blame anybody. It's not like anyone's fault. It's just like 'I went, 'I really wanted this one item. 'I was like super excited about it. Build A' cart with all the other items, you know, not there. So annoying and I'm complaining about it.

[00:07:17] Trey Gerrald: Wait, so what kind of stores are you the most guilty at?

[00:07:20] Chelsey Donn: Good old standby basic is obviously Target. That's the one where you can really do the most damage financially. Cuz it's like you, you know, you went in for 'I, don't know anything really. You could go to Target for anything and then end up in A' whole world of trouble. So 'I think Target is probably the most often 'I mean.

The second is Trader Joe's for me, just because 'I love so many of their products and 'I want it. And when that new product comes out and everybody wants it and then they all just like get rid of it. And then we have A' supply chain issue and we can't get A' back for A'. While it's really upsetting.

[00:07:57] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. It's funny cuz 'I was like, 'I was really imagining in my mind, target.

[00:08:01] Chelsey Donn: Yeah,

[00:08:02] Trey Gerrald: But if 'I, think about it, 'I am someone who will like spur of the moment grab things at grocery stores.

[00:08:08] Chelsey Donn: right.

[00:08:09] Trey Gerrald: Like I've never actually considered that, but like 'I do feel like I'm in sort of A' like optimistic. Oh hmm. When I'm at grocery stores, like if I'm going down an

[00:08:19] Chelsey Donn: Or like you take like one thing for granted, like you wanna make A' recipe and it needs eggs. This happened to me recently cuz there's like an egg shortage. So it's like you get all the ingredients and then some and then they don't have the eggs.

[00:08:32] Trey Gerrald: have you been seeing these targeted ads on YouTube and Instagram? 'I can't remember what it's called cuz it's like, it's like A' word, but it's A'. Bunch of letters that like make the word, but it's not actually how you spell A' word, but it's basically like Postmates, but it's being advertised as when you forget ingredients for A' recipe.

[00:08:52] Chelsey Donn: Oh, I'm sure I'll get advertised it now. 'I don't. 'I don't think I've seen this.

[00:08:56] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. You forgot this one ingredient have it delivered. Which 'I just think is such

[00:09:01] Chelsey Donn: 'I mean it's smart. But then at the same time, don't you think you'd end up spending like A' million dollars for A' Cup of.

[00:09:07] Trey Gerrald: Right? You would've to be paying for all of that. All the fees.

[00:09:09] Chelsey Donn: Right. 'I like to have A' mission and 'I like to complete it. 'I, that's, that's really what it comes down to. 'I hate an uncomplete mission. That seems straightforward.

[00:09:19] Trey Gerrald: No 'I. Hear you.

[00:09:20] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:09:21] Trey Gerrald: Well, why don't we get out of the grocery store and move right on in to the grocery store? How do you feel about that?

[00:09:26] Chelsey Donn: 'I feel great about that. Let's do it.

[00:09:29] Trey Gerrald: ChelseyBD shall we?

[00:09:31] VOICEOVER: Assess, That, Kvetch.

[00:09:33] Chelsey Donn: We shall

[00:09:34] Trey Gerrald: And why don't we go head to head because we have another verses episode

[00:09:39] Chelsey Donn: woo pack my boxing gloves.

[00:09:42] Trey Gerrald: as we have been alluding today, we are gonna cover both A' one-star and A' five star review on the same topic. And today's gorgeous topic is Trader Joe's A'.

[00:09:54] Chelsey Donn: that's right. So I'm so glad 'I have the five star this week, because 'I love Trader Joe's Trey. You have the one star. So to determine who reads first, we gotta flip that quota. 'I think it's my turn to.

[00:10:07] Trey Gerrald: Here we

[00:10:07] Chelsey Donn: 'I 'I. Am going Heads.

[00:10:09] Trey Gerrald: it's Heads 'I. Feel

[00:10:10] Chelsey Donn: Woo.

[00:10:11] Trey Gerrald: first, the last 15,

[00:10:13] Chelsey Donn: Did 'I 'I Don't know. Okay.

[00:10:15] Trey Gerrald: So ChelseyBD will read first, which is very exciting. So we'll start with A' positive and end with the negative. So today as mentioned, we are covering reviews for the American grocery store chain Trader Joe's. And at the time of this recording, trader Joe's has A' hundred and three reviews on Trustpilot, and their average score is 2.9 outta five.

So here's some background info on Trader Joe's. There are currently 569 stores across the United States, and the very first Trader Joe's opened in 1967 by founder Joe is, how would you say this

[00:10:58] Chelsey Donn: Colom

[00:10:59] Trey Gerrald: Cologne?

[00:11:00] Chelsey Donn: Cologne, Joe Colom, Joe.

[00:11:02] Trey Gerrald: Okay, so the founder's name is Joe. Look at that. The company actually began in 1958 under A', different name and concept known as the Pronto Market.

But Joe felt that the original Pronto markets were very much too similar to seven 11, and recognized that there would be really stiff competition. He actually has A' quote, he called seven 11, like the 800 pound gorilla of the world or something. Joe realized he should pivot and noted that there were two trends that were growing in the United States, and he used those trends to inform the merchandising of A' new store concept.

So that first trend was the number of college educated people was rising steadily due in part to the gi. And then the second trend, they started adding these giant jumbo jets into airplanes, like domestic airplanes. And those were set to premiere in 1970. So everyone knew that international travel would be accelerating.

So that just leads to A' culture of better educated and more well-traveled people acquiring tastes that they had trouble satisfying in regular American supermarkets. Right. And then this is interesting to note. In 2004, business Week reported that Trader Joe's quintupled its number of stores between 1990 and 2001 and increased its profits tenfold. And then in 2016, fortune Magazine estimated sales to be $1,750 in merchandise per square foot. Which is more than double the sales generated by competitor Whole Foods,

[00:12:54] Chelsey Donn: Wow.

[00:12:55] Trey Gerrald: which makes Trader Joe's have the distinction of being the highest sales per square foot out of any grocer in the United States of America.

[00:13:06] Chelsey Donn: It's quite A' distinction.

[00:13:07] Trey Gerrald: Pretty and San.

[00:13:08] Chelsey Donn: That's, that's, wow, that's amazing.

[00:13:10] Trey Gerrald: And we did not have Trader Joe's in South Carolina when 'I was growing up, but they do, um, exist there today. So 'I don't know why 'I decided to share that, but 'I wanted to. So with all of that background info,

[00:13:21] Chelsey Donn: Yes,

[00:13:22] Trey Gerrald: 'I think we have more knowledge about Joe Trader Joe's. So let's jump in and let's start with that five star.

[00:13:29] Chelsey Donn: Let's do it.

[00:13:33] VOICEOVER: Of that review.

[00:13:36] Chelsey Donn: All right. So Trey and 'I decided that the world was our oyster this week. So 'I tracked down A', particular Trader Joe's in Fremont, California. So this is A' Yelp review of that particular location. So this is Northern California A' little closer to San Francisco for A' reference. This review was written by Brenda C as you know, it's A' five star review.

Here we go. First, the Yelp reviews averaged 4.5 stars for this particular trader. Joe's come to me at no surprise. I'm actually feeling A' little guilty because sometimes 'I cheat on Joe with his bigger brother Safeway. The one next to Joe kind of kinky 'I know. 'I. Only do it because Safeway has more time for me since he's available 24 hours, which reminds me, 'I went to Safeway late night recently, and they were completely out of milk.

Say what? Swear. That's what he said. But I'm not complaining. I'm grateful. Fremont has that 24 hour gem around. Just find it funny when A' grocery store runs out of milk. All of it before 'I tell you why. 'I love tj. 'I would like to point out that having had A' crazy busy schedule between yesterday and today, 'I wouldn't normally feel compelled enough to write A' review until after I've reco cooperated, usually A' few days thereafter.

My last drop of mental fuel comes from the friendly service and quality experience 'I received on my latest visit an hour ago as 'I scanned twice through the entire store, returning A' third time to the frozen section before checking out 'I wore A' fat smile while walking to my car and while smiling, because 'I thought about why 'I was smiling.

'I realized it was all because of Joe. Then it dawned on me, 'I always leave his place with A' smile. It's so easy to find what I'm looking for here. Joe gives me the perfect amount of. As the saying goes, more isn't always better. For example, 'I was grabbing froyo one night at some small froyo shop and they couldn't decide on A' pink, purple, yellow, or green spoon.

Such unnecessary desires and drama wouldn't have existed in my mind if such choices were nonexistent. Lol, 'I digress again. wide tooth smile emoji. Anyway, Joe consistently keeps his shelves and isles clean and simple, and greets me warmly as 'I. Enter, browse, decide, choose, and check. Turkey burgers, frozen cod filets and tangerine juice are among my favorite TJ items.

Also, their frozen Indian cuisine choices are delicious too. Love the lamb, vue and garlic. Non lastly, A'. Lot of handsome men that work there. 'I blush admitting it, but it's true. Check the place out for yourself for those who are into that sort of thing. Of course, tongue out emoji

[00:17:34] Trey Gerrald: Oh,

[00:17:41] Chelsey Donn: brands.

[00:17:45] Trey Gerrald: did you say Wa

[00:17:46] Chelsey Donn: 'I did.

[00:17:49] Trey Gerrald: Did she abbreviate her name? A' as A'.

[00:17:51] Chelsey Donn: Yeah. Brands,

[00:17:54] Trey Gerrald: B R E N Z.

[00:17:55] Chelsey Donn: should we call her brands?

[00:17:57] Trey Gerrald: Oh, without question. Are you kidding?

[00:18:00] Chelsey Donn: Okay,

[00:18:00] Trey Gerrald: Brynn.

[00:18:01] Chelsey Donn: it's friends.

[00:18:02] Trey Gerrald: 'I. Think Brenda C. 'I. Think the C stands for Lingus cuz she's A'. Horny Motherfucker.

[00:18:07] Chelsey Donn: 'I was just about to say 'I. Think that BRZ is like real horny and I'm not judging 'I get it. But 'I think that BRZ was like 'I don't know, like titillated by her experience at Trader Joe's that she had A' run home and within an hour write this Novella,

[00:18:26] Trey Gerrald: 'I. Think this review is more horny than the she comes first episode.

[00:18:34] Chelsey Donn: It might be, it might be Brent's. Really A' pacs on the heat. And you know, it was definitely A' stylistic choice. There were A', few other reviews that went with this like love letter option. 'I just thought there was A'. Little bit more to pick apart here for brands.

[00:18:50] Trey Gerrald: yeah. Bres really like, comes from A'. Very specific tone. Like, like there's like A', really specific feel throughout, maybe because at the very top Brynn's poses an ethics question.

[00:19:06] Chelsey Donn: yeah.

[00:19:07] Trey Gerrald: incest kinky?

[00:19:09] Chelsey Donn: Because she cheated on Joe. No. Well, it's not really incest, is it?

[00:19:14] Trey Gerrald: the brother.

[00:19:16] Chelsey Donn: cheated on, but she cheated on Joe with his older brother. That's an incest for her. That's just her being A' little, you

[00:19:23] Trey Gerrald: it's incest for her cunt.

[00:19:24] Chelsey Donn: Bronco, , 'I, guess so. 'I never really thought about it that way, but 'I just think

[00:19:30] Trey Gerrald: But is that kinky? Would you consider that A' kink having sex with the same family members?

[00:19:36] Chelsey Donn: for some people.

Sure. Like maybe

[00:19:39] Trey Gerrald: the, this is getting into

[00:19:40] Chelsey Donn: this is,

[00:19:41] Trey Gerrald: but it's um, right at the top of this review, which is so interesting. Okay. Also, full disclosure, I've never been to A' Safeway,

[00:19:49] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Don't think I've been to A' Safeway either.

[00:19:51] Trey Gerrald: but they're 24 hours.

[00:19:53] Chelsey Donn: 24 hour Safeway, 'I wanna say it's like A', more like A' regular grocery store that's supposed to 'I. Think it's like, um, what's that grocery store in Manhattan? You have one around the corner too. 'I think, help me out. No, the one in the city begins with A'.

F 'I. Think Fairway. Thank you.

[00:20:14] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, 'I. Think 'I was like questioning if it was the same thing.

[00:20:16] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Think it's like maybe similar to A' Fairway. Cuz isn't the idea with Fairway or 'I. Remember it used to be in the city that like shopping at Fairway was cheaper than shopping at, um, like food emporium.

[00:20:27] Trey Gerrald: don't know. 'I don't think I've been to A'. Food Emporium

[00:20:30] Chelsey Donn: what Trey, where did you shop? In Manhattan.

[00:20:33] Trey Gerrald: Well, in ChelseyBD there was A'

[00:20:35] Chelsey Donn: Oh, okay.

[00:20:36] Trey Gerrald: so we went there.

[00:20:37] Chelsey Donn: Anyway, the point is 'I think it's like A', slightly cheaper grocery store.

[00:20:41] Trey Gerrald: But on the Upper West Side, A' brand New Trader Joe's opened two blocks away. So 'I always went to the Trader Joe's. And I'm also like hearing, because 'I, remember Trader Joe's was new for me and 'I was like very excited about it. And there is A' whole culture like brands gets into of like. Their own stuff that you sort of have to like learn and like you have to like recognize like especially the plethora of like amazing frozen food and stuff.

And 'I, remember when 'I lived in LA for A' couple of months. 'I went to that Trader Joe's and it was A'. Completely different experience because in Manhattan it's like swarms of people. 'I don't think 'I ever left smiling. It's really, really

[00:21:27] Chelsey Donn: It's very stressful cuz it, well, especially like, it was not like an 'I walked in there so many times with like the intention of shopping and left because it was not an enjoyable experience. You actually had to shop in line. You know, like you, you could only shop the aisles and then the perimeter of the store you shopped while you were literally standing in the line.

[00:21:47] Trey Gerrald: So like for anyone that hasn't shopped in Manhattan at these grocery stores, I'll explain. There's A', smaller square footage because real estate is so expensive and they literally have employees that are holding paddles that are high in the air that say the end of the line is here and it literally loops up and down all of the aisles in the grocery store.

So you can't like

[00:22:10] Chelsey Donn: might as well just get on the line

[00:22:12] Trey Gerrald: you need to get in the line and shop while you're stuck in the line because you can't push your shopping cart through because there's like, you know, the old people that are moving slow as molasses bumped up to the people that are in line. Anyway, that's A' very different experience because when 'I was shopping in West Hollywood, it was the most pleasant, amazing, joyful, empty

[00:22:32] Chelsey Donn: I'll say like that, 'I think that that is an anomaly.

[00:22:35] Trey Gerrald: So, okay, so then that brings me back to something that Bryz was saying, that they circled the store three times.

[00:22:41] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:22:42] Trey Gerrald: How many times do you go up and down the same miles, 'I, 'I? Think if 'I was going three times, I'd be stressed out.

[00:22:48] Chelsey Donn: 'I just think that brands is painting A' picture that I've ha that 'I have experienced myself, where you're just like so sort of euphoric cuz everybody's so nice and how can 'I help you? And there's like lots of space to move around that before you know it, you've like circled the whole store three times cuz you're like, oh, maybe 'I want that.

Or you know, 'I don't know. You're just like 'I think in this like blissful, euphoric, preco state.

[00:23:15] Trey Gerrald: Definitely. For brands,

[00:23:18] Chelsey Donn: but 'I mean obviously. We need to start off right at the top by talking about the fact that BRZ did spend A' lot of real estate and BRZ did call herself out for it. Talking about things that were not Trader Joe's. In this review, we spoke A' lot about Safeway. We have that weird froyo

[00:23:40] Trey Gerrald: Yes.

[00:23:40] Chelsey Donn: moment. What do we think about that in 'I?

'I? Mean 'I. Know this is A' stylized review. We have 14 funny votes, so maybe we're A', little bit more forgiving, you know, in that atmosphere. And also 'I. Gotta point. Actually, 'I, just wanna point out 'I know I'm, I'm maybe about to contradict what 'I just said, but 'I just want to give this to you for context.

A', lot of people in this particular trader, Jew, trader Jews, wow. Trader Joe's Yelp page did talk about this. Safeway, because it's in the same shopping center.

[00:24:15] Trey Gerrald: Right. Well, the Safeway seems, uh, like it's adding value to the comparison. The froyo felt like A' tangent on top of A' tangent, which 'I under 'I understood. And 'I actually agree with. Like, you don't know how overwhelming too many choices are until you're trying to get froyo in this tiny little cup like 'I understand that.

But it has nothing to do with Trader Joe's. It felt that felt obnoxious to.

[00:24:38] Chelsey Donn: right. It felt like we could have understood the metaphor without that example, or maybe with using an example within Trader Joe's itself, like 'I don't need 30 different varieties of tortillas. I'm fine with the three that Trader Joe's is offering.

[00:24:54] Trey Gerrald: Right. And at the top of the review, like when they're talking about Safeway, it started selling up to me like, oh, A' 24 hour grocery store. That seems so much nicer. Like, uh, like 'I was really like idolizing that over Trader Joe's. So 'I felt like brands was leading me off the topic.

[00:25:10] Chelsey Donn: right? Like 'I thought it was A' little odd. Even though 'I understand that the Safeway's in the same shopping center and so it's like an automatic comparison. 'I still thought it was A' little weird that we were focusing so much at the top of the review on the Safeway before we even really got into any of the nitty gritty.

But we're also sort of setting up this whole kind of kinky 'I know thing with A' bigger brother next door. So

[00:25:38] Trey Gerrald: But would you ever, do you think of A' smile as something that you wear?

[00:25:43] Chelsey Donn: You are never fully dressed without A' smile. Sure. 'I. 'I don't, doesn't bother me. Why does it bother you when someone says they're wearing A'? Smile

[00:25:52] Trey Gerrald: No, but it really makes me think in A' deep psychological sense of how 'I think of smiling. Cuz 'I think of smiling as something I'm putting on, but not that I'm wearing A' smile.

[00:26:03] Chelsey Donn: That's 'I. Think that is A' psychological

[00:26:05] Trey Gerrald: Do you hear that distinction though?

[00:26:07] Chelsey Donn: 'I do. Because when you're saying I'm putting, when I'm putting on A' smile, it means I'm smiling in A' way. That's disingenuous. 'I have to put it on. When I'm wearing A' smile, I've become aware of the fact that, oh my God, and I'm smiling, you know, like 'I wasn't doing it on purpose, which 'I think is what Brenda, the A' brands rather, is painting the picture for here.

It's like that moment of like 'I can see it, it feels kind of cinematic. Like I'm, I'm walking back to my car and I'm smiling 'I like, oh, 'I God, I'm smiling. Why am 'I smiling? 'I 'I. Guess I'm smiling cuz of Joe. That's ever happened to you before.

[00:26:44] Trey Gerrald: No, I've never suddenly caught myself smiling. I'm not A' lunatic

[00:26:48] Chelsey Donn: What? 'I A'. A' Lunatic. Cuz 'I have

[00:26:51] Trey Gerrald: 'I. Just think that brands going up and down the aisles for the third fucking time, just smiling, gawking at all of the handsome men that are wearing like stupid aloha like printed shirts. Like she's A' lunatic. She's A' lunatic,

[00:27:05] Chelsey Donn: Stop judging. Brn so hard. Bren just needs to get some, leave her be

[00:27:12] Trey Gerrald: So do you think there's any value, new or unique information and Brynn's account of this? Trader Joe's,

[00:27:18] Chelsey Donn: 'I mean. It's A'. Little bit of fishing, you know, for information which isn't always like the best style. Like you can surmise from this review that the service is really good. We've dropped. We've dropped like the Turkey burgers, the frozen cod filets. The tangerine juice. Tangerine juice is so good. Oh my god.

Have you ever gotten it

[00:27:38] Trey Gerrald: no.

[00:27:39] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God. The tangerine juice A' Trader

[00:27:40] Trey Gerrald: Wait. Have you ever had those sriracha waffle chips?

[00:27:44] Chelsey Donn: No,

[00:27:46] Trey Gerrald: Oh,

[00:27:46] Chelsey Donn: spicy girl though.

[00:27:47] Trey Gerrald: oh my God. ChelseyBD

[00:27:49] Chelsey Donn: Yeah,

[00:27:50] Trey Gerrald: 'I have literally like, I'll take back every Royal Highness I've ever inducted

[00:27:56] Chelsey Donn: Oh my

[00:27:56] Trey Gerrald: Those sriracha waffle chips are literally to die

[00:28:01] Chelsey Donn: are they like waffle fries or like, just like A' waffle potato chip with

[00:28:06] Trey Gerrald: They're just like, that's right. Waffle potato chips. Oh, and 'I. Don't think I've ever had A' bottle of sriracha. Like I'm not A' Tabasco hot sauce person. It is just like, do you like barbecue chips?

[00:28:18] Chelsey Donn: Yes.

[00:28:19] Trey Gerrald: Like 'I, like barbecue chips? Like Yeah, 'I have A'. Positive affinity for them. But like if I'm gonna get chips, 'I just want lays regular potato chips.

Like how? 'I just like vanilla. It's 'I. 'I. Okay. 'I. Feel for lunatic. Brenda Bren's here. Excuse me. Because 'I don't want A' lot of choices when it comes to ice cream or fro you. But I'll tell you when 'I was, and 'I haven't been to Trader Joe's in A' very long time cuz it's not as convenient now. But 'I would get like four or five of those bags of the sriracha chaps because they are so getting good.

And wait. 'I,

[00:28:51] Chelsey Donn: But this is like the point, like even you, you're making fun of friends, but let's talk about it cuz like people do get this passionate about their trade. You just said that you would take away every Royal Highness for this one chip. Right?

[00:29:09] Trey Gerrald: it's the product, not because there's handsome men and I'm sleeping with the brother next door.

[00:29:13] Chelsey Donn: we're treating, this is obviously like somewhat of A' metaphor, right?

Like we're being creative. So we are getting that point across of like, this is the way that people feel about Trader Joe's. Like they are this passionate about it. They will miss an opportunity to do something with their husband to go to Trader Joe's. 'I. People get off from Trader Joe's.

[00:29:41] Trey Gerrald: Look, 'I think brands is gonna get A' High Crown from me, so I'm just ribbing her A' little bit because 'I know she can handle it cuz she's A' lunatic,

[00:29:49] Chelsey Donn: You're right. Friends 'I don't think you're A' Luna Tech, but do think that brands took A'. Lot of artistic license, spent A' lot of time talking about things that were not Trader Joe's 'I do sort of wish that we would've had just A' little bit more real estate about the products or

[00:30:07] Trey Gerrald: Or the service in the store. Besides their looks, what are, what do they actually do to help you? Like, yeah, 'I agree. A'. Little bit

[00:30:13] Chelsey Donn: right. Cuz it's also like, the point is that the reason why you're so happy is because they're so like attentive and kind, which like maybe is brand's love language, you know, so

[00:30:26] Trey Gerrald: horniness

[00:30:27] Chelsey Donn: well. No acts of service.

[00:30:30] Trey Gerrald: service.

[00:30:31] Chelsey Donn: Isn't that A' Love language?

[00:30:33] Trey Gerrald: 'I Don't know. 'I know. Whoever came up with those long of languages is like staunchly, homophobic.

[00:30:38] Chelsey Donn: Oh really?

[00:30:39] Trey Gerrald: That was like revealed later. So I've never read the book, but

[00:30:42] Chelsey Donn: I've never read it either.

[00:30:44] Trey Gerrald: 'I think that brands provides A'. Lot of unique information more so than new or valuable, but 'I, but 'I there 'I, there is A' tone overall that lends me to understanding they're being whimsical because of the, uh, affinity for.

[00:30:59] Chelsey Donn: Correct.

[00:31:01] Trey Gerrald: Spelling, grammar. Were there any s

[00:31:04] Chelsey Donn: there were like, the way that Brent's write, some of her sentences were kind of hard for me to keep track of like we're using and multiple times instead of utilizing A' comma, which can make it A' little more difficult to read. There were A' few times when 'I just thought things could have been worded differently.

'I don't think there were any like, you know, overt spelling errors or anything like that. But 'I do think, you know, brs, she got A' little carried away. A' in moments.

[00:31:38] Trey Gerrald: got A'. Little excited

[00:31:39] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, she got A'. Little, little, uh, yeah. A' little burst of something. Yeah.

[00:31:43] Trey Gerrald: Truthful. Shady, definitely.

[00:31:45] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Think truthful to Brenda. Certainly not shady. It's A'. Five star.

Well, maybe A' little shady towards Safeway.

[00:31:52] Trey Gerrald: No, but 'I don't even think it's shaded A' Safeway, because 'I feel like the impact I'm getting is 'I want to go to A' Safeway, and now I'm suddenly like, oh my God, what would the joys of shopping at A' grocery store at 2:00 AM Be

[00:32:03] Chelsey Donn: You've never had such A' Joy. The joys of shopping at 2:00 AM are amazing. I've done it. Sometimes shopping at like 2:00 AM can be kind of like weird because they're like sometimes unloading trucks and stuff at that time. But it's so quiet. It's so nice.

[00:32:21] Trey Gerrald: just get it all to yourself.

[00:32:23] Chelsey Donn: it's great.

[00:32:24] Trey Gerrald: Do you think this is A' common or fluke? Typical experience

[00:32:27] Chelsey Donn: Definitely for this location. I'll say common. This was not the only love letter 'I mean. 'I had A' really hard time picking out which review 'I wanted to go with cuz there were A'. Lot of thank you, but there were A' lot that were like super passionate in their own. In their own way. So 'I do think this is common.

'I think this is A' really well loved location is what 'I was. 'I looked up like Top Trader Joe's in California and that was how 'I found this Yelp page. So 'I do think this is one of the more beloved stores.

[00:32:58] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. 'I would imagine that the experience is probably going to be similar, but 'I think it was all characterized in A'. Very unusual way

[00:33:08] Chelsey Donn: also think like you don't hear brands that often, you know, it's sort of like an unusual name,

[00:33:14] Trey Gerrald: and the like tongue out emoji is 'I. Don't know that we've ever covered that on the review show

[00:33:20] Chelsey Donn: And it's like the old 'I didn't know how to say it when 'I was reading it, but it's like the old school, like teeth emoji. Yeah. So it's like, yeah, the Big D. Exactly. So like the Teethy grin was

[00:33:33] Trey Gerrald: Wait, when was this written?

[00:33:35] Chelsey Donn: this was written in 2012.

[00:33:37] Trey Gerrald: So that makes sense, right? So alright. Humor entertained totally on

[00:33:42] Chelsey Donn: 'I was entertained. Yes.

[00:33:45] Trey Gerrald: and then impact Deal breaker 'I. Mean 'I. Want to go to A'? Safeway?

[00:33:48] Chelsey Donn: 'I wanna, like 'I would wanna go to this shopping center cuz 'I now know 'I can get it all. Cuz anything 'I can't get A' Trader Joe's 'I can go over to the 24 hour Safeway 'I and get it there.

[00:33:57] Trey Gerrald: All right. 'I. Think 'I can crown this. How do you feel?

[00:34:00] Chelsey Donn: All right. 'I can Crown Brands.

[00:34:03] Trey Gerrald: So ChelseyBD and 'I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards. In an effort to be fair and not influence one another, we will simultaneously reveal our rating.

[00:34:13] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating

to the school.

[00:34:20] Chelsey Donn: Okay, the Queens are unanimous. Four crowns. Four crowns, Trey. Why four Crowns for brands.

[00:34:27] Trey Gerrald: 'I. Literally last second moved it up. I'm really still torn between three and A'. Half and four. 'I feel like three. And A' half is A'. Little too low because 'I do think the impact is exceedingly positive. So 'I went with four, but 'I wouldn't give more crowns because 'I don't. Like 'I wanted brands to center the intention of the review.

A' little bit more into reality and less comedy. Woowoo horny land. But, but 'I, 'I got the impact. 'I get that. This is like someone who is truly singing the praises for the unique reality that Trader Joe's provides. And so for that reason, 'I said four 'I think it has A' large impact. And 'I agree about Froyo.

So that's why 'I said four. Why did you say four?

[00:35:13] Chelsey Donn: Literally ditto. You know, 'I wanted more information about Trader Joe's itself. 'I think 'I Love A' Joke review, jokey review, that also still manages to pack A' Punch with product information. Or like what if 'I really was someone that had never shopped at Trader Joe's? And what? 'I just A' little bit more information about what 'I can expect in the experience outside of this like joke, it almost reminded me, A' little bit of the Mall of America review with like the Barbie sex on the stairs or whatever, where it's like, okay, great, but also like what's at, what's at the Mall of America?

So 'I was sort of left with just wanting A' little more. But 'I always wanna give people high points for being creative. As someone that spends an enormous amount of time in reviews, it's like it can get quite boring. 'I feel like 'I need to reward that. And 'I wanna reward brands accordingly. With Four Crowns, great job brands.

[00:36:08] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. Brands. We hope you, um, score with those handsome men at traders.

[00:36:13] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, 'I. Hope you do. Honestly, 'I. Hope you do. And honestly, maybe 'I need to spend A' little more time hanging out with Trader

[00:36:20] Trey Gerrald: 'I mean. They say that if you wanna get, if you wanna meet A' man, spend time at A' grocery store.

[00:36:25] Chelsey Donn: All right. Well, you know, friends, you just might have inspired me, so

[00:36:29] Trey Gerrald: Nice.

[00:36:30] Chelsey Donn: our baby. B r b,

[00:36:32] Trey Gerrald: Well, we'll take A' break so ChelseyBD can go get horned up at Trader Joe's and then when we come back we can hear the one star review for

[00:36:42] Chelsey Donn: which I'm already dreading.

[00:36:43] Trey Gerrald: okay. You. It's gonna be fun. All right. So we'll be right back.

[00:36:46] Chelsey Donn: B R B.

[00:36:50] VOICEOVER: Hold your crown. We'll be right back. 'I.

[00:37:16] Chelsey Donn: Woo Woo.

[00:37:18] Trey Gerrald: It's game time.

[00:37:20] Chelsey Donn: That's right. It is Game time and Trey 'I have designed A', one of A' kind game for you and our audience today. This game is called United States of Joe.

[00:37:35] Trey Gerrald: Woo.

[00:37:38] Chelsey Donn: It's the United States A' Joe. Yeah. Okay. So what 'I found really interesting and 'I know, you did kind of mention this at the top, 'I was like sort of happy that you went with this angle of it, you know, being an American, so, and all that. So there are seven states that there are no Trader Joe's. The one 'I found the most ironic was Hawaii because they wear Hawaiian shirts.

The entire thing is like, you know, A' nod to Hawaiian culture. And yet guys, no Trader Joe's in Hawaii. Fascinating. No Trader Joe's in North Dakota or South Dakota, Alaska, Wyoming, west Virginian, or Mississippi. So those people are really missing out and that must be why every once in A', while you'll go on Amazon and see like A' Candle from Trader Joe's for like A' million dollars.

It's for those people. So anyway, what I'm gonna do, Trey, there's A' number of states that have the same favorite product. So I'm gonna tell you the number of states that have this favorite product. I'm gonna list the states, and then I'm gonna give you two options of what the favorite product is for these states or state.

Okay? All right. Here we go. First, we have 13 states that have this as A' favorite product. The states are Alabama, Georgia. Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Missouri, Nebraska, North Carolina, Oklahoma, Tennessee, and Virginian. All of those states. The most sold item at Trader Joe's is either sweet chili sauce or Mandarin orange chicken.

[00:39:26] Trey Gerrald: I'm gonna go with Mandarin Orange Chicken. No.

[00:39:31] Chelsey Donn: It is sweet chili sauce, which I've actually never gotten from Trader Joe's and now feel like do 'I need to explore that. All right. Nine states have, this is their favorite product. Arizona, Illinois, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, New Jersey, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Texas.

[00:39:53] Trey Gerrald: Oh,

[00:39:53] Chelsey Donn: All love. Everything but the bagel seasoning or chicken tka masala.

[00:40:04] Trey Gerrald: they're all sort of northern except for Texas, so it makes me think everything. Bagel seasoning.

[00:40:10] Chelsey Donn: Woo. That is correct. Good job, Trey. All right. Next grouping of states. We have five states, Arkansas, Idaho, Nevada, Utah, and Washington

[00:40:24] Trey Gerrald: Hmm.

[00:40:24] Chelsey Donn: is the favorite item. Macaroni, verese or bruschetta sauce.

[00:40:36] Trey Gerrald: Bruschetta. Wait, bruschetta sauce. What does that mean?

[00:40:41] Chelsey Donn: It's bruschetta sauce is like,

[00:40:43] Trey Gerrald: Like the tomato stuff

[00:40:44] Chelsey Donn: it's like tomatoes cut up with like garlic and no mint, garlic, and oil.

[00:40:51] Trey Gerrald: on A' little toast thing.

[00:40:53] Chelsey Donn: Yeah.

[00:40:53] Trey Gerrald: So what is the

[00:40:54] Chelsey Donn: Guess you could.

[00:40:55] Trey Gerrald: The tomato stuff. Oh, okay. Okay.

[00:40:59] Chelsey Donn: So is it the macaroni, vais, or

[00:41:03] Trey Gerrald: is.

[00:41:04] Chelsey Donn: It's A' variety. Pack of Macaronis.

[00:41:07] Trey Gerrald: That macarons?

[00:41:09] Chelsey Donn: You think it's Macaronis? That's correct. Woo. Good job. California stands on their own with this particular favorite Is California's favorite, the unexpected cheddar or vegan Thai green curry.

[00:41:30] Trey Gerrald: Well, I'm obviously thinking everyone in California is very health conscious, so there might be A' higher per capita of vegans, but I'm wondering if you put that there to trick my little ass. So unexpected Cheddar

[00:41:43] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Put that there to trick you. A' little 'I But that being said, if you've never gotten the unexpected cheddar, get it. It is unexpectedly delicious. It is so good. No, it's real cheddar. It's just like A' finer cheddar cheese, and you're not expecting it to be as delicious

[00:42:03] Trey Gerrald: it is like cheese that you would put like on A'

[00:42:05] Chelsey Donn: It's A' block of cheese. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Good job. Trey. Wait, use deductive reasoning are starting to get to know me.

All right. Two states here. We got Colorado and Oregon. Now, do they love the sublime ice cream sandwiches or the vegan banana bread?

[00:42:30] Trey Gerrald: 'I feel like it's really cold in Colorado, so they might not want ice cream, but I'm sure they eat ice cream. But you said Oregon,

[00:42:37] Chelsey Donn: Oregon, Colorado.

[00:42:39] Trey Gerrald: 'I. Think of like hippie people in Oregon. So I'm gonna say the, what was it? Vegan something? Vegan.

[00:42:45] Chelsey Donn: Vegan banana bread. That is correct. Trey, you are getting very good at this. Good work. Okay. Our next grouping of states, we have two states, Connecticut and Maine is their favorite. Trader Joe's product. Turkey meatballs or chicken cilantro, mini wontons.

[00:43:10] Trey Gerrald: many Turkey meatballs.

[00:43:12] Chelsey Donn: That's correct. They weren't mini, but the Turkey meatballs. Woo. Good job. Okay. Two states here, Delaware, New Mexico as their favorite. The dried chili, spiced mango or kung pow chicken.

[00:43:31] Trey Gerrald: 'I have no idea. chicken.

[00:43:34] Chelsey Donn: You're going kung pow. That is correct. Good job. Trey. Really, very, very good at this game. All right. Two states we have Florida and your home State of South Carolina. So Trey, does your home state love hold the cone mini ice cream cones or ke lime pie?

[00:44:01] Trey Gerrald: This is tricky.

[00:44:02] Chelsey Donn: Mm-hmm.

[00:44:03] Trey Gerrald: I'm gonna say hold the cones. No,

[00:44:07] Chelsey Donn: Sorry. 'I try and it's ke lime pie. But 'I was intentionally trying to trick you cause 'I was like Florida. It's hot. All right. Minnesota is the only state to have this favorite treat from. Trader Joe's is that Treat chocolate lava cake or Donn bananas.

[00:44:29] Trey Gerrald: gone Bananas. Oh, no.

[00:44:32] Chelsey Donn: Sorry. Chocolate Lava cake. Okay. Three states, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, and Vermont. They love frozen Cauliflower. Nochi or Spanta?

[00:44:51] Trey Gerrald: The Nochi. Yoki. Uh oh.

[00:44:54] Chelsey Donn: A'. Spanta 'I know, but that is A' big popular project. 'I was surprised. Alright,

[00:45:00] Trey Gerrald: states. 'I. Just never think about those three states ever.

[00:45:03] Chelsey Donn: 'I know. Well, have you ever thought about Wisconsin?

[00:45:06] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. Yeah. Cheese

[00:45:08] Chelsey Donn: Okay, cuz these are your last two. And 'I feel like you could get A' win out of this. All right. In Wisconsin is their favorite item. The Danish cringle or frozen chocolate croissants.

[00:45:25] Trey Gerrald: What the fuck is A'? Kringle?

[00:45:27] Chelsey Donn: Okay. I'll tell you before you guess. So A' Danish kringle. It's like this humongous. Do you know what A' Danish is like? A' cheese. Danish? Yeah, so it's like A' humongous danish.

[00:45:38] Trey Gerrald: it's gotta be that

[00:45:39] Chelsey Donn: Okay. It is that. Good job Everybody says it's like amazing

[00:45:44] Trey Gerrald: Kringle. That's such A'. Weird, gross word. Kringle.

[00:45:47] Chelsey Donn: 'I know. All right, your last item is from the District of Columbia DC where Biden currently resides . So is DC's favorite item chili and lime rolled corn tortilla chips or baba peanut snacks.

[00:46:12] Trey Gerrald: Well, 'I do think everyone in DC's on the go, so I'm thinking like peanut snacks might be popular, but 'I know everyone loves tortilla chips. I'm gonna say the lime tortilla chippy things.

[00:46:23] Chelsey Donn: Sorry, try it was the Bomba snacks. You shouldn't have second guessed yourself. That's it. That's A' trip around the United States. A' Joe. Try 'I. Feel like you did still do pretty well, even though you got some wrong 'I. Think you got more. There were 13 total guesses. So how many did you get, right?

[00:46:40] Trey Gerrald: well 'I only tallied 12, but, but 'I have more, right? So even with missing one, 'I

[00:46:46] Chelsey Donn: Oh, you're right. Wait, it is 12

[00:46:48] Trey Gerrald: oh, okay.

[00:46:48] Chelsey Donn: because the first, the first page is A' title

[00:46:51] Trey Gerrald: 'I won.

[00:46:52] Chelsey Donn: Woo. How many did you get? Right?

[00:46:54] Trey Gerrald: Seven. Yay.

[00:46:57] Chelsey Donn: Trey. Good work,

[00:46:59] Trey Gerrald: Well, 'I just feel like 'I am much closer to my nation than I've ever been. Vote for me for President 2024.

[00:47:09] VOICEOVER: Review, That, Review.

[00:47:12] Chelsey Donn: All right, we are back from that rousing game break around the nation and it is your turn. Trey. Let's hear it. That one star review. I've been dreading this moment, but I'm ready.

[00:47:24] Trey Gerrald: All right. So, yes, today 'I had the privilege of sourcing our one star review for today. So 'I went to Better Business Bureau and 'I found this Onestar from A', person named Brian, b r y, A', n

[00:47:38] Chelsey Donn: Brenda and Brian. Brian Brands.

[00:47:42] Trey Gerrald: All right, so this is actually for A', another store in California, Monrovia, California, which is where their headquarters are located.

And this is Brian's one star Better Business Bureau Review for Trader Joe's this morning. As 'I do every week, 'I drove A' long way to this Trader Joe's for flowers, parentheses, gladiolas only for the past few months. This store, it's cutting down the amount of flowers and quantity, and they have raised the price from 5 99 to 7 99 this morning, the gladiolas were heading for dead.

They were all leaned over and the very tops of them were suffering like they would after owning them an A' vase for two weeks and caring for them properly. 'I saw they were not in water exclamation. Mark 'I requested the manager named. and then A'. Better Business Bureau like removes these names. So it just says four asterisks space, four asterisks.

He has worked there for the whole time. I've gone to this location, parenthesis two years. He has never smiled. He doesn't say thank you. He always looks unhappy as he barely stares over his manager station in front. It was made very clear today how little he cares. When he finally came out from the back, he helped one of his cashiers while 'I continued to wait.

Then he came over and said, yeah, how can 'I help you? 'I showed him the bad condition of the flowers that they are not in water, and 'I explained that 'I come A'. Long way to get there. He said, yeah, we don't put 'em in water so they won't bloom Really. 'I said they had been in water in the past, and thus 'I have always needed to use the plastic liners that they provide in the floral section.

He said, I'll have to ask the person who takes care of the flowers da da dot, and then shouted to A' cashier as to whether they put them in water or not. She yelled back, we don't put them in water so they won't bloom. 'I said that the flowers are close to dead because they are caps not in water. Just then manager's name that's hidden an asterisks cuts me off as if to avoid others hearing our conversation.

And he said, well, that's all we have. And he walked away. Not one single, I'm sorry, not one single. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. He is simply A', self-centered, rude person who has no qualms about acting this way in front of his employees, thus teaching them rude Kurt, an unprofessional behavior right from him.

Manager's name, that's asterisk out. Question mark. Bad exclamation. Mark.

[00:51:06] Chelsey Donn: Manager Bad.

[00:51:08] VOICEOVER: Oh my God, it's A'.

[00:51:10] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, 'I. Mean. A'. Little bit of A' caring Bri. Okay, so. 'I don't want to condone poor customer service. 'I am surprised that there was poor customer service at Trader Joe's because 'I know that's such A' high priority of

[00:51:28] Trey Gerrald: correct,

[00:51:29] Chelsey Donn: this is A' little bit shocking and I'll give Brian that, but 'I don't know why 'I am like getting A' vibe that Brian was like coming in very hot with A' manager and 'I feel like maybe Brian was having A' transference experience with A' manager and he like reminded him of someone else.

Cuz he's making all these like very personal attacks, like, uh, that he's self-centered, that he's really, you don't really know him out. 'I don't think you can like say that someone is self-centered because they're like, sorry, we don't put them in water because they bloom. And then you're like, yeah, you do.

And then you know, like 'I don't know. 'I just don't think that self-centered is really the right expression. 'I think that. If you don't like the way that, like what do you want them to do at that point? Like, if you don't like the way the flowers look, well then don't buy them. You know, like 'I can understand that you're annoyed because you went there and the manager probably w you know, should have said so sorry 'I.

Wish the quality was better. We're getting A' new shipment of flowers tomorrow or what. You know, there was like other ways that the manager could have handled it certainly. But Brian is kind of blowing this A' little bit out of proportion.

[00:52:39] Trey Gerrald: How old do you think Brian is?

[00:52:40] Chelsey Donn: You know what's funny is 'I feel it. 'I get like older man vibes from Brian, but then 'I feel like Brian is not an old man name.

[00:52:47] Trey Gerrald: Right, because 'I definitely have A' sense that this is an older gentleman. And I'm also hearing that it does feel like Brian's coming from stuff because at the very top they're referencing, it's out of their way, the stock is, is becoming smaller, they've increased the price, and now they seem to think that they've changed something.

So it does seem like there's A', lot of psychological stuff going on here when we're just trying to get flowers from A' grocery store.

[00:53:17] Chelsey Donn: Right 'I feel like I've gone to grocery store 'I mean like my Complaint today was going to A' grocery store and them not having the product that 'I wanted. Like even though that happened to me at Trader Joe's this past week, I'm not gonna not shop A' Trader Joe's because they didn't have the product that 'I wanted.

You know what 'I mean? Like 'I was annoyed that 'I went all the way there for this one thing and they didn't have it. But I'm not gonna be like, I'm never gonna go back there

[00:53:41] Trey Gerrald: 'I mean is that even A' real strategy? 'I guess it probably is because 'I, when I'm picking out flowers, 'I try to get the one that's the least bloomed. So I've never thought about that.

[00:53:51] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, 'I was gonna ask you about that. Like maybe they soak them in water, but they're not gonna like leave them sitting in water. It's not the craziest thing I've ever heard.

[00:54:00] Trey Gerrald: Also, Brian mentioning these plastic liners like 'I know exactly what he's talking

[00:54:05] Chelsey Donn: 'I know exactly what he's talking about too. But for whatever reason, 'I don't remember them having them at Trader Joe's.

[00:54:12] Trey Gerrald: Oh, 'I. 'I definitely

[00:54:13] Chelsey Donn: do. Okay. Okay. All right. So Brian 'I mean like, do we think that Brian is being shady? 'I feel like A' little bit.

[00:54:20] Trey Gerrald: 'I feel A'. Little bit too 'I feel like Brian is upset and throwing it at every aspect. Like they, they wanna mention that they go out of their way to go to this location also. Do you, whose fault do you think it is that the inventory is getting smaller? 'I? Don't think it's the manager. 'I. Think it's based on sales.

[00:54:38] Chelsey Donn: 'I think that Brian is really like personifying the manager as the end all be all for everything that goes on in the store. And 'I just don't think that that's accurate or fair. 'I mean. 'I think the manager should have handled this situation maybe better. You know, maybe not let Brian leave so upset.

Maybe be like A' little bit more understanding. That's where 'I feel like the manager failed. But Brian is really taking this personally also. Like this is on the Trader Joe's page and it's only about the flowers.

[00:55:09] Trey Gerrald: Correct.

[00:55:10] Chelsey Donn: How do we feel about that?

[00:55:11] Trey Gerrald: Well, 'I 'I mean 'I knew that this would be A' topic of conversation cuz it isn't really encompassing. It's, it's like not even A' food product. So like yeah, 'I

[00:55:19] Chelsey Donn: And like what is the goal with Better Business Bureau because like,

[00:55:23] Trey Gerrald: Right. The major Complaint here is that the manager didn't say sorry once, what are, do you want better business bureau to like close the store? Like what is the goal?

[00:55:33] Chelsey Donn: That's, yeah, like, it's like what is the

[00:55:35] Trey Gerrald: like you were attacked

[00:55:37] Chelsey Donn: Or like 'I guess like if the food quality was like really bad and you got like sick 'I, don't know. 'I, just think like better business bureau because he said,

[00:55:45] Trey Gerrald: extreme issues. Not

[00:55:48] Chelsey Donn: not like my, the flowers were dead and 'I didn't buy them. Right.

[00:55:53] Trey Gerrald: Right.

[00:55:54] Chelsey Donn: Brian didn't like, other than the gas money that they spent to drive there, they didn't spend any money at Trader Joe's.

[00:56:01] Trey Gerrald: Well, 'I also recognize in reading it, A' contradiction cuz Brian is really painting. This manager as like always having A', A', sour puss face on their manager podium. And then it's like when he finally came out of the back. So I'm like, okay, which is it Brian? Are they looking sour pussy up on their little thing or are they making you wait forever because they're in the back somewhere not helping people,

[00:56:26] Chelsey Donn: Yeah,

[00:56:27] Trey Gerrald: which is 'I.

'I mean whatever. Brian was heated 'I mean, look, 'I am someone who 'I will buy flowers when 'I go to Trader Joe's. Very much your Complaint where it's like 'I don't know that I'm going for the flowers like Brian was. But 'I know that. I'm like, let me just get A' fresh popup color to put in my house for the week.

Like I'll grab it. So like 'I do think that there like maybe that's useful. Like cuz 'I do think of the flowers at Trader Joe's. Like that's

[00:56:52] Chelsey Donn: 'I mean it might be useful to know, like maybe this location doesn't have the best inventory, doesn't get the most inventory doesn't sell through the most flowers, so therefore they might not be the freshest, that's the only value 'I can

[00:57:07] Trey Gerrald: but it's kind of reaching.

[00:57:08] Chelsey Donn: It is reaching. It does make me wonder, like why is somebody going to Better Business Bureau to look through reviews?

[00:57:15] Trey Gerrald: 'I think it's age. That's

[00:57:16] Chelsey Donn: Age. Okay, so

[00:57:18] Trey Gerrald: but 'I don't

[00:57:18] Chelsey Donn: else in Brian's age demographic because better Business Bureau is something that's like been around forever. Okay. That's fair. All right.

[00:57:26] Trey Gerrald: But 'I don't know. We're making that up. 'I don't know why Brian went here. Maybe Brian did this on every website, you know? But like 'I do think like maybe when you're older, like you're A' little crotchety and it's like the flowers that 'I wanted. A' terrible. Tell me A', sorry. You know, like maybe the manager walked away because you're being insane about flowers and they have A'

[00:57:44] Chelsey Donn: Well, that's the thing cuz it's like at the end of the 'I mean, listen, 'I do think that he could've been nicer, but at the end of the day, it's like if you're going into the store and be like, the quality of this is terrible, I'm not gonna buy it. And you're like, sorry, we don't have any others that isn't that really just the end of the conversation.

Okay, well then don't buy it.

[00:58:00] Trey Gerrald: Also when you say, this is our procedure. and then the customer is saying, no, it's not. So then you get A' second opinion from someone else who knows the procedure and they confirm what you just said. And then the customer once again says You're wrong. Then you've reached an impasse. There's nowhere else to go.

And like you would think that saying, sorry, is the exit line. So this one like 'I guess just said, well, that's all we have.

[00:58:27] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Just feel

[00:58:29] Trey Gerrald: I'm sorry,

[00:58:30] Chelsey Donn: this is like the perfect example of the like doth protest. Too much 'I. Just don't buy that Brian. So gently put the clothes back on the buy the register. You know what 'I mean? 'I just like 'I. Don't 'I. 'I don't buy that. Like 'I just don't think that Brian was his best self that day.

'I think Brian went in there like A', you know, bull in A' China shop or whatever with like very intense energy coming at this manager. Really hot and heavy. And sometimes that can be hard to deal with. And in A' weird way, it's like making me feel compassion for the manager,

[00:59:08] Trey Gerrald: 'I know it's having A'. Little bit of the opposite impact.

[00:59:12] Chelsey Donn: Cuz I'm just like, ugh,

[00:59:14] Trey Gerrald: What do you think about the phrase heading for dead?

[00:59:18] Chelsey Donn: 'I wrote that down.

[00:59:19] Trey Gerrald: Because they say it twice.

[00:59:21] Chelsey Donn: heard of that before. 'I mean, obviously 'I understand what it means,

[00:59:25] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. It makes like it is like grammatically like heading for dead, but 'I would think heading for death or close to dead.

[00:59:31] Chelsey Donn: close to death. Heading towards death.

[00:59:34] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. 'I don't know.

[00:59:35] Chelsey Donn: Near, near, near dead. 'I. Don't

[00:59:37] Trey Gerrald: Do you think this is typical? . Do you think people are like noticing the $2 increase? Maybe if you buy these flowers every week but

[00:59:44] Chelsey Donn: Maybe. Yeah, maybe 'I. Guess that's like what? That's the, that's the value. Is that like we know the price difference?

[00:59:52] Trey Gerrald: 'I. Think so? Yeah.

[00:59:53] Chelsey Donn: Definitely. No humor here.

[00:59:54] Trey Gerrald: No. Very

[00:59:55] Chelsey Donn: A'. Funny issue for Brian. An ultimate impact, eh? Kind of feel bad for the manager.

[01:00:02] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, it's pretty minimal. 'I mean unless like, cuz 'I do know at Trader Joe's there is A' platform that the floor manager stands on and they ring that bell and they come down and they help with the cashiers and stuff. So like if it does seem like this person is like scowling all the time, that might be A' damper.

But 'I at this point, 'I don't know if 'I can trust the narrator.

[01:00:23] Chelsey Donn: Exactly 'I. Think that's where I'm struggling.

[01:00:25] Trey Gerrald: Yeah. 'I think 'I can crown Brian.

[01:00:27] Chelsey Donn: All right. 'I can crown Brian, let's do.

[01:00:29] Trey Gerrald: Let's do it.

[01:00:30] VOICEOVER: The Queens are Tabulating.

[01:00:37] Chelsey Donn: Were you unanim us again? Okay. One and A' Half Crowns One and A' half crowns. 'I did one and A' half. Honestly, purely because Trader Joe's does pride themselves on being so above and beyond on customer service that 'I feel like in this particular example, we really should be holding our hand to the fire to be very, very, very, And that's why I'm giving Brian that one and A' Half Crown.

But other than that, 'I just like 'I don't really trust the narrator. It's not really giving me A' full picture of the Trader Joe's experience. And there's A', lot of details in here that 'I don't feel like are the manager's fault. Like maybe the pricing or the supplying or the fact that you particularly drove far away to get here.

Like none of that really adds up to this store. Did you wrong? It adds up to you were in A' bad mood and maybe didn't present your best self that day. So for that reason, sorry, Brian. Sorry, Bri. Bri couldn't give you more than one and A' half crowns. How about you? Trey? 'I,

[01:01:37] Trey Gerrald: Yeah, 'I agree. 'I mean 'I said one and A', half 'I. Think strictly for if I'm going to believe that Brian is being truthful. 'I think the Complaint here is that they didn't get A'. Sorry, 'I don't know that. Sorry. Would've had an impact on Brian cuz it seems like Brian was very loaded but 'I said one and A' half.

Cuz 'I feel like, all right, well maybe like, because they mention this manager by name 'I, like 'I think I'll have an impact of like, oddly enough, 'I, better business. You can't see the name, but 'I might have A' feeling of like, okay, maybe management isn't as caring as the brand wants them to be. So that might Nestle somewhere in the recesses of my brain.

[01:02:18] Chelsey Donn: Sure.

[01:02:19] Trey Gerrald: but 'I. Don't know. 'I really feel like this is A' character study more than it is an assessment of this location.

[01:02:25] Chelsey Donn: Totally agree.

[01:02:26] Trey Gerrald: But 'I do love Trader Joe's flowers. So 'I said one and A' half

[01:02:29] Chelsey Donn: 'I heading for dad, basically.

[01:02:31] Trey Gerrald: for dead. Well, to summarize Brian and Brands 'I, mean 'I feel like I'm definitely more A' brands in this conversation than A' Brian.

And we know you are

[01:02:42] Chelsey Donn: Yeah, definitely more of A' friends than A' Bri?

[01:02:45] Trey Gerrald: definitely 'I. Do think the resounding impact here is like we love Trader Joe's because of the brand that they are. And so if there is any experience that deviates from that, then that has an impact because we want to be taken care of because Trader Joe's is very specific in their supply and what they do, the products they carry.

So you

[01:03:08] Chelsey Donn: That's A'. That's A'. Good point. Trey, just quickly, cuz 'I 'I did go to A', trader Joe's once and 'I never returned to that location cuz there was someone that worked there that was like kind of rude and 'I was like, why? Like why would 'I go to A', trader Joe's location where someone was rude when, part of the reason why I'm going to Trader Joe's in the first place is to have A' pleasant experience.

So good point there in the end.

[01:03:31] Trey Gerrald: Funny. This is A', funny tidbit, non-sequitur, but 'I once worked with this guy who was like 23, and he was so negative, so nasty. He was like, even like nasty and shady to me. And he, he, his other job was Trader Joe's and 'I just, hi. Just hearing that 'I thought, that makes no sense. You're, and he actually was fired from my job for being too inhospitable and 'I really thought Wow.

And they're like, A' cashier at Trader Joe's. 'I. Cannot imagine

[01:04:04] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Can't imagine

[01:04:05] Trey Gerrald: 'I mean the shirts are colorful and fun, you know,

[01:04:07] Chelsey Donn: exactly. 'I won't stop. VEing over the Trader Joe's employees, the Trader Joe's experience. The Trader Joe's products. 'I love it. The Trader Joe's candles Don't even get me started. Live for it. And with all this like VEing and ness in mind, Trey, we've officially reached the most regal portion of our show.

Who are you inducting for?

[01:04:32] VOICEOVER: My, Royal, Highness.

[01:04:34] Trey Gerrald: Well ChelseyBD tonight, I'm so thrilled to be inducting.

[01:04:41] Chelsey Donn: Stop.

[01:04:42] Trey Gerrald: sanitizer in the form of A' spray.

[01:04:47] Chelsey Donn: Genius.

[01:04:48] Trey Gerrald: Have you ever had spraying hand sanitizer? Not gel.

[01:04:52] Chelsey Donn: Exclusive. I'm an exclusive spray. Yes.

[01:04:55] Trey Gerrald: Okay, so the product 'I currently have is from Grove and during quarantine, 'I noticed because there was so much hand sanitizer gel that was like going, you know, 'I, think there was like shortages and stuff.

'I. That's the first time 'I noticed these little hand travel sprays. So it is like spritzing little mini and 'I. Keep them in my car. And 'I bought A' huge back stash that 'I keep in the garage. That 'I can keep my car stocked because 'I 'I 'I genuinely don't know what it is. But there is something that is so much more satisfying about spritzing my hands.

It's just A' light mist that 'I can wipe. It's dry so quick compared to the squirting of A' gel. You squirt too much. It's all slippery, sloppy, it goes through your fingers. You don't want it to get it on your

[01:05:42] Chelsey Donn: Really hard to portion control.

[01:05:44] Trey Gerrald: Pushing control is A' challenge. You have to rub A' lot longer because you need it to soak into your skin and it's gel.

And then sometimes there's A' tacky stickiness. 'I hate that. So, you know, for that reason, 'I have to induct hand sanitizing spray as My. Royal Highness. It is just, it is the tit as

[01:06:04] Chelsey Donn: the tits just to bring everything together. Full circle, try. Can you read what this spray says?

[01:06:12] Trey Gerrald: Um, lavender hand sanitizer Spray. Trader Joe's.

[01:06:19] Chelsey Donn: Joe's 'I Love getting the spray

[01:06:23] Trey Gerrald: Is that A'?

[01:06:24] Chelsey Donn: from Trader Joe's. It is like, just like all the others, but sheer smells really good. 'I like, I'm only mad that you made this induction because now 'I can't because 'I Li, like even before Covid 'I 'I was A' big hand sanitizer girl. And as soon as 'I found the spray, 'I was like never looking back.

[01:06:44] Trey Gerrald: This one specifically is blood orange Scent. Oh my God.

[01:06:49] Chelsey Donn: orange.

[01:06:50] Trey Gerrald: Oh my

[01:06:51] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God.

[01:06:53] Trey Gerrald: my God. All right, now we've gotten weird. Well, that's my, um, that's my,

[01:06:59] Chelsey Donn: Joe.

[01:07:01] Trey Gerrald: that's my induction 'I.

[01:07:03] Chelsey Donn: Wow. Spritz.

[01:07:05] Trey Gerrald: Maybe I'm late, like 'I am for everything. But if you've never Yes. So satisfying. If you've never had hand sanitizing spray 'I guarantee it's gonna lighten up your life more

[01:07:14] Chelsey Donn: You'll never look back. You'll never look back.

[01:07:17] Trey Gerrald: Well, that's it, Queen. We did it. That is another round on the r you A'. 900 variety.

Froyo rq. Ferris Wheel of Life. Is it outta water?

[01:07:27] Chelsey Donn: is it outta water. Thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, please tell A' friend.

[01:07:34] Trey Gerrald: If you didn't like what you heard, please tell an enemy. If you have zero friends and zero enemies, but you would like your chance to be featured on our show, then all you gotta do is very simple. Leave us A' review. It really does help. You can do so on Apple Podcasts or on Spotify, or on Pod Chaser, or on all of those platforms.

[01:07:55] Chelsey Donn: Yes, we've made it super easy with A' Super cute link. Love the podcast.com/the Review Queen. If you'd like to support the production of our show, visit Review That Review dot com slash donate, where even A' dollar tip is much appreciated.

[01:08:12] Trey Gerrald: our mailing list at Review That Review dot com to stay up to date with all of the goings on in the queendom

[01:08:17] Chelsey Donn: And you have A' Kvetch. Call A' Kvetch line one eight five review zero. You can also follow us on all the socials at the Review Queen. 'I am at ChelseyBD 'I.

[01:08:29] Trey Gerrald: and 'I am at Terry Gerrald.

[01:08:34] Chelsey Donn: Terry Gerrald

[01:08:35] Trey Gerrald: Terry Gerard.

[01:08:37] Chelsey Donn: Gerard.

[01:08:37] Trey Gerrald: On this week's after show Pod, we are gonna be rating and reviewing A' two-star Amazon review. Four Accu Time kids, Nickelodeon jojo, C Y, educational learning touch screens, smartwatch toy for girls, boys, toddlers, selfie cam learning games, alarm calculator, pedometer, and more Model J O J 4 1 2 8, A' Z.

[01:09:12] Chelsey Donn: Wow,

[01:09:13] VOICEOVER: coloristic.

[01:09:15] Chelsey Donn: that's A' mouthful.

[01:09:16] Trey Gerrald: So to find out what made ChelseyBD say

[01:09:19] Chelsey Donn: This is mean. I'm sure Maddie Ziegler is very nice, but like there was like A' boringness to that sort of tenacity, if that makes sense. And to find out what made Trey say.

[01:09:29] Trey Gerrald: your little peach is not gonna wear this on her wedding day.

[01:09:32] Chelsey Donn: Then join our Patreon page at Review That Review dot com slash Patreon to hear our weekly members only after show companion podcast.

[01:09:44] Trey Gerrald: And remember,

[01:09:46] Chelsey Donn: Ignore the haters. You're A' freaking kinky. Queen.

[01:09:52] Trey Gerrald: agenda, non-specific. Freaky kinky. Queen.

[01:09:58] Chelsey Donn: Bye.

[01:09:59] Trey Gerrald: Goodbye.

[01:10:00] Chelsey Donn: Oh my God.



Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.



[01:10:20] Chelsey Donn: 'I. Feel like the Museum of Sex should have like A' Trader Joe's section.

[01:10:24] Trey Gerrald: What do you mean? Oh, for the kinkiness?

[01:10:27] Chelsey Donn: remember like the Museum of Sex had like all those like kink rooms,

[01:10:31] Trey Gerrald: Just like A', an image of Trader Jess

[01:10:33] Chelsey Donn: like A' room where you can like get A' grocery cart and then A' million people could come up to you and be like, how may 'I help you? 'I don't

[01:10:40] Trey Gerrald: hook A', shell necklaces, and Hawaiian shirts. with A'. Huge giant paddle that says line starts here.

[01:10:49] Chelsey Donn: 'I mean it's kind of hot. I'm not gonna lie. Friends 'I think you are. You're helping me discover something new about myself.

[01:10:57] Trey Gerrald: That sounds cool.

[01:11:01] Chelsey Donn: Put it in water. 'I.


 

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